The Space Between Us- Chapter 14
CHAPTER 14: Message in a Bottle
Back to Chapter 13
They were playing sockball when they heard the footsteps. The clanking of Centurions and the softer footfalls of at least one humanoid model. Sarah tucked the ball behind her back, and Felix and Brooks exchanged worried glances. Felix's shoulder had healed to the point where he could move it, and the last thing he wanted was to go through another round with Cavil like the last one.
The intruders rounded the corner and appeared at the entrance, and wasn't sure if he was relieved or more worried. Because just as Dee had said, there was Hera, clinging to Boomer's hand.
"She's had another growth spurt," Dee sighed. Hera looked terrified, but she also didn't look any worse for the wear. Her purple shirt was rumpled but unstained and untorn, and she was walking under her own power.
Hera spotted Felix and Brooks, and her eyes lit up with recognition. But she didn't move, still clinging to Boomer's hand. They all looked at Cavil.
"Well," he scowled at Hera. "Get in there." He pushed Hera's shoulder, and Boomer wrested her hand free, although Felix thought he saw a little reluctance. "You three deal with her," Cavil ordered. "Keep her alive. I'll be back for her later." He grabbed Boomer by the upper arm and pulled her away.
Hera's eyes widened. "Boomer!" she shouted. "Boomer!" She began to cry.
Felix limped over to her. "Hey," he said soothingly. "It's okay, Hera." Hera snuffled and wiped her nose on her arm, looking at him. He looked appealingly at Sarah and Brooks. Sarah was half frozen, but Brooks came on over.
"Hey, Hera," he said, and his voice was almost cheerful. "You know me, right?" Hera nodded. "You're going to be okay in here with us. We're not going to hurt you." Hera looked at him suspiciously. "Has Cavil been hurting you?" Hera shook her head. "Are you scared?" She nodded.
"It's okay to be scared," Brooks told her. "We're scared, too. But we've got something here." He nudged Sarah, and she finally realized what he wanted and gave him the ball. "Want to play ball with us?" Hera nodded. "Good. You sit over there."
They formed their circle again, and this time they kept it smaller. Felix noticed that Sarah kept stealing looks at Hera, and her expression almost looked like fear. Brooks was extremely good with Hera, keeping up a stream of pleasant chatter. Hera didn't answer, but he didn't seem to mind.
A Centurion eventually brought food; protein bars, moldy bread, and overripe apples that were way too tart, but juicy. Hera's eyes lit up when she saw the apple. Brooks broke off pieces that weren't too mushy and gave them to her, and she nibbled at them.
"You're awfully good with her," Felix said to Brooks. "Do you know Sharon and Helo well?" Brooks shook his head, but he didn't elaborate. "What else do we need to do for her?" Felix asked. "I don't know the first thing about kids."
"We'll mange it," Brooks promised. He looked at Hera, who was still nibbling at her bits of apple. "What do you think Cavil wants with her?"
"I don't know, but it's probably not a good idea to find out," Felix said. "When the Four comes, we'll get this plan moving."
***
Hera.
Sarah stared at the small girl, who was now rolling the sockball back and forth with Gaeta. She was such a pretty little thing, with curls and big eyes- even prettier than she was from afar. She remembered holding Hera the first time she was on the baseship, when she was bigger than an infant, but not quite a real girl yet. Hera hadn't fit naturally into her arms, and hadn't calmed as Sarah took her at all. She remembered shifting the child uncomfortably on her hip for a moment, marveling at the little miracle, and then handing her off to another Eight as quickly as she could manage.
Brooks emerged from the head and watched Gaeta and Hera playing with the sockball for a long moment. Sarah thought he might join them, but he looked over at her and came and sat down.
"Do you mind?" he asked. Sarah shook her head. "You don't look so good," Brooks observed.
"I'm fine," Sarah murmured automatically, her hands lingering protectively over her stomach.
"Yeah?" Brooks sighed. "Glad someone is. I'm not." Sarah turned her head sharply, but Brooks was watching Gaeta and Hera. "Don't know why I think sitting with you is going to help, but it's easier than dealing with her."
"You don't like kids?" Sarah asked.
"I love kids," Brooks said. "Especially my own, back on Tauron."
"You have children?" Sarah asked, surprised.
"I did," he said, and his meaning struck her hard. She'd realized, many times before, that children had been killed in their attack on the Colonies. She'd moved their little bodies off the street, for frak's sake. But looking at Hera and wrapping her arms around the beginnings of a bulge in her middle, this was the first time she even vaguely understood what that had done to people. She couldn't say a word… she only bowed her head.
"Don't think I can ever forgive that," Brooks said conversationally. "I miss them every day. But you'll see what it's like, when you've got one of your own. And you'll have to live with it, knowing that you did to all of us the thing you'll fear the most."
"Shut up," Sarah ordered.
"You blew up my family. I've been awfully good up until now, but I think I have the right to tell you the truth, even if you don't want to hear it."
"Fine," Sarah relented, knocking her head back against the wall. "Go ahead."
Brooks didn't say anything for a long while; he just sat watching Gaeta and Hera. Sarah watched them, too. Finally, when the silence grew too much for her, she sighed. "How does he know what to do with her?" she asked.
"Hmm?"
"I can't even really speak to her. All that cooing and baby talk… it's stupid."
"He's not using baby talk. He's just changing his voice and using simpler words."
"Did you know what to do with your kids when they were born?"
"Sure. The manual they came with told me everything," he said sarcastically. He looked at her again, and there must have been something in her face, something of the terror she felt every time she looked at Hera. "No one knows what they're doing," he said. "Look. I've been through a lot, okay? We all have. And despite the frakking apocalypse your people reigned down on ours, the most terrifying moment of my life was when the nurse discharged my wife and my first son from the hospital. No more help, no more guidance… just boom. You're on your own. Bye, see you, good luck, keep the kid alive."
"Oh good God," Sarah said. At one time she might have laughed, but now the thought was overwhelming.
"Yeah. But the last time I saw him, he was seven and waving good-bye to me, with a grin on his face and a toy truck in his hand."
Sarah wiped irritably at her eyes. "It's just that," she began, and shook her head angrily. "It's just that, seeing Hera, it's real all of a sudden. I'm going to have a baby, and I don't know what the frak to do. Except for Hera, I've never even seen a living child up close. And I don't know what to do with her! I never have! When she was on the baseship, I just wanted to hand her back as fast as I could! What the frak am I going to do with a baby?"
"You're going to have it, you're going to love it, and you're going to learn more than you ever thought possible, and it will become second nature before you know it. You're going to spend the rest of your life in doubt, always worrying if you're doing the right thing. You're going to be convinced you're the biggest frak-up in the world. You're going to find your life invaded, you're going to find your world turned upside down, and you're going to swing wildly from wanting to kill it to worshipping it. Your life is never going to be the same, but you will manage. And you'll spend the rest of your life incomplete, because when you have a kid, it's like you walk around with your heart outside your body all the time."
The tears were flowing freely down her face now, and Sarah didn't even bother to check them. She looked at Brooks, but he was still staring forward, not looking at her. Her lips moved, but the words wouldn't come. No words would come, and it was okay because no words were sufficient. She reached out and put a hand on his arm.
Brooks looked back at her. She couldn't read his expression, aside from pain. So much pain, so much loss. He just stared at her.
"All the time we've been here," she finally managed to say, "you've never said. You could have… there must have been something…."
"What could I have done?" Brooks asked. "You're stronger than me- I couldn't beat you in a hand-to-hand fight. I have no weapon. And talking about it, even to make you understand…"
"Tears you apart," Sarah finished. "God."
"Yeah. Gods," Brooks said. He struggled to his feet. "I think I'm going to…" he shook his head, and then disappeared to the head. Sarah watched him go.
Like you walk around with your heart outside your body all the time. The words echoed in her mind, blazoned on her soul.
We should never be forgiven.
***
Brooks and Sarah were asleep, and Hera was huddled against Brooks. She still hadn't spoken in the hours that she'd been in here, but she at least attached herself to one of them. Felix took that as a good sign.
"It's really going to happen, Felix," Dee told him. "They'll come for you."
"Now that we have Hera here with us, huh?" Felix said. "Dee, what am I going to do when I get back to the Galactica?"
"What do you mean?" Dee asked, settling down next to him. "Is this about the lists?"
Felix shook his head. "That's not what I'm talking about," he said. "It's Adama. Adama, and Earth, and Tigh still being XO. Pushing Tom Zarek out of office, not having any sort of backup plan… forging an alliance with the Cylons…. And why now? Why is he coming now, after Hera's been taken? Why not as soon as he found out we were alive? I could forgive it before Ellen and Boomer left- he must have assumed we were dead. But if you're right…"
"Don't dwell on it," Dee advised. "He's not a god, Felix. He's just a man."
"And every time I look at him, I see you," Felix muttered.
Dee shook her head. "Get home first. The rest will take care of itself."
"What, it will all be all right?"
"No. But after he gets you off of here, it will counterbalance. You'll still see the bad, but you'll see the good you once saw, too. You'll see the truth of Bill Adama; all the highs and all the lows, all the things he can be, and all the depths he sinks to. You'll be able to follow him again, even if it's not like it was before."
"I hope so." But he looked at Sarah, curled on her side, and thought he might understand the Cylon alliance a little more than he did before. Desperate times and desperate measures- they were really trusting an Eight and a Four.
"He's coming for us," Felix whispered to himself. "We're going to make sure of it."
***
"All right," Sarah said, staring at the razor they'd taken from the bathroom. "Are we ready?"
Brooks crammed himself under the sink. "You're sure it's this cable?" he said, pointing to it.
"I'm positive." She looked out at the Four, who was standing outside the head. "A count of two hundred?"
"Two hundred. That will give me time to get out of here, get networked, and be ready." He glanced over his shoulder at the Centurion guards. "I've got them programmed not to report it, but we're still going to have to work fast, just in case."
Sarah glanced at Brooks, and then at Gaeta, who was watching with his hand on Hera's shoulder. "Well, we're ready," she said. "On three. One, two…."
"Three," they said together. The Four nodded, and then walked out.
Sarah began to count. It was easy, internal and sequential, as regular as heartbeats. When she got to fifty, she turned to the other two. "What are your messages?" she asked.
"'Tell Laird that he won seventeen cubits and a bung wrench off me in our last hand of Triad'," Brooks supplied.
Sarah nodded, and then looked at Gaeta expectantly. He sighed. "'Tell Louis 'you won the race, so the gods must exist'.'"
"That's…" Sarah made a face. "Not overly romantic."
"Well, private jokes often aren't. And it is, actually, because it's what I said right before we kissed for the first time." Gaeta flushed irritably. "It will work."
Sarah shook her head.
"What's the count?" Brooks asked.
"One fifty two," Sarah said. She could barely see Hera, only her shoulder and elbow as she sat quietly on the bed next to Gaeta. An awkward silence descended for a few seconds, and then Sarah picked up one of the razors. She took a deep breath and cut into her hand. It hurt, but she closed her eyes for a moment and projected Jesse, sitting on the floor and watching her with that warm smile that made her melt every time. It helped. The count was still going.
"One ninety seven, one ninety eight, one ninety nine… two hundred."
Brooks nicked the cable under the sink and handed it to her. Sarah inserted it into her hand, pushing it all the way up her arm. Jesse put a hand on her other arm, strengthening her.
Then she felt it, that connection.
It was strange to feel so outside of the data stream. None of the language of her sisters, or the grace notes of the Sixes, or the swirlings of the Twos. Just the hard metallic codes of Ones, the brightness of Fives, and the grounding of Fours.
And there it was. A Four came up, surrounding her signal, enrobing her with his code. It made her feel safe in a completely alien way.
Together they swam through the data stream. She instinctively knew where she was going, what she needed. A port, an exit, a springboard through space, communicating with the baseship light years away.
She transmitted.
We're alive on the Colony. In exactly forty eight hours, we will try to shut down the hybrids. Come then.
Tell Laird that he won seventeen cubits and a bung wrench off Brooks in our last hand of Triad. Tell Louis he won the race, so the gods must exist. Tell Jesse that I called the constellation The Great Dog, and he called it The Fruit Bowl. This is really us. We're here, we're alive, and Hera is with us.
Please. Come for us.
The message formed, a glowing ball of light, and then she saw it hurtling away from her, speeding through space like a comet. She watched it for a minute, and then felt a firm prodding.
Disconnect.
She pulled the cable out of her arm. The pain almost made her scream, and she bit down on it. She returned back to the pulsing walls of their cell and their head, Brooks watching her anxiously. Jesse was gone.
"You okay?" Brooks said.
Sarah took a deep breath, and then smiled. "Yeah," she realized. The pain was already fading. "The message was sent. In forty eight hours, we'll see if they come for us."
"From your mouth to Poseidon's ears," Brooks muttered, and Sarah couldn't help but smile at him.
***
On to Chapter 15