building bomb shelters under your skin

[musesfool]

I can't stop listening to Daylight by Matt & Kim. It's a little gem of pure pop perfection and I can't get enough. Thank you to whoever it was I snagged it from (I feel like it was probably hackthis, since so much of the music I end up loving comes from her).

As a bonus, since I uploaded it for my niece, If I Can't Change Your Mind by Sugar, which is one

Comments

[dotfic]

Those are some impressive thinky ramblings. I think you got at what was so murky about Sam and the demon powers and what the show was trying to say about them -- every time I try to talk about it, I get tripped up in rambles like "well, but maybe he was right except he was wrong, except what if he's maybe right after all, only he was using it for the wrong purposes, but maybe it really is bad for him to use them but maybe it's how you use the weapon that counts..." All during S4 I kept waffling back and forth. Sam was saving the meatsuits, he and Dean could use the extra fire power (because they're so deeply screwed), and then on the other hand, SAM WHAT ARE YOU DOING NO! With the lying and the drinking blood. But he lied because...but even that's tangled. He lied because he feared Dean's condemnation. But he also lied because Dean would keep him from being able to rationalize this to himself

[sadcypress]

My main points have always been that- exactly as you say- Sam went BATSHIT INSANE after 'Mystery Spot.' Even if Kripke thinks hell is meathooks and physical torture, I am 100% convinced that hell for Sam is losing Dean over and over and over again, and then losing him for good. If you forgive the comparison, you can't go back to being a regular kid after Narnia, and you can't just go back to business as usual after so many Tuesdays and a world after Wednesday. I also think Sam's world crumbled again when he failed and Dean went to hell- any hold on normality after that was lost, and Sam gave up hope of regaining it

[innie_darling]

Dean sold his soul and so all in one go he died and went to hell . . . whereas Sam - Sam sold his soul piece by painful piece I'd argue that Sam had the trickier task in that he was trying to hold a piece of himself back as well. Dean gives his all to save Sam - that's excruciatingly outlined as he tries to bargain the Crossroads Demon into giving him ten years, then nine, then eight, etc. He gives everything and gets everything in return. But Sam? Sam is trying to save his brother, and that means he has to save himself too, so that he can be there when he keeps Dean out of hell, or when he gets Dean back. So there's another switch that's thrown, which is when Sam stops trying to keep himself intact for his brother's sake and just decides to turn himself into a weapon to avenge his brother.