Six Steps Towards Something [PG] (Part I)liebedanceAugust 6 2011, 22:21:36 UTC
First Year
He was rotten, James Potter was. God, he was spoiled. Had everything under the sun - the loving family, the mountains of gold, the boyish charm, the adoring friends - and it was so obvious he knew it. And, Lily was so glad that Sev had never been so over-indulged.
Second Year
At least once a week, something was blown up. A cauldron of half-brewed potions, charmed pineapples, telescopes, suits of armour... It was, Lily thought, like a castle-wide game of Exploding Snap. Nothing and nobody was completely safe from Black and Potter.
"Why do they do that?" whispered to Sev as Professor McGonagall was reprimanding them for a particularly loud and messy explosion at breakfast that morning.
Sev just rolled his eyes. "They're immature, Lily. There's nothing else to it."
Lily crinkled her nose in distaste, thanking Merlin that she had chosen someone much more mature as a best mate.
Third Year"Ouch!" Lily exclaimed, shaking her now-throbbing hand. "Potter, watch what you're doing
( ... )
Re: Six Steps Towards Something [PG] (Part II)liebedanceAugust 6 2011, 22:21:49 UTC
Fifth Year
"Oi, Evans!"
"Not again," Lily half-moaned, rubbing her hand against her forehead in frustration. Bracing herself, she put down her book and turned to look at the boy who was approaching her. It was a beautiful autumn day out, and Lily did not want to deal with this. "What do you want, Potter?"
"For you to go to Hogsmeade with me on Halloween."
"Not a chance," Lily replied, not missing a beat. This song and dance was getting old, and Lily knew the moves too well.
"Evans, c'mon, I'll show you a brilliant time." James filled his next line with practised ease. "Ditch Snivelly for a real man
( ... )
Re: Six Steps Towards Something [PG] (Part II)amethysthAugust 6 2011, 22:58:15 UTC
This is beautiful. I love how naturally the comparisons came, how she wasn't even trying but Sev was her best mate, so she couldn't help but make them. And the last part was just so beautiful. I definitely fell in love with James again reading that scene. Amazing.
Re: Six Steps Towards Something [PG] (Part II)liebedanceAugust 7 2011, 15:49:30 UTC
I definitely fell in love with James again reading that scene. -- probably one of the best comments I could get on an L/J fic, yeah? Thanks so much, dear.
Re: Six Steps Towards Something [PG] (Part II)peskywhistpawAugust 7 2011, 00:06:14 UTC
The progression of this really is great, both in terms of her relationship with Severus, and her relationship with James. And the last line is totally perfect. Great work!
Re: Six Steps Towards Something [PG] (Part II)museme87August 7 2011, 01:05:04 UTC
I really appreciated this fic on a multitude of reasons, but one of the most prominent was all the nods to canon (both book and movie and head, lol). Like amethysth said, Lily didn't go out of her way to make the comparisons, which made the whole thing feel incredibly natural. You've done so much development in such a brief piece that it's quite incredible. Kudos to you, bb!
Re: Six Steps Towards Something [PG] (Part II)liebedanceAugust 7 2011, 15:50:48 UTC
Multitude of reasons? Do I get the other reasons, too? Or are you afraid of me ending up with a James-Potter-sized head? Haha. But, thanks, bb. Your opinion may be the most important! ♥
Re: Six Steps Towards Something [PG] (Part II)starry_laaAugust 7 2011, 09:16:59 UTC
This is wonderful and so beautifully written. It flowed really well and the comparisons were really subtle. I loved how in the end, James being there for Lily and giving her chocolate was enough fpr her to change her mind about him.
Re: Six Steps Towards Something [PG] (Part II)ballyharnonAugust 7 2011, 15:40:10 UTC
Oh, I quite like this. I love that you -and Lily- pick up on how cruel and awful it was of them to be such absolute bullies, and Remus' line 'sometimes it's funny' was shockingly perfect for our naughty prefect.
Petunia's letter was unexpected and really gutting... Poor Lily, but good on you for the unique-but-in-character situation.
He was rotten, James Potter was. God, he was spoiled. Had everything under the sun - the loving family, the mountains of gold, the boyish charm, the adoring friends - and it was so obvious he knew it. And, Lily was so glad that Sev had never been so over-indulged.
Second Year
At least once a week, something was blown up. A cauldron of half-brewed potions, charmed pineapples, telescopes, suits of armour... It was, Lily thought, like a castle-wide game of Exploding Snap. Nothing and nobody was completely safe from Black and Potter.
"Why do they do that?" whispered to Sev as Professor McGonagall was reprimanding them for a particularly loud and messy explosion at breakfast that morning.
Sev just rolled his eyes. "They're immature, Lily. There's nothing else to it."
Lily crinkled her nose in distaste, thanking Merlin that she had chosen someone much more mature as a best mate.
Third Year"Ouch!" Lily exclaimed, shaking her now-throbbing hand. "Potter, watch what you're doing ( ... )
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"Oi, Evans!"
"Not again," Lily half-moaned, rubbing her hand against her forehead in frustration. Bracing herself, she put down her book and turned to look at the boy who was approaching her. It was a beautiful autumn day out, and Lily did not want to deal with this. "What do you want, Potter?"
"For you to go to Hogsmeade with me on Halloween."
"Not a chance," Lily replied, not missing a beat. This song and dance was getting old, and Lily knew the moves too well.
"Evans, c'mon, I'll show you a brilliant time." James filled his next line with practised ease. "Ditch Snivelly for a real man ( ... )
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I especially love the biting gnome, though I don't know why. XD
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Petunia's letter was unexpected and really gutting... Poor Lily, but good on you for the unique-but-in-character situation.
♥
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