[poly] perils and pitfalls of parity

[much_ado]

i keep tripping up on the internalized expectation that what's good for the goose must also be good for the gander, with no room for differentiation, or we're doing something wrong. even as i keep reminding myself, "it's like we're two different people", i keep expecting that the things that bug me and want specific behaviours to redress, are also

Comments

[bakestondone]

Are Parity and Fair the same thing? I think that is also something that can come into play especially in a relationship which falls under the influence of D/s associations. Do The Rules set down in the D/s relationship bleed through into the way that the Poly relationship is recognized and dealt with?

I know most people looking at my own relationships from the outside would certainly agree that Parity and Fair are Not equal. There are Rules which I set down for all and which are followed. They are not the same for me and for everyone else. There is a reason that Rule Number Three is "The Katie is always right".

I know I seem to be changing the ideas and topic of the above post but its something to think about. Are the weasels getting jumpy because of the visible actions which make them uncomfortable or are they perceiving a deeper threat?

Hmm apparently I make no sense today... dont feel like deleting it so you get to see what I was confusing myself with. Your post is certainly thoughtful

[corbet]

There's a natural disparity in every [open] relationship, IMO -- a disparity of comfort levels. You can't force a comfort level (though perhaps you might gradually increase it over time with effort). Given that, it seems natural (to me) that there will be disparities in action too