"Hello? Is this thing on? Hello? It didn't beep. BEEP, you stupid machine!!! I want to record my voice-thingy-greeting! Stupid piece of junk doesn't even work right. It was probably made by some dumb hippie in China or San Francisco or some other Communist country. C'mon, you stupid... THAT DOES IT!!!" *hissing, meowing, and clattering ( Read more... )

Christmas was over, and Bucky was just about done with this place. He finished packing the last of his presents inside the cat carrier and called out for the human tumor that claimed to own the apartment. "Hey, Monkey Boy! Get your #*&$ over here! My plane leaves in a few hours, and this kitty mansion isn't about to haul itself!"

( In which a cat owner is puzzled by his pet's behavior )

Inside the pile of covers haphazardly arranged on Bucky's bed, there was a barely audible "foomph". Bucky had spent the last week and a half as a buckyball, a tiny molecule of carbon -- and now he was back ( Read more... )

Bucky's bed looked empty, normally. For whatever reason he had actual, normal sheets and pillows and a comforter and everything, but he didn't really use them the way humans did. In fact, what he'd done was to pile them all up in a heap in the middle of the bed and burrow into the middle of it. Most days, the only way you'd know he was there ( Read more... )

( When Rob arrived home, he looked tired, angry, and very much frustrated... )

( WTF a talking cat )