i think i have found god.

mum: let's go to the pet section.
me: sure?
mum: i want to make sure the grandkids have everything they need.
me: grandkids?
mum: oh, you know, the rats.
me: you love them.

830am wake up call ( Read more... )

crap, and im supposed to be a poetry major. hopefully i wont be unknown. and who the fuck is elizabeth short??

i got rory when i was 5. i originally named him aurora because i had just seen sleeping beauty and the princess' name was aurora. in my excitement to name him i didnt notice his nutsac. so we shortened it to rory. once he got a little bigger he creeped alissa out. she thought he was always staring at her. i wasnt scared of him even though he made ( Read more... )

ANCIENT JAPANESE PORN AND A HANDMADE EAT YOUR BROCCOLI BAG IN THE MAIL.

HOW DID I GET SO LUCKY?

center>      Marriage is love.

( Read more... )

i dont know if i'll do it again soon.
depends on the money situation.

oh, im being sued by shaws for $500.

i love america.

you better believe it.