Fic: Don't Ever Look Back 8/9 (Supernatural; Dean/Castiel, HS AU, Explicit)
Title: Don't Ever Look Back
Author: misachan
Artist: slinkymilinky (Link to Art Master Post)
Word Count: 4900
Characters/Pairings: Dean/Castiel, Dean/Anna, Sam, Uriel, Zachariah
Warnings: Violence (including violence between family members), drug use (nothing stronger than pot), underage drinking (nothing harder than beer), sex between an 18 and 17-year-old, sexuality angst
Summary: Another day, another town; when their bounty hunter father enrolls he and Sam in yet another school Dean thinks this will just be another town he'll forget five minutes after he leaves it. Things get more interesting when Sam befriends a classmate of Dean's and the lonely boy with the strange name and stranger family slowly gets under Dean's skin. Their new friendship gets complicated when it becomes clear that Castiel's brothers aren't just strange, they're dangerous, and the secrets they keep and the sins they bury have a lot to do with Dean. It would all be bad enough even without Dean starting to worry that maybe friendship isn't all he wants.
A Dean/Castiel high school love story with fist fights, movie nights, make outs, broken hearts, hospital vigils and a steamed up hotel shower.
They said Cas would be sprung in four days but kept him one extra, wanting to be careful since to hear the doctors talk any little infection could make him drop dead. Dean didn't know how many of them really believed Anna's little engaged lie, but to Dean's relief they all seemed willing to run with it. They were even willing to release Castiel into her custody, which in reality was Dean's custody since she could only stick around so much longer. And it was a good thing too, because Dean didn't know how long he could deal with Cas being out of his sight right then.
He sat through the doctors talking them through taking care of the stitches, how to keep the incision clean, all the things Dean had known how to do since he was a little kid. It seemed like it took a thousand years before the doctors would finally let him go, and the entire time Dean was waiting for Michael to show up, or Raphael, one of them to appear and say that no, Cas had to go with them.
It never happened though, and Dean almost couldn't believe it when they were finally able to ease Castiel into the Impala's passenger seat, Sam stretching out in the back without complaint. Cas was out like a light almost immediately and Dean eased out of the spot, taking the long way back to make sure he kept to the smoothest roads.
At every red light he patted the key card in his pocket to make sure it was still there. He didn't know what kind of money deacons made but Anna had shelled out for a month at one of the nicer hotel suites - not a four star anything, just one of the efficiency places people stayed in when traveling on business - because she didn't want, as she put it, "my brother recovering in a flop house." She'd said her goodbyes that morning when the doctors finally stopped dithering over whether to keep him one more day; she'd slipped the card into his pocket, wrapped in a note that read Break his heart again and I'll skin you alive. Dean hoped she followed through on that, too.
Once they were there he and Sam prodded Cas out of the car and into the room, dropping him onto a bed that was so comfortable Dean frankly wondered if he'd be able to sleep on it. Cas didn't seem to have any trouble, though; as soon as they lay him down he stretched out like a cat, or as much as cat could with stitches in his side, anyway. "I gotta drop Sam off at his buddy's, Cas. You think you can avoid dropping dead if I leave you alone for five minutes?"
"I think I can manage," he said, his eyes closed and looking like the very picture of bliss. "This bed is much better than the one at the hospital."
"I bet. When I get back we'll get some food in you that's better than at the hospital, too. Pizza sound good?"
"Anything you get will be fine."
"Actually, Dean," Sam piped up, "I could probably walk from here. Trevor's actually closer now than he was from the old place."
"You sure? It's dark already."
"Yeah, it's not that dark yet. And the neighborhood's way better."
"If you're cool with it. Call me when you get there, and I mean the second you walk in the door."
Sam rolled his eyes. "Yes, mom," he said, shouldering his backpack.
Dean threw the spare key card at him. "Here, pest, before I decide not to let you in. You gonna need a ride back?"
"Nah, Trevor's mom can drive me. I'm good."
Dean didn't miss the grateful look Cas gave Sam as he left or the little nod Sam gave him in return, he just chose not think too hard about it. Dean stretched out next to him, still a little amazed he was in a hotel nice enough to have beds big enough for two people to lie down on. "What do you want on your pizza, Cas?" he said, picking up the bedside phone.
"Mushrooms and extra cheese," he said, almost shyly.
"Dude. Gross." Dean grinned at the annoyed glare Cas gave him. "You'll have to have your own," he said, placing the order.
After the food came Dean flipped through the channels, stopping when an explosion caught his eye. "Hey, Cas," he said, nudging his shoulder. "We watch this one during the last Statham-athon?"
Castiel studied the screen. "I don't believe so."
"Cool. This one's just starting. It's one of his drives-stuff ones, I know they're not your favorite."
"I like them too," Castiel said, settling back against the pillows.
Midway through the movie the food was long gone and Dean felt full and sleepy and happier than he had in a good long time. "You feel okay? Anything hurt?"
"For the thousandth time, no. I'm sore, that's all."
"Just checking. There any of the soda left?"
"There should be another bottle."
"Toss it over here, then."
"Get it yourself. I'm comfortable."
Dean rolled his eyes. "Lazy pain in the ass." Not that Dean was getting up either, instead reaching over him to grab the bottle, careful to not put pressure on Castiel's incision.
He never got the soda. As he hovered over Cas trying to reach he felt Castiel take a deep breath. Dean looked down, worried that he'd hurt him, but before he could ask anything Castiel leaned up on one elbow and kissed him, a much more careful kiss than the first time. When Cas pulled back Dean saw terror bright in his eyes and knew it was his fault it was there. "You said I could do that," he whispered, looking up at Dean like he was waiting for judgment.
"Yeah, I did," Dean said, stroking his thumb lightly along the bruise on his cheek. "Didn't know you'd heard me."
"I wasn't sure it was real. Dean, I...."
Dean kissed him before he could say another word and he felt the soft moan Cas let out wash through him like a drug. Castiel's lips parted and Dean deepened the kiss, keeping it slow and careful because he knew Cas' lip was still sore and swollen from the fight. He felt Castiel reach up to trace one hand down his jaw, just the tips of his fingers light along his jaw line. This time Dean was the one to pull back, spending a moment to take in Castiel lying there this flushed and his eyes this wide. He'd dreamed about making Cas look like that. "You okay?"
Castiel nodded. "I didn't mean it when I said we shouldn't be friends anymore," he said, still a little breathless.
"Figured that, Cas," Dean said, nuzzling along his neck. "Does kissing like that hurt? With your lip still busted up, I mean?"
"A little," Cas admitted. "That doesn't mean I want to stop," he added quickly, like he thought Dean was just going to say the hell with it, then.
Dean just grinned. "Plenty of stuff we can still do." Before Cas could ask what he meant by that Dean levered himself over Castiel, careful to keep his weight off of him. He started at Castiel's hairline and worked his way down, very, very slowly, tracing along the curve of his temple, down the slope of his cheek. When he trailed his tongue along Cas' upper lip Dean felt his breath shudder and smiled to himself. "You tell me the second something hurts, okay?" Castiel nodded and Dean went back to work, kissing his way down Cas' neck and licking his way back up, lingering along the pulse point and feeling Castiel's heart start to race faster. "Dean," he breathed, tipping his chin up as if he wanted to encourage Dean to do that again.
Dean was only too happy to oblige. "I like the way you say that," he admitted, scraping his teeth very, very lighting over his skin.
"Do you?" Dean could feel the vibration of that raspy voice against this lips. "I like saying it." Cas' hands reached up his arms, nails digging in whenever Dean found a good spot and Dean had dreamed about this but the reality was so much better. This was real and Dean could take as much time as he wanted, he could stretch every second so he could savor every moan and little breathy flutter.
Cas pressed up against him when Dean tongued the hollow of this throat and Dean had to close his eyes to gather himself for a second. "Jesus, Cas," he whispered, nibbling on his earlobe. "That's not helping." He could actually feel Castiel smirk at that. Cas moaned again when Dean licked along the curve of his collarbone, pressing against Dean again, but this time Dean felt him tense. Dean looked up too fast for Castiel to hide the pained wince. "Okay, that's enough," he said, rolling off of him. Cas groaned and Dean wrapped one arm around him. "Hey, I'm not exactly thrilled about it either," Dean said, making sure Castiel could feel how much Dean didn't want to stop just them. "We'll have plenty of time when you're healed up."
"I feel fine," Cas said with an annoyed little huff.
"You're one big bruise and you're full of stitches. We're gonna take things a little slow for a while." He rolled to his back, letting Castiel's head rest in the crook of his arm. "Rest up, okay? You've kind of had a day."
"I'm fine," Castiel insisted, snuggling next to Dean and full-on pouting. Dean ignored it and tried to figure out what had happened in the movie since he'd lost track. It was a few minutes and one car chase later when Cas spoke again. "I made you my contact because you were the only one I could think of who would care enough to come."
Dean tightened his arm around Castiel's shoulders. "Hey. Of course I came. Nothing could have kept me away."
Cas was quiet for a while. "Thank you."
Dean just squeezed his shoulder again and went back to the movie, watching from the corner of his eye as Castiel's eyes started to blink closed. When Dean was sure he was asleep he shifted over, careful not to wake him. He checked the bandage on the incision site, paranoid that Cas might have started bleeding again during all that. Everything seemed okay and Dean let out a soft sigh of relief, his fingers finding their way up to the pulse point his neck, counting his heartbeats. Dean realized he was afraid to fall asleep. All he could think about was that it had been stupid to do all that, Cas had just gotten out of the hospital. He could start bleeding again. If he closed his eyes Cas could die right next to him and Dean wouldn't know. And he knew that was ridiculous because he knew that if Cas really had been that fragile the hospital would never have let him go, but Dean couldn't stop seeing Cas' eyes rolling back in that hospital bed.
He wrapped his arm back around Castiel and tried to tell his mind to shut up. It hit him that he had never just lain in bed with someone before, at least not with someone he hadn't already had sex with. It felt like a bigger deal to him somehow than if he and Cas really had gone ahead and slept together.
Dean wondered if that meant he was a little screwed up.
The next thing Dean knew was opening his eyes to find the morning sun slanting through the window and Castiel's blue eyes staring right at him. "Hey Cas," he whispered, spotting Sam fast asleep in the opposite bed just in time to keep his voice down.
"Hello, Dean."
"Dude, I cannot be that fascinating."
"I don't judge your hobbies."
Dean grinned and leaned forward to kiss him, careful to be gentle with his sore lip. "You feel okay?"
"I'm fine," he said. "I dreamed I was still in the hospital and none of this had happened."
"You're not and it did. Promise." He stifled a yawn and pushed himself up. "You hungry? Me and Sam'll go get some grub."
"I could eat."
"Any preferences?"
"You can pick. Anything is fine."
"Dude, you put me in charge it's gonna pretty much be all bacon, I'm warning you now." He rolled out of bed, landing on the floor with a loud thump. "Sam!" he bellowed, laughing to himself when he saw his brother startle awake. "We're going on a food run. Dibs on the shower."
***
Dean pulled into park opposite the diner, drumming his fingers against the steering wheel. "Um...Dean? Are we going in?"
"Huh? Yeah, yeah we are...oh shit, I think I forgot my phone, now I can't ask Cas what he really wanted."
"Dean. You woke me up super early for this and I'm hungry now. Why aren't we going in?"
"I wanted the chance to talk to you first."
He saw Sam's eyes go worried. "What's wrong? We're not leaving, are we?"
"What? No, not that I've heard." He let out a deep breath. "Me and Cas are...we're kind of together."
Sam cocked his head to the side, frowning. "Like dating, together?"
"I mean, not like going to the movies and dinner dating."
Sam just rolled his eyes, giving Dean that I'm embarrassed for you look. "Two guys can go to the movies, Dean. You two do it all the time."
"It's different."
"It's really not."
"Whatever." He drummed his fingers against the steering wheel again. "You're taking this pretty well."
Sam shrugged. "I kinda figured, actually."
Dean could only groan. He couldn't figure out how everyone seemed to have known already. "What do you mean, you figured?"
"You were really freaked out at the hospital. I mean, I've only seen you that freaked over Dad before, and it was a different kind of freaked, you know? And besides, you two were always hanging out and you don't bother to do that with people you're not trying to sleep with."
"Jesus, why do people keep saying that? Do you all really think I'm that shallow?"
"Um, yeah?"
"Well, I'm not."
"So you don't wanna sleep with Cas?"
Dean frowned. "Shut up."
"Gotcha." Dean decided to be generous and let Sam enjoy his victory. "You really like him, huh? You never talked to me about any of the other people you wanted to sleep with."
"Yeah. I guess I do," he said, letting out a deep sigh. "It wasn't just that, though. It's kind of...different with Cas, you know?"
Sam snorted. "Tell me about it. I mean, you know his last name. That's a big step for you."
That wasn't the difference he'd meant, but he knew that Sam knew that. And Sam did have a point. "Bitch."
"Jerk," Sam said, grinning.
Dean shook his head. "So you're really this cool about all this?"
Sam shrugged again. "Why wouldn't I be? Just, y'know, don't go at it while I'm in the room."
"Yeah, I know. The Lindsay McIntyre agreement still stands." Dean felt like a thousand pound weight had been thrown off his shoulders. "Thanks, Sam."
"Just don't screw this up, okay? Cas is a good guy and he's been through a lot of crap."
"I'm not gonna screw things up."
"Good." Sam yawned. "Can we go in and get breakfast now?"
"Sure thing. Cas is waiting for his bacon sandwich with that bacon mayonnaise they have now.''
He could hear Sam roll his eyes as they got out of the car. "I'll order for Cas. He's been out of the hospital a day and you're already trying to kill him."
They were almost back at the car with the food when Sam spoke up again. "What're you gonna tell Dad?"
That brought Dean up short. "Tell Dad what?"
Sam let out a long-suffering sigh. "About Cas." He didn't add dummy to the end of that but Dean heard it loud and clear anyway.
"Why would I tell Dad anything? He never cared about who I went out with before." He didn't say that just the thought of having this conversation with his father made his palms sweat.
Sam just gave him a Seriously? look before climbing into the passenger seat. "Just don't screw this up," he said again, staring straight ahead. Neither of them said another word the entire ride back.
***
Castiel woke from a light doze to find Sam and Dean still gone. He reached over for the remote to find something to watch to pass the time and instead found Dean's cellphone forgotten on the bedside table. He felt his heart start to pound as he flipped the phone open and scrolled through the contact list. He stared at the one Dean had labeled DAD for a long, long time, his hands shaking and his throat dry. He was certain that the moment he pressed the button to select it Zachariah would leap out of hiding, with Raphael or maybe even Michael with him, all over them ready to punish him for already breaking his word.
But nothing happened. Castiel swallowed hard and tried to stop his hands from shaking.
DEAN: I have information.
He looked the message again and erased it, shaking his head. No one would ever believe that came from Dean.
Castiel decided to try again.
DEAN: Hve info.
Castiel nodded to himself. That was closer. It still took a long time for him to work up the courage to hit send; he closed his eyes and tried to imagine Dean's reaction if he ever found out Castiel had possessed this information and just didn't divulge it, the way Dean would look at him. He pressed send and almost threw the phone back on the table, like it had been covered in poison.
He felt his heart almost stop when the text alarm chimed. It took him two attempts to flip the phone open.
DAD: go ahead.
Castiel wondered what people had against proper capitalization. Then he frowned, trying to figure out just how Dean would put this.
DEAN: found name. Azazel.
DEAN: set the fire.
Castiel shook his head and erased the second message. That wasn't what Dean would find most important.
DEAN: guy who killed mom
He had to put the phone down and breathe for a few minutes. When the text alert chimed again he swore aloud for the first time in his life because he couldn't imagine what John Winchester could possibly want.
DAD: found this where?
Castiel sighed. Of course.
DEAN: cant say.
DEAN: infos good.
Castiel put the phone back on the table and, to his relief, the text alert didn't go off again.
He hoped Anna and Dean were right about rebellion.
***
Dean strolled in and tossed Cas his sandwich, putting the awkward way the conversation with Sam had ended out of his mind. "There you go. If it's too healthy for you, blame Sam, he ordered it." He reached back into the bag and pulled out two drinks. "I didn't know if you like coffee or orange juice in the morning so I got you both."
"I'll take both."
While everyone unwrapped their food Dean heard his ringtone and dove for his phone; there were only so many people who would call him and most of them were already in the room. "This is Dean, go ahead."
He almost fell over when he heard his father's voice. "Dean, I checked out that lead."
"I...what?"
"It's early yet but it looks promising." Dean couldn't remember hearing his father this excited about anything. "Good work."
"Um...thanks, Dad."
His father hung up and Dean just stared at the phone for a few seconds, trying to figure out what had just happened. He finally got the idea to look at the text log and scrolled up through the messages. Messages he sure as hell knew he hadn't sent.
When he looked over at Castiel the other boy looked away. "You forgot your phone."
"Yeah. Guess I did." He stared at that one message for a long time until he thought he could trust his voice. "This what you were gonna tell me that day?"
Castiel nodded, picking at a stray thread on the blankets. "I'm sorry I didn't say it sooner." His voice went low. "I was scared."
Dean dove onto the bed and kissed Castiel until neither of them could breathe, completely ignoring Sam's outraged cry of, "C'mon Dean, we just talked about this!"
***
Dean slammed his locker door shut, a quick silver flash catching his eye and almost jumped out of his skin when he looked up and saw Mike Kubrick just leaning against the locker wall looking at him, that gaudy silver cross he wore glinting against his chest. "Winchester," he said, nodding. Like he and Dean had become friends all of a sudden.
"Kubrick." The hallway started to thin out, leaving the two of them to stare at each other, wary as two lions who'd stumbled over the same meal. "Where's your other half?"
Kubrick looked away, his lips pulling down into a puzzling frown. "Gordon has some...inner demons I'm no longer comfortable with."
Dean rolled his eyes; it was bad enough Castiel was forcing him to pick up his homework (the guy still had stitches, who did that?), he didn't have the patience put up with this weirdness too. "Why're you talking to me?"
Kubrick chewed on his inner lip for a second. "Haven't seen your boyfriend in a while."
Dean ground his teeth. He didn't get how everyone in the world seemed to have figured out there was something between him and Cas before he did. "Yeah, that happens when you get your spleen taken out."
Kubrick looked down at the floor. "So he'll be all right?"
"Are you here to bust my chops? 'Cause I really don't have the time."
"It's not your sins I'm concerned about now."
Dean narrowed his eyes. "Are...are you trying to convert me or something?"
Kubrick's eyes darted toward Dean for an instant before settling on some vague point on the ceiling. "I need to get right with God."
"Can you just make sense for five seconds?"
He finally managed to look Dean in the eye. "I didn't know it would be like that."
Dean was about to ask what the hell he was on about when he took a close look at Kubrick, at the fading bruise around his eye that Dean realized was fresher than it should be. Like it had only happened a few days ago. Dean felt the world get very, very quiet. "You? You and Walker, the both of you?"
Kubrick nodded and Dean felt his hands ball into fists. He didn't know what kept him from grabbing Kubrick by his hair and slamming his head into the lockers. Probably the sense that Kubrick would just let him do it. "I spoke to my pastor," he said, looking down at the floor again. "He said I needed to make amends. Confess."
And just as Dean was about to tell him what he could do with his confession he remembered something he'd overheard at the hospital. "A nurse told Cas' sister someone in a van had dumped him outside the emergency room."
Kubrick shrugged, as if that of all things embarrassed him. "It was raining."
He'd forgotten that. Dean had a horrified moment to picture Castiel unconscious, shivering and bleeding to death in the rain with Dean on the other side of the wall, completely oblivious. He felt the anger drain out of him. "Thanks."
Kubrick shrugged again. "I tell you, Winchester, I am glad I'm an only child."
Dean felt like the last piece of a puzzle had just clicked into place. "Tell me everything. Everything."
"I'll be forgiven then?"
"I don't know about God, but you and me'll be square."
Kubrick nodded, as if that was the best he could hope for. Dean listened to every word very, very carefully.
***
Dean pressed his switchblade against Zachariah's throat, cutting off the other man midword. "I'll call you back," he said to whoever was on the other line, as cool as if this kind of thing happened all the time, then he dropped the phone to the ground and raised his hands to show they were empty. "Winchester? I'm assuming that's you back there."
It had taken Dean less than three hours to track Zachariah down and only forty five minutes after that to follow him to somewhere isolated enough where there would be no witnesses. The whole time Zachariah never even knew he was there. Dean knew his father would approve. "Next time you hire goons, don't pick ones who believe in hell."
"This doesn't have to be unpleasant."
"It passed that a long time ago." Dean angled the blade in, close enough to scare but not to cut, not yet. "Should've figured you'd've been the one behind things."
"Family squabble. Doesn't involve you."
"You know it does." It blew Dean away that he wasn't even bothering to deny it. "Cas almost died."
That got a reaction - not a guilty one, a quick tense intake of breath, but at least it was something. "That wasn't supposed to happen."
"Yeah. Yeah, I bet. Bet your ass really would be in a sling if that had gone just a little bit worse, huh?" Dean couldn't see it, but he was absolutely sure Zachariah was grinding his teeth. "All that time I was at the hospital, I wondered why the oldest two never put in an appearance and just let Anna handle things, especially since Michael's supposed to be the this big bad head of the family. Figured he'd have to show up at least once, no one could be that big a dick." Dean tilted the knife some more. "Made sense when I heard you were involved. Cas said you handled the family business, so I'm guessing all the calls and official stuff would have to go through you. Let me know when I get something wrong."
"Oh, I'm sure you'll make some kind of dramatic point soon enough," he said, the words betraying him by coming out just a bit too fast.
"You were running interference," Dean said. "You didn't want them to know how bad you'd fucked up so you made sure nothing got back to them. That's why there were never any cops sniffing around. I bet they never even knew something had happened."
"Is this going somewhere---"
"Shut up." Dean was glad his father had taught him how to hold a knife steady no matter how angry he got. "Cas is a minor. It gets out you did this, you're going straight to jail, no passing go. How fucking embarrassing to the family would that be, huh? Especially with all the skeletons camping out in your closets."
He felt Zachariah swallow. "What do you want?"
"Not a matter about what I want. It's what's gonna happen." He leaned in close to Zachariah's ear. He knew he could gut Zachariah like a fish right now but held himself back. "You don't talk to him. You so much as fucking look at him and all this goes on the front page. Can't think your bosses will like that so much."
"That's all you want?"
"I want to put this knife through your eye but that'll only make me feel better, not Cas. And don't think I'm not tempted anyway. You keep away and I'll stay quiet. I ever see you sniffing around, you'll have a camera crew at your front door faster than you can say, 'Holy shit, Dean wasn't kidding.' And then maybe I'll put this through your eye anyway."
"I think we can all live with that."
The desperate edge to his voice was music to Dean. He lowered his knife and backed away. "And have one of those dicks give Cas a call. What kind of fucking family are you?"
Dean slunk back into the shadows before Zachariah could turn around. He bet his father would approve of that, too.
A while later Dean strolled into the hotel, tossing a sack of cheeseburgers into Castiel's lap. "Hey, Cas," he said, plopping down on the bed next to him. "Got some grub."
Cas just continued to stare at his cell phone. "Michael just called," he said, with the same tone of voice people used to describe alien abductions. "He said he hadn't heard I'd been ill and wished me well."
"'Bout time. Eat something."
Castiel nodded, unwrapping one burger and still frowning like he was trying to decipher hieroglyphics. "Where were you?" he finally said, seemingly deciding to put the mystery aside. "I expected you hours ago."
Dean just shrugged. "Had something I needed to take care of." When Castiel frowned at that, that questioning look in his eye, Dean leaned forward and kissed him. That probably wasn't always going to work, but it certainly did now. "Eat or I'll feed you."
A mischievous grin flashed across his face. "That doesn't sound so terrible," he said, color creeping across his cheeks.
"Cas, you cannot get better fast enough," Dean said, bending down to kiss him again. Dinner could wait a little while longer.
-On to Part 9-
-Back to Masterpost-
-Back to Part 7-
Author: misachan
Artist: slinkymilinky (Link to Art Master Post)
Word Count: 4900
Characters/Pairings: Dean/Castiel, Dean/Anna, Sam, Uriel, Zachariah
Warnings: Violence (including violence between family members), drug use (nothing stronger than pot), underage drinking (nothing harder than beer), sex between an 18 and 17-year-old, sexuality angst
Summary: Another day, another town; when their bounty hunter father enrolls he and Sam in yet another school Dean thinks this will just be another town he'll forget five minutes after he leaves it. Things get more interesting when Sam befriends a classmate of Dean's and the lonely boy with the strange name and stranger family slowly gets under Dean's skin. Their new friendship gets complicated when it becomes clear that Castiel's brothers aren't just strange, they're dangerous, and the secrets they keep and the sins they bury have a lot to do with Dean. It would all be bad enough even without Dean starting to worry that maybe friendship isn't all he wants.
A Dean/Castiel high school love story with fist fights, movie nights, make outs, broken hearts, hospital vigils and a steamed up hotel shower.
They said Cas would be sprung in four days but kept him one extra, wanting to be careful since to hear the doctors talk any little infection could make him drop dead. Dean didn't know how many of them really believed Anna's little engaged lie, but to Dean's relief they all seemed willing to run with it. They were even willing to release Castiel into her custody, which in reality was Dean's custody since she could only stick around so much longer. And it was a good thing too, because Dean didn't know how long he could deal with Cas being out of his sight right then.
He sat through the doctors talking them through taking care of the stitches, how to keep the incision clean, all the things Dean had known how to do since he was a little kid. It seemed like it took a thousand years before the doctors would finally let him go, and the entire time Dean was waiting for Michael to show up, or Raphael, one of them to appear and say that no, Cas had to go with them.
It never happened though, and Dean almost couldn't believe it when they were finally able to ease Castiel into the Impala's passenger seat, Sam stretching out in the back without complaint. Cas was out like a light almost immediately and Dean eased out of the spot, taking the long way back to make sure he kept to the smoothest roads.
At every red light he patted the key card in his pocket to make sure it was still there. He didn't know what kind of money deacons made but Anna had shelled out for a month at one of the nicer hotel suites - not a four star anything, just one of the efficiency places people stayed in when traveling on business - because she didn't want, as she put it, "my brother recovering in a flop house." She'd said her goodbyes that morning when the doctors finally stopped dithering over whether to keep him one more day; she'd slipped the card into his pocket, wrapped in a note that read Break his heart again and I'll skin you alive. Dean hoped she followed through on that, too.
Once they were there he and Sam prodded Cas out of the car and into the room, dropping him onto a bed that was so comfortable Dean frankly wondered if he'd be able to sleep on it. Cas didn't seem to have any trouble, though; as soon as they lay him down he stretched out like a cat, or as much as cat could with stitches in his side, anyway. "I gotta drop Sam off at his buddy's, Cas. You think you can avoid dropping dead if I leave you alone for five minutes?"
"I think I can manage," he said, his eyes closed and looking like the very picture of bliss. "This bed is much better than the one at the hospital."
"I bet. When I get back we'll get some food in you that's better than at the hospital, too. Pizza sound good?"
"Anything you get will be fine."
"Actually, Dean," Sam piped up, "I could probably walk from here. Trevor's actually closer now than he was from the old place."
"You sure? It's dark already."
"Yeah, it's not that dark yet. And the neighborhood's way better."
"If you're cool with it. Call me when you get there, and I mean the second you walk in the door."
Sam rolled his eyes. "Yes, mom," he said, shouldering his backpack.
Dean threw the spare key card at him. "Here, pest, before I decide not to let you in. You gonna need a ride back?"
"Nah, Trevor's mom can drive me. I'm good."
Dean didn't miss the grateful look Cas gave Sam as he left or the little nod Sam gave him in return, he just chose not think too hard about it. Dean stretched out next to him, still a little amazed he was in a hotel nice enough to have beds big enough for two people to lie down on. "What do you want on your pizza, Cas?" he said, picking up the bedside phone.
"Mushrooms and extra cheese," he said, almost shyly.
"Dude. Gross." Dean grinned at the annoyed glare Cas gave him. "You'll have to have your own," he said, placing the order.
After the food came Dean flipped through the channels, stopping when an explosion caught his eye. "Hey, Cas," he said, nudging his shoulder. "We watch this one during the last Statham-athon?"
Castiel studied the screen. "I don't believe so."
"Cool. This one's just starting. It's one of his drives-stuff ones, I know they're not your favorite."
"I like them too," Castiel said, settling back against the pillows.
Midway through the movie the food was long gone and Dean felt full and sleepy and happier than he had in a good long time. "You feel okay? Anything hurt?"
"For the thousandth time, no. I'm sore, that's all."
"Just checking. There any of the soda left?"
"There should be another bottle."
"Toss it over here, then."
"Get it yourself. I'm comfortable."
Dean rolled his eyes. "Lazy pain in the ass." Not that Dean was getting up either, instead reaching over him to grab the bottle, careful to not put pressure on Castiel's incision.
He never got the soda. As he hovered over Cas trying to reach he felt Castiel take a deep breath. Dean looked down, worried that he'd hurt him, but before he could ask anything Castiel leaned up on one elbow and kissed him, a much more careful kiss than the first time. When Cas pulled back Dean saw terror bright in his eyes and knew it was his fault it was there. "You said I could do that," he whispered, looking up at Dean like he was waiting for judgment.
"Yeah, I did," Dean said, stroking his thumb lightly along the bruise on his cheek. "Didn't know you'd heard me."
"I wasn't sure it was real. Dean, I...."
Dean kissed him before he could say another word and he felt the soft moan Cas let out wash through him like a drug. Castiel's lips parted and Dean deepened the kiss, keeping it slow and careful because he knew Cas' lip was still sore and swollen from the fight. He felt Castiel reach up to trace one hand down his jaw, just the tips of his fingers light along his jaw line. This time Dean was the one to pull back, spending a moment to take in Castiel lying there this flushed and his eyes this wide. He'd dreamed about making Cas look like that. "You okay?"
Castiel nodded. "I didn't mean it when I said we shouldn't be friends anymore," he said, still a little breathless.
"Figured that, Cas," Dean said, nuzzling along his neck. "Does kissing like that hurt? With your lip still busted up, I mean?"
"A little," Cas admitted. "That doesn't mean I want to stop," he added quickly, like he thought Dean was just going to say the hell with it, then.
Dean just grinned. "Plenty of stuff we can still do." Before Cas could ask what he meant by that Dean levered himself over Castiel, careful to keep his weight off of him. He started at Castiel's hairline and worked his way down, very, very slowly, tracing along the curve of his temple, down the slope of his cheek. When he trailed his tongue along Cas' upper lip Dean felt his breath shudder and smiled to himself. "You tell me the second something hurts, okay?" Castiel nodded and Dean went back to work, kissing his way down Cas' neck and licking his way back up, lingering along the pulse point and feeling Castiel's heart start to race faster. "Dean," he breathed, tipping his chin up as if he wanted to encourage Dean to do that again.
Dean was only too happy to oblige. "I like the way you say that," he admitted, scraping his teeth very, very lighting over his skin.
"Do you?" Dean could feel the vibration of that raspy voice against this lips. "I like saying it." Cas' hands reached up his arms, nails digging in whenever Dean found a good spot and Dean had dreamed about this but the reality was so much better. This was real and Dean could take as much time as he wanted, he could stretch every second so he could savor every moan and little breathy flutter.
Cas pressed up against him when Dean tongued the hollow of this throat and Dean had to close his eyes to gather himself for a second. "Jesus, Cas," he whispered, nibbling on his earlobe. "That's not helping." He could actually feel Castiel smirk at that. Cas moaned again when Dean licked along the curve of his collarbone, pressing against Dean again, but this time Dean felt him tense. Dean looked up too fast for Castiel to hide the pained wince. "Okay, that's enough," he said, rolling off of him. Cas groaned and Dean wrapped one arm around him. "Hey, I'm not exactly thrilled about it either," Dean said, making sure Castiel could feel how much Dean didn't want to stop just them. "We'll have plenty of time when you're healed up."
"I feel fine," Cas said with an annoyed little huff.
"You're one big bruise and you're full of stitches. We're gonna take things a little slow for a while." He rolled to his back, letting Castiel's head rest in the crook of his arm. "Rest up, okay? You've kind of had a day."
"I'm fine," Castiel insisted, snuggling next to Dean and full-on pouting. Dean ignored it and tried to figure out what had happened in the movie since he'd lost track. It was a few minutes and one car chase later when Cas spoke again. "I made you my contact because you were the only one I could think of who would care enough to come."
Dean tightened his arm around Castiel's shoulders. "Hey. Of course I came. Nothing could have kept me away."
Cas was quiet for a while. "Thank you."
Dean just squeezed his shoulder again and went back to the movie, watching from the corner of his eye as Castiel's eyes started to blink closed. When Dean was sure he was asleep he shifted over, careful not to wake him. He checked the bandage on the incision site, paranoid that Cas might have started bleeding again during all that. Everything seemed okay and Dean let out a soft sigh of relief, his fingers finding their way up to the pulse point his neck, counting his heartbeats. Dean realized he was afraid to fall asleep. All he could think about was that it had been stupid to do all that, Cas had just gotten out of the hospital. He could start bleeding again. If he closed his eyes Cas could die right next to him and Dean wouldn't know. And he knew that was ridiculous because he knew that if Cas really had been that fragile the hospital would never have let him go, but Dean couldn't stop seeing Cas' eyes rolling back in that hospital bed.
He wrapped his arm back around Castiel and tried to tell his mind to shut up. It hit him that he had never just lain in bed with someone before, at least not with someone he hadn't already had sex with. It felt like a bigger deal to him somehow than if he and Cas really had gone ahead and slept together.
Dean wondered if that meant he was a little screwed up.
The next thing Dean knew was opening his eyes to find the morning sun slanting through the window and Castiel's blue eyes staring right at him. "Hey Cas," he whispered, spotting Sam fast asleep in the opposite bed just in time to keep his voice down.
"Hello, Dean."
"Dude, I cannot be that fascinating."
"I don't judge your hobbies."
Dean grinned and leaned forward to kiss him, careful to be gentle with his sore lip. "You feel okay?"
"I'm fine," he said. "I dreamed I was still in the hospital and none of this had happened."
"You're not and it did. Promise." He stifled a yawn and pushed himself up. "You hungry? Me and Sam'll go get some grub."
"I could eat."
"Any preferences?"
"You can pick. Anything is fine."
"Dude, you put me in charge it's gonna pretty much be all bacon, I'm warning you now." He rolled out of bed, landing on the floor with a loud thump. "Sam!" he bellowed, laughing to himself when he saw his brother startle awake. "We're going on a food run. Dibs on the shower."
***
Dean pulled into park opposite the diner, drumming his fingers against the steering wheel. "Um...Dean? Are we going in?"
"Huh? Yeah, yeah we are...oh shit, I think I forgot my phone, now I can't ask Cas what he really wanted."
"Dean. You woke me up super early for this and I'm hungry now. Why aren't we going in?"
"I wanted the chance to talk to you first."
He saw Sam's eyes go worried. "What's wrong? We're not leaving, are we?"
"What? No, not that I've heard." He let out a deep breath. "Me and Cas are...we're kind of together."
Sam cocked his head to the side, frowning. "Like dating, together?"
"I mean, not like going to the movies and dinner dating."
Sam just rolled his eyes, giving Dean that I'm embarrassed for you look. "Two guys can go to the movies, Dean. You two do it all the time."
"It's different."
"It's really not."
"Whatever." He drummed his fingers against the steering wheel again. "You're taking this pretty well."
Sam shrugged. "I kinda figured, actually."
Dean could only groan. He couldn't figure out how everyone seemed to have known already. "What do you mean, you figured?"
"You were really freaked out at the hospital. I mean, I've only seen you that freaked over Dad before, and it was a different kind of freaked, you know? And besides, you two were always hanging out and you don't bother to do that with people you're not trying to sleep with."
"Jesus, why do people keep saying that? Do you all really think I'm that shallow?"
"Um, yeah?"
"Well, I'm not."
"So you don't wanna sleep with Cas?"
Dean frowned. "Shut up."
"Gotcha." Dean decided to be generous and let Sam enjoy his victory. "You really like him, huh? You never talked to me about any of the other people you wanted to sleep with."
"Yeah. I guess I do," he said, letting out a deep sigh. "It wasn't just that, though. It's kind of...different with Cas, you know?"
Sam snorted. "Tell me about it. I mean, you know his last name. That's a big step for you."
That wasn't the difference he'd meant, but he knew that Sam knew that. And Sam did have a point. "Bitch."
"Jerk," Sam said, grinning.
Dean shook his head. "So you're really this cool about all this?"
Sam shrugged again. "Why wouldn't I be? Just, y'know, don't go at it while I'm in the room."
"Yeah, I know. The Lindsay McIntyre agreement still stands." Dean felt like a thousand pound weight had been thrown off his shoulders. "Thanks, Sam."
"Just don't screw this up, okay? Cas is a good guy and he's been through a lot of crap."
"I'm not gonna screw things up."
"Good." Sam yawned. "Can we go in and get breakfast now?"
"Sure thing. Cas is waiting for his bacon sandwich with that bacon mayonnaise they have now.''
He could hear Sam roll his eyes as they got out of the car. "I'll order for Cas. He's been out of the hospital a day and you're already trying to kill him."
They were almost back at the car with the food when Sam spoke up again. "What're you gonna tell Dad?"
That brought Dean up short. "Tell Dad what?"
Sam let out a long-suffering sigh. "About Cas." He didn't add dummy to the end of that but Dean heard it loud and clear anyway.
"Why would I tell Dad anything? He never cared about who I went out with before." He didn't say that just the thought of having this conversation with his father made his palms sweat.
Sam just gave him a Seriously? look before climbing into the passenger seat. "Just don't screw this up," he said again, staring straight ahead. Neither of them said another word the entire ride back.
***
Castiel woke from a light doze to find Sam and Dean still gone. He reached over for the remote to find something to watch to pass the time and instead found Dean's cellphone forgotten on the bedside table. He felt his heart start to pound as he flipped the phone open and scrolled through the contact list. He stared at the one Dean had labeled DAD for a long, long time, his hands shaking and his throat dry. He was certain that the moment he pressed the button to select it Zachariah would leap out of hiding, with Raphael or maybe even Michael with him, all over them ready to punish him for already breaking his word.
But nothing happened. Castiel swallowed hard and tried to stop his hands from shaking.
DEAN: I have information.
He looked the message again and erased it, shaking his head. No one would ever believe that came from Dean.
Castiel decided to try again.
DEAN: Hve info.
Castiel nodded to himself. That was closer. It still took a long time for him to work up the courage to hit send; he closed his eyes and tried to imagine Dean's reaction if he ever found out Castiel had possessed this information and just didn't divulge it, the way Dean would look at him. He pressed send and almost threw the phone back on the table, like it had been covered in poison.
He felt his heart almost stop when the text alarm chimed. It took him two attempts to flip the phone open.
DAD: go ahead.
Castiel wondered what people had against proper capitalization. Then he frowned, trying to figure out just how Dean would put this.
DEAN: found name. Azazel.
DEAN: set the fire.
Castiel shook his head and erased the second message. That wasn't what Dean would find most important.
DEAN: guy who killed mom
He had to put the phone down and breathe for a few minutes. When the text alert chimed again he swore aloud for the first time in his life because he couldn't imagine what John Winchester could possibly want.
DAD: found this where?
Castiel sighed. Of course.
DEAN: cant say.
DEAN: infos good.
Castiel put the phone back on the table and, to his relief, the text alert didn't go off again.
He hoped Anna and Dean were right about rebellion.
***
Dean strolled in and tossed Cas his sandwich, putting the awkward way the conversation with Sam had ended out of his mind. "There you go. If it's too healthy for you, blame Sam, he ordered it." He reached back into the bag and pulled out two drinks. "I didn't know if you like coffee or orange juice in the morning so I got you both."
"I'll take both."
While everyone unwrapped their food Dean heard his ringtone and dove for his phone; there were only so many people who would call him and most of them were already in the room. "This is Dean, go ahead."
He almost fell over when he heard his father's voice. "Dean, I checked out that lead."
"I...what?"
"It's early yet but it looks promising." Dean couldn't remember hearing his father this excited about anything. "Good work."
"Um...thanks, Dad."
His father hung up and Dean just stared at the phone for a few seconds, trying to figure out what had just happened. He finally got the idea to look at the text log and scrolled up through the messages. Messages he sure as hell knew he hadn't sent.
When he looked over at Castiel the other boy looked away. "You forgot your phone."
"Yeah. Guess I did." He stared at that one message for a long time until he thought he could trust his voice. "This what you were gonna tell me that day?"
Castiel nodded, picking at a stray thread on the blankets. "I'm sorry I didn't say it sooner." His voice went low. "I was scared."
Dean dove onto the bed and kissed Castiel until neither of them could breathe, completely ignoring Sam's outraged cry of, "C'mon Dean, we just talked about this!"
***
Dean slammed his locker door shut, a quick silver flash catching his eye and almost jumped out of his skin when he looked up and saw Mike Kubrick just leaning against the locker wall looking at him, that gaudy silver cross he wore glinting against his chest. "Winchester," he said, nodding. Like he and Dean had become friends all of a sudden.
"Kubrick." The hallway started to thin out, leaving the two of them to stare at each other, wary as two lions who'd stumbled over the same meal. "Where's your other half?"
Kubrick looked away, his lips pulling down into a puzzling frown. "Gordon has some...inner demons I'm no longer comfortable with."
Dean rolled his eyes; it was bad enough Castiel was forcing him to pick up his homework (the guy still had stitches, who did that?), he didn't have the patience put up with this weirdness too. "Why're you talking to me?"
Kubrick chewed on his inner lip for a second. "Haven't seen your boyfriend in a while."
Dean ground his teeth. He didn't get how everyone in the world seemed to have figured out there was something between him and Cas before he did. "Yeah, that happens when you get your spleen taken out."
Kubrick looked down at the floor. "So he'll be all right?"
"Are you here to bust my chops? 'Cause I really don't have the time."
"It's not your sins I'm concerned about now."
Dean narrowed his eyes. "Are...are you trying to convert me or something?"
Kubrick's eyes darted toward Dean for an instant before settling on some vague point on the ceiling. "I need to get right with God."
"Can you just make sense for five seconds?"
He finally managed to look Dean in the eye. "I didn't know it would be like that."
Dean was about to ask what the hell he was on about when he took a close look at Kubrick, at the fading bruise around his eye that Dean realized was fresher than it should be. Like it had only happened a few days ago. Dean felt the world get very, very quiet. "You? You and Walker, the both of you?"
Kubrick nodded and Dean felt his hands ball into fists. He didn't know what kept him from grabbing Kubrick by his hair and slamming his head into the lockers. Probably the sense that Kubrick would just let him do it. "I spoke to my pastor," he said, looking down at the floor again. "He said I needed to make amends. Confess."
And just as Dean was about to tell him what he could do with his confession he remembered something he'd overheard at the hospital. "A nurse told Cas' sister someone in a van had dumped him outside the emergency room."
Kubrick shrugged, as if that of all things embarrassed him. "It was raining."
He'd forgotten that. Dean had a horrified moment to picture Castiel unconscious, shivering and bleeding to death in the rain with Dean on the other side of the wall, completely oblivious. He felt the anger drain out of him. "Thanks."
Kubrick shrugged again. "I tell you, Winchester, I am glad I'm an only child."
Dean felt like the last piece of a puzzle had just clicked into place. "Tell me everything. Everything."
"I'll be forgiven then?"
"I don't know about God, but you and me'll be square."
Kubrick nodded, as if that was the best he could hope for. Dean listened to every word very, very carefully.
***
Dean pressed his switchblade against Zachariah's throat, cutting off the other man midword. "I'll call you back," he said to whoever was on the other line, as cool as if this kind of thing happened all the time, then he dropped the phone to the ground and raised his hands to show they were empty. "Winchester? I'm assuming that's you back there."
It had taken Dean less than three hours to track Zachariah down and only forty five minutes after that to follow him to somewhere isolated enough where there would be no witnesses. The whole time Zachariah never even knew he was there. Dean knew his father would approve. "Next time you hire goons, don't pick ones who believe in hell."
"This doesn't have to be unpleasant."
"It passed that a long time ago." Dean angled the blade in, close enough to scare but not to cut, not yet. "Should've figured you'd've been the one behind things."
"Family squabble. Doesn't involve you."
"You know it does." It blew Dean away that he wasn't even bothering to deny it. "Cas almost died."
That got a reaction - not a guilty one, a quick tense intake of breath, but at least it was something. "That wasn't supposed to happen."
"Yeah. Yeah, I bet. Bet your ass really would be in a sling if that had gone just a little bit worse, huh?" Dean couldn't see it, but he was absolutely sure Zachariah was grinding his teeth. "All that time I was at the hospital, I wondered why the oldest two never put in an appearance and just let Anna handle things, especially since Michael's supposed to be the this big bad head of the family. Figured he'd have to show up at least once, no one could be that big a dick." Dean tilted the knife some more. "Made sense when I heard you were involved. Cas said you handled the family business, so I'm guessing all the calls and official stuff would have to go through you. Let me know when I get something wrong."
"Oh, I'm sure you'll make some kind of dramatic point soon enough," he said, the words betraying him by coming out just a bit too fast.
"You were running interference," Dean said. "You didn't want them to know how bad you'd fucked up so you made sure nothing got back to them. That's why there were never any cops sniffing around. I bet they never even knew something had happened."
"Is this going somewhere---"
"Shut up." Dean was glad his father had taught him how to hold a knife steady no matter how angry he got. "Cas is a minor. It gets out you did this, you're going straight to jail, no passing go. How fucking embarrassing to the family would that be, huh? Especially with all the skeletons camping out in your closets."
He felt Zachariah swallow. "What do you want?"
"Not a matter about what I want. It's what's gonna happen." He leaned in close to Zachariah's ear. He knew he could gut Zachariah like a fish right now but held himself back. "You don't talk to him. You so much as fucking look at him and all this goes on the front page. Can't think your bosses will like that so much."
"That's all you want?"
"I want to put this knife through your eye but that'll only make me feel better, not Cas. And don't think I'm not tempted anyway. You keep away and I'll stay quiet. I ever see you sniffing around, you'll have a camera crew at your front door faster than you can say, 'Holy shit, Dean wasn't kidding.' And then maybe I'll put this through your eye anyway."
"I think we can all live with that."
The desperate edge to his voice was music to Dean. He lowered his knife and backed away. "And have one of those dicks give Cas a call. What kind of fucking family are you?"
Dean slunk back into the shadows before Zachariah could turn around. He bet his father would approve of that, too.
A while later Dean strolled into the hotel, tossing a sack of cheeseburgers into Castiel's lap. "Hey, Cas," he said, plopping down on the bed next to him. "Got some grub."
Cas just continued to stare at his cell phone. "Michael just called," he said, with the same tone of voice people used to describe alien abductions. "He said he hadn't heard I'd been ill and wished me well."
"'Bout time. Eat something."
Castiel nodded, unwrapping one burger and still frowning like he was trying to decipher hieroglyphics. "Where were you?" he finally said, seemingly deciding to put the mystery aside. "I expected you hours ago."
Dean just shrugged. "Had something I needed to take care of." When Castiel frowned at that, that questioning look in his eye, Dean leaned forward and kissed him. That probably wasn't always going to work, but it certainly did now. "Eat or I'll feed you."
A mischievous grin flashed across his face. "That doesn't sound so terrible," he said, color creeping across his cheeks.
"Cas, you cannot get better fast enough," Dean said, bending down to kiss him again. Dinner could wait a little while longer.
-On to Part 9-
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