Fic: Bed Games
This is actually an old fic that I'm just putting up on lj.
Title: Bed Games
Summary: Hermione listens in while Ron and Harry do some... experimenting.
Rating: PG-13 to be safe.
"OW! Ron, don't do it that way! It hurts!" Hermione paused outside her friend's dorm room when she heard Harry's voice. "Damn, Ron! Pull it out a little bit, and wiggle it some"
"It isn't my fault that hole is there," Ron replied. "You should have listened to me in the first place, I've seen my mum and dad do it loads of times."
"I'm telling you, the Muggle way is easier. I may not have learned much from the Dursleys, but they did teach me this."
"Harry, if the house elves can do it, so can we," Ron's voice was getting louder.
"The house elves do it the Muggle way!" Harry matched Ron's volume, then his pitch suddenly got higher, "Ron, that's not the right spot. Jiggle it a bit... ah, much better."
"I know the first time is difficult for everyone, but man, this is ridiculous, who knew it was so hard."
"At least I don't need a book to figure it out when it's done without magic," Harry spat back.
"Mum and dad make it look so easy." Hermione heard the defeat in Ron's voice.
"I have an idea! What if we squeeze yours this way, and move mine over to the right..."
Ron interrupted, "Move your leg, I can't see right. Thanks, you know, I think that will work."
"It's not in yet. Stop! That hurts!"
"I think I can tell when it's in, Harry, you were the one who wanted to be on the bottom. Now isn't the time for second thoughts."
"Move your wand a little, it's in the way!"
"If my wand wasn't there, you'd be a mile away."
"This never happened when I did it in Dudley's room," Harry grumbled.
"Just slide it in. That's it..." **CRASH**
Hermione rapped lightly on the door and said, "Um, guys, are you okay?"
"HERMIONE! Get in here, we need your help!" said the two boys in unison.
Then Harry said, "We should have asked for her help to begin with, she's much better at these things than we are."
Hermione's face grew bright red. "What do you mean by that?" she demanded.
"Please, Hermione, we'll do anything for you to help us in this," Ron pleaded weakly through the door. "Just come in, please."
Well, they asked for it. She came in and saw the two boys in a heap on top of Harry's broken four poster bed. "What are you doing?" she asked after assuring herself they were fully robed.
The two boys responded at once,
"Ron had this wonderful idea to make our own beds today using magic."
"Harry wanted to know what we could do to help out Dobby in our dorm."
Then she noticed a book on the desk to her right, Common Household Chores Made Easy Through Magic. "Oh, honestly!" She helped Harry and Ron up and took out her wand, "Somnus Reparo."
Ron hit himself on the head as the bed put itself back together again, and the sheets tucked themselves in. "Thanks Hermione."
Harry started to speak, "It's just that we were trying to..."
Hermione held up her hand. "I don't want to know, I just don't want to know."
Title: Bed Games
Summary: Hermione listens in while Ron and Harry do some... experimenting.
Rating: PG-13 to be safe.
"OW! Ron, don't do it that way! It hurts!" Hermione paused outside her friend's dorm room when she heard Harry's voice. "Damn, Ron! Pull it out a little bit, and wiggle it some"
"It isn't my fault that hole is there," Ron replied. "You should have listened to me in the first place, I've seen my mum and dad do it loads of times."
"I'm telling you, the Muggle way is easier. I may not have learned much from the Dursleys, but they did teach me this."
"Harry, if the house elves can do it, so can we," Ron's voice was getting louder.
"The house elves do it the Muggle way!" Harry matched Ron's volume, then his pitch suddenly got higher, "Ron, that's not the right spot. Jiggle it a bit... ah, much better."
"I know the first time is difficult for everyone, but man, this is ridiculous, who knew it was so hard."
"At least I don't need a book to figure it out when it's done without magic," Harry spat back.
"Mum and dad make it look so easy." Hermione heard the defeat in Ron's voice.
"I have an idea! What if we squeeze yours this way, and move mine over to the right..."
Ron interrupted, "Move your leg, I can't see right. Thanks, you know, I think that will work."
"It's not in yet. Stop! That hurts!"
"I think I can tell when it's in, Harry, you were the one who wanted to be on the bottom. Now isn't the time for second thoughts."
"Move your wand a little, it's in the way!"
"If my wand wasn't there, you'd be a mile away."
"This never happened when I did it in Dudley's room," Harry grumbled.
"Just slide it in. That's it..." **CRASH**
Hermione rapped lightly on the door and said, "Um, guys, are you okay?"
"HERMIONE! Get in here, we need your help!" said the two boys in unison.
Then Harry said, "We should have asked for her help to begin with, she's much better at these things than we are."
Hermione's face grew bright red. "What do you mean by that?" she demanded.
"Please, Hermione, we'll do anything for you to help us in this," Ron pleaded weakly through the door. "Just come in, please."
Well, they asked for it. She came in and saw the two boys in a heap on top of Harry's broken four poster bed. "What are you doing?" she asked after assuring herself they were fully robed.
The two boys responded at once,
"Ron had this wonderful idea to make our own beds today using magic."
"Harry wanted to know what we could do to help out Dobby in our dorm."
Then she noticed a book on the desk to her right, Common Household Chores Made Easy Through Magic. "Oh, honestly!" She helped Harry and Ron up and took out her wand, "Somnus Reparo."
Ron hit himself on the head as the bed put itself back together again, and the sheets tucked themselves in. "Thanks Hermione."
Harry started to speak, "It's just that we were trying to..."
Hermione held up her hand. "I don't want to know, I just don't want to know."