(Untitled)

[remindmeof_me]

You know, if anyone ever asked Adrian Shephard when he was a kid whether he ever thought he'd find himself standing behind a bar somewhere with a coffee can and three pebbles in one hand and a loaded watergun in the other, facing a blue-mottled puppy that looked like a Christmas ham that grew eyes and legs, and shouting "NO" and squirting it in the

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[hawkeyed_riza]

...That is very possibly the ugliest chimera Hawkeye has ever seen.

Hayate, at her feet, stiffens and barks, hackles rising. "Quiet, Hayate," she says, and the dog hushes. (Hawkeye doesn't need to look down to know that he's still eyeing the chimera warily.)

"Sorry," she says to the man, because she might be dubious too -- not to mention still uncomfortable with the entire idea of this place -- but there's no need to be rude.

[remindmeof_me]

The eyeball dog freezes in place at the sound before whipping around to blink in Hayate's direction. (It's kind of hard to miss. The blink process involves a ring of membrane sliding in from the edges to cover all the eyes at once.)

"Mrrr-"

"NO, Mrs. Wilson," Shephard interrupts, and hits the little creature in the side with a stream of water. It yelps sharply and shakes itself off; Adrian sighs. "That's all right, ma'am," he says. "Dogs know when shit ain't right."

[hawkeyed_riza]

Mrs. Wilson?

...Never mind.

"Sit," says Hawkeye, just in case, with a glance down for good measure -- Hayate sits immediately, without taking his attention from Shephard's creature -- before she looks back at the man.

Well, he said it, not her, which means it's okay to say: "What is that?"

[remindmeof_me]

"'s called a houndeye, ma'am," says Shephard. The woman's uniform isn't one he recognizes, but that doesn't mean a damn thing around here; she's in the service somewhere, and that's all that matters. "Comes from a world called Xen. Couldn't git her to stop followin' me on a hunt, 'n I don't hold with shootin' puppies if there ain't no other way, so I reckoned I'd better git her trained'n housebroken soon as possible."

The... houndeye... sits and turns to scratch at the wet spot with its now-available hind leg.

[tyler_marlocke]

...

"Mr. Shephard?"

[remindmeof_me]

The mottled puppy stands up on its hind leg- there's only the one- and peers at the newcomer.

"Hey there, Tyler," says Shephard. "Uh. Bet you're wonderin' 'bout Mrs. Wilson here."

[tyler_marlocke]

...It looks like something the Elevator Fiend would have given birth to.

"...I know I can't throw any stones, cause of Winston but..."

Seriously, weirdest damn pet ever.

[remindmeof_me]

"Went huntin' the other day, shot me a bullsquid," says Shephard. "This li'l girl'n her family came 'round to try'n steal some of the meat. I ran 'em off but this one just kept comin' back so I figured, what the hell, might as well see if I c'n tame her."

[findthegeck]

It sounds like someone's trying to train a dog. It even looks like that if you squint really hard.

Eventually she has to come up to Adrian and ask, "Are you teaching it to fetch as well?"

[remindmeof_me]

"Gonna do that eventually," says Shephard. "Right now the big thing is gettin' her not to bark out of turn 'fore she gits old enough to git nasty. Ain't that right, Mrs. Wilson?"

It yips and hop-dances from one foreleg to the other a few times in acknowledgment. Shephard grins and digs a bit of jerky out of one pocket to toss its way.

[findthegeck]

"Mrs Wilson, huh?" She has to see this - how, she wonders, does it eat?

"So, next question - what is it, exactly? I'm guessing it's not some rare breed of dog..."

It's strangely cute, though.

[remindmeof_me]

"Yep. Ms. Vance tol' me the markings'd be darker'n clearer if she was male," Shephard says. "She's a houndeye. Little fuckers're from a world called Xen, 'n they were some of the critters that came runnin' across to Earth when the fuckin' Black Mesa Disaster Factory tore space and time a new goddamn asshole. Been breedin' in the wilderness ever since."

As for the eating question, Mrs. Wilson drops her front down on top of the jerky as soon as it hits the ground. A few om nom nom noises later she stands up, and while the jerky is gone, there's a few bits of something falling from her underside between her front legs.