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[inseaweedswim]

Sienna
Isegrim



Sienna lingered near the entrance of the cafeteria, pondering if she should go in or not. After that whole...incident of revelation that she'd disappointed Sei (and he didn't even know it! That somehow made it so much more worse.), her appetite had all but flown out the window. Sometimes she wouldn't get to bed until the sun showed signs of life, but all those hours of quiet, of sitting right next to the boy all her guilt was stemming from... It was on more than one occassion that Sienna would retreat to her room once Sei was asleep.

It wasn't a very welcoming room.

Why couldn't they love whoever they wanted to? Why did they have to have their feelings removed? Why did their goddess of love prohibit said love from those she'd blessed? Why?

Did the "why" even matter? They were raised in this environment, they should've adhered to the rules they grew up with, and yet.

And yet Sienna couldn't help but feel that they were being cheated, somehow.

But it's not like that really mattered, did it? The rules were there and she knew the consequences and yet she let Sei go on with it anyway. Instead of protecting him, instead of making good use of the trust he put in her.

Sienna prided herself on being independant. But what good was that if she couldn't be dependable?

She couldn't even muster up the energy to sigh. Turning around, she walked right into someone's body and uncharacteristically stumbled backwards. Not eating will do that to you!

"S-Sorry..." Sienna mumbled, unwilling to look at the other person. And she was so good at keeping away from people if she tried!

Isegrim had been on his way to the cafeteria as well, though in a considerably better mood than Sienna, which wasn't saying much. Everything felt as thought it was unraveling. Mike seemed like she was at the end of her rope, Sei and Marcine had brought up the very thing most of the guardians tried to avoid thinking about, Lee had, well, disappointed him? Done something incredibly stupid? Or had he just made a mistake? The blonde still wasn't sure how he felt about Lee at the moment. And Sienna...

As if on cue, Isegrim ran into someone wearing an awful lot of black. Sienna? "Excuse me," he murmured before checking for sure who it was. His stomach, as it had been doing quite a bit in the past few days, lurched. "Hey, Sienna," Isegrim sighed, his voice sounding small. He was fairly sure she didn't want to see or talk to him at the moment. Hopefully the encounter wouldn't be too strange.

Isegrim. She blinked up wearily at him. "Hi."

Well, he supposed ,that had answered that question. When he'd asked her if she was alright, she had flat out lied to him, so he felt little like asking again. "Getting something to eat?" Isegrim hoped so; she looked rather weak.

Her eyes went back down to the carpet. "Not hungry." Well, it was true. Sort of.

"Where are you off to, then?" he continued, his expression looking more and more concerned with each word she spoke. Her behavior was perfectly normal, Isegrim reminded himself. Stop worrying so much! "Training?"

"Training..." she echoed thoughtfully. Training. Sure? "Sure." Yes? "Yes."

Training. Sure. Yes. "Sienna?" he sighed, wondering whether he should ask again. Even if he didn't want to hear the answer, he might as well try. "Are you sure you're alright?"

Sienna visibly cringed and opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Would she lie to him again?

He knew she was close to Sei and he knew what was bothering her. It was just upsetting to be lied to, even if he understood why she was doing it. Didn't she know that he wouldn't press her? Isegrim had always tried to let people deal with things in their own way, let them deal with their problems on their own. He knew sometimes it made him seem stand-offish, but people usually needed to solve their own problems. He just... he just wanted to hear Sienna tell him that, no, she wasn't alright. He didn't need to be the one she told her problems to, he just wanted to know there was a problem to be told about.

"... I let him down," she said, brows scrunching together, shoulders slumping. Oh, guilt guilt guilt, you're an ugly thing. "It's my fault."

"How could this be your fault?" Isegrim sighed, putting his hands in his pockets. He started walking to the side of the hallway so they weren't in plain view carrying on a conversation. Sienna... she was too hard on herself.

She trailed after him, almost as if she had a point to prove. "I knew... I knew about them. I didn't try to stop him, and then... this happened." She paused to lean against the wall, legs wavering again. Almost as if telling someone was bringing on a whole new strain. Sienna didn't want to look at him, and yet, she did. To see the judgement? To see it in someone else's eyes other than her own?

He bit back the 'so?' that was on his lips. At least they had had something, unlike the rest of them. At least they had been a part of something big enough to be deemed dangerous. Even if it it was gone now. "Good," he sighed finally. He had commended Mike on turning Sei and Marcine in and now he was commending Sienna on doing the opposite. "It was your job as a friend to let him live his own life."

Her gaze whipped to him, searching for something to understand. "But how," Sienna began, fingers curling under her palms on the wall to steady herself, "How--He--Isn't it my job to protect him?" He was so nervous about losing who he was and the idea of being "erased" and...

"No. It's your job to protect Miss Lethe. You don't owe Sei anything. You can choose to be his friend," Isegrim continued, "And do what you can for him. He had something for a while with Marcine, didn't he? He was happy?"

She bit her lip. "But..." Was it really that simple? The way Isegrim said it made it seem as if she were overreacting--maybe she was. But Sienna couldn't shake that feeling of letting Sei down, of not being able to protect him, not being able to keep him from being brainwashed... So unrealistic, and yet...

If she'd just convinced him not to be with Marcine instead of just watching it happen... So it was a good thing that Sienna didn't know the terms on which the two separated, otherwise she'd feel ten times worse!

"... It's hard, picturing the two of them together..." she remarked, smiling bitterly. "They're such opposites... I thought it was just a crush and he'd get over it and everything would be okay."

It was a bit difficult to picture them together, thought not nearly as difficult as picturing Marcine with Lee. Isegrim nodded, mostly to himself, and leaned languidly against the wall. "It's wrong that... that whatever they had was taken away from them but... they're still the same people. In the long run... they're still the same as they ever were..." Even as he said it he began to doubt his words. Rhys hadn't been the same...

"Is that really true?"

"I... I hope it is," Isegrim sighed in defeat. Sei and Marcine had seemed alright, though he had seen little of them lately. "It's not fair for them to have had nothing..."

Was it really possible to alter someone's emotions and memories of such a strong thing like love and have them be the same? Was it really like that? To erase something so important and continue to be the same person...

Sienna had no response to that.

There was no good way to handle the situation. If Marcine and Sei had run away together, everyone would have called them traitors. If they had stayed together at the cathedral, they could have put their oracles at risk. She had a right to be upset but... Sienna would have to deal with all of this eventually. "Come get something to eat," he suggested weakly. Isegrim didn't like seeing her like this. "You need to keep up your strength. For Sei."

"For Sei."

Sienna wet her lip. "... Okay." Isegrim was a stronghold, Isegrim was familiar, Isegrim was something good. Maybe she needed that right now. Releasing her hold on the wall, she waited for him to lead the way.

He tried giving her a small smile, knowing that she wouldn't return it. "You don't look well. Have you been sleeping much lately?" Is they were going to dance around the issue, Isegrim would concern himself with its affects.

She hesitated before answering, slightly embarrassed. "Less hours."

"You should try to get some more sleep," Isegrim sighed as they walked, keeping a hand out in case Sienna fell over. She was so pale...

"Yeah..." Maybe food would make her tired, if she could force herself to eat anything.

And then her arm was reaching out, hand grasping the edge of Isegrim's top lightly. Continuing to look down at the carpet, Sienna said softly, "Thank you... Isegrim."

"You're welcome," he said, a little surprised, with a smile. He covered her hand briefly with his and gave it a small squeeze. Isegrim kept on to the cafeteria, anxious to get her something to eat. If she kept on like this, she was bound to become ill. "Haven't been eating much either, hmm? There must be quite a bit of extra food piling up."

She blushed when their hands contacted but just nodded meekly. Stepping inside the cafeteria proved stressful as the aroma of food assaulted her senses and she fought the urge to bail.

Unbeknownst to either of them, on the floor lay an innocent, overlooked spoon, and it skidded behind the ebony-haired girl as she tripped over it, falling flat on her face with a yelp.

Sienna seemed to fall in slow motion as Isegrim futilely reached out to catch her. His fingertips just missed her shoulder as she crashed to the ground. He half-tripped himself but regained his balance finally., know that the last thing Sienna needed right now was Isegrim landing on top of her. "Sienna!" he cried out, crouching beside her. "I'm so sorry! Are you alright?" Now, he felt, the situation required the question.

asdjlksjdkjskljfdkgfh

Oh, oh that hurt. Wincing, Sienna pushed herself up slowly into a sitting position, arms shaking. There was something warm and sticky running down her lips--Blood? Well, yes, her nose was starting to pound dully and touching it, she pulled back with a gasp of pain. "My node..." she said, staring at her bloodied fingers. Then, Did I just say 'node'? WHY WAS IT SO FAMILIAR, HMM I WONDER.

Oh dear, she seemed to be bleeding quite a bit. "Wait here," Isegrim said hurriedly before getting up to dash over to a table to grab some napkins. He almost tripped once more himself on the way back, half sliding over to where Sienna sat. "Here." He held the napkins up to her nose to catch the blood. "I think you're supposed to tilt your head back." His mother had always just told him to shake it off, which hardly ever helped.

Sienna hardly processed what Isegrim was doing; she was still in a state of shock that she fell right on her face. And in front of someone, no less! So embarrassing!

"Ah, da-d-t-dank you," she said, giving up with proper pronounciation and tilting her head back as he instructed.

He nodded as he tried to clean the blood from her face with a few spare napkins. He'd known the nose to bleed a lot but... this seemed rather ridiculous. "Why don't we move you to a chair, hmm?" Isegrim hardly thought Sienna would want her fellow guardians to see her sitting in a bloody pile on the cafeteria floor.

It's Arunafeltz, what can I say?

She nodded slightly, steadying her palms against the floor before slowly, slowly pushing herself up. Alas, still a rather dizzy experience! Gaining her footing, she began teetering towards the nearest seat available.

Isegrim did his best to keep Sienna steady on her way to the chair, his face pained. Well, this could've gone better... "Would you... ah... like some water?" Could she even drink like this? "Or... some new napkins?"

Sienna all but plopped down in the chair unceremoniously, tilting her head back once again. "Nabins, please," she said, looking up at Isegrim's face and wondering why it was getting blurry.

He hurried back over to the table and took a thick stack of them before rushing back to Sienna. "Uh... here," he sighed, setting them in her lap. "Maybe... apply some pressure?" Did that work with the nose?

Apply pressure, huh? Okay... "...!!!" Okay, no. Sienna cringed, curling in and holding the napkins more loosely around her nose. She let out an exhausted sigh. This week was really...not so good.

Apparently you weren't supposed to do that with a nose. Isegrim cringed when it seemed like he was doing more harm than good. "I... ah, Sorry." Meat was for black eyes... "I never knew silverware could be so dangerous..."

"Not your fault," she replied, raising her head and opening an eye to look at him. "Wasn't caref..." Bad choice, Sienna thought as another wave of dizzyness came over her.

"Are you...?" Maybe she needed a cold compress or something? "Do you want to lie down?" He could try to get her some soup later...

"Should go... Room and s..." Slee..

GOOD NIGHT, SIENNA.

Fretting for a few minutes before picking up Sienna, Isegrim frowned. It most definitely could have gone better. Staring down at the bloody napkins littering the floor, he decided to get Sienna to bed first and then come back to clean up. The questions was: did he take her to her room or to his? He didn't want to go into hers without permission but... it would be disorienting to wake up in an unknown bed. Finally, the guardian headed off in the direction of earth cul du sac.



Sienna made her way back to the living groggily, blinking at the unfamiliar ceiling a few times before the fact that it was unfamiliar hit her. Why...? Why was her mouth dry? Trying to inhale with her nose, the Water Guardian winced. Why was it all stuf--

Oh. Oh.

So...she was in the infirmiry? Rolling her head to the side, Sienna thought, This doesn't look like what an infirmiry should look like.

Isegrim opened the door to his room a few moments later, the front of his shirt smeared with blood and a bag of ice in hand. "Awake already?" he asked with a small smile. "I thought you'd be out for at least an hour or two." There were no signs of Sienna's spill left in the cathedral, except for the napkins in the garbage. "For your nose." The guardian handed her the bag of ice. That would probably help more than the pressure had.

.......................

This was Isegrim's room. Of course. No need to panic, no need to be alarmed--

"I'm sorry!" Sienna gasped, sitting up at once. Her head was none too happy with the action, though, and she immediately regretted it. "S-Sorry, sor--your shirt." Holy crap, she bloodied his shirt? When had that happened?

"No, no, no," he sighed, gesturing for her to sit back down. "It's nothing, I'm sure it'll come out." He had no idea if it would come out, actually, but hardly minded in any case. "Just lie back down. Sorry about bringing you to my room but I didn't just want to barge into yours."

"Ah..." Relunctantly, she eased back down onto the bed, looking up at him apologetically. "Sorry..."

Isegrim sat on the edge of the bed and smiled once more. "Don't worry about it. At least this way you got some rest." Not the best way to go about it, but it was still something. "Do you need anything?"

Her cheeks turned pink. "Um... The ice, I guess..." How long would she be here? What time was it, anyway?

He motioned to the ice on the bed. "When you feel a little better I can walk you back to your room." Isegrim wondered if she'd hurt her head when she had fallen and not just her nose. Could it have been broken?

Placing the bag of ice onto her face and wincing at the cold shock, Sienna let out a long sigh. "I can't believe I did that..." she mumbled, closing her eyes. Ah, the ice was so cold! At least it would numb her nose...and the minor areas of hurt on her forehead. That would bruise, wouldn't it? What an embarrassing sight she'd be, red swollen nose and a black and blue forehead.

Still...

There was some strange happiness, small but growing, induced by the situation. Or rather, by the consequences. Sure, she'd be sore for a while, and those feelings of guilt were still rampant, but...

But it was because of those things that she was here right now. And Sienna, despite everything that was happening, found her lips curving upwards into a smile of their own accord.

Those things didn't matter right now because Isegrim was here.

"It wasn't... that embarrassing," he said with a grin before bringing his legs onto the bed to half-kneel beside Sienna. "I've seen much worse. Probably done it, too." Well, he was positive he'd done worse but it felt nice for once to be the one helping the situation. "Besides, I didn't even see you fall. Not really. I just saw the aftermath."

She let out a chuckle. "At least it was just you."

She was looking on the positive side of things! Actually, Isegrim thought with a puzzled grin, the fall on her face had done quite a bit for Sienna's mood. Perhaps all she had needed was a bit of rest. Or... perhaps she was concussed... "There's always that, too. It was rather an impressive tumble, in my opinion. Few people choose to break their fall with their face." He hoped the teasing didn't bother her, but he wanted to see if he could make her laugh.

"Hey!" She pulled the ice off her face and pouted comically at Isegrim. "I didn't choose it!" Sienna's fingers ghosted near her nose, but she made no move to touch it again. "I wonder if it's broken... Ah..." Her sigh turned into a yawn, hand moving down to cover her mouth.

Shrugging, Isegrim took a closer look at her nose. "It doesn't look broken...." Could you sprain your nose? Maybe that's what had happened... He glanced up from Sienna's nose to her eyes and abruptly sat back. Ahaha, he hadn't noticed he'd been so close. She, ah, probably wanted her space right now. "Sleepy?" he asked as he tried to resist the blush he knew was coming on.

Sienna blinked into clear, blue eyes and she couldn't help but notice how...different they were. Different. Nice. Then they were gone and she blinked again, letting out a breath she hadn't known she was holding.

"Maybe my head is broken..." Sienna gave Isegrim a childish, almost dazed smile as she tapped the side of her head experimentally. That would explain...a lot of things, really. "I shouldn't take your bed..."

"We'll just have to take it off, I suppose," Isegrim sighed exaggeratedly, shaking his head. "Your choice, though. As for my bed, you're welcome to it. After all, I won't be using it until later. But if you'd like I can help you back to your room now." Would she be alright to walk already? A head injury and a lot of bloodloss wasn't the best combination.

"Mmmm..." Manners told Sienna to get up and go, but it was so comfortable here on Isegrim's bed in his room with him nearby... And her eyelids were fighting to stay open and anyway, he said she was welcome to it, so...

"Maybe...just a little while longer..." she murmured, nodding off.

He grinned at the sight of her drifting off. "Goodnight," he sighed, getting up very carefully from his place on the bed. If she stayed asleep for too long, she'd miss her shift, Isegrim thought with a grimace. He could always write to Sei and see if he could cover for her for an hour or two. He hated to burden him but... she needed the rest.