hi guys

[metaphortunate]

Hey! What have y'all been up to?

siblingsLast night I got to hear the story of Mr. E's friend's older son meeting his newborn brother for the very first time. They had a homebirth, so toddler boy got whisked away early in the morning and came back to find a very tired mama nursing a very small baby. Well, mama was happy to see him of course, and

Comments

[khedron]

We haven't tried M&Ms yet, although I have been considering it. Instead, we have presented flushing as an exciting treat that you only get to do if you actually use the potty. It involves cheering, waving bye-bye, and talking about how the poop is going off on its poop adventure through the sewer system to the ocean.

M&Ms were awesome for us. They changed potty-use from a thing that (our) E. intellectually understood but had no interest in, into something with a tangible benefit. For kids who mind being in wet/dirty diapers, that might be different, but she apparently wasn't too bothered. We've gradually ratcheted it back, and now we're at one treat for no accidents at school, and one treat for staying dry all night (in diaper). The all-night thing does happen sometimes. If it happens for a week straight, we might even be brave enough to try going without diapers. Maybe.

FWIW, reesei's sister uses Skittles, because they don't stain as much.

(m00nglum, who's not here much these days, has a great story about doing the three-day crash potty

[m00nglum]

Since Khedron called...

On potty training: We did a three day bootcamp. Those three days sucked. Now we have a potty trained two year old, which is basically all the awesome. Basic premise is: you throw/give away all the diapers in the house. Diapers no longer exist. For the next three days ask your kid 100 times a day to tell mom or dad if they need to go. Note this is NOT asking them if they need to go. And watch them constantly, so if they go without asking you can whisk them away. I have never done so much laundry. There is more, call and chat if you want to hear it. (In all your spare time, natch!)

On siblings: M asked if we could make a baby for her. lolz were had. The conversation went down hill. There was medical AND mad scientist humor.

On the patriarchy: Sometimes I read something and think I am good. Then I read about E and realize I don't do anything at all. You found yourself a keeper!

[khedron]

Since Khedron called...

WHOA?! How'd that happen? Does LJ finally have summoning ability?

[jedusor]

Basically. They've started sending notification e-mails when your username is mentioned. (Well, ostensibly. Not sure how reliable it is.)

[reesei]

If it helps at all to get counter stories, the first time E saw A, she was SOOOO HAPPY that the baby was here! All she wanted to do was hug Mommy, and hug Daddy, and hug Baby Brother. And turn on the fan to keep him "safe and warm". Friction has only really started showing now that he is mobile, and sometimes touches her or "her" toys. Maybe that agrees with your hypothesis about nursing?

The first time she saw him nursing, she just kinda looked over and said (in toddler-speak) "Oh, the baby drinks mama milk from mama's nipple. I drink cow milk." and wandered away. She was much more interested in the pump when it first made an appearance, because it explained how the milk got from me to a bottle sometimes.

Thank you for your stories and your introspection. And I really need to remember that next time I go help M get the kids dressed in the morning when I should be in the shower.

[lcohen]

i have no baby to contribute to this discussion, but i have had the chance to watch becca get used to her baby sister. and she is very sweet to nora, but yes, very protective of her toys--we spend a lot of time putting things where nora can't reach. but the other thing is that part of why i started going over there on the occasional play date and such when nora was just a newborn--we had established that becca liked me and trusted me, and i could be exclusively hers for an afternoon, paying attention only to her. maybe that just helped because it gave matt and kelly a bit of a rest (one could rest, one could handle nora, then trade off) but becca seems to like it too. becca is 4 and nora is just a bit older than 1, so i'm sure things will change as nora is more mobile and able to get into things.

[metaphortunate]

Yeah. I hear that one on one time is key. It's awesome that it can be one on one time with a liked and trusted adult friend, too, not just the parents!!

[metaphortunate]

It really helps to get counter stories, thank you! I need confidence. That is adorable.

We had a one-year-old visiting this weekend, and yes, the touching of the toys was a source of conflict. So I find it comforting that that won't be an issue for a long while.

[pantryslut]

We used stickers rather than candy (and only for overnight training, as it happens). A calendar sticker chart on the bathroom wall was the Best Thing Ever times twelve.

[khedron]

That is a *very* interesting idea...!

[khedron]

:-)

[elusis]

My sister, on the other hand, wasn't so thrilled about this big ape who'd gotten there before her. About half a year in, she figured out that she could smack me on the head and start wailing while she did it, and the big people would yell at me.

OMG. My little sister (4 years younger, a TERRIBLE separation amount if you ask me) would bite herself and then show Mom the teeth marks. Mom (and Dad), both being youngests, always sided with her. Now she thinks this is a "hilarious family anecdote." I disagree.

[harimad]

Hilarious! As a parent I'd put an immediate stop to that, but be a little pleased at the cleverness of the baby.

[kcatalyst]

I have always struggled with the gatekeeper thing, but right after solo parenting, I'm usually like "now it's YOUR turn! for the next FIVE YEARS!"

And I still recommend nudity as the most useful potty training tool ever.

[metaphortunate]

Nudity is a better idea in a climate warmer than this one. :(