ME: Hey Junebug, take a look at this card. Can you read what it says ( Read more... )

In an effort to get our goldbricking, foot-dragging children to haul their butts up the stairs after dinner without whining every step of the way or demanding a horsey ride every single night, we have instituted a game called "Tickle on the Landing". The rules of this game are that, if you are on the ground floor, either of the two stair landings, ( Read more... )

This day, man. This fucking day ( Read more... )

You may remember that I made some pathetic efforts to silicone caulk around the back door recently, and the Junebug was fascinated; therefore, he easily identified what the handyman we saw out the train window this morning was doing ( Read more... )

When Kid 1 is like: "No kisses. No hugs. No nose boops. Bye, don't touch me. I'm gonna shoot a cannon at you ( Read more... )

This is for my friends who have daughters ( Read more... )

For those of you planning to have babies in the future, I highly recommend harnessing the placebo effect by teaching your kids that the thing to do with a stubbed toe or bumped head or similar owie is to have a parent kiss it and blow on it. It actually seems to make them feel better from these little injuries there's nothing else to do about ( Read more... )

Last night I started to have a sexy dream and then it gradually started to get mixed up with a work dream and at one point I was trying to have sex inside of a PowerPoint presentation and then somehow one of our project managers was there and I basically woke myself up mentally screaming NOOOOOOO ( Read more... )

Last night I got to go out with destinationtoast and she let me harangue her for like half an hour about Fury Road and just why it was so amazing! I HAD MORE TO SAY. I had to stop because the performance we actually went to see had started. She is the most patient friend. <3 Also she is way more plugged into fandom than me right now so has the most ( Read more... )

1. If the Junebug ever gets comfortable enough with you to tease you, he will call you an eyeball. Or diaper cream. "Hi eyeball!" he will beam. "Hi, diaper cream!" He knows he is being silly and he loves it. I don't know where "diaper cream" comes from, other than that obviously it's a thing we use around the house. Now you might think that " ( Read more... )