an advice for the big ones: a way to a cat's heart is through tummy rubs.

i am so bummed out. the big one has not been around very much. just about every day he leaves the apartment early in the morning and doesn't come back until many hours later. and as soon as he comes back he goes straight to sleep! the big one doesn't have any time for giving me affection or attention. what is up with the big one? he always says ( Read more... )

every once in awhile the big one will strap on some big black apparatus around his shoulders, strike the shiny silver strings with his right hand, and make some godawful twangy noise, all the while dancing around the apartment and singing about some hungry wolf ( Read more... )

the big one has a chronic issue with his grammar. every time he's petting me, he's always fawning, "you're the cutest cats in the world." hello! i am only a single cat, okay? to be grammatically correct, i am a "cat" not "cats."

stupid humans and their bad grammar.

he came home minutes ago, and as soon as he got settled in he started jumping around the apartment, yelling "kitty flakes! kitty flakes for all!" and then he fed us huge amounts of kitty flakes!

what's up with that?

i am so sad that the football season will be over in two weeks. the big one has been spending most of the weekend sitting on the beanbag with the comforter on his lap. he lets me sleep on the comforter and gives me tummy rubs. i even napped a few times while he was watching the game over the weekend. but after the season is over that will be no ( Read more... )

scarlet (my sister) always hogs the big one when we're sleeping. she purrs on his chest for godawful 30 minutes or so before falling to sleep and the only place where i can lie down to the big one is around his legs. scarlet thinks she is the alpha cat in the household. why is it that brute strength always wins over intelligence?

last week the big one had several other big ones come over. they smelled like other cats. i'm scared of other big ones! so i ran to the top of the refrigerator, but my slutty sister scarlet pretty much whored herself to the whole slew of big ones. she got neck rubs from all of them. what a slut ( Read more... )

happy birthday to that big one with the cool name (melanie). let's hear it for extentofmysin. she and her cat jimmy are awesome.

he's been bouncing arounding the apartment chanting "zombie! zombie nation!" or some shit like that. i think he has turned into a zombie or something.