I have dreams of orka whales and elves but I wake up in fear that you will never be my dear dear dear friend.

 There used to be a part of me that was highly imaginative.   I could spend hours in my room writing or outside, plotting characters and scenarios in my head for what I thought would make a good book or movie. I used to leave my friends just so I could have that time to myself and be able to think about things.  Even when I was about 5 or 6 I used ( Read more... )

Why oh why does it always take something horrible to happen in order to realize whats really important to you. I wish i believed in god, or something.

I have always been interested in geography, even as a child when I was unaware of what the term meant.  The differences in landscapes and cultures has always captivated me and I incessantly questioned my father about how mountains were formed and what languages were spoken where.  My life is so deeply intertwined in these relations between myself, ( Read more... )

I feel like shit.  This is the last time I do this to myself i swear i swear i swear.
1 month left of school, ever. I just have to keep repeating that to myself.

 why do i always have to fucking torture myself by getting in these fucked up situations ( Read more... )

I went running tonight and saw more deer than I've ever seen in my life.
Its kind of funny that I spent most of my childhood sundays in a mini-van with my parents on a quest to find deer to look at. Thousands of sate and city parks, completely deer-less. But I move to a bigger city and its deer central.
I saw fawns, does and even big bucks.  I was ( Read more... )

I think I made a mistake.
So I liked this guy. Like this guy. The thing is I'm quite positive that I like him more than he likes me.  I always congratulate myself on being able to sense these things, but lately i'm using it more than a defense mechanism than for good judgment.  
Anyhow, i'm quite sure he's still in love with his ex, and that is no ( Read more... )

I need something to look forward to.

I think I successfully talked my parents into paying for me to go to school til May. My argument: one semester isn't enough time to meet someone, fall in love, and find my future husband.  They agreed that more time, and insurance, will be needed.

by any means necessary.