There he was, legs made into gelatin, a mockery of his former grace. Upon seeing me, one of them, he tried to get up on his shattered legs and crawl away from me. Of course since he had tumbled into the ditch as a result of his now useless legs, there was no hope of following his instincts, gravity and nerves simply wouldn’t allow it. This young ( Read more... )

When I made it to highschool, half of my group was gunned down by fate, wounded by drugs, slothfulness, and hormones. The rest of my group pressed on, struggling to reach the safehaven of college. I thought the worst was over my senior year. I was horribly mistaken. One year completed of my college career, and not just half of the remaining group, ( Read more... )

It's getting darker out there. My world has become so dynamic that if I stand in one spot too long I will be sucked under the shifting sands of time. Feeling complete instability is like feeling a gunshot just to the left of your femoral artery. You are thanking your deity that you're going to live but you have too admit that the pain is ( Read more... )

I have become some hybrid of beast and machine, efficient instinct, primal precision. I am no longer human.

Thirteen more days until I leave Minnesota. Eight more days till I turn Eighteen. This summer has been an enlightening experience, and I am glad that I have not only endured the hardships I have been confronted with, but rather embraced these challenges. What has interested me of late is the growing realization of how naive we all are for believing ( Read more... )

I am sorry. I've lost everyone...I have reached a new level of loneliness. I officially have no past, and I could simply dissappear of this earth at this very moment without anyone ever knowing

I stare beyond my desk and realize, here I am, where I always wanted to be... wearing a suit, sitting at a desk that I can call mine. I think to myself, where do I go now, what do I do now. I know the answers, but the path is so much more difficult to follow. Thank you, all of you, for playing such an important role in my life. I hope I can make ( Read more... )

I must confess, being on my own is a different experience. We are so used to having the presence of a hierarch telling us we have to come home, or we can't do this or that. But that's gone now for me, and I find it fascinating and yet confusing. I go where I want, when I want, and I stay for as long as I want. I feel as though I am breaking some ( Read more... )

Well life is good now that I am on my own. OH MY SWEET LOVE IT IS GOOOOOD! Living here by myself in Minneapolis, such a beautiful city, 68 degrees every day, no humidity, let me tell you it is a God send. And yesterday I started work....with a BANG! Cracked a $300,000.00 loan on this seventy five acre farm. That means Nelson made 6,000 his first

So close to the end, and another dear friend lost... So it goes. Guess I never was meant to be accepted by my own, never have been, and I guess I never will. But at least I can fade away, at least I can fade away....