Comments | mankoeponymous: (без темы)

mankoeponymous

(Untitled)

Oct 21, 2012 09:08

Spokeswoman from the Komen anti-cancer folks explains why fighting breast cancer is so important: "Because everyone has the right to live, to fall in love and get married, to watch their kids grow up, all of that ( Read more... )

Comments 11

mizliz October 21 2012, 15:30:27 UTC

If it's any comfort, I'm a scourge on society as well, by being a single mother. Didn't you get the memo about how awful we are? Our kids are doomed to become criminals, dropouts, and welfare queens.

We're particularly appalling if we don't manage to make 50K+ a year while keeping our homes decent and supervising our children's homework properly. And why weren't we at the last PTA meeting? Oh...we had to work? Well...we just need to think about our priorities, don't we?

Aren't you tired? I'm fucking tired. Fuck 'em.

hudebnik October 22 2012, 01:21:54 UTC

Ever notice, BTW, that Romney said that stuff about the kids of single mothers while standing across the stage from the President of the United States, who happens to be a child of a single mother?

mizliz October 22 2012, 02:58:36 UTC

Well, yeah, and Clinton was too. But to Romney and his ilk, those examples just prove how far America has fallen.
Because in Decent Christian America, both of them would have been put in orphanages and trained to mop floors. How dare they get an education and get all back-talky?

hudebnik October 22 2012, 01:20:23 UTC

Ya know, there used to be a Usenet group about this, called alt.support.childfree, on which shalmestere was fairly active. There really are a lot of societal pressures saying "having kids is the right/normal thing to do," and that group was a good place to bitch and commiserate about the latest examples.

I heard a song on the radio today that boiled down to "I didn't have kids, and now I'm too old, and I'm afraid I'll be all alone when I'm old and feeble. My husband is no help, as he's older than I am, and my siblings all have their own descendants to worry about." All to a cheery, peppy, Irish-trad tune; nobody can say depressing things as cheerily as the Irish.

We've discussed the "who will advocate for us when we're old?" issue, and have concluded that we need to make a bunch of close friends who are, say, ten years younger than we are. We're not sure how to do that....

kazoogrrl October 22 2012, 01:46:19 UTC

My boyfriend and I have been working on our friends' kids so they'll take care of us when we're old. Because the cats? Useless.

mizliz October 22 2012, 03:03:47 UTC

I just have the one child, and I worry for the burden it will place on her. I worry too for my friends who don't have children. Historically, the only thing that kept the old from dying from starvation was either wealth, or adult children to feed and care for them. We've had some options the last century with slightly improved gender equity with jobs/wages, and with some social safety nets. With all that looking pretty tenuous now, I'm not sure we aren't going to see a return to the way things were for the elderly. And that bodes very ill for those who don't have kids.

mankoeponymous October 25 2012, 02:07:11 UTC

I totally respect the childfree folks - believe me, nobody appreciates those who opt not to breed more than schoolteachers!

The thing is, I really wanted kids. And now it's pretty much too late.

phenakistoscope October 23 2012, 19:39:54 UTC

You know what? FUCK society.

Fuck them hard.

Life is about living. In whatever way suits YOU best. If you're living a life that makes you feel happy and fulfilled or inspired or impassioned, who cares if you have kids or don't, if you're married or not, if you're making 6 figures a year or 4. Life isn't about some asinine goals from the 1950s that misogynist Christians invented. Life is about finding your spark and letting it burn.

So burn away, Manko. Because I think you're pretty damn awesome. :)

mankoeponymous October 23 2012, 20:28:41 UTC

Aw, thanks.

And of course you're right.

And I like I think I'm fucking society with vigor by warping the minds of the young.

But.

I WANT a wife and kids.

phenakistoscope October 23 2012, 21:00:29 UTC

Do you? ... I don't ask that to be rude. I ask that because I think you're probably like me. I want a husband and (potentially/maybe/possibly) kids, I think, at some point. But my problem is that I want the right husband with which to create the right children. And I'm not willing to sell out and settle. Because I think I am happier alone and searching than tied into something I don't feel right about. In fact, I have no interest in being tied into something I feel false about...at all ( ... )

mankoeponymous October 25 2012, 02:28:09 UTC

It's just barely theoretically plausible that maybe if I were to make massive compromises I could at least date someone. And by extension maybe marry someone. etc ( ... )