[RL WITH SIRIUS]

[lycanthropy_101]

Remus sat in his living room, on the sofa next to the fireplace, waiting for Sirius to come over. He'd invited him, which was why he was expecting him, having finally found a time where they were both free, and they weren't being cornered by James, and the full moon wasn't going to happen for a while yet, and so the two of them had time to just be

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[why_so_me]

Sirius was incredibly lucky that his parents hadn't grounded him for the whole summer yet. Somehow, they managed not to notice that Remus had been there when he'd been cat-eared, and remained similarly oblivious about him going to see James. He hoped he was lucky again.

When he walked out of the fireplace, he wore a cheeky smile. "'llo there. Long time no see."

[lycanthropy_101]

Remus looked anguished, but it was very clear to him that yes, he did know that Sirius wasn't going to drop the subject, now that it had been brought up. Remus turned and waded out of the creek, going to pick up a towel and hold it out to Sirius, averting his eyes from the other boy. "C'mon, then. I. I don't think that I can talk to you the way I need to when you're like that, at least put this on," he said. "We... We can talk here, I just. You need to put this on, first."

[why_so_me]

Sirius was confused, and his expression showed it. But he did what Remus said, taking the towel as he climbed out of the creek and wrapping it around his waist. "That better?" he asked.

[lycanthropy_101]

Remus nodded, moving to sit down on the ground and wrap himself in his own towel, but it was obvious in the way that he's practically curling himself up in the towel that something was still wrong.

"...Pads," Remus said, after a moment of sitting there in silence, playing with a stray thread on the towel he's cradling himself in, "do... Do you remember what I said about my mum being after me to find a girlfriend...?"

[why_so_me]

Sirius watched Remus curl up with a concerned look on his face, wondering what on earth was going on. "...yeah. Yeah, I remember," he said. "What about it?" Was his mum making him date someone awful or something?

[lycanthropy_101]

Remus couldn't look at Sirius in that moment. He just couldn't. He had to get this out, and looking at Sirius's face... He didn't want to see Sirius's face in case his friend shunned him because of this, he didn't think he could handle that sort of rejection. "Do you remember how you asked me...you asked me what kind of a girl I like, and I had trouble answering you?" he asked, keeping his eyes locked on that stray thread on his towel.

[why_so_me]

He nodded, still feeling really confused, and worried that Remus was deliberately hiding his face. "Yeah, I remember that," Sirius said. "What about it?"

[lycanthropy_101]

There it was. The moment of truth. The moment where Remus just needed to come out and say what it was that needed saying. And he was terrified, but he faced something worse than this every full moon, so it was silly to be scared of this. And yet... Remus ducked his head, and forced the words out of his mouth. "I... I had trouble answering what kind of girl that I liked because... Because..." He swallowed, his throat suddenly very dry, his voice dropping low. "Because...I don't like girls, Pads."

[why_so_me]

Sirius stared for a moment, looking at the clearly freaked-out boy sitting next to him. "Oh," he said, and the puzzle pieces started to click, from Remus' hidden face to his statements to why Sirius had to put on the towel. "So. Um. Instead of girls, you like....?"

[lycanthropy_101]

Remus ducked his head even further to hide his face in his hands. "...I like boys. I... I really only like boys. I'm... I'm gay. I'm a flipping gay werewolf, and my life is absolutely ruined, and if you don't want to be friends with me anymore, I'll understand but I just...I couldn't keep that a secret from you," he ranted, possibly getting a little hysterical, he couldn't be sure. He was trying to keep his breathing steady, but oh god, Sirius was going to get up and leave him there and he wanted nothing more than to just get up and run away himself, run away right then and there. Or possibly throw up. God, his nerves were pretty much just shot in that moment.

[why_so_me]

Sirius' expression went from 'confused' to 'alarmed' in half a second. "Hey. Whoa. Your life isn't ruined. Seriously. And I'm not going to just run off and stop being your friend, okay?" Sirius said, wondering if putting a hand on Remus' shoulder would be bad idea, which it probably was. "It's okay, alright? Calm down."

[lycanthropy_101]

Calm down? Calm down? Calm down? Remus couldn't take it anymore. He grabbed his shirt and jumped up from where he was sitting, not even picking his head up to look at Sirius, and exclaimed, "I'm sorry, I'm wasting your time!" and started briskly up the path. It wasn't until he'd taken a few steps where he realized that Sirius had reassured him that he wasn't going anywhere, but it was too late then, Remus was already on the move.

[why_so_me]

Sirius took a second to realize that holy crap, Remus had just bolted from the scene. "Whoa! Oi, Moony!" he said, rising to his feet and chasing after him while still trying to keep his towel on, which wasn't that easy. Still, he tried his best to catch up to his clearly panicked friend. "Moony, come back!"

[lycanthropy_101]

Remus didn't stop running away, but he did slow down enough that, if Sirius really wanted to catch him, to stop him in his tracks, then he could. Remus knew that if he really wanted to get away, he could probably run faster and longer than his friend, simply because of the whole werewolf thing, but. He didn't want to run way, not really. He just. He was so afraid of being rejected, he had prepared himself for the worst, and now that the worst hadn't actually been the outcome... Remus might have been hyperventilating, a little bit, though he couldn't be sure because the sound of blood rushing through his ears made it hard to tell.

[why_so_me]

Sirius tried to pick up the pace as Remus slowed down, still struggling to keep his towel on. Eventually, he was able to catch up to Remus and he grabbed the other boy's shoulder; he didn't do so roughly, just enough to get his attention. "Moony, stop running!"

[lycanthropy_101]

Remus was pulled to a stop by Sirius, and he stood there, clutching his shirt and his towel, not daring to look up at Sirius and see what might be on his friend's face. Yes, he probably was hyperventilating a little bit, there was no question about it, but he just couldn't get his mind around what was going on. He'd... He'd just told Sirius. He'd told Sirius, and Sirius hadn't freaked out, and he hadn't been prepared for that even though he'd hoped that Sirius wouldn't, and oh god. He finally brought his gaze up to look at Sirius, his eyes so sad and scared and definitely not the eyes of a 15-year-old boy, the life that he's had to deal with over the years having aged him mentally a lot faster than normal kids his age.