Via fengi

[ludickid]

I'm a fake-tough teenage gangsta for Christ!

I'm a fake-tough teenage Superboy for Christ!

I'm a fake-tough teenage career hag for Christ!

I'm a fake-tough teenage Magic: The Gathering geek for Christ!

I'm a fake-tough teenage child molester for Christ!

I'm a fake-tough teenage stoner for Christ!

I'm a fake-tough teenage extreme sports

Comments

[granolademonic]

I am seriously growing weary of Christians, and you are fueling the fire, sir, and for that I salute you.

I told my wife just last night, "Ya know, it used to be that I was just politely, quietly amused by Christians. Now I want to get in their faces and provoke them and accost them and point out the many ways in which they are ignorant and pathetic."

They angry up the blood.

[ludickid]

Now I want to get in their faces and provoke them and accost them

You FOOL! Persecute them at YOUR PERIL! Can't you feel the raging power of their teenage sulking?

[granolademonic]

You FOOL! Persecute them at YOUR PERIL! Can't you feel the raging power of their teenage sulking?

I am reminded of a Christian shirt some metalhead Jeebus Lover wore to my high school. Written in the style of the Medadeth and Slayer logos, the shirt said, "Megalife Through Prayer."

His sulking was a thing of glowing, Christlike beauty.

[hoolifan]

Man, if a Muslim were to get down and pray in a mall in this country he'd have a magazine full of police-issued .357 slugs pumped into his ass before you can say a'salaam.

But seriously. Stop persecuting us poor Christians.

[ludickid]

If only the Muslims were to learn the proper defiant teenager poses, the persecution of their own faith would finally end.

[thaitea]

The meek ain't inheriting shit.

[ludickid]

Ha ha ha ha, maaaaaan. Fuck humility! MY PEOPLES BEEN PERSECUTED, I GOT A RIGHT TO BE HOSTILE! Poor little Christians.

[stavner]

This makes me want to go out and annoy Christians in the street! Where can I get a lion?

[ludickid]

I hear there's one in the popular new Disney film, The Lion Who Lives with a Wardrobe Designer.

[pookieman]

Isn't there some sort of cause we can raise to get these angry, violent Christians crusading again? And can't we sink whatever boat they're on to wherever they're going? Or give them the wrong direction and have them crusade on to Gilligan's island? It takes YEARs to get off that rock.

[ludickid]

They're already crusading! Against the terrible persecution of their tiny 85% majority by, uh, liberals, I guess! Or something!

[pookieman]

Aw crud. I thought you had to go somewhere to crusade. Somewhere far away, I mean.

[hipsterdetritus]

The War on Christmas' new front: Iceland!