TW: Improbabilities [T-M]

[lt_indigo]

Fandom:
Torchwood

Title:
Improbabilities

In which Jack and Ianto have another unfortunate bedroom experience, Rhys loses a leg and the author has an unexpected visit.

Author:
lt_indigo

Pairing(s):
Jack/Ianto

Warning(s):
Crack. Extreme, ridiculous crack. Also, self-insert.

Disclamer:
I belong to me.

Comments

[iantojjackh]

That website is very disturbing. I don't think there is enough mindbleach in the world.

[lt_indigo]

Agreed! It served a purpose for this fic, but I'm not sure I'll visit again. Some of them really did make me laugh, though I'd worked out by that point that they were bad on purpose, rather than nominations from the dross.

[aviv_b]

OMG - Laughed my head off (quick go get it). I do remember one fic from long ago where there seemed to be an extra hand or door in bed with the boys!

[lt_indigo]

Thank you. I couldn't resist the idea once it was in my head - it took over!

[badly_knitted]

*snorfle*

So, let me get this straight - everytime the poor boys end up having badfic sex, one or more of the other characters finds a limb or two missing?

ROFLMAO!

I'm glad they didn't show up on my doorstep asking me to fix it, I would have been too busy laughing! And now I keep imagining them both in kit form with exchangeable parts and add-ons for special occasions, just snap the pieces together, easily detachable for reconfiguring, wings, tails and tentacles optional... Oh dear, I really would have been the worst person for them to come to for help, I just would have made their situation worse. O.O

Inspired lunacy! Thanks so much for writing this. *grins*

[lt_indigo]

The extra body parts have to come from somewhere. I thought about Owen, but he complained a lot, so I decided to leave him out of it for now.

I'm so glad you enjoyed it. It kind of took on a life of its own. I wasn't supposed to be in it, for a start. But then the idea of offering Ianto my coffee was too funny not to include.

Jack with tentacles. Do you know, I did consider mentioning your drunken, octopus-like Jack. I now wish I had, with real tentacles.

[badly_knitted]

Here's a fic you simply HAVE to read - I came across it last night.

http://marita-c.livejournal.com/27903.html

I have a weakness for tentacles and Torchwood, it just feels like a natural fit. Well, with Jack everything is a natural fit, lol!

I remember reading a fic one time where Ianto became a contortionist before they even made it to bed. They were going up the stairs in the Hub, Jack behind Ianto, I think his arms were around Ianto's waist, but somehow Ianto had his arms around Jack's neck. I re-read the passage several times but could never figure out how it was possible o.O

[lt_indigo]

Oh, dear god! I nearly laughed myself into an asthma attack!

I'm not a big fan of tentacles, or suckers (they freak me out, tbh), but that was just so ridiculously disgusting it worked. Thank you for sharing.

[too_beauty]

perfect! who wouldn't love it to be that our canon? everything that we write happens to them ...... sighs .....

[lt_indigo]

Tell me about it! The team would be practically immortal themselves, though - how many years worth of events have we amassed between us, without the team ageing?

Ooh, a CoE fix-it for this 'verse :D

[mango_apple]

*huge grin*

[lt_indigo]

Thank you. It was just too ridiculous to ignore.