introduction
well, i took some time to fold my laundry and listen to some music and i'm calmer now, so i'll actually introduce myself this time.
My name: augustine
His/Her name (& LJ name if they have one): Micah
I live: in Boston at college, in Milwaukee at home
My age: 19
He/She lives: in St. Louis at college, in Milwaukee at home
His/Her age: 19
Distance: 1200 miles
Together since: July 18 2007
We met: we went to different high schools but had a few common friends. we'd met briefly at Forensics tournaments but never long enough to get names. then last summer, my friend threw the traditional "water fight" party she's had for the last five years, where we all gather up our water balloons and squirt guns and spend an afternoon in an epic gender battle. his friend Nate was invited and didn't know many of the guests, so Nate brought Micah along to keep him company. i cut my foot on a rock during the fight, so i sat down on the curb to stop the bleeding and rest. he sat down next to me and struck up a conversation, and didn't leave my side the rest of the afternoon.
We get to see each other (approximately how often): i'm lucky enough to be going home in less than a week to spend 3 months with him at home; when we're at school, we get to see each other for about 3-4 days at a time every 7 weeks or so.
Future plans: visits when we can afford them, phone calls and video chats when we can't. we're studying in related fields (i'm neurobiology, and he's psychology). we're planning on ending up in the same place for graduate school, and possibly getting married after a few years of short distance.
Share some photos:
our first visit in our long distance relationship
it's strange to think that he and i will get three months together, starting in less than a week. this will be the longest time we'll have had in each other's presence, since we didn't start dating until a month before i left for college.
i am honestly amazed at the incredible person i have in my life, so i thought i would share a few details.
when Micah and i met, i had never been truly happy in a relationship. i thought i knew what love was, but what i really felt was pity and a desire to be needed. i wanted to run away from my life in Milwaukee; i wanted to forget about high school, forget about the people i'd been with, forget the uncertainty and confusion i felt about myself and my life. i planned on coming out to Boston and never looking back. i was signed up as an aero/astronautical engineering major here at MIT and i was enrolled in the Navy ROTC program. my idea was that i would have the Navy foot my college bill, i would become a Naval pilot, and eventually become a part of the NASA astronaut program.
i meant for us to be a summer fling; i just meant to have fun, then forget it. i knew i was falling for him towards the end, but i kept telling myself that we hadn't had enough time to know if it was right. the night before i left for college, we lost our virginity together; i wanted him to know that he had every part of me. i found out later that he had meant to wait until marriage; still, somehow he decided that i was the right person, and he didn't hesitate.
when i left, i promised him that i was all right, and made a real effort to meet new people and try to start the life i had desperately wanted before. he went to his school and we talked a lot, but we began to drift apart. we had said "i love you" but quickly stopped saying it; we were both trying to let go. it wasn't until another girl - his ex-turned-close-friend - confessed that she was in love with him that we began to talk about us again. i told him i still loved him, and through our conversations he came to realize that he still wanted to be with me, in spite of the difficulty and the distance.
i have come so far since then. i realized quickly that ROTC was completely wrong for me; i would be a terrible military officer. i hated the activities, i didn't like the people, the ideas and lessons they taught were repulsive to me. still, if it hadn't been for Micah's support, i would never have had the strength to confront my parents. they nearly disowned me; there were periods last fall when i didn't know if i would ever speak to my father again, or if i would be able to go home. they told me i was throwing away my life. i realized i didn't want to study engineering; the math and the technicalities of it would drive me insane. i was constantly stressed and depressed. my grades suffered; what time i didn't spend doing mandatory ROTC activities i spent sleeping, or trying to sleep.
Micah didn't go away, though it would have been so easy. even when he called and i couldn't stop crying, he stayed. and i had been so afraid of losing him, as i'd lost others before. so many people in my life had promised they would keep in touch and then seemingly had forgotten me. he calmed my tears, he worked out my stresses, he gave me the strength to fight against my parents and to struggle with the financial aid department for months and months.
now i am about to finish my freshman year of college. i am studying brain & cognitive science with a double major in biology. i want to focus in the study and treatment of mental illnesses such as depression and bipolar disorder. my father has been clinically depressed for more than five years - partially due to the fact that he sacrificed his happiness for a stable career. now, i have finally gotten my family's support, and because of them i will never have to suffer that fate. i will be $60,000 in debt when i graduate from college; but i am studying something i love, at my dream school, surrounded by some of the most incredible research in the world.
for the first time in my life, i can truly say that i am happy. i wake up every morning and even in the face of homework, tests, everything - i am so happy with myself. i happy with the way i look, the way i dress, the way i think, the way i talk. the person i have become in less than a year is so much more than i had ever known i could be - and it's all because of him. because i can wake up in the morning knowing that there is a person as beautiful as him out there in the world. because he has stayed true to his promise that he wouldn't forget me, he wouldn't leave me, he wouldn't disappear. he loves me exactly the way i am - tip to toe.
i really think i must be the luckiest person ever.
here a few more pictures:
a day trip to Chicago over Christmas break
visiting him last October
his visit here over spring break
model shot in Killian Court
the elevator in my dorm
if you've read this far, thanks. i feel a lot better for having written this out. i just needed a good place to write it.
i look forward to reading everyone else's stories :)
My name: augustine
His/Her name (& LJ name if they have one): Micah
I live: in Boston at college, in Milwaukee at home
My age: 19
He/She lives: in St. Louis at college, in Milwaukee at home
His/Her age: 19
Distance: 1200 miles
Together since: July 18 2007
We met: we went to different high schools but had a few common friends. we'd met briefly at Forensics tournaments but never long enough to get names. then last summer, my friend threw the traditional "water fight" party she's had for the last five years, where we all gather up our water balloons and squirt guns and spend an afternoon in an epic gender battle. his friend Nate was invited and didn't know many of the guests, so Nate brought Micah along to keep him company. i cut my foot on a rock during the fight, so i sat down on the curb to stop the bleeding and rest. he sat down next to me and struck up a conversation, and didn't leave my side the rest of the afternoon.
We get to see each other (approximately how often): i'm lucky enough to be going home in less than a week to spend 3 months with him at home; when we're at school, we get to see each other for about 3-4 days at a time every 7 weeks or so.
Future plans: visits when we can afford them, phone calls and video chats when we can't. we're studying in related fields (i'm neurobiology, and he's psychology). we're planning on ending up in the same place for graduate school, and possibly getting married after a few years of short distance.
Share some photos:
our first visit in our long distance relationship
it's strange to think that he and i will get three months together, starting in less than a week. this will be the longest time we'll have had in each other's presence, since we didn't start dating until a month before i left for college.
i am honestly amazed at the incredible person i have in my life, so i thought i would share a few details.
when Micah and i met, i had never been truly happy in a relationship. i thought i knew what love was, but what i really felt was pity and a desire to be needed. i wanted to run away from my life in Milwaukee; i wanted to forget about high school, forget about the people i'd been with, forget the uncertainty and confusion i felt about myself and my life. i planned on coming out to Boston and never looking back. i was signed up as an aero/astronautical engineering major here at MIT and i was enrolled in the Navy ROTC program. my idea was that i would have the Navy foot my college bill, i would become a Naval pilot, and eventually become a part of the NASA astronaut program.
i meant for us to be a summer fling; i just meant to have fun, then forget it. i knew i was falling for him towards the end, but i kept telling myself that we hadn't had enough time to know if it was right. the night before i left for college, we lost our virginity together; i wanted him to know that he had every part of me. i found out later that he had meant to wait until marriage; still, somehow he decided that i was the right person, and he didn't hesitate.
when i left, i promised him that i was all right, and made a real effort to meet new people and try to start the life i had desperately wanted before. he went to his school and we talked a lot, but we began to drift apart. we had said "i love you" but quickly stopped saying it; we were both trying to let go. it wasn't until another girl - his ex-turned-close-friend - confessed that she was in love with him that we began to talk about us again. i told him i still loved him, and through our conversations he came to realize that he still wanted to be with me, in spite of the difficulty and the distance.
i have come so far since then. i realized quickly that ROTC was completely wrong for me; i would be a terrible military officer. i hated the activities, i didn't like the people, the ideas and lessons they taught were repulsive to me. still, if it hadn't been for Micah's support, i would never have had the strength to confront my parents. they nearly disowned me; there were periods last fall when i didn't know if i would ever speak to my father again, or if i would be able to go home. they told me i was throwing away my life. i realized i didn't want to study engineering; the math and the technicalities of it would drive me insane. i was constantly stressed and depressed. my grades suffered; what time i didn't spend doing mandatory ROTC activities i spent sleeping, or trying to sleep.
Micah didn't go away, though it would have been so easy. even when he called and i couldn't stop crying, he stayed. and i had been so afraid of losing him, as i'd lost others before. so many people in my life had promised they would keep in touch and then seemingly had forgotten me. he calmed my tears, he worked out my stresses, he gave me the strength to fight against my parents and to struggle with the financial aid department for months and months.
now i am about to finish my freshman year of college. i am studying brain & cognitive science with a double major in biology. i want to focus in the study and treatment of mental illnesses such as depression and bipolar disorder. my father has been clinically depressed for more than five years - partially due to the fact that he sacrificed his happiness for a stable career. now, i have finally gotten my family's support, and because of them i will never have to suffer that fate. i will be $60,000 in debt when i graduate from college; but i am studying something i love, at my dream school, surrounded by some of the most incredible research in the world.
for the first time in my life, i can truly say that i am happy. i wake up every morning and even in the face of homework, tests, everything - i am so happy with myself. i happy with the way i look, the way i dress, the way i think, the way i talk. the person i have become in less than a year is so much more than i had ever known i could be - and it's all because of him. because i can wake up in the morning knowing that there is a person as beautiful as him out there in the world. because he has stayed true to his promise that he wouldn't forget me, he wouldn't leave me, he wouldn't disappear. he loves me exactly the way i am - tip to toe.
i really think i must be the luckiest person ever.
here a few more pictures:
a day trip to Chicago over Christmas break
visiting him last October
his visit here over spring break
model shot in Killian Court
the elevator in my dorm
if you've read this far, thanks. i feel a lot better for having written this out. i just needed a good place to write it.
i look forward to reading everyone else's stories :)