The evenings are getting cold here again, and the changing weather has intersected with recent events to remind me of the unlikely scenarios that brought me to this town last year. I am often fond of preaching stunning words of wisdom to anyone who happens to fall within earshot, but in an ironic twist, it usually takes months or years of repeating ( Read more... )

I was struck recently by a crushing moment when I realized that my actual impact on things in general is almost exactly the same as that of the obese christian family that now live above me. I still waste my life stuck in traffic. I still stare at the internet for hours while the warm sun is shining. I still prostitute my days away for chump change ( Read more... )

I have noticed a trend in my life, that challenging scenarios which I create for people that I am involved with often recreate themselves in my next relationship, except with a reversal of roles. If I believed in conventional moralist, guilt-based karma, then I would feel that it served me right for making it difficult on people in the past. Good ( Read more... )

A few weeks ago, I quit the deli job with about one day's notice, got paid enough to make rent, and started my new job at an expensive restaurant. I was worried about adapting to a potentially conservative workplace environment, but my concerns were unfounded. As usual, the restaurant job remains the haven for people that need to make more than $15 ( Read more... )

All I can see is fire. The land is on fire. Everyone is on fire. Everything is on fire. All the people run and run and run, but they try so hard to find shelter from the blaze that they never notice that the flames stretch over the horizon. There is no escape. Even if there were still places that had escaped the blaze, the stupid flaming people ( Read more... )

I had forgotten how painful it is to wake up to an alarm. I rejoined the billions of people here who prostitute their days away for pennies, and I spent the last four days doing prep cooking and making sandwiches in a deli downtown. My co-slaves are boring, but they aren't terrible, and the owner is there every day, unloading boxes and working ( Read more... )

The fact that I didn't even know it was a Saturday until a few minutes ago, should testify as to the relative nature of time in my life. I've been spending most of my time alone, in a city where the sun is only out for a handful of hours each day. The days blend together and sweep by at an incredible rate, and I pass them in my room with the door ( Read more... )

The first day of 2006 AD on the western calender has arrived, and as resistant as I may be to the idea, I still find myself slightly retrospective over the last day or so. Last night I walked down to a foot bridge with my best friend and watched the fireworks as we stared out over the lights of downtown. There was no one else around, and we stood ( Read more... )