Glee fic - Courage to Take Control: Part 5 of ? (10ish I think)
Media: Fic
Type: Multi-Part
Title: Courage to Take Control: 5 of ? (10ish)
Rating: R
Word Count: 3,206 (this part)
Genre: General, Drama, Romantic bits
Pairings: Kurt/Blaine established and the focus; but most characters turn up
Spoilers: Nope - although obviously we’re in between s2 and s3. Suspect this might be AUish once s3 starts.
Warning: Nah I don’t reckon.
Disclaimer: I’m borrowing all the characters and universe of Glee. They’re not mine, but I’m grateful to have a little play-time with them J
Summary: Blaine wants to transfer to McKinley for senior year. Kurt, of all people, is against it. This chapter, Burt finds out about Blaine’s plan, and Kurt finally realizes why he’s so against it.
[Chapter 1] | [Chapter 2] | [Chapter 3] | [Chapter 4]
-------------------
Chapter 5
Kurt loved cooking with Carole. It was relaxing, comforting and challenging all at once. He loved cooking, period, and loved teaching his dad how to cook different recipes, but cooking with Carole meant an equal amount of sharing information and learning from one another, which he relished. Her tweaks and nuanced understanding of flavours - almost instinctual - made him jealous and bore results that he could never achieve even in following the best recipes. Still, he wasn’t entirely onboard with Carole’s latest idea.
“Chicken livers?!” Kurt asked again, not sure he’d heard correctly. “In a bolognese sauce?”
“I’m not kidding,” Carole laughed in response to Kurt’s shocked and disbelieving face. “If I hadn’t have told you, you never would have known. And every time I’ve cooked bolognese, I’ve put them in!”
“But what does it do to the flavour exactly?” Kurt was holding the wooden spoon mid-air, still a little afraid to move it up to his lips.
“It just smooths and balances it out, reducing the acidity,” Carole stirred the pot that had been simmering for nearly an hour as she spoke and checked on the spaghetti bubbling away next to it in another pot. “You know how I add a glass of white wine to the sauce to reduce the sweetness of the tomato? Well this tempers the acidity of the wine after the alcohol has burnt off.”
“Hm,” Kurt tilted his head in acknowledgement of the logic. “I guess if I’ve been enjoying your special secret bolognese recipe for months then now’s not the time to start questioning it.” He put the wooden spoon to his mouth. “Oh my god I think this is the best sauce ever!”
Carole grinned shyly. “Well to be honest, I’ve never put actual chicken livers in before tonight - usually I use pate instead because it’s less detectable. But chicken livers give a better flavour.”
Kurt froze for a moment, now empty wooden spoon still mid-air on its way back to the pot, and then shrugged. “Well it truly tastes excellent so I’m sold on the idea. I’d just suggest we don’t tell dad though.”
“Or Finn,” Carole laughed. “Speak of the devils,” she added as headlights from the driveway shone into the kitchen before going dark as Burt stopped the car. “Let’s get this stuff on the table so we can eat before the Sex And The City marathon starts, shall we?”
Kurt and Carole busied themselves with the final preparations as Finn and Burt bounded through The front door, exuberant after a batting session at the baseball nets.
“Yes! Bolognese,” Finn exclaimed, nostrils flaring as he sniffed the air in the kitchen. “You’re the best, Mom,” he said, hugging her quickly before going to get changed.
Burt followed him into the kitchen, leaned in to peck Carole on the cheek then patted Kurt’s shoulder. “Hey buddy,” he said, looking a bit tired. “You good?” He was looking at Kurt carefully, as if he though Kurt wouldn’t be ok for some reason.
“Yeah Dad, hi,” Kurt said breezily. “now go wash up - tonight’s bolognese is Carole’s best yet and I don’t know how long we can wait before starting - the smell is deliciously intoxicating, don’t you think?” He and Carole shared a wink as Burt took his cue and also headed up the stairs.
Kurt’s phone buzzed in his pocket and he took it out to look at the message.
Missing you.
He smiled, going slightly pink as he did every time he thought of Blaine. He quickly texted back:
Missing you more, my love. About to sit down to dinner. Bolognese with chicken livers - surprisingly good.
Blaine’s reply came just as Burt and Finn shuffled into the kitchen and sat around the table.
I’ll bet, especially if you had anything to do with making it. Talk later.
Kurt put the phone back in his pocket and grabbed the bowl of pasta, setting it down on the table before taking his place next to Finn.
The atmosphere in the house was light and warm, but Finn and Burt were exchanging glances that Kurt noticed as he dished out the pasta, passing each plate to Carole to add the sauce.
“What have you two been up to?” Kurt asked suspiciously, eyeing first his father, then Finn. “I know that look - and it usually means there’s a conspiracy.”
“Nooo… mmmmh… no... mmmmh yum... no conspiracy,” Finn said between shovels of food entering his mouth.
“Don’t look at me,” Burt said defensively, reaching for the salt only for Kurt to swat his hand away with a disapproving look.
“This sauce does not require any additional flavours, Dad,” he scolded, “and besides you know how I feel about salt - for you especially.”
Burt grimaced but retracted his hand obediently. The four of them ate in silence for a couple of minutes, sounds of hunger and approval emanating from Finn in particular.
“There was one thing I wanted to ask,” Finn said after slurping a particularly long strand of spaghetti into his mouth, the sauce attached flicking onto his cheek causing Carole to reach over with a napkin to clear it off. “When were you going to tell me that Blaine’s transferring to McKinley?”
Carole’s fork stopped mid-air, her mouth half open as she looked first at Finn, then Kurt, and then to Burt. Obviously Burt and Finn had already discussed this, as Burt didn’t look shocked. At the same time, he looked uncomfortable at the topic of conversation, but said nothing, waiting for Kurt to speak.
“I mean, I like the guy, and Rachel’s thrilled about singing every song ever written with him in Glee Club,” Finn continued, not meeting Kurt’s eye, “but what happens if you guys have a fight or break up? Would he go back to Dalton then?”
Kurt bristled and let his fork drop onto his plate, clanging loudly. “I see Rachel’s been spreading the gospel according to her,” he said coolly. “I’m not sure I understand what you’re getting at, Finn,” he added, knowing full well what Finn was implying.
“I think what Finn means,” Burt said hesitantly, “is that it doesn’t make much sense just to transfer for senior year - especially when it’s not like you two live on different planets. You see him all the time - god knows he spends so much time here sometimes I think we have a third son.”
Kurt felt indignation turn to anger, his jaw tightening. He placed both his hands on the edge of the table and gripped at it, holding his temper as best he could.
“I know it hard to be apart from someone you love, Kurt,” Carole added, sympathetically, “but is transferring to McKinley really the best thing for Blaine? Dalton is a very good school…”
“I can’t BELIEVE this!” Kurt barked suddenly, pounding both fists on the table and making everyone jump. “Why do you all automatically assume this was MY idea - or that I even think it’s a GOOD idea?!” He glared at the three of them, daring them to say anything. Sensibly, they stayed silent. “I KNOW it’s stupid idea. I KNOW he should stay at Dalton, lead the Warblers, ace his SATs and get early acceptance to some amazing school that I could only dream of being able to afford to attend. You think I don’t KNOW that?! NO! It was NOT my idea - and if Rachel had told Finn the whole story rather than the Chinese whispers version he would have known that!” Kurt’s eyes bore into Finn accusingly. “Believe me, I’ve TRIED talking him out of it but he’s determined and we’re in love so I’ll support him because that’s what boyfriends do…” He refused to look at his father, bitterly disappointed that he would so readily believe what he clearly believed. “Don’t for a MINUTE think this is me being some moronic lovesick fairytale character who just can’t possibly survive without his boyfriend constantly with him every second of the day - because the truth is my feelings about this transfer are about as far on the other side of the spectrum as you can get.”
Kurt stood up, pushing the chair back so violently it clattered across the floor and into the cupboards behind him. “I’m not hungry anymore,” he snapped, “I’m going to my room.” He stalked out into the hall and up the stairs, throwing one last comment their way before disappearing out of earshot. “Enjoy your bolognese - the secret ingredient is chicken livers.”
Finn made a face and placed his fork back down on the plate, unsure how to proceed from there, while Burt and Carole shared a meaningful look.
“There’s something more going on,” Carole said to Burt quietly.
“Uh-huh,” Burt said, already getting up from his chair and heading to the hall to follow Kurt.
When Burt reached Kurt’s door, he paused. He could hear Kurt moving about inside, pacing across the space - probably from his wardrobe to the window and back again by the length of his steps. Burt knew if he knocked on the door he would only get an angry bark in response, so instead just opened the door enough to pop his head in.
“Kurt…”
“I don’t want to hear it Dad, I’m that angry right now.” Kurt didn’t look up, instead increasing the speed of his pacing and starting to slap the door to his wardrobe in frustration each time he turned.
“Even if I say that I was wrong - outta line?” Burt asked, undeterred. “I’m not perfect you know - I shouldn’t have taken Finn’s word from something Rachel said and believed it like that. I honestly don’t know what I was thinking. The minute he told me I shoulda talked to you - and just you - to hear your side of this.”
“Yep,” Kurt snapped. He slapped the wardrobe door again, harder, but when he turned his pace was slowing.
“So can I hear it from you?” Burt asked, glad to see finally Kurt was reducing his pace. He took the cue to enter the room, closing the door behind him, and perching on the end of the bed. “What’s going on, kid?”
Kurt stopped next to his wardrobe again, turned slowly and leant against it for a moment before sliding down until he was sitting against the door, hugging his knees and facing his father.
“Well the facts are simple enough,” he began. “Blaine is set on transferring to McKinley for Senior Year.”
Burt just nodded, but didn’t say anything.
“He’s swears it’s not for us to be together,” Kurt continued. “His parents have been pressuring him a lot about college and his future - Ivy League, pre-law or pre-med - but he’s got it in his head that he’s living in a cocoon, having run away from his past; and that to be true to himself he needs to get back into the ‘real world’ - and since going back to his old school isn’t an option, he says he needs to come to McKinley.”
Burt knew the basics of Blaine’s transfer to Dalton, but nothing specific. It wasn’t the time to push, but a thought did occur to him. “Maybe he does,” he said.
Kurt looked up sharply. “What?”
“Maybe,” Burt said slowly, scratching his head as if it would release some added wisdom, “maybe he needs to do this to really move on from what happened at his old school; to realise that he’s stronger now; to know that he did the right thing in transferring to Dalton.”
“Of course he did the right thing!” Kurt gasped. “He was assaulted, Dad.”
“So were you,” Burt said quickly. “Maybe not in the same way, but don’t ever underestimate what you went through last year Kurt. You in no way deserved it and we - you - did the right thing in leaving that school, even if it was for a short time. You were able to go back. You said Blaine can’t go back, but maybe he needs to move on at least - out of the cocoon as you say. Maybe he is ready to emerge from the safety of Dalton; just like you were.”
“But did he have to choose McKinley?” Kurt said quietly, his voice wavering. “You know how it’s going to look to everyone - you jumped to the same conclusion.”
“Is that really what you’re worried about?” Burt asked. “The Kurt I know makes a point of not letting what other people think stop him, especially if they’re wrong about it.”
Kurt opened and closed his mouth a couple of times. He’d avoided thinking about this - about why exactly he was so against the idea? No matter what happened, people would assume Blaine was transferring for him; whether at his own initiative or at Kurt’s request. But they could think what they wanted. There were worse things going through the minds of the general population of that school. Then Kurt thought back to their visit to Mr Schuester’s apartment, and the way Blaine had looked at him when he’d made the scathing comment about Rachel spending time with Mr Schuester during the summer, the fear he’d felt at that moment came rushing up, haunting his expression.
“No,” Kurt whispered, “that’s not what I’m scared of.” He lifted his palms from where they’d been resting by his sides and interlocked his fingers, resting his hands on his knees. “We’re in love, you know Dad.” Kurt looked up at his father, a shy smile colouring his face. “He told me he loved me just after I got back from Nationals - and I said it back.”
Burt smiled. He hadn’t known that, but it didn’t surprise him. Kurt was so passionate, and Blaine so enraptured - the gazes he directed at Kurt were the picture of adoration. There was no question of it.
Kurt continued: “It just still feels like, sometimes, like maybe it’s not real - like it’s too good to be true - and at any moment Blaine will find something out about me that is so appalling he’ll change his mind.” Kurt started wringing his hands and his voice grew higher. “And today… I said something really mean to Rachel because I was irritated and insecure and just being a bitch and Blaine looked at me like… like he didn’t even know me,” Kurt’s voice was starting to break, threatening to turn into sobs. “I mean, five minutes later everything was apparently fine and we were on our way to get iced coffee at the Lima Bean, but what if next time I snap at Rachel, or someone else, in Glee Club, at McKinley, and Blaine’s there because he’s transferred, and suddenly realises what a horrible person I can am?! I couldn’t stand losing him, I can’t stand the thought of losing him but... I’m my own worst enemy.”
“Kurt, Kurt, calm down,” Burt moved from the bed and sat down next to Kurt, leaning against the wall next to the wardrobe. “You said it yourself, you two are in love. You love him, and he loves you.”
Kurt was listening, barely daring to breathe.
“Do you love everything about Blaine?” Burt asked him, eyebrow raised.
“Yes,” Kurt said without even needing to think.
“Would you still love him if he did something you didn’t like - and I don’t mean this transfer - I mean if he did something that shocked you?”
“Yes,” Kurt said, after only a moment’s hesitation. “I would. Without question. I love Blaine, for all his faults.”
“So why do you think he would love you any less for being you?” Burt asked. “If he loves you, which you and I agree he does, then what school he goes to for senior year is not going to change that.”
“And if it’s a disaster? For him I mean…” Kurt looked up to the ceiling, voicing his other fear. “What if he gets bullied again; what if he gets beaten up…”
“If that happens, at McKinley or anywhere else in the future - god forbid - it won’t be your fault Kurt, and it won’t be his either.” Burt said solemnly. “I respect the strength it takes - strength you had and strength Blaine now has - to face the world and it’s dangers. You were and are brave. It’s scary to know there are people out there who could hurt you just because of who you are; and it not something I coulda dealt with at your age. You’re the bravest guy I know, Kurt.”
“People are still going to think he’s just transferring to be with me,” Kurt leant his head back against the wardrobe door, before letting it slide to the side until he was resting on Burt’s shoulder.
“Probably,” Burt admitted. “And to be honest, it’s probably a part of why he wants to transfer; but that doesn’t mean he shouldn’t do it. Part of him was probably encouraged to face his fears and transfer to McKinley as an excuse to be with you, but that doesn’t mean it’s a bad idea to do it. Sometimes that’s how the world works - you go for what you want, and end up getting what you need - if they’re the same thing then that’s just a happy coincidence.” Burt paused, then asked, “I take it Blaine is determined to do this?”
Kurt expelled a short breath and laugh at that. “Oh yeah…” he nodded. “I think ‘determination’ might be the Anderson family motto or something.”
“And you love him,” Burt added, with a smile.
“That I do.” Kurt nodded, feeling lighter at the thought.
“So go and tell him you support him, and explain why you’re really hesitant about this transfer idea.” Burt said, tilting his head towards the door. “He’s probably panicking that you don’t want him at McKinley.
Kurt blinked for a moment, looking at Burt in confusion. “But I’ve told him it’s not that!”
Burt laughed. “If the situation were reversed, would that stop you from obsessing about it in private?” He raised his eyebrow at Kurt. “I didn’t think so.” With creaky knees and a grunt, Burt hoisted himself off the ground, holding a hand out to Kurt. “Go talk to him, Kurt. Neither of you are mind-readers - you need to talk.”
Kurt smoothed his shirt down and looked at his father. “Of course you’re right,” he said.
“That’s cos I’m the Dad,” Burt said, pulling Kurt into a hug. “It don’t matter how old you get, or who else there is to take care of you… I’m still the Dad.”
They broke apart and exited Kurt’s room, and walked down the stairs together.
“So, there’s really chicken livers in the bolognese sauce?” Burt said, impressed.
“Yup - apparently Carole’s been putting them in forever and just never told us.” Kurt said with a smile. “You think Finn’ll get over it?”
“More for me if he doesn’t,” Burt shrugged.
They laughed and Burt patted Kurt’s arm as they parted ways in the foyer downstairs. “Be home by midnight, k?”
“Yes Dad, Cinderella will be back before the chariot turns into a pumpkin,” Kurt rolled his eyes. He grabbed his keys and went out the door, pausing to add over his shoulder: “And thanks.”
“Anytime, buddy, anytime.” Burt watched Kurt get to his car and drive down the street.
[Chapter 6]
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Author’s Note: Ah the pressure of writing Kurt/Burt - so many have done such wonderful things with their relationship that this can only pale in comparison... but no matter - it will suffice, they’re still adorable, and we’re all here and moving on. Next time, Mr Anderson gets a turn at fatherly advice, and Kurt gets a plan
Type: Multi-Part
Title: Courage to Take Control: 5 of ? (10ish)
Rating: R
Word Count: 3,206 (this part)
Genre: General, Drama, Romantic bits
Pairings: Kurt/Blaine established and the focus; but most characters turn up
Spoilers: Nope - although obviously we’re in between s2 and s3. Suspect this might be AUish once s3 starts.
Warning: Nah I don’t reckon.
Disclaimer: I’m borrowing all the characters and universe of Glee. They’re not mine, but I’m grateful to have a little play-time with them J
Summary: Blaine wants to transfer to McKinley for senior year. Kurt, of all people, is against it. This chapter, Burt finds out about Blaine’s plan, and Kurt finally realizes why he’s so against it.
[Chapter 1] | [Chapter 2] | [Chapter 3] | [Chapter 4]
-------------------
Chapter 5
Kurt loved cooking with Carole. It was relaxing, comforting and challenging all at once. He loved cooking, period, and loved teaching his dad how to cook different recipes, but cooking with Carole meant an equal amount of sharing information and learning from one another, which he relished. Her tweaks and nuanced understanding of flavours - almost instinctual - made him jealous and bore results that he could never achieve even in following the best recipes. Still, he wasn’t entirely onboard with Carole’s latest idea.
“Chicken livers?!” Kurt asked again, not sure he’d heard correctly. “In a bolognese sauce?”
“I’m not kidding,” Carole laughed in response to Kurt’s shocked and disbelieving face. “If I hadn’t have told you, you never would have known. And every time I’ve cooked bolognese, I’ve put them in!”
“But what does it do to the flavour exactly?” Kurt was holding the wooden spoon mid-air, still a little afraid to move it up to his lips.
“It just smooths and balances it out, reducing the acidity,” Carole stirred the pot that had been simmering for nearly an hour as she spoke and checked on the spaghetti bubbling away next to it in another pot. “You know how I add a glass of white wine to the sauce to reduce the sweetness of the tomato? Well this tempers the acidity of the wine after the alcohol has burnt off.”
“Hm,” Kurt tilted his head in acknowledgement of the logic. “I guess if I’ve been enjoying your special secret bolognese recipe for months then now’s not the time to start questioning it.” He put the wooden spoon to his mouth. “Oh my god I think this is the best sauce ever!”
Carole grinned shyly. “Well to be honest, I’ve never put actual chicken livers in before tonight - usually I use pate instead because it’s less detectable. But chicken livers give a better flavour.”
Kurt froze for a moment, now empty wooden spoon still mid-air on its way back to the pot, and then shrugged. “Well it truly tastes excellent so I’m sold on the idea. I’d just suggest we don’t tell dad though.”
“Or Finn,” Carole laughed. “Speak of the devils,” she added as headlights from the driveway shone into the kitchen before going dark as Burt stopped the car. “Let’s get this stuff on the table so we can eat before the Sex And The City marathon starts, shall we?”
Kurt and Carole busied themselves with the final preparations as Finn and Burt bounded through The front door, exuberant after a batting session at the baseball nets.
“Yes! Bolognese,” Finn exclaimed, nostrils flaring as he sniffed the air in the kitchen. “You’re the best, Mom,” he said, hugging her quickly before going to get changed.
Burt followed him into the kitchen, leaned in to peck Carole on the cheek then patted Kurt’s shoulder. “Hey buddy,” he said, looking a bit tired. “You good?” He was looking at Kurt carefully, as if he though Kurt wouldn’t be ok for some reason.
“Yeah Dad, hi,” Kurt said breezily. “now go wash up - tonight’s bolognese is Carole’s best yet and I don’t know how long we can wait before starting - the smell is deliciously intoxicating, don’t you think?” He and Carole shared a wink as Burt took his cue and also headed up the stairs.
Kurt’s phone buzzed in his pocket and he took it out to look at the message.
Missing you.
He smiled, going slightly pink as he did every time he thought of Blaine. He quickly texted back:
Missing you more, my love. About to sit down to dinner. Bolognese with chicken livers - surprisingly good.
Blaine’s reply came just as Burt and Finn shuffled into the kitchen and sat around the table.
I’ll bet, especially if you had anything to do with making it. Talk later.
Kurt put the phone back in his pocket and grabbed the bowl of pasta, setting it down on the table before taking his place next to Finn.
The atmosphere in the house was light and warm, but Finn and Burt were exchanging glances that Kurt noticed as he dished out the pasta, passing each plate to Carole to add the sauce.
“What have you two been up to?” Kurt asked suspiciously, eyeing first his father, then Finn. “I know that look - and it usually means there’s a conspiracy.”
“Nooo… mmmmh… no... mmmmh yum... no conspiracy,” Finn said between shovels of food entering his mouth.
“Don’t look at me,” Burt said defensively, reaching for the salt only for Kurt to swat his hand away with a disapproving look.
“This sauce does not require any additional flavours, Dad,” he scolded, “and besides you know how I feel about salt - for you especially.”
Burt grimaced but retracted his hand obediently. The four of them ate in silence for a couple of minutes, sounds of hunger and approval emanating from Finn in particular.
“There was one thing I wanted to ask,” Finn said after slurping a particularly long strand of spaghetti into his mouth, the sauce attached flicking onto his cheek causing Carole to reach over with a napkin to clear it off. “When were you going to tell me that Blaine’s transferring to McKinley?”
Carole’s fork stopped mid-air, her mouth half open as she looked first at Finn, then Kurt, and then to Burt. Obviously Burt and Finn had already discussed this, as Burt didn’t look shocked. At the same time, he looked uncomfortable at the topic of conversation, but said nothing, waiting for Kurt to speak.
“I mean, I like the guy, and Rachel’s thrilled about singing every song ever written with him in Glee Club,” Finn continued, not meeting Kurt’s eye, “but what happens if you guys have a fight or break up? Would he go back to Dalton then?”
Kurt bristled and let his fork drop onto his plate, clanging loudly. “I see Rachel’s been spreading the gospel according to her,” he said coolly. “I’m not sure I understand what you’re getting at, Finn,” he added, knowing full well what Finn was implying.
“I think what Finn means,” Burt said hesitantly, “is that it doesn’t make much sense just to transfer for senior year - especially when it’s not like you two live on different planets. You see him all the time - god knows he spends so much time here sometimes I think we have a third son.”
Kurt felt indignation turn to anger, his jaw tightening. He placed both his hands on the edge of the table and gripped at it, holding his temper as best he could.
“I know it hard to be apart from someone you love, Kurt,” Carole added, sympathetically, “but is transferring to McKinley really the best thing for Blaine? Dalton is a very good school…”
“I can’t BELIEVE this!” Kurt barked suddenly, pounding both fists on the table and making everyone jump. “Why do you all automatically assume this was MY idea - or that I even think it’s a GOOD idea?!” He glared at the three of them, daring them to say anything. Sensibly, they stayed silent. “I KNOW it’s stupid idea. I KNOW he should stay at Dalton, lead the Warblers, ace his SATs and get early acceptance to some amazing school that I could only dream of being able to afford to attend. You think I don’t KNOW that?! NO! It was NOT my idea - and if Rachel had told Finn the whole story rather than the Chinese whispers version he would have known that!” Kurt’s eyes bore into Finn accusingly. “Believe me, I’ve TRIED talking him out of it but he’s determined and we’re in love so I’ll support him because that’s what boyfriends do…” He refused to look at his father, bitterly disappointed that he would so readily believe what he clearly believed. “Don’t for a MINUTE think this is me being some moronic lovesick fairytale character who just can’t possibly survive without his boyfriend constantly with him every second of the day - because the truth is my feelings about this transfer are about as far on the other side of the spectrum as you can get.”
Kurt stood up, pushing the chair back so violently it clattered across the floor and into the cupboards behind him. “I’m not hungry anymore,” he snapped, “I’m going to my room.” He stalked out into the hall and up the stairs, throwing one last comment their way before disappearing out of earshot. “Enjoy your bolognese - the secret ingredient is chicken livers.”
Finn made a face and placed his fork back down on the plate, unsure how to proceed from there, while Burt and Carole shared a meaningful look.
“There’s something more going on,” Carole said to Burt quietly.
“Uh-huh,” Burt said, already getting up from his chair and heading to the hall to follow Kurt.
When Burt reached Kurt’s door, he paused. He could hear Kurt moving about inside, pacing across the space - probably from his wardrobe to the window and back again by the length of his steps. Burt knew if he knocked on the door he would only get an angry bark in response, so instead just opened the door enough to pop his head in.
“Kurt…”
“I don’t want to hear it Dad, I’m that angry right now.” Kurt didn’t look up, instead increasing the speed of his pacing and starting to slap the door to his wardrobe in frustration each time he turned.
“Even if I say that I was wrong - outta line?” Burt asked, undeterred. “I’m not perfect you know - I shouldn’t have taken Finn’s word from something Rachel said and believed it like that. I honestly don’t know what I was thinking. The minute he told me I shoulda talked to you - and just you - to hear your side of this.”
“Yep,” Kurt snapped. He slapped the wardrobe door again, harder, but when he turned his pace was slowing.
“So can I hear it from you?” Burt asked, glad to see finally Kurt was reducing his pace. He took the cue to enter the room, closing the door behind him, and perching on the end of the bed. “What’s going on, kid?”
Kurt stopped next to his wardrobe again, turned slowly and leant against it for a moment before sliding down until he was sitting against the door, hugging his knees and facing his father.
“Well the facts are simple enough,” he began. “Blaine is set on transferring to McKinley for Senior Year.”
Burt just nodded, but didn’t say anything.
“He’s swears it’s not for us to be together,” Kurt continued. “His parents have been pressuring him a lot about college and his future - Ivy League, pre-law or pre-med - but he’s got it in his head that he’s living in a cocoon, having run away from his past; and that to be true to himself he needs to get back into the ‘real world’ - and since going back to his old school isn’t an option, he says he needs to come to McKinley.”
Burt knew the basics of Blaine’s transfer to Dalton, but nothing specific. It wasn’t the time to push, but a thought did occur to him. “Maybe he does,” he said.
Kurt looked up sharply. “What?”
“Maybe,” Burt said slowly, scratching his head as if it would release some added wisdom, “maybe he needs to do this to really move on from what happened at his old school; to realise that he’s stronger now; to know that he did the right thing in transferring to Dalton.”
“Of course he did the right thing!” Kurt gasped. “He was assaulted, Dad.”
“So were you,” Burt said quickly. “Maybe not in the same way, but don’t ever underestimate what you went through last year Kurt. You in no way deserved it and we - you - did the right thing in leaving that school, even if it was for a short time. You were able to go back. You said Blaine can’t go back, but maybe he needs to move on at least - out of the cocoon as you say. Maybe he is ready to emerge from the safety of Dalton; just like you were.”
“But did he have to choose McKinley?” Kurt said quietly, his voice wavering. “You know how it’s going to look to everyone - you jumped to the same conclusion.”
“Is that really what you’re worried about?” Burt asked. “The Kurt I know makes a point of not letting what other people think stop him, especially if they’re wrong about it.”
Kurt opened and closed his mouth a couple of times. He’d avoided thinking about this - about why exactly he was so against the idea? No matter what happened, people would assume Blaine was transferring for him; whether at his own initiative or at Kurt’s request. But they could think what they wanted. There were worse things going through the minds of the general population of that school. Then Kurt thought back to their visit to Mr Schuester’s apartment, and the way Blaine had looked at him when he’d made the scathing comment about Rachel spending time with Mr Schuester during the summer, the fear he’d felt at that moment came rushing up, haunting his expression.
“No,” Kurt whispered, “that’s not what I’m scared of.” He lifted his palms from where they’d been resting by his sides and interlocked his fingers, resting his hands on his knees. “We’re in love, you know Dad.” Kurt looked up at his father, a shy smile colouring his face. “He told me he loved me just after I got back from Nationals - and I said it back.”
Burt smiled. He hadn’t known that, but it didn’t surprise him. Kurt was so passionate, and Blaine so enraptured - the gazes he directed at Kurt were the picture of adoration. There was no question of it.
Kurt continued: “It just still feels like, sometimes, like maybe it’s not real - like it’s too good to be true - and at any moment Blaine will find something out about me that is so appalling he’ll change his mind.” Kurt started wringing his hands and his voice grew higher. “And today… I said something really mean to Rachel because I was irritated and insecure and just being a bitch and Blaine looked at me like… like he didn’t even know me,” Kurt’s voice was starting to break, threatening to turn into sobs. “I mean, five minutes later everything was apparently fine and we were on our way to get iced coffee at the Lima Bean, but what if next time I snap at Rachel, or someone else, in Glee Club, at McKinley, and Blaine’s there because he’s transferred, and suddenly realises what a horrible person I can am?! I couldn’t stand losing him, I can’t stand the thought of losing him but... I’m my own worst enemy.”
“Kurt, Kurt, calm down,” Burt moved from the bed and sat down next to Kurt, leaning against the wall next to the wardrobe. “You said it yourself, you two are in love. You love him, and he loves you.”
Kurt was listening, barely daring to breathe.
“Do you love everything about Blaine?” Burt asked him, eyebrow raised.
“Yes,” Kurt said without even needing to think.
“Would you still love him if he did something you didn’t like - and I don’t mean this transfer - I mean if he did something that shocked you?”
“Yes,” Kurt said, after only a moment’s hesitation. “I would. Without question. I love Blaine, for all his faults.”
“So why do you think he would love you any less for being you?” Burt asked. “If he loves you, which you and I agree he does, then what school he goes to for senior year is not going to change that.”
“And if it’s a disaster? For him I mean…” Kurt looked up to the ceiling, voicing his other fear. “What if he gets bullied again; what if he gets beaten up…”
“If that happens, at McKinley or anywhere else in the future - god forbid - it won’t be your fault Kurt, and it won’t be his either.” Burt said solemnly. “I respect the strength it takes - strength you had and strength Blaine now has - to face the world and it’s dangers. You were and are brave. It’s scary to know there are people out there who could hurt you just because of who you are; and it not something I coulda dealt with at your age. You’re the bravest guy I know, Kurt.”
“People are still going to think he’s just transferring to be with me,” Kurt leant his head back against the wardrobe door, before letting it slide to the side until he was resting on Burt’s shoulder.
“Probably,” Burt admitted. “And to be honest, it’s probably a part of why he wants to transfer; but that doesn’t mean he shouldn’t do it. Part of him was probably encouraged to face his fears and transfer to McKinley as an excuse to be with you, but that doesn’t mean it’s a bad idea to do it. Sometimes that’s how the world works - you go for what you want, and end up getting what you need - if they’re the same thing then that’s just a happy coincidence.” Burt paused, then asked, “I take it Blaine is determined to do this?”
Kurt expelled a short breath and laugh at that. “Oh yeah…” he nodded. “I think ‘determination’ might be the Anderson family motto or something.”
“And you love him,” Burt added, with a smile.
“That I do.” Kurt nodded, feeling lighter at the thought.
“So go and tell him you support him, and explain why you’re really hesitant about this transfer idea.” Burt said, tilting his head towards the door. “He’s probably panicking that you don’t want him at McKinley.
Kurt blinked for a moment, looking at Burt in confusion. “But I’ve told him it’s not that!”
Burt laughed. “If the situation were reversed, would that stop you from obsessing about it in private?” He raised his eyebrow at Kurt. “I didn’t think so.” With creaky knees and a grunt, Burt hoisted himself off the ground, holding a hand out to Kurt. “Go talk to him, Kurt. Neither of you are mind-readers - you need to talk.”
Kurt smoothed his shirt down and looked at his father. “Of course you’re right,” he said.
“That’s cos I’m the Dad,” Burt said, pulling Kurt into a hug. “It don’t matter how old you get, or who else there is to take care of you… I’m still the Dad.”
They broke apart and exited Kurt’s room, and walked down the stairs together.
“So, there’s really chicken livers in the bolognese sauce?” Burt said, impressed.
“Yup - apparently Carole’s been putting them in forever and just never told us.” Kurt said with a smile. “You think Finn’ll get over it?”
“More for me if he doesn’t,” Burt shrugged.
They laughed and Burt patted Kurt’s arm as they parted ways in the foyer downstairs. “Be home by midnight, k?”
“Yes Dad, Cinderella will be back before the chariot turns into a pumpkin,” Kurt rolled his eyes. He grabbed his keys and went out the door, pausing to add over his shoulder: “And thanks.”
“Anytime, buddy, anytime.” Burt watched Kurt get to his car and drive down the street.
[Chapter 6]
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Author’s Note: Ah the pressure of writing Kurt/Burt - so many have done such wonderful things with their relationship that this can only pale in comparison... but no matter - it will suffice, they’re still adorable, and we’re all here and moving on. Next time, Mr Anderson gets a turn at fatherly advice, and Kurt gets a plan