At my dad's funeral last year (stateside, he was a 20-year Air Force veteran), the VFW sent out an six-man honor guard that did the flag thing, played Taps, and did a three-gun salute. Afterward, they not only gave us the flag, but the spent shells from the salute. Granted, this wasn't overseas, but you don't have to be a VIP to have the gun salute.)
I read a article some months back about a man who was married to a male veteran (I think they were both vets) and how the military (I think army) reacted when his husband died... which came down to "they were great". Along the lines of "if we're going to do it at all, we're going to do it right".
Don't know if that's typical, but it wouldn't surprise me.
Second estelwen: someone in the UK who has served in a foreign country's armed services isn't a British veteran (even if he's actually a UK citizen). Therefore, if he dies the British military have no business giving him a British military funeral (BTW, I think that's probably a better search term than 'British military burial'). Indeed, it would be a downright impertinence for them to do so
( ... )
And in any case, over here we don't normally hold military funerals for men who simply happen to have served in the armed forces years ago. (If we did, an entire generation of British men who served in WWII and did National Service in the 18 years following would have had military funerals!) Those are mostly reserved for people who die while in service. The funeral of a veterans who was a member of a veterans' association would certainly be attended by representatives of the association, and probably the local British Legion, but that would be about it, unless he had been some very special hero or had spent the rest of his life involved with the forces in some way.IME, WWII veterans (which would be the overwhelming majority of male American born between 1915 and 1925) generally do not have actual "military funerals" as nearly all of them identify more with their family and church (or equivalent) which have been their lives in the intervening decades. But they would still often request (or have requested on their behalf) an honor
( ... )
Another cultural difference between the two sides of the pond. Nobody over here dreams of requesting an honour guard and flag just because he was a serviceman half a century ago. But then again, many of them have maintained a relationship with their old regiment/corps/ship ever since through its old comrades association, and it is this association that is felt to be the appropriate body to honour the departed at the funeral.
Yeah, US/UK views of military service are wildly different; your perspective seems callous to me and I'm sure ours seems attention-getting to you. Which brings up the very valid point that the OP's character quite likely would view an honor guard from a more British perspective, and refuse it on the grounds of being unnecessary and ostentatious in the culture he has become accustomed to.
I'm awaiting the answers with curiosity because I am really confused by this question. If the man is a veteran who has been living in the UK for decades, why is he having a military burial at all, particularly if there is a chance of causing offence to his husband? (After you posted this question, I googled 'military funerals' and note that the US Dept of Veterans Affairs provide military funerals "upon the family's request".) And if he is an American citizen, and an American veteran, why would British military customs be at all relevant? And he wouldn't have a Union Jack on his coffin, would he?
The two British ex-military men I knew (service in WWII), both of whom had links with veterans' organisations relevant to their branch of service, had ordinary non-military cremations, with no suggestion that anything else would happen. Note too, that cremation is much more common in the UK than burial.
I do hope my comments and ignorance haven't caused any offence to anyone, and I await further answers with interest.
Thank you for your information about cremation! That was something I hadn't considered.
As an aside, the question concerning the Union memorial flag is for another character, who is British. I'm sorry, I didn't make that clear in the original request. ^^;; The American character would, of course, have an American memorial flag.
Don't worry, there's no offense, no ignorance! I want to thank you actually, anon.
One of my characters is a US veteran, who still retains his American citizenship, but has lived in the UK for decades and is buried there. How would they conduct his funeral?
However he (or his next of kin) like.
Would US military personell conduct the ceremony
Unless there are extremely unusual circumstances, he would have the same funeral/mass/burial/etc. as any other non-veteran; the only difference is that he (likely) will be eligible to have an honor guard and the relevant branch will do what it can to provide it if requested. The honor guard would be present during the actual burial and would fold the flag and possibly play Taps. UK military would have nothing to do with this since he never served with them. Personnel would be provided from a US military base in the UK, if possible.
Also, this character is gay, and has been in an official partership since 2005 (married in the US in 2009), though he has been with his partner for decades. I want the military officials to present his memorial flag to his brother, who then
( ... )
Comments 16
(The comment has been removed)
I had a feeling that they would send two Americans to do it, but I wanted to be sure.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Don't know if that's typical, but it wouldn't surprise me.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
The two British ex-military men I knew (service in WWII), both of whom had links with veterans' organisations relevant to their branch of service, had ordinary non-military cremations, with no suggestion that anything else would happen. Note too, that cremation is much more common in the UK than burial.
I do hope my comments and ignorance haven't caused any offence to anyone, and I await further answers with interest.
Philo
Reply
As an aside, the question concerning the Union memorial flag is for another character, who is British. I'm sorry, I didn't make that clear in the original request. ^^;; The American character would, of course, have an American memorial flag.
Don't worry, there's no offense, no ignorance! I want to thank you actually, anon.
Reply
However he (or his next of kin) like.
Would US military personell conduct the ceremony
Unless there are extremely unusual circumstances, he would have the same funeral/mass/burial/etc. as any other non-veteran; the only difference is that he (likely) will be eligible to have an honor guard and the relevant branch will do what it can to provide it if requested. The honor guard would be present during the actual burial and would fold the flag and possibly play Taps. UK military would have nothing to do with this since he never served with them. Personnel would be provided from a US military base in the UK, if possible.
Also, this character is gay, and has been in an official partership since 2005 (married in the US in 2009), though he has been with his partner for decades. I want the military officials to present his memorial flag to his brother, who then ( ... )
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment