A Learning Process [16]
Title: A Learning Process
Beta: atriums
Pairing: Yunho/Jaejoong
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance, Humor
Summary: Jung Yunho was supposed to be the mysterious, indifferent, student council president. While he’d never stolen any minute of Kim Jaejoong’s attention before, he certainly was now.
“W-what?”
“I got accepted into a university over there, and I have…I have to move.” A sad look crossed Yunho’s face, and he looked down in shame. “I…It was something I applied for before you and I ever became serious. I didn’t think about telling you when we weren’t dating because I didn’t think it was important, and I was so convinced I wouldn’t get in…but then, somehow, when we got together…I got so wrapped up in us that I just kind of forgot about it -“
“How can you leave?” Jaejoong choked out, his heart clenching tightly in his chest as he stared at Yunho. “How…how - why didn’t you tell me?” He shoved Yunho roughly and began to push him, “How could you?”
Yunho grabbed his fists and pulled Jaejoong into a tight embrace. “I’m so sorry.” He whispered, “I didn’t, I didn’t want to tell you like this -“
Jaejoong wrenched himself out of Yunho’s grasp, and he was unable to hold back the tears that had begun to fall from his eyes. He wiped at his eyes in frustration, trying to hold everything back, but he couldn’t. “And how did you want to tell me? When you were already in Japan?” Jaejoong shouted, unable to hold himself back any longer.
His view of Yunho was blurred by his tears, and he wiped at his eyes irritably in order to get the tears from stop falling. He shook his head, trying to push away the thoughts that had come to his head. What did Yunho leaving mean for their relationship? Would Yunho break up with him?
“You said you loved me!”
Yunho took a step forward, “Jaejong, I do.” He reached out to hold Jaejoong’s hand, but the other teenager took a step back and pulled his arm away. The tears were falling freely now, and he shook his head furiously at Yunho.
It hurt his heart to think about the future, and he was just filled with so many emotions that he didn’t know what to think anymore. He’d heard so many bad things about long distance relationships, and he felt so betrayed that Yunho hadn’t told him about it all sooner. He didn’t care if he was being selfish, right now, he was hurting and that was all he could focus on.
“I’m breaking up with you.” Jaejoong whispered impulsively before he turned away and fled from Yunho.
o-o-o
His sisters knocked at his door, but he ignored them. They’d seen him come home, his eyes red and the tears still rolling down his cheeks. For the entire afternoon, they’d tried coaxing him to open the door with promises of brownies, cupcakes, chocolate, clothes and almost everything he liked, but he’d rejected each offer.
All he could think about was himself. He was so scared, and his heart felt like it was splitting into two. Jaejoong clenched his pillow tightly and resisted his urge to just scream until his throat gave out. He’d given up on crying - the tears refused to come anymore, and instead, he settled for curling up into himself. His phone had been busy the entire afternoon, but he watched it indifferently. He didn’t want to talk to anyone, least of all Yunho.
Jaejoong hugged his pillow closer to his body, and he waited silently as he heard the door of his room get unlocked. After a few more minutes, the door opened, and he craned his neck to see who’d come in. Yoori had a box of brownies in her hand, and she said nothing as she came inside and sat down next to Jaejoong on the bed. She reached out to stroke his hair softly, and he sat up reluctantly.
She opened the box of brownies, and he immediately reached out for one. He crammed it into his mouth, savoring the chocolate flavor on his tongue as he chewed. Yoori took one and nibbled at it, watching her brother chew the brownie savagely. As soon as he’d swallowed it down, she handed him a carton of milk.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Yoori asked gently in a tone that she hardly ever used on him. She carded her fingers through his hair, “Come on Jaejoong, I know you. What’s wrong.”
“He’s leaving,” Jaejoong whispered. He swallowed hard, and suddenly the brownie didn’t make him feel any better. He shook his head and stared down at his bed sheets, refusing to meet his sister’s gaze. “He’s leaving me behind and going to Japan.”
“Oh honey, I know it’s not like that.” Yoori murmured as she put the brownie she’d been nibbling back into the box. She pulled Jaejoong closer, wrapping her arms around him tightly. “Don’t cry -“
Jaejoong cried onto her shoulder, “I don’t want him to go. If he goes, I’m going to miss him so much.” He held her tightly, burrowing his face deeper into her shoulder and trying to get more comfort from her as he confessed everything that had happened earlier in the day.
After he’d finished, Yoori kissed his head and ruffled his hair. “Oh baby, you’re growing up. Look at you now.” She smiled against his head and pulled him closer, “To think that you used to tell me that you’d never cry over anyone…”
Jaejoong pulled away from his sister’s shoulder and pouted at her before he gave in and returned back into her arms. “I’m so scared…about the future, about him, about us. It hurts my head and heart to think about everything, and I just want everything to go back to how it was like in the past.”
“You know things can’t stay like that,” Yoori whispered calmly as she kept Jaejoong close to her. “I know it’s hard right now, but…you don’t know what the future’s like, and maybe this change won’t end up being so bad. You’re leaving high school, and things have to change. This isn’t the end Jaejoong, I promise you that. It may feel like it’s the end, like your world is imploding and falling in on itself, but it’s not. You just have to be strong.”
Jaejoong held himself back from crying any further and simply held his sister close to his body. He understood what she was saying, but it was just so hard for him to believe that everything wasn’t falling apart. In the months that he’d been with Yunho, he’d become so attached to the other that he couldn’t even bring himself to think about a life which he would no longer be a part of.
He’d heard that first loves weren’t meant to last, but he refused to believe in that. For all his life, he’d done almost everything his way - and it was only now that Jaejoong realized he’d been so stupid to run away. He was still angry, but he’d been stupid to tell Yuno that he wanted to break up with him.
Yunho had been stupid, but he wasn’t blameless either. He’d made the situation worse, and Jaejoong berated himself mentally.
“You’re a strong person,” Yoori continued as she rubbed Jaejoong’s back in a small, circular motion. “You’ll get over this. Eat a few more brownies, finish your milk, and then you can go talk to Yunho about this whole situation properly.”
Jaejoong nodded, pulled away from his sister and took hold of another brownie. Just as he was about to take a bite, he glanced at her. “Is this low fat?”
Yoori frowned, “Of course not.”
“Good,” Jaejoong replied before he shoved the brownie into his mouth and chewed, letting the chocolate do its work. If there was one lesson that his sisters had successfully passed on to him after their years of experience, it was that chocolate always helped in making everything better.
o-o-o
Jaejoong had left his phone at home, determined to talk to Yunho face to face. Yoori had forced another box of brownies into his hands before he’d left home, insisting that it wouldn’t be polite for him to drop by the Jungs’ household without anything. So, it was because of that that he was now standing outside of the Jungs’ home with a box of fudge brownies in his hands.
He stared at the doorbell, wondering if he should press it. Jaejoong swallowed hard and licked his lips, debating the situation before he gave up and sighed loudly. It’d been a stupid idea to not make sure Yunho was home. He sighed and stared down at the sidewalk, wondering if it could swallow him up and save him from his overwhelming feelings and his own sheer stupidity.
“Can I help you?”
Jaejoong turned around sharply, and his eyes widened when he saw Mr. Jung standing only a few feet away from him. He was holding onto Tapoong’s leash, and the dog was wagging its tail excitedly at the sight of him. It was obvious that they’d been out on a walk, and Jaejoong paled, wishing he’d gone back home before the other had returned from wherever he’d gone.
He swallowed hard, “Is…is Yunho home?”
“He hasn’t come back home after he’d left earlier in the afternoon to meet…” Mr. Jung said slowly as he took in the sight of Jaejoong’s eyes, which were still slightly red. “Is there something that you need?”
Jaejoong swallowed hard.
“Can I wait inside? I have to talk to Yunho…” he licked his lips anxiously, “It’s kind of important, so I hope it’s okay.”
A long silence followed, and Jaejoong shifted uncomfortably. He could feel Mr. Jung scrutinizing him, probably trying to figure out what had exactly gone on between him and Yunho. After another minute had passed, Jaejoong gave up. It was quite obvious that Mr. Jung didn’t want him around -
“Alright then,” Mr. Jung said finally. He walked past Jaejoong and opened the gate for the teenager. As soon as it was open, he pushed it and turned around to look at Jaejoong. “You can come in and wait.”
“Oh - thank you.” Jaejoong stuttered, rushing in so quickly that he nearly tripped and fell onto the ground. A blush crept across his cheeks in embarrassment, and he kept his head low and followed Mr. Jung inside the house, his heart beating in his chest.
He was not looking forward to spending some quality time with Mr. Jung, not after he’d just sort-of broke up with his son. Jaejoong prayed desperately that Yunho hadn’t taken him seriously and stepped inside, his heart pounding harder and louder in his chest with each step.
o-o-o
Jaejoong set the box of brownies onto the table, and he watched as Mr. Jung unhooked Taepoong from his leash. He licked his lips once again, a nervous habit of his, and as soon as Mr. Jung was done tending to Taepoong, he straightened up and turned his attention to Jaejoong.
“Jihye’s out with her mother, they went shopping.” He said, explaining the reason as to why the house was so quiet.
The teenager nodded mutely, and he sat down on a stool by the kitchen counter. He wrung his hands together nervously before he realized that he’d forgotten to say anything about the brownies. He placed his hand onto the box and pushed it forward towards Mr. Jung.
“I brought this over for you guys,” he mumbled, his eyes downcast. He swallowed hard and when he looked up, Mr. Jung was looking at him with an indifferent expression on his face.
Jaejoong recoiled immediately, and he placed his hands back onto the lap. He let out an anxious breath and waited, hoping that Mr. Jung would say something. However, unfortunately for him, it didn’t seem like Mr. Jung was going to be say anything. Jaejoong watched as the older man roamed around the kitchen, preparing his coffee wordlessly and pretending like he didn’t exist.
The whole situation irked him, and Jaejoong bit his lip, trying to accept the silence, but in the end, he couldn’t.
“How do you feel about Yunho going to Japan?” Jaejoong asked. He waited for Mr. Jung to say something, and he watched as the older man sat down his coffee mug and turned around to look at Jaejoong.
“I have no problems with it,” Mr. Jung replied. “It’s something that he’s wanted for a while now, and I’m happy that he can do what he’s dreamed of doing. Seeing as I’m based over there, I can’t say I have any complaints either.”
As soon as he was done talking, he looked at Jaejoong, as if waiting for the teenager to say something in response. When Jaejoong said nothing, he decided to ask a question of his own.
“How do you plan on dealing with the fact that Yunho will be leaving?” Mr. Jung asked, his tone formal and not at all trying to hide the fact that he seemed rather doubtful about Jaejoong. He drummed his fingers on the table, “It’s correct for me to presume that you will be studying here, right?”
Jaejoong felt as if there was a knot in his throat. He swallowed hard, gathered his thoughts, and tried to think of a reply. What was he supposed to say? Just earlier in the day, he’d stupidly told Yunho he wanted to break up with him, and now he was here at Yunho’s house without a definite plan.
What did he want?
Jaejoong stared down at his hands. He thought of all the times he’d spent with Yunho, all the things he’d felt for Yunho, and suddenly, the answer was clear. Yes, it would be difficult to have a long distance relationship, but he’d been stupid in letting his initial reaction could his thoughts. He didn’t want to let go of Yunho, and he’d been foolish to think that just because Yunho was leaving, that had to be the end for them.
He raised his eyes and met Mr. Jung’s gaze, holding it and staring back at him with a look filled with determination and strength.
“Admittedly, I didn’t take the news well…as you can see,” Jaejoong said, well aware that his eyes were still a little red. “But, after thinking about everything…I know this opportunity is going to be good for Yunho. He should be working towards his goals, and while it’s going to be hard, I want our relationship to work.”
Jaejoong swallowed hard, feeling emotional once again, but he kept his eyes glued onto Mr. Jung’s. He needed the other man to know that he was serious because although he’d try to play off the man’s initial coldness, it was something that bothered him greatly. He loved Yunho, and the other man needed to know that.
“I love your son very much,” Jaejoong whispered, and he wiped his eyes irritably. “I want him to succeed as much as possible, and…and…even if it means leaving me...I want him to go since it’s what’s best for him. Maybe we’ll break up later on, I don’t know, but what I do know is that I’m going to do as much as possible to make sure our relationship survives despite the odds.”
He finished his answer with a slight dip of his head and wiped at his eyes. Saying everything he felt made the whole situation even more real, and Jaejoong didn’t know what to say anymore because he felt like crying all over again. He wiped his eyes and looked up at Mr. Jung.
“May I be excused? I…I’ll just go to the bathroom,” Jaejoong mumbled, nearly tripping off the stool in his haste. He glanced back at Mr. Jung, and the other man’s look had softened noticeably.
“Jaejoong…”
The teenager looked at the older man, and he waited for him to continue.
“For what it’s worth, I do think you make my son very happy.” Mr. Jung said slowly, and the way he talked reminded Jaejoong of Yunho. “I’ve never seen him so happy with someone else, and you’ve changed him a lot…for the better. I’m sure he’ll work just as hard to make sure your relationship works out.”
Jaejoong nodded, and he wiped at his tears again, but just as he was about to say something, Mr. Jung continued speaking.
“You’re a good kid.” Mr. Jung said, “I know it may not seem like I approved of you, but I’m happy that Yunho has someone like you in his life.”
“Thank - “
The sound of the front door opening made Jaejoong stop speaking, and he could hear voices coming from outside of the kitchen. Taepoong trotted out of the kitchen to greet whoever was at the door, and soon enough, he heard someone approaching. He glanced at the kitchen doorway, and Jihye walked in, only for her to stop when she saw Jaejoong. Her eyes widened as soon as she saw him. “Oh my God! Dad! Why is Jaejoong crying? What did you do? Yunho! Jaejoong’s crying!”
As soon as she’d mentioned in his name, he’d heard the sounds of rushed footsteps, and in a matter of seconds, Yunho was at the doorway, shopping bags in hand.
“Hi,” Jaejoong whispered.
Yunho ran and crushed Jaejoong tightly in his arms. He buried his face into Jaejoong’s neck and held him tightly, ignoring Jihye’s loud voice as she asked her dad about what had happened. Jaejoong ignored the other people in the room as well and wrapped his arms tightly around Yunho.
“I’m sorry.” Yunho muttered, “I should’ve told you sooner. This is -“
“I’m sorry,” Jaejoong interrupted, fresh tears spilling out of his eyes as he buried his face into Yunho’s chest. “I don’t want to break up with you. I was being stupid, I was emotional, and I’m so sorry -”
Yunho held him even tighter, “It’s okay. I…I didn’t really believe you anyway.”
Jaejoong hit Yunho’s chest, “Idiot.”
“But you love me, right?” Yunho whispered as he brought Jaejoong closer.
“Of course,” Jaejoong mumbled, and he cried all over again.
o-o-o
They were currently now in Yunho’s car, because after all the brownies had been finished and all the important words and apologies had been shared, Mrs. Jung had insisted that Jaejoong be brought back home. Jaejoong was still a little hung over from all the emotions and crying, so he was merely content to sit down and look out the window while Yunho drove.
Only the faint sounds of music played in the background, and Jaejoong was relieved. He didn’t really want Yunho to apologize to him anymore. After all, there wasn’t really that much to apologize for, and nor did he want the other to feel guilty. Perhaps the news hadn’t been delivered properly, but Jaejoong could still recognize the fact that Yunho leaving for Japan would be a huge deal for him.
There was just not much to say about anything. It was a sort of bittersweet success, but Jaejoong could live with what was coming. The support and acceptance that the Jungs and his sisters had showered upon him was enough for him to realize that he and Yunho weren’t the only ones that wanted their relationship to work out. It would be difficult, but overall, he was feeling confident that things would go okay.
After all, he was Kim Jaejoong, and Kim Jaejoong would make sure things would go his way, no matter what.
“I kind of suck…don’t I?”
The sudden admission surprised him, and Jaejoong glanced at Yunho to make sure he’d really heard correctly. When the latter made no move to correct himself, Jaejoong replied. “Yes, you do suck. Why? What made you finally realize that?”
“I visited Ara today,” Yunho said as he continued to keep his eyes out on the road. “I thought it’d be smart to give you some time to gather your thoughts and whatever…so I went over to her house and talked to her…about us.”
“And what did she say?”
Yunho licked his lips, “She cried…and hit me, a couple of times.” He glanced at Jaejoong, “She got mad at me for not telling her I was interested in girls, for making her look like a fool, and some other things…but I guess we’re okay now…probably awkward, but okay.”
“She hit you?”
“Yeah, why?”
“You deserve it,” Jaejoong said half-heartedly as he looked out the window to see that they were already on his street. “You’re such an idiot sometimes. I don’t even know why I love you. The amount of stupidity you possess is simply overwhelming.”
Yunho stopped the car in front of Jaejoong’s house, and before he could say anything, Jaejoong looked at him and spoke first.
“No matter what, I love you. You’re my idiot.” Jaejoong said, trying to hold himself back from crying, because he was already so sick of crying. He smiled at Yunho, “I love you, and I want what’s best for you, even if it means going away.”
He let out a shuddery breath and smiled, “All I need is one thing from you.”
“And what’s that?” Yunho asked, his voice soft.
“Tell me we’ll be okay.” Jaejoong replied. He didn’t really need a confession of love from Yunho, after all, he’d already gotten that a thousand of times and more.
What he needed was reassurance from Yunho that they’d be fine, that they’d be strong enough to deal with everything, because if there was one thing that Jaejoong needed, it was Yunho’s strength. He’d always been sort of a flighty person, and after months with Yunho, Jaejoong recognized Yunho’s sturdy and strong character. He was the one that comforted Jaejoong when he failed quizzes, the one that took care of Jaejoong when he was sick, the one who kept him rooted to the ground and the one who was an unending source of strength.
He believed in Yunho - in his words and in his character. If Yunho told him that things would be okay, then he would believe him. They’d fight their future trials together, and at the end of it all, they’d be fine. Jaejoong waited, and Yunho unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned forward.
His lips were only centimeters away from Jaejoong, and he gently carded his hand through the other’s hair as he pulled his face closer. Yunho’s eyes met Jaejoong’s, and he gazed at him with an expression of love and determination.
“Jaejoong,” he began, his voice firm. “We’re going to be okay.”
Jaejoong smiled and leaned forward, closing the distance between their lips, and shut his eyes as Yunho pulled him closer and deepened the kiss.
They were going to be okay.
< >
Author’s Note: WHOOOOOO. I FINALLY UPDATED THIS. HUZZAH. I PROMISE THE NEXT UPDATE FOR THIS WILL COME MUCH SOONER, SINCE I’VE ALREADY STARTED WRITING THE NEXT CHAPTER! :D I hope you guys all liked and enjoyed this…only a few more chapters until this story ends. Ugh, I just ended Someday, and this will soon be ending as well. *wipes tears* I’ll be ending this story with twenty chapters, so let’s all enjoy the ride, shall we? ^^ Thank you for reading & commenting! ♥
Beta: atriums
Pairing: Yunho/Jaejoong
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance, Humor
Summary: Jung Yunho was supposed to be the mysterious, indifferent, student council president. While he’d never stolen any minute of Kim Jaejoong’s attention before, he certainly was now.
“W-what?”
“I got accepted into a university over there, and I have…I have to move.” A sad look crossed Yunho’s face, and he looked down in shame. “I…It was something I applied for before you and I ever became serious. I didn’t think about telling you when we weren’t dating because I didn’t think it was important, and I was so convinced I wouldn’t get in…but then, somehow, when we got together…I got so wrapped up in us that I just kind of forgot about it -“
“How can you leave?” Jaejoong choked out, his heart clenching tightly in his chest as he stared at Yunho. “How…how - why didn’t you tell me?” He shoved Yunho roughly and began to push him, “How could you?”
Yunho grabbed his fists and pulled Jaejoong into a tight embrace. “I’m so sorry.” He whispered, “I didn’t, I didn’t want to tell you like this -“
Jaejoong wrenched himself out of Yunho’s grasp, and he was unable to hold back the tears that had begun to fall from his eyes. He wiped at his eyes in frustration, trying to hold everything back, but he couldn’t. “And how did you want to tell me? When you were already in Japan?” Jaejoong shouted, unable to hold himself back any longer.
His view of Yunho was blurred by his tears, and he wiped at his eyes irritably in order to get the tears from stop falling. He shook his head, trying to push away the thoughts that had come to his head. What did Yunho leaving mean for their relationship? Would Yunho break up with him?
“You said you loved me!”
Yunho took a step forward, “Jaejong, I do.” He reached out to hold Jaejoong’s hand, but the other teenager took a step back and pulled his arm away. The tears were falling freely now, and he shook his head furiously at Yunho.
It hurt his heart to think about the future, and he was just filled with so many emotions that he didn’t know what to think anymore. He’d heard so many bad things about long distance relationships, and he felt so betrayed that Yunho hadn’t told him about it all sooner. He didn’t care if he was being selfish, right now, he was hurting and that was all he could focus on.
“I’m breaking up with you.” Jaejoong whispered impulsively before he turned away and fled from Yunho.
o-o-o
His sisters knocked at his door, but he ignored them. They’d seen him come home, his eyes red and the tears still rolling down his cheeks. For the entire afternoon, they’d tried coaxing him to open the door with promises of brownies, cupcakes, chocolate, clothes and almost everything he liked, but he’d rejected each offer.
All he could think about was himself. He was so scared, and his heart felt like it was splitting into two. Jaejoong clenched his pillow tightly and resisted his urge to just scream until his throat gave out. He’d given up on crying - the tears refused to come anymore, and instead, he settled for curling up into himself. His phone had been busy the entire afternoon, but he watched it indifferently. He didn’t want to talk to anyone, least of all Yunho.
Jaejoong hugged his pillow closer to his body, and he waited silently as he heard the door of his room get unlocked. After a few more minutes, the door opened, and he craned his neck to see who’d come in. Yoori had a box of brownies in her hand, and she said nothing as she came inside and sat down next to Jaejoong on the bed. She reached out to stroke his hair softly, and he sat up reluctantly.
She opened the box of brownies, and he immediately reached out for one. He crammed it into his mouth, savoring the chocolate flavor on his tongue as he chewed. Yoori took one and nibbled at it, watching her brother chew the brownie savagely. As soon as he’d swallowed it down, she handed him a carton of milk.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Yoori asked gently in a tone that she hardly ever used on him. She carded her fingers through his hair, “Come on Jaejoong, I know you. What’s wrong.”
“He’s leaving,” Jaejoong whispered. He swallowed hard, and suddenly the brownie didn’t make him feel any better. He shook his head and stared down at his bed sheets, refusing to meet his sister’s gaze. “He’s leaving me behind and going to Japan.”
“Oh honey, I know it’s not like that.” Yoori murmured as she put the brownie she’d been nibbling back into the box. She pulled Jaejoong closer, wrapping her arms around him tightly. “Don’t cry -“
Jaejoong cried onto her shoulder, “I don’t want him to go. If he goes, I’m going to miss him so much.” He held her tightly, burrowing his face deeper into her shoulder and trying to get more comfort from her as he confessed everything that had happened earlier in the day.
After he’d finished, Yoori kissed his head and ruffled his hair. “Oh baby, you’re growing up. Look at you now.” She smiled against his head and pulled him closer, “To think that you used to tell me that you’d never cry over anyone…”
Jaejoong pulled away from his sister’s shoulder and pouted at her before he gave in and returned back into her arms. “I’m so scared…about the future, about him, about us. It hurts my head and heart to think about everything, and I just want everything to go back to how it was like in the past.”
“You know things can’t stay like that,” Yoori whispered calmly as she kept Jaejoong close to her. “I know it’s hard right now, but…you don’t know what the future’s like, and maybe this change won’t end up being so bad. You’re leaving high school, and things have to change. This isn’t the end Jaejoong, I promise you that. It may feel like it’s the end, like your world is imploding and falling in on itself, but it’s not. You just have to be strong.”
Jaejoong held himself back from crying any further and simply held his sister close to his body. He understood what she was saying, but it was just so hard for him to believe that everything wasn’t falling apart. In the months that he’d been with Yunho, he’d become so attached to the other that he couldn’t even bring himself to think about a life which he would no longer be a part of.
He’d heard that first loves weren’t meant to last, but he refused to believe in that. For all his life, he’d done almost everything his way - and it was only now that Jaejoong realized he’d been so stupid to run away. He was still angry, but he’d been stupid to tell Yuno that he wanted to break up with him.
Yunho had been stupid, but he wasn’t blameless either. He’d made the situation worse, and Jaejoong berated himself mentally.
“You’re a strong person,” Yoori continued as she rubbed Jaejoong’s back in a small, circular motion. “You’ll get over this. Eat a few more brownies, finish your milk, and then you can go talk to Yunho about this whole situation properly.”
Jaejoong nodded, pulled away from his sister and took hold of another brownie. Just as he was about to take a bite, he glanced at her. “Is this low fat?”
Yoori frowned, “Of course not.”
“Good,” Jaejoong replied before he shoved the brownie into his mouth and chewed, letting the chocolate do its work. If there was one lesson that his sisters had successfully passed on to him after their years of experience, it was that chocolate always helped in making everything better.
o-o-o
Jaejoong had left his phone at home, determined to talk to Yunho face to face. Yoori had forced another box of brownies into his hands before he’d left home, insisting that it wouldn’t be polite for him to drop by the Jungs’ household without anything. So, it was because of that that he was now standing outside of the Jungs’ home with a box of fudge brownies in his hands.
He stared at the doorbell, wondering if he should press it. Jaejoong swallowed hard and licked his lips, debating the situation before he gave up and sighed loudly. It’d been a stupid idea to not make sure Yunho was home. He sighed and stared down at the sidewalk, wondering if it could swallow him up and save him from his overwhelming feelings and his own sheer stupidity.
“Can I help you?”
Jaejoong turned around sharply, and his eyes widened when he saw Mr. Jung standing only a few feet away from him. He was holding onto Tapoong’s leash, and the dog was wagging its tail excitedly at the sight of him. It was obvious that they’d been out on a walk, and Jaejoong paled, wishing he’d gone back home before the other had returned from wherever he’d gone.
He swallowed hard, “Is…is Yunho home?”
“He hasn’t come back home after he’d left earlier in the afternoon to meet…” Mr. Jung said slowly as he took in the sight of Jaejoong’s eyes, which were still slightly red. “Is there something that you need?”
Jaejoong swallowed hard.
“Can I wait inside? I have to talk to Yunho…” he licked his lips anxiously, “It’s kind of important, so I hope it’s okay.”
A long silence followed, and Jaejoong shifted uncomfortably. He could feel Mr. Jung scrutinizing him, probably trying to figure out what had exactly gone on between him and Yunho. After another minute had passed, Jaejoong gave up. It was quite obvious that Mr. Jung didn’t want him around -
“Alright then,” Mr. Jung said finally. He walked past Jaejoong and opened the gate for the teenager. As soon as it was open, he pushed it and turned around to look at Jaejoong. “You can come in and wait.”
“Oh - thank you.” Jaejoong stuttered, rushing in so quickly that he nearly tripped and fell onto the ground. A blush crept across his cheeks in embarrassment, and he kept his head low and followed Mr. Jung inside the house, his heart beating in his chest.
He was not looking forward to spending some quality time with Mr. Jung, not after he’d just sort-of broke up with his son. Jaejoong prayed desperately that Yunho hadn’t taken him seriously and stepped inside, his heart pounding harder and louder in his chest with each step.
o-o-o
Jaejoong set the box of brownies onto the table, and he watched as Mr. Jung unhooked Taepoong from his leash. He licked his lips once again, a nervous habit of his, and as soon as Mr. Jung was done tending to Taepoong, he straightened up and turned his attention to Jaejoong.
“Jihye’s out with her mother, they went shopping.” He said, explaining the reason as to why the house was so quiet.
The teenager nodded mutely, and he sat down on a stool by the kitchen counter. He wrung his hands together nervously before he realized that he’d forgotten to say anything about the brownies. He placed his hand onto the box and pushed it forward towards Mr. Jung.
“I brought this over for you guys,” he mumbled, his eyes downcast. He swallowed hard and when he looked up, Mr. Jung was looking at him with an indifferent expression on his face.
Jaejoong recoiled immediately, and he placed his hands back onto the lap. He let out an anxious breath and waited, hoping that Mr. Jung would say something. However, unfortunately for him, it didn’t seem like Mr. Jung was going to be say anything. Jaejoong watched as the older man roamed around the kitchen, preparing his coffee wordlessly and pretending like he didn’t exist.
The whole situation irked him, and Jaejoong bit his lip, trying to accept the silence, but in the end, he couldn’t.
“How do you feel about Yunho going to Japan?” Jaejoong asked. He waited for Mr. Jung to say something, and he watched as the older man sat down his coffee mug and turned around to look at Jaejoong.
“I have no problems with it,” Mr. Jung replied. “It’s something that he’s wanted for a while now, and I’m happy that he can do what he’s dreamed of doing. Seeing as I’m based over there, I can’t say I have any complaints either.”
As soon as he was done talking, he looked at Jaejoong, as if waiting for the teenager to say something in response. When Jaejoong said nothing, he decided to ask a question of his own.
“How do you plan on dealing with the fact that Yunho will be leaving?” Mr. Jung asked, his tone formal and not at all trying to hide the fact that he seemed rather doubtful about Jaejoong. He drummed his fingers on the table, “It’s correct for me to presume that you will be studying here, right?”
Jaejoong felt as if there was a knot in his throat. He swallowed hard, gathered his thoughts, and tried to think of a reply. What was he supposed to say? Just earlier in the day, he’d stupidly told Yunho he wanted to break up with him, and now he was here at Yunho’s house without a definite plan.
What did he want?
Jaejoong stared down at his hands. He thought of all the times he’d spent with Yunho, all the things he’d felt for Yunho, and suddenly, the answer was clear. Yes, it would be difficult to have a long distance relationship, but he’d been stupid in letting his initial reaction could his thoughts. He didn’t want to let go of Yunho, and he’d been foolish to think that just because Yunho was leaving, that had to be the end for them.
He raised his eyes and met Mr. Jung’s gaze, holding it and staring back at him with a look filled with determination and strength.
“Admittedly, I didn’t take the news well…as you can see,” Jaejoong said, well aware that his eyes were still a little red. “But, after thinking about everything…I know this opportunity is going to be good for Yunho. He should be working towards his goals, and while it’s going to be hard, I want our relationship to work.”
Jaejoong swallowed hard, feeling emotional once again, but he kept his eyes glued onto Mr. Jung’s. He needed the other man to know that he was serious because although he’d try to play off the man’s initial coldness, it was something that bothered him greatly. He loved Yunho, and the other man needed to know that.
“I love your son very much,” Jaejoong whispered, and he wiped his eyes irritably. “I want him to succeed as much as possible, and…and…even if it means leaving me...I want him to go since it’s what’s best for him. Maybe we’ll break up later on, I don’t know, but what I do know is that I’m going to do as much as possible to make sure our relationship survives despite the odds.”
He finished his answer with a slight dip of his head and wiped at his eyes. Saying everything he felt made the whole situation even more real, and Jaejoong didn’t know what to say anymore because he felt like crying all over again. He wiped his eyes and looked up at Mr. Jung.
“May I be excused? I…I’ll just go to the bathroom,” Jaejoong mumbled, nearly tripping off the stool in his haste. He glanced back at Mr. Jung, and the other man’s look had softened noticeably.
“Jaejoong…”
The teenager looked at the older man, and he waited for him to continue.
“For what it’s worth, I do think you make my son very happy.” Mr. Jung said slowly, and the way he talked reminded Jaejoong of Yunho. “I’ve never seen him so happy with someone else, and you’ve changed him a lot…for the better. I’m sure he’ll work just as hard to make sure your relationship works out.”
Jaejoong nodded, and he wiped at his tears again, but just as he was about to say something, Mr. Jung continued speaking.
“You’re a good kid.” Mr. Jung said, “I know it may not seem like I approved of you, but I’m happy that Yunho has someone like you in his life.”
“Thank - “
The sound of the front door opening made Jaejoong stop speaking, and he could hear voices coming from outside of the kitchen. Taepoong trotted out of the kitchen to greet whoever was at the door, and soon enough, he heard someone approaching. He glanced at the kitchen doorway, and Jihye walked in, only for her to stop when she saw Jaejoong. Her eyes widened as soon as she saw him. “Oh my God! Dad! Why is Jaejoong crying? What did you do? Yunho! Jaejoong’s crying!”
As soon as she’d mentioned in his name, he’d heard the sounds of rushed footsteps, and in a matter of seconds, Yunho was at the doorway, shopping bags in hand.
“Hi,” Jaejoong whispered.
Yunho ran and crushed Jaejoong tightly in his arms. He buried his face into Jaejoong’s neck and held him tightly, ignoring Jihye’s loud voice as she asked her dad about what had happened. Jaejoong ignored the other people in the room as well and wrapped his arms tightly around Yunho.
“I’m sorry.” Yunho muttered, “I should’ve told you sooner. This is -“
“I’m sorry,” Jaejoong interrupted, fresh tears spilling out of his eyes as he buried his face into Yunho’s chest. “I don’t want to break up with you. I was being stupid, I was emotional, and I’m so sorry -”
Yunho held him even tighter, “It’s okay. I…I didn’t really believe you anyway.”
Jaejoong hit Yunho’s chest, “Idiot.”
“But you love me, right?” Yunho whispered as he brought Jaejoong closer.
“Of course,” Jaejoong mumbled, and he cried all over again.
o-o-o
They were currently now in Yunho’s car, because after all the brownies had been finished and all the important words and apologies had been shared, Mrs. Jung had insisted that Jaejoong be brought back home. Jaejoong was still a little hung over from all the emotions and crying, so he was merely content to sit down and look out the window while Yunho drove.
Only the faint sounds of music played in the background, and Jaejoong was relieved. He didn’t really want Yunho to apologize to him anymore. After all, there wasn’t really that much to apologize for, and nor did he want the other to feel guilty. Perhaps the news hadn’t been delivered properly, but Jaejoong could still recognize the fact that Yunho leaving for Japan would be a huge deal for him.
There was just not much to say about anything. It was a sort of bittersweet success, but Jaejoong could live with what was coming. The support and acceptance that the Jungs and his sisters had showered upon him was enough for him to realize that he and Yunho weren’t the only ones that wanted their relationship to work out. It would be difficult, but overall, he was feeling confident that things would go okay.
After all, he was Kim Jaejoong, and Kim Jaejoong would make sure things would go his way, no matter what.
“I kind of suck…don’t I?”
The sudden admission surprised him, and Jaejoong glanced at Yunho to make sure he’d really heard correctly. When the latter made no move to correct himself, Jaejoong replied. “Yes, you do suck. Why? What made you finally realize that?”
“I visited Ara today,” Yunho said as he continued to keep his eyes out on the road. “I thought it’d be smart to give you some time to gather your thoughts and whatever…so I went over to her house and talked to her…about us.”
“And what did she say?”
Yunho licked his lips, “She cried…and hit me, a couple of times.” He glanced at Jaejoong, “She got mad at me for not telling her I was interested in girls, for making her look like a fool, and some other things…but I guess we’re okay now…probably awkward, but okay.”
“She hit you?”
“Yeah, why?”
“You deserve it,” Jaejoong said half-heartedly as he looked out the window to see that they were already on his street. “You’re such an idiot sometimes. I don’t even know why I love you. The amount of stupidity you possess is simply overwhelming.”
Yunho stopped the car in front of Jaejoong’s house, and before he could say anything, Jaejoong looked at him and spoke first.
“No matter what, I love you. You’re my idiot.” Jaejoong said, trying to hold himself back from crying, because he was already so sick of crying. He smiled at Yunho, “I love you, and I want what’s best for you, even if it means going away.”
He let out a shuddery breath and smiled, “All I need is one thing from you.”
“And what’s that?” Yunho asked, his voice soft.
“Tell me we’ll be okay.” Jaejoong replied. He didn’t really need a confession of love from Yunho, after all, he’d already gotten that a thousand of times and more.
What he needed was reassurance from Yunho that they’d be fine, that they’d be strong enough to deal with everything, because if there was one thing that Jaejoong needed, it was Yunho’s strength. He’d always been sort of a flighty person, and after months with Yunho, Jaejoong recognized Yunho’s sturdy and strong character. He was the one that comforted Jaejoong when he failed quizzes, the one that took care of Jaejoong when he was sick, the one who kept him rooted to the ground and the one who was an unending source of strength.
He believed in Yunho - in his words and in his character. If Yunho told him that things would be okay, then he would believe him. They’d fight their future trials together, and at the end of it all, they’d be fine. Jaejoong waited, and Yunho unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned forward.
His lips were only centimeters away from Jaejoong, and he gently carded his hand through the other’s hair as he pulled his face closer. Yunho’s eyes met Jaejoong’s, and he gazed at him with an expression of love and determination.
“Jaejoong,” he began, his voice firm. “We’re going to be okay.”
Jaejoong smiled and leaned forward, closing the distance between their lips, and shut his eyes as Yunho pulled him closer and deepened the kiss.
They were going to be okay.
< >
Author’s Note: WHOOOOOO. I FINALLY UPDATED THIS. HUZZAH. I PROMISE THE NEXT UPDATE FOR THIS WILL COME MUCH SOONER, SINCE I’VE ALREADY STARTED WRITING THE NEXT CHAPTER! :D I hope you guys all liked and enjoyed this…only a few more chapters until this story ends. Ugh, I just ended Someday, and this will soon be ending as well. *wipes tears* I’ll be ending this story with twenty chapters, so let’s all enjoy the ride, shall we? ^^ Thank you for reading & commenting! ♥