Miss Manners, You Have Failed Me

[lilmissnever]

There are some things in this world for which you will never be prepared. I don't know what to do if pigs fall from the sky. I have no idea how to react if I am kidnapped by aliens who demand that I defend the state of humankind lest they will blast us all into messy oblivion. If I am accosted by rabid spider monkeys who want me to edit their rough

Comments

[headhouse]

Ack. Ack ack ack. This is going fairly high up on my list of reasons to stay a hermit. Sympathies...

[phreddiva]

A homeless woman threw a cup of white fluid on me once, on my way to a first date.

...

/shudder

[tyrsalvia]

Wow. My life has been kind of unhappy lately, but goddamn. I am shuddering and gagging in sympathy.

[lilmissnever]

Help me, Emmie, you're my only hope. Come armed with bleach. Lots of bleach.

[lilmissnever]

Oh no no, the squid is clean. I have washed it many, many times over. I just need my roots done. I don't even really need bleach, since blonde roots and black squid are not my look.

[violentbloom]

kindergarden, first week of school a girl named nicole puked on my head. And the worst part is while the teacher did scrub me off after, I didn't get sent home to immediately shower.

[lilmissnever]

I fully expect Miss Jen to chime in with tales of Vomit Boy. Small children are apparently fountains of vomit.

[violentbloom]

apparently. thankfully I manage to avoid contact with them for the most part.

Oh. My. God.

[msjen]

I am sorry to tell you that being vomited on by a child PALES IN COMPARISON to being vomited on by an adult in the BART station. I am so, so sorry. That is truly horrible.

Although, in fourth grade, a girl behind me in the lunch line did throw up on my head, so I know how you feel. But again, adult vomit is way worse.