Everyone listen to Bandwidth today at 5:00 to hear the hottest new band Agile Like This talk and play. My sister and two friends rock the mic in the witchiest ways.

Fillet of a funny snake,
On the roadway bust and break,
Blast of past and no-hope clog,
Speed of cat and tongue of smog,
Ladies' choice and blind-man's bling,
Smoker's risk, a freaky thing,
Like a Greyhound on the double,
Shave the highway like your stubble.

Guess what section of Macbeth I'm reading right now ( Read more... )

I'm hungry. I wish the pidgeon outside my window would go get me a chicken club. Or that a chicken would go get me a pidgeon pie. My brain is so dried up! And last night I dreamed about hotdogs. What's happening? I feel as old as my (literally) old friend Willie, who turned 88 on Friday, and whose birthday party I couldn't go to because I'm scared ( Read more... )

Amazing. Talk about found poetry. I found this in a junk email under the heading "Close out the year in beauty." I think this summarizes the zeitgeist. There are some sweet lines in here: "real time check out dark," "bad mother at, so shut," "luv her awesome love ( Read more... )

A Story ( Read more... )

P.S.

I called the City of Kingston early this morning and had a heart-to-heart with a gal there about when my garbage day is. A minor accomplishment that's going to make a major difference.

I've made some important realizations during this last period. One, never look on the internet for self-help tips unless you want to drive away even your most indulgent friends. Just kidding. But I did realize some other things. One is that I want to spend a lot of time outside this winter. I want to get a pair of skates. For some reason I really ( Read more... )

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SjB_MUWF88&eurl=

This is true rhetorical genius.

Just yesterday I was so confident that I was listed in the Guiness Book under "biggest wang." But in the words of NIN, now I'm nothing. A dream I had two nights ago about an authority figure destroying my confidence just came true. Gosh, I hope I don't turn out to be psychic. Is that the word for guys and girls who can predict the future ( Read more... )