Log: ‘You're watching the wrong man’
Who: Andrew, Billy and briefly Pietro
When: Day after the date from Hell
Where: Andrew’s apartment
What: Making up. R
Andrew stepped around his apartment nervously as he checked on his cooking meal, trying to focus on that and not on weather or not Pietro had convinced Billy to come back or not.
A few minutes later the doorbell rang ominously
Andrew took a calming breath, preparing for the worst, before walking over, opening the door nervously.
Pietro smiled at him before he shoved Billy in, The doc frowned stumbling before straightening and standing there his hands shoved into his pockets.
"Oh" Andrew blinked in surprise. "You....you came"
He frowned and nodded glancing at the caret. He said you wanted to talk."
"I do, I....thank you for coming," he glanced over at Pietro, mouthing a silent thanks
Pietro grinned, "Good luck," he mouthed with a wink before looking at Billy, "I'm going to head off, have fun you two." he gushed before zipping out of the room, the door closing behind him. Billy looked around the apartment, their last conversation hadn't gone over so well here.
Andrew blinked as Pietro vanished, before sighing, looking down. "...Doc..I..." he sighed, closing his eyes. "I really am sorry"
The blond looked at him before frowning and avoiding his gaze. "So you say."
Andrew raised his head ot look at him. "I do. I never wanted to hurt you. I'm sorry I lied, but I didn't lie about my feelings, not once."
He frowned softly, "Why did you spy on me?"
"To see if you were a danger..I...I worked with someone like you before. They murdered two people. I needed to make sure you weren't like that, and you're not."
"So sure I won't kill people?"
"Certain" said Andrew.
He frowned softly looking down, "Well you're wrong."
Andrew blinked, surprised. "...What do you mean?"
He looked at him, I've killed people Andrew, someone I loved. You have to make a decision first I think.
"Oh...." Andrew frowned, then looked at him. "A decision?"
Whether this apology is worth it."
Andrew looked up at him. "I still think it is"
He sighed looking away and shifting on his feet.
Andrew watched him. "I know the sort of man you are."
"Hmm yes well...I think I may know more." he replied looking over at the photo again with a frown. "If I was a threat what would you have done?"
Andrew sighed. "I would have informed my boss and we'd have kept an eye on you. Moved to stop you if you'd tried anything"
"Killing me?"
"No," said Andrew. "Just...keeping you out of the way."
"Imprisonment?"
"Until you could be stopped being made a threat," said Andrew, sighing. "We have a witch."
He raised a brow, "You'd mentally castrate me?"
"Just remove certain memories," murmured Andrew
He frowned lifting his head finally watching him. "remove my memories?"
Andrew nodded. "It's a last resort, but yeah."
He frowned looking away, "What gives you that right?"
"It's what we do," Andrew shrugged. "To keep people safe"
He frowned putting the photo face down, "Yes well"
"You wanted me to be honest," said Andrew, shrugging quietly.
He nodded, "Yes...seeing your future like that is a little shocking."
"I'm sorry," said Andrew quietly.
He frowned, "So essentially if you had come to me a few months ago I'd be gibbering into my soup?"
"No, she doesn't make it that bad, you'd still function, just not remember the things that drove you to do bad," Andrew frowned. "I don't believe you're a killer"
"Well I am one." H replied walking to the window.
Andrew watched him. "...Tell me"
"Tell you, are you planning to tell back to them?"
Andrew shook his head. "No, I don't want to"
"I didn't ask if you wanted to, I asked if you would."
"I won't," said Andrew softly. "I'm not working now"
"When do you start working?"
"Never with you again, I quit your case" said Andrew
"My case? There's a file somewhere with my name on it?"
"I mean case in a general term, no files," said Andrew
"Oh, why did you quit?"
"Because I didn't want to anymore," murmured Andrew quietly. "....I was personally involved"
Right," He relied shaking his head as he looked around before noticing the smells coming from the kitchen
"Oh...I'm cooking dinner, if you want any?" asked Andrew
He frowned softly, "I should probably go," he murmured with a frown looking at the door uncertainly.
"No, please stay" whispered Andrew
He frowned softly looking at him, "Why?"
"I want you to," said Andrew softly.
He frowned stilling, "He said I owed you that much." he murmured
Andrew glanced down. "I......only stay if you want to," he said quietly
He frowned before sighing and sitting down at the table.
Andrew blinked, before smiling softly, moving to dish him out a plate. "Thank you"
He nodded looking around with a sigh. "That's a lot of food for one person considering you're leaving."
"I'm an optimist," Andrew shrugged softly.
"Were you cooking for me?"
Andrew ducked his head. "....Yeah"
"Oh..." He replied "Thanks." he mumbled.
"Thank you for staying," smiled Andrew, placing the plate in front of him.
He nodded, “You wanted to talk." he murmured taking a bite.
Andrew smiled, getting a plate for himself and sitting beside him. "....I wanted to apologise...I really am sorry. I never wanted to hurt you"
"You spoke to me...you didn't have to."
Andrew sighed. "....I really like you, I couldn't....I wanted to get to know you"
"I truste..." He frowned biting his lip and remaining silent
Andrew looked down. "....I really am sorry," he whispered. "I haven't told them anything, other than you're not a threat. They'll leave you alone"
He frowned poking at his food, "Did you ever think the world needed a change?"
"Yeah, I did," said Andrew. "But there's ways of going about it"
"You think they haven't been tried?"
"I know," Andrew sighed and shrugged. "I just....the non violent was is better"
"You consider war and famine unviolent?"
"No, no I don't" Andrew sighed
"Well we're doing a bang up job so far." he replied eating with a sigh, he missed Andrew's food
Andrew sighed, poking about at his food on the plate. "...Yeah, well....Pietro said I had to try again," he said quietly. "...I was heading back to Italy, so you wouldn't have to deal with me in your life"
"Why did you agree that you had to try again?"
Andrew closed his eyes sadly. "A little part of me wanted to hope that you still cared"
"Do I matter that much?"
"You matter very much," said Andrew quietly, looking up at him.
He frowned softly watching him, "What was it about me that changed you?
"I just got to know you," said Andrew softly. "....And started to fall for what I saw"
He frowned softly chewing on his thumb gently. "You're watching the wrong man."
"You say that," Andrew shrugged. "I tend to disagree"
He sighed softly rubbing his temple, "You hurt me Andrew."
"I know," said Andrew quietly. "....And I know I don't deserve you"
He frowned, “Just...give me some way to trust you."
"How?" asked Andrew softly. "I'll do anything"
He sighed, "I don't know," he murmured pushing his plate away "You told me because you wanted to know me...I could've killed you."
Andrew shrugged softly. "That seems to be a constant in the men I get attracted to"
"It'll be your death." he replied humourlessly
"Probably," said Andrew. "Had a few close shaves already, bound to get me eventually"
"And you're happy with that?"
Andrew shrugged. "I'm happy with you"
He looked at him contemplatively before sighing, "I must be a fool."
Andrew frowned softly, watching him in confusion.
He looked at him, the excitement of kissing him, the electricity from his fingers as they brushed his own. The warmth that filled him with each meal and the terrifying fear when he first discovered he felt something after being dead for so long. These rushed through his mind colouring the hurt and betrayal, the pain at having it all ripped away.
Andrew shifted under his gaze, a little worried. "Doctor?"
"You're so confusing."
"I've been told that," said Andrew, ducking his head
"Before you I was...I died when Penny did. I couldn't feel a thing. Before you I was existing...surviving."
Andrew winced. "Please don't say I made that worse"
"I woke up one day..and I was watching the minutes...the seconds until you would come through the door and sort through my mail."
"You.....you were? he asked softly, watching him wide eyed, still a little unsure.
He nodded, "I caught myself doing it once...I was terrified."
"I'm.....sorry?" he tried
"I didn't know what to do..." he continued so I ignored it...but I found I was looking forward to it to you coming around...I was living again.
"Oh," Andrew blushed a little. "You...really?"
He nodded softly the frown still on his face. "Yes...that's why you're so confusing Andrew...you stir all this up in me, I want to hurt you but I can't bear to see you cry."
"Oh," Andrew frowned a little. "I....what do you want me to do?"
"I don't know..." he whispered his voice cracking a little
Andrew tentatively put his hand over Billy's. "I....I can leave...if... if that makes it easier."
He closed his eyes his hand clasping his tightly "Don’t leave."
Andrew blinked, his fingers curling around Billy's. "Alright," he whispered softly. "I won't"
He dropped his head, "I'm pathetic." he whispered
"I don't think you are," said Andrew, watching him. "Not for a second"
"I can't even be angry at someone spying on me."
Andrew sighed, looking down. "...I'm sorry"
He frowned refusing to let go of his hand, "It hurt so much..."
Andrew closed his eyes. "I don't deserve you"
He frowned turning his head into Andrew's chest.
Andrew blinked, stunned, before putting an arm around him gently.
He held onto him tightly his fingers gripping his shirt as he tried desperately not to fall apart
Andrew hugged him close, frowning softly as he rubbed his back gently.
He gave a shuddery breath coming back to himself, "I'm sorry." he whispered
"It's alright," he said quietly.
He shook his head, "I just never expected to feel..."
Andrew watched him a moment, before leaning in, pressing his lips gently against Billy's. He wasn't sure if it was the best course of action, but he had to do SOMETHING.
The blond stilled before his arms suddenly clamped on Andrew's keeping him there tight and not letting go as he kissed him achingly.
Andrew squeaked, before returning the aching kiss, his eyes closing tight.
He seemed to be begging, clinging to him like a man dying of thirst.
Andrew whimpered softly, deepening the kiss slowly, moving in close.
Billy stood up as if rising from his knees pulling him close and tight drinking him down, his fingers leaving bruises.
Andrew stood with him, not really having any alterative, gasping softly into the kiss, returning it hungrily.
He groaned he knew he was hurting him but the power overwhelmed him, torn between wanting him and hating him. The power and torment tumultuous in his minds as his hands splayed across his back.
The younger man whimpered a little into the kiss, but didn't fight him, letting himself be pulled in as he kissed him, willing to follow him anywhere.
He broke it with a whimper gasping for air and not letting him go as he simply stared at him.
Andrew panted a little, his lips kiss bruised as he met his gaze, wide-eyed.
Billy watched him his eyes confused and apologetic before he dropped his head again kissing him again biting a little on his lower lip.
Andrew watched him, breathless, before returning the kiss, groaning a little into it.
He groaned his hands pulling him in possessively, almost off his feet as he pawed at him, almost growling at the kiss.
Andrew gasped and stumbled shivering a little as he kissed him, hands grasping at Billy's shirt.
Billy groaned at him tearing his shirt buttons flying and the sharp noise of ripped fabric greeted their ears
Andrew made a soft sound of surprise as his shirt was torn, his eyes darkening a little as he pressed in close.
The smaller man's belt was opened and his jeans nearly following the same way as the shirt as he yanked them down roughly
Andrew squeaked a little as his jeans were pulled down, almost stumbling in them as he watched Billy's actions, his hear thundering in his chest.
Billy undid his own jeans before pushing Andrew against the table, the smell of his beloved cooking enveloping them as he came up behind him before coming to a stop his hands resting on Andrew's hips uncertainly.
Andrew panted softly, gripping the table, his eyes squeezed shut, biting his lower lip, trembling a little.
He frowned leaning over and kissing his head, His hands shaking as he stepped away. "I...I'm sorry."
Andrew untensed carefully, moving to stand, still a little unsure. "I.....it's alright"
"I shouldn't have...I didn't mean to hurt you I...I’m sorry." he murmured pulling up his jeans and stepping away apologetically
Andrew shrugged softly, pulling his own jeans up, avoiding eye contact. "Wouldn't have been the first time, don't worry about it."
He pulled away and slumped to the floor burying his face in his hands "You're not safe..." He whimpered
Andrew frowned softly, moving to sit by him. "Story of my love life," he murmured. "It's nothing I'm not used to."
"I’ll hurt you...I hurt all of them. Look what I almost did."
Andrew sighed, rubbing his arms, knowing bruising would be there by the morning. "Like I said, happened before, I'm starting to think it's all I get"
"You shouldn't you deserve better."
"Not really" said Andrew
"You do," he whispered before frowning looking at his arms, "I'm sorry." He murmured moving to touch his arm tenderly
Andrew shrugged again, looking down. "Don't worry about it, I'll heal."
He frowned softly, running his fingers over it before closing his eyes, "Please forgive me," he whispered resting his forehead on Andrew's shoulder
Andrew frowned softly, his fingers moving to tangle in Billy's hair. "There's nothing to forgive"
"I hurt you," he whispered kissing his bruises and red marks in supplication.
Andrew sighed, watching him. "They'll be okay"
He frowned softly trying to fix Andrew's shirt, "I'll buy you some new clothes...I got ...I was carried away...I have no excuse."
Andrew sighed, watching him. "It's ok, really."
He frowned looking at him upset. "I am sorry...I don't know ...my mind is such a mess I...I never meant to hurt you. I should...I should go but let me pay for them." he asked his hands fumbling in his pocket.
"You don't have to," Andrew put his hand on Billy's wrist, stopping him. "I've had a lot worse, believe me, so don't worry about it"
"Not from me you haven't." he replied with a frown, "Please let me do something."
"I don't know what," sighed Andrew quietly, looking down.
He frowned softly looking around before sighing and pulling his money out taking out over fifty pounds. "For the shirt." he insisted before looking around. "I'll do the dishes for you or something."
"I don't spend this kind of money on a shirt," murmured Andrew, then sighed, closing his eyes. "..You can tell me something"
Billy nodded walking to the sink awkwardly and cleaning the plates, "Anything."
Andrew sighed, opening his eyes to watch him. "Do you want me to go back to Italy tomorrow?"
He frowned dropping the plates in the sink and running the water as a long silence stretched, "I...no." he decided dropping his head
Andrew watched him for a few moments, before nodding to himself. "Alright then, I'll stay."
He frowned softly looking at him, "After what I just did?"
"Like I said, I had worse," Andrew shrugged. "At least you were aware you were doing it"
He turned and looked at him before frowning at his state of undress and taking off his t shirt walking over to him and pulling it over Andrews head to cover him, removing the torn shirt. "What happened?”
Andrew blinked softly at the treatment, before shrugging. "First boyfriend....if you could call him that," he sighed. "He was very... self obsessed."
"He...he attacked you?" he asked softly. folding up the ruined shirt.
"No, he was just very rough when it came to lovemaking," said Andrew, sighing. "I think he was using me, to be honest, but I loved him, so I stayed with him regardless."
He frowned softly, "Did you tell him he was too rough?"
Andrew sighed. "He wasn’t a great listener."
He frowned, "That's not love." he murmured softly.
"No, it's not but I was young and stupid," said Andrew
He frowned, "You're not stupid." he replied before going back to the dishes and washing them.
"No, that's what a few years of being trained as a Watcher does to you," said Andrew. "Back then I was though"
He frowned softly and nodded drying the dishes, "Where did you meet him?"
"In my home town, that evil gang I was in? He was the leader"
"Oh...I'm sorry."
Andrew shrugged with a sigh. "It happens"
"To you rather a lot it seems."
"Yeah," Andrew chuckled. "I'm good at it"
He frowned dying his hands, "I am sorry." he murmured again.
"It's ok" he whispered
"No it's not." He replied crouching before him, "I hurt you...I almost forced you to..." he frowned softly.
"Just because you went about it the wrong way doesn't mean I didn't want it," said Andrew
He looked at him in confusion, "You were trembling."
"Again, wrong way of going about it, but I still..." he sighed, shrugging. "You know how I feel about you"
He frowned, "Even after that?"
"You stopped and apologised, so yeah," he smiled a little.
He frowned looking at him, "Are you sure?"
"Very," he murmured, watching him.
He frowned, "You're insane." he whispered taking his hand.
Andrew smiled down at his hand. "Probably"
He looked at his fingers, "Why?"
"Why am I insane?" Andrew asked, amused.
"Why do you still want me?"
Andrew watched him. "I don't think I could put words to it if I tried"
He sighed softly, "You are quite strange." he whispered
Andrew ducked his head, blushing. "Um....thanks"
"I hadn't realised that was a compliment," he teased a little.
"I was going to take it was one anyway," he smiled
He looked back up at him, "You're really not hurt?"
"No, I'm fine, I promise," he smiled softly.
He nodded, "Well have tomorrow off anyway," he offered, "the rest of the week if you like."
Andrew frowned. "....I don't want to spend time away from you"
He looked down at their hands, "Are you sure?" he asked looking at him worriedly.
"Very," whispered Andrew, watching him quietly, squeezing his hand gently
He looked at him before chewing on his lip, "Alright...come when you like."
"Okay," murmured Andrew, leaning in to kiss his cheek.
He looked up in startled surprise before blushing softly, "Ummm..." he whispered
Andrew smiled shyly, ducking his head
He smiled shyly, "Thanks." he whispered watching him.
"For what?" he smiled
"Forgiving me," he whispered. "And the kiss."
Andrew smiled. "You deserved both," he murmured softly
He smiled blushing a little as he shook his head
Andrew chewed his lip, unsure, before leaning in to give him a proper kiss. "You do"
He blinked looking at him in shock before ducking his head his ears going bright red, "Thank you."
Andrew blushed in response. "You're welcome"
He nodded standing up wrapping his arms around himself "Umm I...I should probably go" he whispered with a nod
"Oh....okay" he whispered softly.
He looked at him, "I liked the kiss," he insisted reassuringly
"Yeah?" he whispered, a little worried.
He smiled crouching down in front of him, "May I?"
"You don't even have to ask," Andrew murmured with a soft smile.
He blushed, "I liked the kiss," he insisted leaning in and cupping his cheek as he kissed him ever so gently.
Andrew sighed softly, returning it, his eyes drifting closed
He smiled a little, sighing gently as he massaged him breathing him in as blissful forgiveness washed over him.
The younger man sighed into it, his fingers moving to thread through Billy's hair as they kissed
He sighed softly tasting his lips sinking properly onto his knees as he stroked his jaw
Andrew deepened the kiss gently, shifting closer.
He parted his lips letting him take control.
Andrew made a small sound as he shifted in, his tongue brushing over Billy's lips.
He gasped a little his free hand sliding down and grasping his hand their fingers intertwining
He moaned softly into the kiss, squeezing his hand gently.
He smiled softly kissing him deeply his other hand leaving Andrew's cheek to bury in his hair.
Andrew shivered lightly, before breaking for air, watching him with bright blue eyes.
Billy pulled back before his eyes opened and he gazed into his eyes, his face flushed. His smile widened shyly as he bit his lip breaking from his gaze
"Um" Andrew blushed, ducking his head softly.
He smiled lifting up his hand and kissing the palm of it shyly
Andrew blushed deeper. "I...thanks"
He smiled "I really should go," he whispered softly shyly. "Believe me I really want to stay but right now is probably not the best time."
"Ok," murmured Andrew softly. "I...I can see you again soon though, right?"
He smiled softly and nodded, "I could take us out for lunch when you come back to work."
"Okay," Andrew smiled happily. "I'd like that"
He smiled softly, "Italian?" he murmured
"That would be great," he murmured happily
He nodded smiling and slipping his jacket over his bare chest and zipping it up.
"I do have spare shirts, you know," chuckled Andrew. "Not to make your act of chivalry any less or anything"
He shrugged, "It's alright," he replied with a smile. standing up.
"If you're sure," he smiled softly, standing with him
He nodded, "It doesn't quite work if you give it back," he replied smiling.
"Okay" he chuckled walking him to the door. "Well...thanks for it, then"
He smiled leaning in for a kiss, "Goodnight, thanks for dinner. "
Andrew blushed, returning it. "You're welcome," he murmured. "I'll...I'll see you soon"
Thank you for staying," he replied stepping out into the hall before smiling at him and walking down, he turned glancing back at him with a smile before laughing shyly as he disappeared off outside.
Andrew smiled, watching him go, before chewing his lip happily, closing his door and moving to unpack.
When: Day after the date from Hell
Where: Andrew’s apartment
What: Making up. R
Andrew stepped around his apartment nervously as he checked on his cooking meal, trying to focus on that and not on weather or not Pietro had convinced Billy to come back or not.
A few minutes later the doorbell rang ominously
Andrew took a calming breath, preparing for the worst, before walking over, opening the door nervously.
Pietro smiled at him before he shoved Billy in, The doc frowned stumbling before straightening and standing there his hands shoved into his pockets.
"Oh" Andrew blinked in surprise. "You....you came"
He frowned and nodded glancing at the caret. He said you wanted to talk."
"I do, I....thank you for coming," he glanced over at Pietro, mouthing a silent thanks
Pietro grinned, "Good luck," he mouthed with a wink before looking at Billy, "I'm going to head off, have fun you two." he gushed before zipping out of the room, the door closing behind him. Billy looked around the apartment, their last conversation hadn't gone over so well here.
Andrew blinked as Pietro vanished, before sighing, looking down. "...Doc..I..." he sighed, closing his eyes. "I really am sorry"
The blond looked at him before frowning and avoiding his gaze. "So you say."
Andrew raised his head ot look at him. "I do. I never wanted to hurt you. I'm sorry I lied, but I didn't lie about my feelings, not once."
He frowned softly, "Why did you spy on me?"
"To see if you were a danger..I...I worked with someone like you before. They murdered two people. I needed to make sure you weren't like that, and you're not."
"So sure I won't kill people?"
"Certain" said Andrew.
He frowned softly looking down, "Well you're wrong."
Andrew blinked, surprised. "...What do you mean?"
He looked at him, I've killed people Andrew, someone I loved. You have to make a decision first I think.
"Oh...." Andrew frowned, then looked at him. "A decision?"
Whether this apology is worth it."
Andrew looked up at him. "I still think it is"
He sighed looking away and shifting on his feet.
Andrew watched him. "I know the sort of man you are."
"Hmm yes well...I think I may know more." he replied looking over at the photo again with a frown. "If I was a threat what would you have done?"
Andrew sighed. "I would have informed my boss and we'd have kept an eye on you. Moved to stop you if you'd tried anything"
"Killing me?"
"No," said Andrew. "Just...keeping you out of the way."
"Imprisonment?"
"Until you could be stopped being made a threat," said Andrew, sighing. "We have a witch."
He raised a brow, "You'd mentally castrate me?"
"Just remove certain memories," murmured Andrew
He frowned lifting his head finally watching him. "remove my memories?"
Andrew nodded. "It's a last resort, but yeah."
He frowned looking away, "What gives you that right?"
"It's what we do," Andrew shrugged. "To keep people safe"
He frowned putting the photo face down, "Yes well"
"You wanted me to be honest," said Andrew, shrugging quietly.
He nodded, "Yes...seeing your future like that is a little shocking."
"I'm sorry," said Andrew quietly.
He frowned, "So essentially if you had come to me a few months ago I'd be gibbering into my soup?"
"No, she doesn't make it that bad, you'd still function, just not remember the things that drove you to do bad," Andrew frowned. "I don't believe you're a killer"
"Well I am one." H replied walking to the window.
Andrew watched him. "...Tell me"
"Tell you, are you planning to tell back to them?"
Andrew shook his head. "No, I don't want to"
"I didn't ask if you wanted to, I asked if you would."
"I won't," said Andrew softly. "I'm not working now"
"When do you start working?"
"Never with you again, I quit your case" said Andrew
"My case? There's a file somewhere with my name on it?"
"I mean case in a general term, no files," said Andrew
"Oh, why did you quit?"
"Because I didn't want to anymore," murmured Andrew quietly. "....I was personally involved"
Right," He relied shaking his head as he looked around before noticing the smells coming from the kitchen
"Oh...I'm cooking dinner, if you want any?" asked Andrew
He frowned softly, "I should probably go," he murmured with a frown looking at the door uncertainly.
"No, please stay" whispered Andrew
He frowned softly looking at him, "Why?"
"I want you to," said Andrew softly.
He frowned stilling, "He said I owed you that much." he murmured
Andrew glanced down. "I......only stay if you want to," he said quietly
He frowned before sighing and sitting down at the table.
Andrew blinked, before smiling softly, moving to dish him out a plate. "Thank you"
He nodded looking around with a sigh. "That's a lot of food for one person considering you're leaving."
"I'm an optimist," Andrew shrugged softly.
"Were you cooking for me?"
Andrew ducked his head. "....Yeah"
"Oh..." He replied "Thanks." he mumbled.
"Thank you for staying," smiled Andrew, placing the plate in front of him.
He nodded, “You wanted to talk." he murmured taking a bite.
Andrew smiled, getting a plate for himself and sitting beside him. "....I wanted to apologise...I really am sorry. I never wanted to hurt you"
"You spoke to me...you didn't have to."
Andrew sighed. "....I really like you, I couldn't....I wanted to get to know you"
"I truste..." He frowned biting his lip and remaining silent
Andrew looked down. "....I really am sorry," he whispered. "I haven't told them anything, other than you're not a threat. They'll leave you alone"
He frowned poking at his food, "Did you ever think the world needed a change?"
"Yeah, I did," said Andrew. "But there's ways of going about it"
"You think they haven't been tried?"
"I know," Andrew sighed and shrugged. "I just....the non violent was is better"
"You consider war and famine unviolent?"
"No, no I don't" Andrew sighed
"Well we're doing a bang up job so far." he replied eating with a sigh, he missed Andrew's food
Andrew sighed, poking about at his food on the plate. "...Yeah, well....Pietro said I had to try again," he said quietly. "...I was heading back to Italy, so you wouldn't have to deal with me in your life"
"Why did you agree that you had to try again?"
Andrew closed his eyes sadly. "A little part of me wanted to hope that you still cared"
"Do I matter that much?"
"You matter very much," said Andrew quietly, looking up at him.
He frowned softly watching him, "What was it about me that changed you?
"I just got to know you," said Andrew softly. "....And started to fall for what I saw"
He frowned softly chewing on his thumb gently. "You're watching the wrong man."
"You say that," Andrew shrugged. "I tend to disagree"
He sighed softly rubbing his temple, "You hurt me Andrew."
"I know," said Andrew quietly. "....And I know I don't deserve you"
He frowned, “Just...give me some way to trust you."
"How?" asked Andrew softly. "I'll do anything"
He sighed, "I don't know," he murmured pushing his plate away "You told me because you wanted to know me...I could've killed you."
Andrew shrugged softly. "That seems to be a constant in the men I get attracted to"
"It'll be your death." he replied humourlessly
"Probably," said Andrew. "Had a few close shaves already, bound to get me eventually"
"And you're happy with that?"
Andrew shrugged. "I'm happy with you"
He looked at him contemplatively before sighing, "I must be a fool."
Andrew frowned softly, watching him in confusion.
He looked at him, the excitement of kissing him, the electricity from his fingers as they brushed his own. The warmth that filled him with each meal and the terrifying fear when he first discovered he felt something after being dead for so long. These rushed through his mind colouring the hurt and betrayal, the pain at having it all ripped away.
Andrew shifted under his gaze, a little worried. "Doctor?"
"You're so confusing."
"I've been told that," said Andrew, ducking his head
"Before you I was...I died when Penny did. I couldn't feel a thing. Before you I was existing...surviving."
Andrew winced. "Please don't say I made that worse"
"I woke up one day..and I was watching the minutes...the seconds until you would come through the door and sort through my mail."
"You.....you were? he asked softly, watching him wide eyed, still a little unsure.
He nodded, "I caught myself doing it once...I was terrified."
"I'm.....sorry?" he tried
"I didn't know what to do..." he continued so I ignored it...but I found I was looking forward to it to you coming around...I was living again.
"Oh," Andrew blushed a little. "You...really?"
He nodded softly the frown still on his face. "Yes...that's why you're so confusing Andrew...you stir all this up in me, I want to hurt you but I can't bear to see you cry."
"Oh," Andrew frowned a little. "I....what do you want me to do?"
"I don't know..." he whispered his voice cracking a little
Andrew tentatively put his hand over Billy's. "I....I can leave...if... if that makes it easier."
He closed his eyes his hand clasping his tightly "Don’t leave."
Andrew blinked, his fingers curling around Billy's. "Alright," he whispered softly. "I won't"
He dropped his head, "I'm pathetic." he whispered
"I don't think you are," said Andrew, watching him. "Not for a second"
"I can't even be angry at someone spying on me."
Andrew sighed, looking down. "...I'm sorry"
He frowned refusing to let go of his hand, "It hurt so much..."
Andrew closed his eyes. "I don't deserve you"
He frowned turning his head into Andrew's chest.
Andrew blinked, stunned, before putting an arm around him gently.
He held onto him tightly his fingers gripping his shirt as he tried desperately not to fall apart
Andrew hugged him close, frowning softly as he rubbed his back gently.
He gave a shuddery breath coming back to himself, "I'm sorry." he whispered
"It's alright," he said quietly.
He shook his head, "I just never expected to feel..."
Andrew watched him a moment, before leaning in, pressing his lips gently against Billy's. He wasn't sure if it was the best course of action, but he had to do SOMETHING.
The blond stilled before his arms suddenly clamped on Andrew's keeping him there tight and not letting go as he kissed him achingly.
Andrew squeaked, before returning the aching kiss, his eyes closing tight.
He seemed to be begging, clinging to him like a man dying of thirst.
Andrew whimpered softly, deepening the kiss slowly, moving in close.
Billy stood up as if rising from his knees pulling him close and tight drinking him down, his fingers leaving bruises.
Andrew stood with him, not really having any alterative, gasping softly into the kiss, returning it hungrily.
He groaned he knew he was hurting him but the power overwhelmed him, torn between wanting him and hating him. The power and torment tumultuous in his minds as his hands splayed across his back.
The younger man whimpered a little into the kiss, but didn't fight him, letting himself be pulled in as he kissed him, willing to follow him anywhere.
He broke it with a whimper gasping for air and not letting him go as he simply stared at him.
Andrew panted a little, his lips kiss bruised as he met his gaze, wide-eyed.
Billy watched him his eyes confused and apologetic before he dropped his head again kissing him again biting a little on his lower lip.
Andrew watched him, breathless, before returning the kiss, groaning a little into it.
He groaned his hands pulling him in possessively, almost off his feet as he pawed at him, almost growling at the kiss.
Andrew gasped and stumbled shivering a little as he kissed him, hands grasping at Billy's shirt.
Billy groaned at him tearing his shirt buttons flying and the sharp noise of ripped fabric greeted their ears
Andrew made a soft sound of surprise as his shirt was torn, his eyes darkening a little as he pressed in close.
The smaller man's belt was opened and his jeans nearly following the same way as the shirt as he yanked them down roughly
Andrew squeaked a little as his jeans were pulled down, almost stumbling in them as he watched Billy's actions, his hear thundering in his chest.
Billy undid his own jeans before pushing Andrew against the table, the smell of his beloved cooking enveloping them as he came up behind him before coming to a stop his hands resting on Andrew's hips uncertainly.
Andrew panted softly, gripping the table, his eyes squeezed shut, biting his lower lip, trembling a little.
He frowned leaning over and kissing his head, His hands shaking as he stepped away. "I...I'm sorry."
Andrew untensed carefully, moving to stand, still a little unsure. "I.....it's alright"
"I shouldn't have...I didn't mean to hurt you I...I’m sorry." he murmured pulling up his jeans and stepping away apologetically
Andrew shrugged softly, pulling his own jeans up, avoiding eye contact. "Wouldn't have been the first time, don't worry about it."
He pulled away and slumped to the floor burying his face in his hands "You're not safe..." He whimpered
Andrew frowned softly, moving to sit by him. "Story of my love life," he murmured. "It's nothing I'm not used to."
"I’ll hurt you...I hurt all of them. Look what I almost did."
Andrew sighed, rubbing his arms, knowing bruising would be there by the morning. "Like I said, happened before, I'm starting to think it's all I get"
"You shouldn't you deserve better."
"Not really" said Andrew
"You do," he whispered before frowning looking at his arms, "I'm sorry." He murmured moving to touch his arm tenderly
Andrew shrugged again, looking down. "Don't worry about it, I'll heal."
He frowned softly, running his fingers over it before closing his eyes, "Please forgive me," he whispered resting his forehead on Andrew's shoulder
Andrew frowned softly, his fingers moving to tangle in Billy's hair. "There's nothing to forgive"
"I hurt you," he whispered kissing his bruises and red marks in supplication.
Andrew sighed, watching him. "They'll be okay"
He frowned softly trying to fix Andrew's shirt, "I'll buy you some new clothes...I got ...I was carried away...I have no excuse."
Andrew sighed, watching him. "It's ok, really."
He frowned looking at him upset. "I am sorry...I don't know ...my mind is such a mess I...I never meant to hurt you. I should...I should go but let me pay for them." he asked his hands fumbling in his pocket.
"You don't have to," Andrew put his hand on Billy's wrist, stopping him. "I've had a lot worse, believe me, so don't worry about it"
"Not from me you haven't." he replied with a frown, "Please let me do something."
"I don't know what," sighed Andrew quietly, looking down.
He frowned softly looking around before sighing and pulling his money out taking out over fifty pounds. "For the shirt." he insisted before looking around. "I'll do the dishes for you or something."
"I don't spend this kind of money on a shirt," murmured Andrew, then sighed, closing his eyes. "..You can tell me something"
Billy nodded walking to the sink awkwardly and cleaning the plates, "Anything."
Andrew sighed, opening his eyes to watch him. "Do you want me to go back to Italy tomorrow?"
He frowned dropping the plates in the sink and running the water as a long silence stretched, "I...no." he decided dropping his head
Andrew watched him for a few moments, before nodding to himself. "Alright then, I'll stay."
He frowned softly looking at him, "After what I just did?"
"Like I said, I had worse," Andrew shrugged. "At least you were aware you were doing it"
He turned and looked at him before frowning at his state of undress and taking off his t shirt walking over to him and pulling it over Andrews head to cover him, removing the torn shirt. "What happened?”
Andrew blinked softly at the treatment, before shrugging. "First boyfriend....if you could call him that," he sighed. "He was very... self obsessed."
"He...he attacked you?" he asked softly. folding up the ruined shirt.
"No, he was just very rough when it came to lovemaking," said Andrew, sighing. "I think he was using me, to be honest, but I loved him, so I stayed with him regardless."
He frowned softly, "Did you tell him he was too rough?"
Andrew sighed. "He wasn’t a great listener."
He frowned, "That's not love." he murmured softly.
"No, it's not but I was young and stupid," said Andrew
He frowned, "You're not stupid." he replied before going back to the dishes and washing them.
"No, that's what a few years of being trained as a Watcher does to you," said Andrew. "Back then I was though"
He frowned softly and nodded drying the dishes, "Where did you meet him?"
"In my home town, that evil gang I was in? He was the leader"
"Oh...I'm sorry."
Andrew shrugged with a sigh. "It happens"
"To you rather a lot it seems."
"Yeah," Andrew chuckled. "I'm good at it"
He frowned dying his hands, "I am sorry." he murmured again.
"It's ok" he whispered
"No it's not." He replied crouching before him, "I hurt you...I almost forced you to..." he frowned softly.
"Just because you went about it the wrong way doesn't mean I didn't want it," said Andrew
He looked at him in confusion, "You were trembling."
"Again, wrong way of going about it, but I still..." he sighed, shrugging. "You know how I feel about you"
He frowned, "Even after that?"
"You stopped and apologised, so yeah," he smiled a little.
He frowned looking at him, "Are you sure?"
"Very," he murmured, watching him.
He frowned, "You're insane." he whispered taking his hand.
Andrew smiled down at his hand. "Probably"
He looked at his fingers, "Why?"
"Why am I insane?" Andrew asked, amused.
"Why do you still want me?"
Andrew watched him. "I don't think I could put words to it if I tried"
He sighed softly, "You are quite strange." he whispered
Andrew ducked his head, blushing. "Um....thanks"
"I hadn't realised that was a compliment," he teased a little.
"I was going to take it was one anyway," he smiled
He looked back up at him, "You're really not hurt?"
"No, I'm fine, I promise," he smiled softly.
He nodded, "Well have tomorrow off anyway," he offered, "the rest of the week if you like."
Andrew frowned. "....I don't want to spend time away from you"
He looked down at their hands, "Are you sure?" he asked looking at him worriedly.
"Very," whispered Andrew, watching him quietly, squeezing his hand gently
He looked at him before chewing on his lip, "Alright...come when you like."
"Okay," murmured Andrew, leaning in to kiss his cheek.
He looked up in startled surprise before blushing softly, "Ummm..." he whispered
Andrew smiled shyly, ducking his head
He smiled shyly, "Thanks." he whispered watching him.
"For what?" he smiled
"Forgiving me," he whispered. "And the kiss."
Andrew smiled. "You deserved both," he murmured softly
He smiled blushing a little as he shook his head
Andrew chewed his lip, unsure, before leaning in to give him a proper kiss. "You do"
He blinked looking at him in shock before ducking his head his ears going bright red, "Thank you."
Andrew blushed in response. "You're welcome"
He nodded standing up wrapping his arms around himself "Umm I...I should probably go" he whispered with a nod
"Oh....okay" he whispered softly.
He looked at him, "I liked the kiss," he insisted reassuringly
"Yeah?" he whispered, a little worried.
He smiled crouching down in front of him, "May I?"
"You don't even have to ask," Andrew murmured with a soft smile.
He blushed, "I liked the kiss," he insisted leaning in and cupping his cheek as he kissed him ever so gently.
Andrew sighed softly, returning it, his eyes drifting closed
He smiled a little, sighing gently as he massaged him breathing him in as blissful forgiveness washed over him.
The younger man sighed into it, his fingers moving to thread through Billy's hair as they kissed
He sighed softly tasting his lips sinking properly onto his knees as he stroked his jaw
Andrew deepened the kiss gently, shifting closer.
He parted his lips letting him take control.
Andrew made a small sound as he shifted in, his tongue brushing over Billy's lips.
He gasped a little his free hand sliding down and grasping his hand their fingers intertwining
He moaned softly into the kiss, squeezing his hand gently.
He smiled softly kissing him deeply his other hand leaving Andrew's cheek to bury in his hair.
Andrew shivered lightly, before breaking for air, watching him with bright blue eyes.
Billy pulled back before his eyes opened and he gazed into his eyes, his face flushed. His smile widened shyly as he bit his lip breaking from his gaze
"Um" Andrew blushed, ducking his head softly.
He smiled lifting up his hand and kissing the palm of it shyly
Andrew blushed deeper. "I...thanks"
He smiled "I really should go," he whispered softly shyly. "Believe me I really want to stay but right now is probably not the best time."
"Ok," murmured Andrew softly. "I...I can see you again soon though, right?"
He smiled softly and nodded, "I could take us out for lunch when you come back to work."
"Okay," Andrew smiled happily. "I'd like that"
He smiled softly, "Italian?" he murmured
"That would be great," he murmured happily
He nodded smiling and slipping his jacket over his bare chest and zipping it up.
"I do have spare shirts, you know," chuckled Andrew. "Not to make your act of chivalry any less or anything"
He shrugged, "It's alright," he replied with a smile. standing up.
"If you're sure," he smiled softly, standing with him
He nodded, "It doesn't quite work if you give it back," he replied smiling.
"Okay" he chuckled walking him to the door. "Well...thanks for it, then"
He smiled leaning in for a kiss, "Goodnight, thanks for dinner. "
Andrew blushed, returning it. "You're welcome," he murmured. "I'll...I'll see you soon"
Thank you for staying," he replied stepping out into the hall before smiling at him and walking down, he turned glancing back at him with a smile before laughing shyly as he disappeared off outside.
Andrew smiled, watching him go, before chewing his lip happily, closing his door and moving to unpack.