Sihouette 05: Sort Of
05. Sort Of
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Seohyun stood against the wall her body rigid and her heart thumping inside her as if desperate to run away. But turning and running away was not an option anymore especially when there was nowhere to run to. She was standing in a dead end and the only exit is where Jung Yonghwa stood with another student, specifically a girl, Hwang Tiffany.
She'd known Tiffany to be the prettiest in the campus when she transferred to the school at the start of High School coming from the states. Everyone was mesmerized by her and she was too, though she admired her beauty like everyone else, she admired her more by her uplifting personality. She was kind and humble as a person. No wonder Yonghwa's always been close to her.
Though the only thing she really knows about them is that Yonghwa is different around Tiffany. He looks relaxed, comfortable, and even happy. People always speculated their relationship with each other but they always denied it and it was at least believable to others when Yonghwa dated different girls. But not to her. She knew what they had been something different from all the girls he dated.
Seohyun felt a pang of guilt as she watched them converse with each other so easily. They were so perfect together. Her long dark brown curls fell on her shoulder gracefully as she stood facing Yonghwa, a smile radiating her beauty reaching to her crescent eyes.
She turned to the empty dead end of the hallway and sighed. Kyuhyun would be waiting for her at the front gate so they could visit Yoona as planned, but how in the world would she be able to pass by them without getting noticed?
There was no other way, she realized as she mentally prepared herself. She felt the usual nerve-wrecking feeling inside her as she started to walk forward keeping her eyes low, half walking - half running, as if they didn't exist.
"Seohyun-ssi!"
She stopped but didn't turn around, hating herself in the process. She already stood a good distance away from them so when he didn't say anymore, she started walking away again. This time more hurried than before. The memory from the other day when he asked her to be his friend played vividly inside his head; a basket of emotions whirling inside him.
She walked forward reaching Kyuhyun who was smiling at her as usual. "What happened to you?" He asked raising an eyebrow.
She finally grasped in control and smiled at him. "Sorry. I had to drop by in my locker. Did you wait long?"
His smile lit up. "It's okay. I called Yoong that we would be stopping by. Do you want to stop by a store to buy something we could bring to her? She was complaining how auntie wouldn't fill her enough food" he laughed.
Seohyun laughed with him and nodded. "I'm sure that's all the reason she needs us, Kyu. Let's go? We wouldn't want to make her wait."
Kyuhyun nodded smiling as they started walking. "I heard you're presenting your class for the music festival"
Seohyun sighed, remembering. "Yes. But really, I don't anything about music, Kyu. I don't know what to do."
Kyuhyun chuckled. "Yeah you do! Remember when we went to noraebang with Yoona? Just the three of us? You got the best score out of all us! Yoona was even furious that I beat her, remember?"
Seohyun smiled remembering a little about how they all had fun that time but still felt unease about herself. "That was just pure luck! You were a little out of yourself so I won. It doesn't count Kyu. Jung Yonghwa is..." she trails off when she notices Kyuhyun stop at his tracks which made her stop too.
As she looked back at him she caught the concern in his eyes. "I'll be at the competition too. I can help you out if you want." He smiled a little. "Will you let me?"
She nodded adding a small smile. "Thanks. I wouldn't know what to do without you and Yoona, you know." And it was true. Im Yoona and Cho Kyuhyun have always been there for her. They've always been inseparable. Besides having her parents, Yoona and Kyuhyun were like the siblings she never had.
She smiled up to him tugging him in the arm to go on while her own mind wandered around the scene she saw just a moment ago.
She reminded herself once again that jealousy wasn't for her, especially when it came to Jung Yonghwa. But still, it didn't help to ignore the pain.
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The day after... Saturday
Yonghwa stared blankly at the pale blue sky above him wondering what the hell was he doing at Seo Juhyun's doorstep this early morning when it's Saturday and he obviously doesn't have any reason to be there or to see her.
The only thing he really has in mind is finding out what happened yesterday when called her out and he saw her stop but instead she seemed to have ignored him. It bothered and annoyed him at the same time especially when he followed her only to find her running to Cho Kyuhyun.
Yes, she had informed him that she won't be able to help him after school but why did she have to ignore him when she obviously past by him? Was she still that uncomfortable with him? He wondered to himself for a long time until...
"Yonghwa-ssi..." He turned around meeting her gaze and suddenly he's loss for words just like she seemed to be.
He had to blink himself to reality to realize he was staring. "Hi... Good morning."
"W-What are you doing here? It's Saturday..." She trails off and he noticed the panic in her eyes.
He forced a small smile despite his nerves tingling. "I know. But I was wondering if we could... you could help me today since we didn't get to meet up yesterday. I mean, it’s okay if you don't want to... if you have something else to do, I'll just go..." His words came out hasty and wrong than what he intended to.
No, he wasn't really intending to leave and a part of him hoped that she wouldn't let him.
She didn't answer bringing her head down and he could tell she was thinking.
When she finally looked up to him, she saw the hesitations in her eyes just like the first time he had talked to her.
"Actually, I was going to drop by the music store to study for the... music festival and then to the library..." She trails off fidgeting with her hands nervously.
He smiled remembering that he still hadn't started helping her. "Can I come with you then? I promised I'd help you right?"
She nodded slightly, hesitating. "You really don't have to. I could find someone else-"
"But I want to." He said abruptly without thinking, surprising himself and her. And the fact that he meant it gave him a weird feeling he can't quite name at the moment.
She flashed him a grateful smile gave him a small bow. "Thank you..."
For some reason, he couldn't stop his smile from growing. "So, you're letting me go with you?"
She nodded flashing another grateful smile, not missing the spark he saw in her eyes.
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Seohyun thinks this moment has to be a dream. And if it is, she doesn't want to wake up from it.
The music filling her ears were enough to exclude everyone else in the room except for one person. Yonghwa. He stood scanning the shelves of music like he could go on forever. One plug hung into her ear and the other hang into his.
She'd never really seen this side of him before. Even though she knew he loved music, there was pleasure in his eyes whenever he talked about it. Like he was in another world, almost unreachable. She saw the contentment in his eyes. Something that she missed watching him all these years.
"Do you have any favorite singer, Seohyun-ssi?" He turned to her suddenly catching her off guard.
She could feel the heat rising on her cheeks. "Neh?"
A small smile playing at his lips. "Favorite singer or artist. Do you have any?"
She shook her head slightly, embarrassed. "I have weird preference in music..."
"How do you know?" He seemed genuinely curious.
"Kyuhyun and Yoona told me that I just do."
He smiled at that. "Try me. I promise I won't say anything mean, Seohyun-ssi. What kind of music do you listen to?"
After a moment of hesitation, she realized she didn't have any choice but to tell him. He could feel his gaze focus on her even with her head down. "When I was young," she started "I really liked Keroro songs... and I kind of still do." she finished her voice now just above the whisper.
When she heard him laugh, she buried her face with her hands knowing she was blushing terribly and there was probably no way to escape this embarrassment.
"I'm sorry... I didn't mean to laugh. It's just I find it rather cute." He smiled at her seeming to mean it. "Is there anything else?"
She lifted her head remembering a piano piece that she once heard him play. "Yiruma. Kiss the rain. I like that one."
He smiled she knew almost instantly the reason why. "I don't really play the piano much. But whenever I do, I always play that song. It has a nice melody..." he trails off suddenly looking away.
She nodded agreeing. "Maybe I can teach you how to play." He said turning to her again with the same smile. "That is, if you want me to."
"I'd love to." She smiled to him meeting his gaze. She saw a flicker of gratitude and something she can't quite name.
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"Seohyun-ssi, can you take a look at this?" Yonghwa scans the whole paper briefly before turning to the figure next to him, only to find Seohyun with her eyes close and her head leaning on the books behind her.
The library was quiet as ever and there were only a few people around. They both sat in between the bookshelves, near the windows. The sun was still high and bright with a few passing clouds.
With her eyes close, she looked almost like a child. Her breathing was even but her brows were slowly creasing and he found himself wondering if she was dreaming. Her familiar scent filled his senses.
He felt a twinge of guilt for making her work so hard. After all, who was he to her? She was nice enough to put up with him.
After a moment of hesitations, he found himself inching closer to her closing the gap between them. He carefully caught her head and slowly placed it on his shoulder careful not to wake her up.
He suddenly remembers the time when he had asked for her help and she refused at first. But until now he still wondered why she had come back running that night. What made her change her mind? He wanted to ask but knew that he didn't have the right to.
He knew he made uncomfortable in ways he couldn't tell how or why. And somehow, somewhat, he's determined to change that of her. He owed her too much and the last thing he could think of is hurting her in any way possible.
Sighing to himself, he forced the thoughts of her away focusing on the book in front of him and keeping his body still. At that moment, a warm sensation washed through him that he couldn't quite name. It confuses and surprises him at the same time.
He turned to her unconsciously with the sunlight touching her cheeks, her eyelashes fluttered lifting her head slowly, turning to him slowly. For what it felt like forever, he stared at the clear warm brown eyes, staring back at his as the heart inside him paced rapidly.
And time stood still.
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A/N: Can I just say my life had been a complete chaos this past months? Please don't hang me yet. Lol. Even though I know you guys want to xD Anyway, I'm really sorry for disappearing suddenly T_T & thank you so much for your patience! My summer officially ended and the life of being a HS grad is totally sucking the life out me>.< not that I mind tho. & we had a huge problem with our house so I had to take a break from writing. SO I hope you guys understand:D As usual, I'll try my best to update fast as soon as I can but I wont make any promises since I still have WORLDS WITHIN & SILHOUETTE with me.
Thank you so much for reading and subscribing! I'm just happy that I have you guys^_______________^