Better late than never
Author's note: Aw its been such a long time since I've seen so many new post in LJ! It's overflowing~ Anyway, I'm sending my infinite love for Yongseo and for being a goguma by this short writing! Hope it doesn't such much since it written hastily ;P Happy 1000th days for uri Yongseo!
"Hello? Hyun? This is Yonghwa. It's been a while hasn't it? I'm sorry for calling this late and for leaving this message to voice mail. But, I, uh, just remembered that today is like a special day as I was informed, so I was going to invite you to dinner and tell you about it. Also, I kind of have something else important to tell you. By the way, you don't have to give me a, um, reply. I'll just wait for you like old times. I mean, it’s okay if you're too busy and all. I'll understand. Um, goodbye then. I, uh, I guess I'll see you if you come. Thanks, bye again."
Seohyun is not heartless, no, maybe a little uptight, yes, but never indifferent.
Some people may think she doesn't feel as much from others but to say they're wrong just makes them right so she keeps her silence instead.
Two years ago when she met a man with so much dreams, passion, enthusiasm, and a basket of emotions along him, for her, it amazed and scared her at the same time. He stumbled in her life like a surprise gift she never expected nor did she want at the given moment.
That man was Jung Yonghwa.
The man who gave her one and a million swirling emotions all at once whenever he set his deep dark brown eyes at her. Or whenever she noticed his playful grin stretch up reaching his eyes. Or his music that carried the man who he is.
As much as she wants to deny the cliché of falling for one man in so many given moments, she can't. At least not to herself. He was her first love, after all. She hadn't fully realized that until the end of their so called 'marriage' when she told him she wouldn't cry but she did. When she started to walk away from him but she couldn't. Instead she turned around to walk back at him as if she needed and wanted an assurance that he wouldn't disappear from her and maybe her life.
It was the first time it scared her to love someone too. The thought of loving someone so much that in one impulsive moment she imagined a life with him and not the life she'd been dreaming of.
But, she is Seo Juhyun in reality. The maknae of SNSD. The ambitious young woman who had her dreams, career, family, and responsibilities she needed and wanted to protect desperately.
And he is Jung Yonghwa in reality. The leader of a band that was currently on the verge of rising as talented artist. The ambitious, though carefree man that had dreams, career, family, and responsibilities he needed and wanted to protect as much as her.
And so instead, she threaded the line of friendship with him. It was something inevitable for both of them anyway. And something she can only hold on and keep after all that they had.
But now, up to this day, those thousand days she had endured and stopped herself felt like she was a lifetime too late of being with the man she'd dreamed of secretly and the uncertainty still lingers on her thoughts.
"Are you going to keep staring at your phone like that, Seohyun?" Hyoyeon chided in but Seohyun didn't move one bit as she contemplated whether to answer her unnie's question or just come up with another excuse as to why she's distracted again for the countless times of the day.
She shook her head a moment later, realizing that Hyoyeon would always see through her lies no matter what. "I don't know what to do, unnie." She turns, finding Hyoyeon sitting on her side of the room.
"Are you sure? Because I think you do. You're just scared to do it."
"What if... what if... Ah, I really don't know. There's so many ifs in my head right now that I don't even know where to begin , unnie. Like, what if he doesn't feel the same way anymore? What if I'm too late? What if things get complicated? What if everything that I feel now are all wrong? What do I do then?"
"The thing is, Hyun, you never really will know the answers to those ifs if you never went after them in the first place. Besides, there's no such things as 'easy' when it comes to risking your heart on the line. Things will get complicated, messy, and definitely hard at times. But those things are part of loving someone, whether you're famous or not, believe me. Go out and meet him. You'll find out whether he still feels the same or not."
- - - - - - - - - -
"Oppa..."
"Hyun... is everything okay? Are you... coming?"
"Oppa, I'm sorry I keep making you wait. I'm sorry they had to partner you up with an uptight stubborn person like me when you could have met a more beautiful woman who would've made everything easier for you. I'm sorry that I'm such a lousy friend all these times. I'm sorry I wasn't-"
"No, Hyun. I can wait for you as long as you need me to. And you don't know how thankful I am for meeting you in that night as my wife. You were perfect then and you're perfect to me up to now. You have no idea how happy I am that I got to create those priceless memories with you. All the minutes, hours, days, months, and years since I met you were the times I felt most alive, Seohyun. There's nothing you can say that will change those for me. Do you understand?"
Seohyun nodded despite her tears streaming down carelessly on her cheeks not even bothering to wipe them. Everything felt overwhelming at the moment that she fell silent, until she finally caught her breath looking up through the window where he could see Yonghwa standing still on his back.
"Hyun?"
"Oppa... I have something to say."
"Tell me. I'm listening."
"Will you turn around for me?" And he did, immediately his soft gaze on her. She could feel small delights of tingling pleasure spreading on her whole being as he beamed at her.
"Happy 1000th days, Seo Juhyun."
"I love you, oppa."