Narcissism

[kjc]

Is narcissism bad? It seems like we're all doing it: blogging, twittering, facebooking, etc. I enjoy some of it, mainly because I find many people fascinating. And a whole hell of a lot of them are funny. I like funny. I encourage people to talk about themselves. I love hearing stories and anecdotes, explanations for a particular point of

Comments

[kjc]

One definition of irony is "incongruity between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result" - so while it would be ironic to YOU, given that you expect them to respond with logic, that they seek and find patterns, it is not ironic to them

[foomf]

Wait, what do you mean by "narcissism" here?

Self-absorbtion? Positive self-esteem? Egomania? Narcissistic Personality Disorder? An uncontrollable desire to stare into reflecting pools?

I use public social networking to fill in for some of the in-person interactions I would rather be having (darned extraversion) although it's rather like fake blood to a vampire. (Yeah, reading silly vampire romance earlier today.)
My current "dry spell" perhaps came about because I'm spending less time thinking about my feelings, which is probably not good for me, but seems to have been necessary to some degree because of the year of enforced introspection.

[kjc]

Self-absorption, in the main.

Am I having conversations with people in my LJ/twitter account or inviting them to think about me, hoping for praise?

[foomf]

Would it be a bad thing if you were?

Sometimes we all need some emotional reassurance from outside our usual channels.

(CityofHeroes geekery: /e praise )

[rmd]

btw: i think much facebook/twitter/lj/etc is not so much narcissism as just pleasant bullshitting. the narcissism is when you have expectations about how other people will react.

I have that problem where, if I'm not brilliant at something, I suck.
i have that about some stuff, and - at least for me - that kind of binary thinking is absolutely a form of perfectionism. i don't think of myself as an unreasonable perfectionist, except that i am and it takes the form of that exact construct.

a question: WHAT IS AN AWESOME THING YOU WANT TO DO IN YOUR LJ THAT YOU HAVEN'T BECAUSE YOU THINK IT'S NARCISSISTIC?

[kjc]

the narcissism is when you have expectations about how other people will react.

What about hopes for how other people will react? There's a part of me that's constantly yelling "TELL ME THAT YOU LIKE ME!" and I spend a lot of time muffling it.

WHAT IS AN AWESOME THING YOU WANT TO DO IN YOUR LJ THAT YOU HAVEN'T BECAUSE YOU THINK IT'S NARCISSISTIC?

Hmm. I can't think of any awesome things. But things I've resisted doing are those that essential ask "what do you think of me?" because I have difficulty perceiving myself and no real feeling for how I present myself to the world.

[rmd]

i think everyone has some of that. we're social animals -- praise from fellow pack members is kind of a hardwired need.

tell you what: go wild with it and if i, the arbiter of all things, think you're being too "ENOUGH ABOUT ME LETS TALK ABOUT YOU - WHAT DO YOU THINK OF ME?" i will let you know.

it's a really high bar, tho.

if you want to, you should totally do a "what do you think of me, anonymous comments enabled". if you're nervous about what people might say, have all the comments screened and only unscreen the ones you like. :-)

[metagnat]

Tell me a story about your life. Everytime we talk, I find out cool things about you, but I wish I knew you better.

Please, tell me a true story. (I know it's not really a question, but hey...)

-E

[kjc]

You're a very sweet woman, you know that?

I wrote down a true story for you here: http://kjc007.livejournal.com/159212.html

[i_leonardo]

"narcissism" killed Narcissus, so - yeah: not a healthy thing. it implies a degree of self-absorption so extreme that nothing else can really penetrate it.

but keeping a journal that other people read ? that's the modern equivalent of hanging out at the pub after work and catching up with yer mates.

[kjc]

but keeping a journal that other people read ? that's the modern equivalent of hanging out at the pub after work and catching up with yer mates.

Yes, but... in a conversation, there's give and take. A public journal is more like a monologue.

I'm just trying to figure out how to communicate AND occasionally get some ego-boo without descending into asshole territory.