I've started looking at all the money I have. In my checking account, in my CD, and in bonds that I've had since I was little. I want to know exactly how much I have. When I start my new job next week, all I'm going to be doing is saving my money. I need to start saving because pretty soon I'm going to get away. The feeling is urgent. More and more ( Read more... )

i don't know how much longer i can do this. i hate this feeling and although i act as if it doesn't bother me, it does. and you know it does. and that's what makes it worse. so i'll smile for a little while longer, but i'm growing tired and my patience is growing thin.

i've been thinking about this for about a week now, but today more than ever it's been eating away at me.

i want to go to ASU next semester. i already have the acceptance, the only thing that has been holding me back for the past year is that i'd miss everyone way too much. i still will miss everyone, but like.. it's not the same. lately i've been ( Read more... )

i'm happy. i've met some amazing people this summer, and i'm very grateful for it. i don't think this summer has been wasted, which is always a good thing. it's the end of summer, however.. this past week has been a lot of fun and the next two should be pretty dope, too. i'm hoping ( Read more... )

small update ( Read more... )

i've been in a much better mood, lately. i'm out of my funk, and i'm glad for it. i've figured out that what i want and what i need will probably never match, and i'm just going to let things work out instead of worrying about it. i'm not going to go out of my way anymore and i'm not going to put myself out there again. i did my part - whatever ( Read more... )

went to the mets game on tuesday with jason and marlinski... what a ridiiiiculous game. 12 innings. two balks in an inning. mets took the win. so much fun. i hadn't been to a game in sooo long, and i'm really glad i went with them. i love those two.<3

yesterday was feliks' surprise party. it went so well, everyone had a blast. feliks most ( Read more... )

i went to a nude beach today with kelly. haha.

and let me tell you....... awkward. i don't plan on going again any time soon, thank you. as much as i'm all about not wearing clothes, i'm not about 40 year old fat men flopping around all over the place.

this week has been dope.

saturday was the party at 52 handy. all i can say is ridiculous. i ended up not going home at all. only got an hour and a half for sleep that night... i love when they do big things.

sunday was nicole's 21st birthday. i love that so many people showed up. <3 it's good to have everyone home. i'm sure she doesn't remember ( Read more... )

i haven't slept in my own bed more than once in the past week. i haven't really slept much in the past week, for that matter. i'm exhausted - physically and emotionally. i don't know what it is i want anymore, or what it is i'm doing. i have this nagging, lingering feeling that i'm going to get myself into trouble..

i've been a bad bad girl.
i' ( Read more... )