Stress is the mind killer

[kirian]

Terrible, terrible day today confidence wise. I have a terrible sense of impending doom. Real anxiety. There is a huge amount of work to do, but so much that I am starting to feel paralysed by it all

Comments

[bateleur]

Well to start with...

1) Your day job works like this you paid to turn up, work 09:00-17:00 (or whatever hours it is you do) and then you get to go home. If there's more work than fits neatly into that time period then either your employer gives some of it to someone else or some of it doesn't get done.

If your immediate reaction to this proposition is to declare your current work crisis to be some kind of exception to this rule or to explain why it's unacceptable that the work doesn't get done then that's the problem right there.

[kirian]

The other problem is having a pathological tendency to assume I am doing a terrible job, even when I'm not.
Grrrr, bad brain.

[undyingking]

It's a while since I had this sort of thing, thank goodness. But what I used to do was to get out, look at, and read through things I'd done in the past which were of excellent quality and / or suceeded brilliantly.

Of course, if you get very negative, it's possible to feel that there have been no such things. In this situation, documentary evidence - reviews, congratulatory emails, etc -- can be helpful.

[undyingking]

(PS did you get my message about Emma H/W? -- sent to your hotmail account, but then I had a doubt as to whether that was still active.)

[kirian]

Oooh yes, just checked. Funnily enough that is my main e-mail now after trying to juggle accounts between different computer just got Silly.

I will get in touch with her. Thanks for that!

[undyingking]

cool!

[lanfykins]

Do something. Anything. Complete the smallest task that is currently causing you stress, and then feel good about having completed something through the awful anxiety.

And in general: look at the next step on your climb, and ignore the bulk of Everest above you.

[floralaetifica]

Listen to lanfykins. She is wise.

[secondhand_rick]

What do you guys do when you get horrible bouts of anxiety and stress?

Bottle it up inside until the anxiety has to bust out, then drink a bottle of whisky?

[kirian]

If only I liked whisky, it's the only flaw in that statement!

[floralaetifica]

Here's my coping mode:

1. Accept that this is how it is right now. Fighting the anxiety just gives you one more fight to deal with. You will get through it - you've got through worse. You are mighty.
2. Be kind to yourself, both in your head and in the physical world. Watch your inner monologue carefully. Challenge any negative thoughts gently, as you would to a friend, whenever they arise. Make sure you eat, breathe, take breaks, and do at least one thing 'just for fun' each day (even if it doesn't feel like fun).
3. Put coping first. There is nothing more important than your mental health. Release yourself from all expectations about success or quality. Right now, it's enough that you're doing anything - be proud of each tiny thing you achieve. Even one thing per day is enough.
4. Take one step at a time, and don't look beyond it till it's finished. Prioritising counts as a step - it's ok to make a list and decide an order of importance - but once that's done, look only at one item at a time. Be very, very firm with yourself about

[kirian]

That's all good advice, and well user tested methinks.