Fic - Due South - "Through the Looking Glass" (4/4) - RayK/Fraser, RayK/human!Dief [mature]
Title:Through the Looking Glass
Author:tres_mechante
Fandom: Due South
Pairing/character: Ray Kowalski/Benton Fraser, Ray Kowalski/human!Diefenbaker
Rating: FRM (Mature)
Word Count: 30,850 approx.
Kink: magic/supernatural elements; first time; angst; flirtation; seduction; mind fuck
Notes/Warnings: magic; language; angst; character death(temporary!); animal-to-human transformation; vampire; male/male sex (not graphic); first times; violence; developing feelings; disturbing images (nightmares); crackishness
Thank you to the ficfinishing gang, who cheered me on to greater word counts.
Many thanks to cincoflex and vr_trakowski who encouraged me every step of the way.
Very special thanks to mizface, my First Reader, who read the story as it was being written (warts and all), offered thoughts, asked questions, gently pointed out the inconsistancies/errors, and encouraged me to keep going simply by asking “More please?”
Summary: Ray’s life has taken a turn for the strange, what with a gruesome murder, creepy witnesses, the woodland version of Hotel California, and a squirrel with attitude. But then along comes some guy claiming to be Diefenbaker and that's when things get weird.
Artist:sly_fuck Thank you for the art!
~~~~~~~~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part Four + Epilogue
Ray felt faint. It was a voice he hadn’t heard since That Day, a voice he believed he would never hear again.
The man walked a little closer, easing out of shadow and into the dim light. “Are you alright, Ray? You look a little pale.”
Ray’s world began to grey out. His mind knew this was impossible, but still kept chanting ‘Fraser, Fraser, oh, god, Fraser’. What came out of his mouth was a broken, “Ben?”
Fraser - no, Ben, because there was nothing buttoned down or formal about this guy, all loose-limbed and dressed in buckskin - Ben smiled and walked out of the shadows, until he was right up in Ray’s personal space.
“It’s good to see you again, Ray.”
“Ben?” Ray was pretty sure he was dreaming. Ben was dead. “You’re not real.”
“I’m right here, Ray. See?” He took Ray’s hand and placed it on his chest. “I’m real.”
Ray clutched the jacket fiercely with two fists. Panting harshly, Ray tried to catch his breath, but couldn’t seem to make his lungs work right. He skin felt as though it were on fire, like maybe he was going to burst into flame and burn down the whole damn forest.
“Shh. Easy, now, calm down or you’ll pass out,” murmured Ben softly.
Ray tried to focus on Ben. God, yes, Ben, not Fraser. Fraser was his friend, his buddy, but this was Ben, the lover in his dreams, in his heart.
“Ben,” Ray tried to say, but no sound came out.
Ben seemed to understand and slowly bent his head, bringing his lips a hairsbreadth from Ray’s, pausing for an eternity before lightly brushing against them.
Ray moaned as he eyes drifted closed. “Yes,” he gasped when fingers trailed over his cheek and across his lips, their coolness soothing the fire raging in his blood. Blessedly cool dry lips placed soft kisses at the corner of his lips, along his jaw and down his neck. Ray tilted his head back, exposing his throat to the sweet caresses.
Those teasing lips moved to his ear. “I missed you so much, Ray. You have no idea. Why did we wait? Oh, Ray, why didn’t you ever say anything sooner?”
Ray tried to focus enough to form words. “I didn’t know you felt the same - why didn’t you say anything? Jeez, all this time” he gasped at the sharp nip on his earlobe. “I was scared, Ben, so scared. You’re my best friend in the whole world. I couldn’t lose that.”
“Oh, Ray, you’ve lost nothing. I’m here now and I promise - I swear to you - we’ll have all the time in the world to make up for what we’ve missed.” Ben’s voice dipped even lower as he resumed kissing along Ray’s neck. “Eternity, Ray. Would you like that?”
“Oh yeah. Ben...” he gasped at the stinging nip placed just over his jugular. “Please...”
“Nooo!”
The yell from forest was a jolt, but not nearly as much as having Ben torn away from him. Ray struggled to surface from the mental fog he was in. He saw Ben sprawled on the ground, Dief kicking him and beating him with a branch.
“Dief stop! Stop it!”
Dief backed off and moved to Ray, not turning his back to Ben. Ray watched Ben sit up slowly and wipe the blood from his face and lick it off his fingers.
“Bad dog,” said Ben, eyes burning an unearthly red and mouth twisting and suddenly sporting fangs. “Someone needs to be taught manners.”
Images from forgotten nightmares swam in front of Ray’s eyes. It was official, he had gone mad.
An urgent tug on his arm and a whispered “dead thing” had him running for the cabin, chased by the enraged yelling of Ben - no, a monster, not Ben and not Fraser. Ray stumbled halfway across the yard and only stayed on his feet because Dief caught him.
The thing wearing Ben’s face came charging out of the woods after them, but suddenly tripped. Almost to the cabin, Dief and Ray glance back in time to see the ‘dead thing’ hit the ground. From what Ray could see, he seemed to be doing battle with something small tangling with his feet.
Dief used the distraction to haul Ray into the cabin and bolt the door. Ray’s mind was in a blank. He couldn’t seem to wrap his head around Ben, or whatever that was. His friend, his love, was a monster. And he’d been kissing it. Bile rose in the back of his throat.
“Drink,” said Dief, holding a cup of water to Ray’s lips.
Ray obediently drank. It helped a little, but the tremors wracking his body refused to stop.
A blanket was wrapped around him, and he was led to the stove. “Please, Ray. Just start the fire and you can rest. Get the fire going and I’ll look after you.” Guided by Dief, Ray reached out to the wood laid in the stove; a touch later, the wood was engulfed in flame.
Ray let himself be guided to the bed. He just let Dief do whatever he wanted; actual thought was beyond him for the moment. “That wasn’t Ben.”
“No,” agreed Dief softly. “Tilt your head a bit.”
A wet cloth dabbed at his neck. Ray was shocked to see blood on the cloth. He swallowed hard. “He bit me. Fraser’s a...a...”
“Wapierz - vampire, yes, it appears that way.”
Ray looked at Dief in panic. “He bit me. Does that mean I’m going to be one, too?”
Dief hesitated. “No. No, Ray, of course not. Otherwise you’d be a wolf now,” he said, shifting his fingers to press against the bite on Ray’s shoulder.
Ray relaxed a bit. “Yeah, well, it’s not a full moon yet.”
Once Ray’s neck was cleaned, Dief curled around Ray, rocking them both as he whispered words of comfort. Both men flinched when something hit the side of the cabin.
“Damn you, Diefenbaker! You had no right to interfere. He’s mine! Do you hear me - mine!” The enraged voice came from the other side of the door. Silence followed the tirade.
Just when Ray began to hope he - it - had gone, the voice came again, but this time it pleaded and cajoled.
“Ray? Can you hear me? I won’t hurt you. I’d never hurt you - you’re the other half of me.” Silence. “Haven’t I been taking good care of you? I taught you skills for survival - you remembered the stories, right? You used them to help you.”
Ray leaned into Dief’s embrace. Yeah, he’d remembered the stories; they’d helped him figure out how to live day by day.
“You have such a gentle heart, Ray. Under all that toughness, your loving heart called to me. Even when your survival demanded it, you couldn’t kill the innocent. I did that for you, Ray. I hunted and prepared food for you, food you accepted and enjoyed.”
Ray fidgeted and whispered to Dief. “What if he breaks in?”
“Not happening,” Dief whispered back, sounding reassuringly confident.
“How can you be sure? I mean, the garlic will only do so much.”
“Ray? Ray, talk to me, please?” came the plaintive voice. “You know me - I take care of what’s mine. When it got colder I gave you boots. I made those boots myself, just for you. There’s even a jacket to go with them. Would you like that?”
Ray had to bite his lip to keep from calling out.
“The jacket is soft and warm and, if you want, I’ll even trim it in wolf.”
Ray and Dief both stiffened at the threat.
A shriek from outside raised the hair on Ray’s neck. Something heavy hit the door and then silence fell.
Huddled together, the two men waited, wondering what would happen next. Minutes passed, but nothing happened. Dief slowly let go of Ray and moved to the window. He peered outside, but then pulled back and shook his head. Ray nodded understanding and got up to help close the shutters.
“Well, that was...” Ray wasn’t quite sure how to describe recent events. “We have to leave.”
“We will, soon.”
Ray was afraid it wouldn’t be soon enough.
Although they weren’t hungry, eventually they forced themselves to eat. Being weak from hunger would be a fatal mistake. They settled into bed fully clothed; there would be no sleep that night.
Ray curled protectively around Dief, angry and scared at the threat against him. Dief and Fraser had been close, but the monster didn’t seem to care about that. All he - it - wanted was Ray.
Ray shivered, prompting Dief to press back against him. Neither man slept.
The dawn brought with it release from fear, at least temporarily. They untangled themselves and got up, hesitantly venturing outside, but feeling safe in the daylight.
The yard was a wreck. The woodpile had been scattered, and the bedding left out for airing the day before was in tatters.
They cleaned up the mess and, after a hasty breakfast, retraced the route to the magic door, checking for any place where they might be ambushed along the way. If they wanted to leave, there was no other choice except to run the path at night; waiting at the tree for the full moon to hit its peak was unthinkable.
On the way back to the cabin, they detoured to the clearing to collect the packages, which had been stuffed into satchels this time rather than baskets or bundles.
Back at the cabin, the two men worked quickly and efficiently to prepare for the night. Neither wanted to get caught outside when dusk fell.
Chores done, dinner eaten and the remains cleared away, they opened the satchels. Ray wasn’t sure what to make of the contents. “Huh.” Aside from foodstuffs, there were knives, amulets and both a cross and a crucifix. Ray held up the cross. “Thinking of converting?”
“It will ward off the vampire,” said Dief.
“Yeah, I figured. I’ve seen enough horror movies to get the idea.” He handed it to Dief. “Keep it close.”
They repacked the bags with what they thought might be needed once they went through the door. Between what they’d packed and what they’d hidden away, Ray and Dief would not be caught without basic supplies when they went through the door.
Now all they could do was wait.
Ray had no idea how long they’d been asleep - he didn’t even remember drifting off - but he was pretty sure a noise woke him. He listened, eyes trained on the door. Nothing. Just as he started to relax a clatter sounded on the roof.
Dief jolted awake and frantically looked around.
“Easy buddy,” soothed Ray, even as he eyed the ceiling suspiciously.
The door rattled. “Ray? I know you’re in there.”
Ray huddled against Dief and stayed silent.
“You really are being silly about this, Ray. I’m not going to hurt you. We’re going to be together forever, remember? It was so good to finally be able to touch you, hold you. In fact, you seemed to enjoy what we were doing, too - at least before that fucking dog got in the way.”
Ray flinched to hear those words. The voice was Fraser’s but the words were definitely not.
“I really should have left the stupid wolf where he was. I mean, seriously. A deaf wolf? Looking back, the best thing to do would have been to turn him loose and just let nature take its course - survival of the fittest.”
Ray turned and hugged Dief close. “That’s not Fraser,” whispered Ray.
“I know. I’m okay.”
Ray doubted that. He hugged Dief closer, pressing his head to his chest as if he could somehow block out the hateful words. As freaked as Ray was about the vampire’s obsession, he knew Dief had to be hurting to hear those awful words spoken in his long-time friend’s voice.
Eventually, the vampire got tired of taunting them and began throwing things at the cabin. The rhythm was unpredictable, calculated to unnerve the occupants. Ray reached under his pillow and pulled out the cross, holding it in one hand just in case.
When dawn came, they finally fell into a fitful sleep, only to rise at noon to finish their preparations.
“It’s tonight, right? Please tell me the door unlocks tonight.”
“Tonight. I can feel it,” said Dief. “I’m not sure how long we will have so we must be ready to go quickly.”
“Yeah. Nothing stopping us except the Fraser wanna-be. Any idea how we’re going to get past him? Somehow, I don’t think he wants me to go - especially not with you.”
Dief grimaced, an expression that reminded Ray of canine Dief eating dog food.
Out in the yard - which had once again been trashed - they tossed out the old water and filled the buckets with fresh, and gathered more firewood for cooking. That was when they found Rocky.
“Ray! Come quickly!”
Ray ran at Dief’s shout. He wasn’t sure what to expect, but it wasn’t the sight of Dief holding a small furry body.
“Ah Jeez,” groaned Ray. “Rocky.”
Dief hastened to reassure him. “He’s alive, but injured.”
“Better bring him in, then.”
First aid for squirrels was not something Ray had ever considered studying. Dief admitted his knowledge was more on catching and possibly eating them than in helping them. Trial and error, with a large dose of patience from Rocky, revealed that the squirrel was not badly hurt. However the shallow gouge on his side meant he probably wouldn’t be running any races anytime soon.
They settled him in a nest of blankets with some water and food and left him to rest.
Ray bit his lip in thought. “I’m guessing he’s what Fras- uh, that thing tripped over last night.”
“It would appear so. Rocky is very devoted to you.”
“Yeah, well, it’s been just him and me for a while.” Ray looked over at his tiny friend. “I’m glad he’ll be okay.”
Dief sidled up behind Ray and propped his chin on Ray’s shoulder.
Ray made a half-hearted attempt to dislodge him. “You know, buddy, you’ve got a really pointed chin.”
Dief shifted enough to nip at Ray’s chin. “Something we have in common, then.”
Ray glared at him. “You’ve got a smart mouth, too.”
Dief showed Ray what his smart mouth could do, kissing Ray senseless.
“Just so you know, I wasn’t actually complaining.”
The closer they got to nightfall, the higher the anxiety level in the cabin. Even at a run, it would take several minutes to reach the exit. Neither man doubted that the vampire would do everything in its power to stop them.
“What we need is a distraction,” said Ray, sipping his tea.
Dief looked intrigued. “What did you have in mind?”
Ray shrugged.
Rocky distracted them, scampering awkwardly across the floor and inspecting the small bundle of wood near the stove. He was moving slowly, but he was moving. Ray figured he’d be able to look after himself as long as he steered clear of monsters.
“You know, I’m going to miss that little guy,” he told Dief.
“Ray, where do you think the ambush will be?” asked Dief, a thoughtful look on his face.
Ray shrugged. They had pinpointed almost a dozen possible places when they went over the path. They had even considered the possibility that they would be attacked as soon as they left the safety of the cabin.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?” asked Ray.
“He can’t risk losing us. If we get away we could find help or seek refuge.”
“Do you think he’ll stop us at the door itself?”
“Yes, but the moon will not peak for a few hours. We have to get there before him.”
“Sure, and we have to keep him from coming after us,” said Ray. “I’m open to suggestion. What are you thinking?”
“You.”
“Me.”
“You.”
Ray was pretty sure his friend had lost his little wolf mind.
“Don’t look at me like that, Ray. We have to work fast if we want him away from that tree.” Dief got up and pulled a knife from one of the satchels.
Ray backed away when Dief approached. “Whoa! What’re you doing?”
“Do you trust me, Ray?”
“That’s a hell of a question. Of course I trust you,” he said, eyeing the knife warily.
“The vampire is like an animal. The senses are strong - like smell.”
“So...”
Dief grabbed Ray’s hand and made a shallow cut on the palm. Ray flinched but did not pull away. Dief took one of Ray’s dirty shirts - the one he’d used to clean up with after an earlier round of ‘thank god we’re still alive’ sex - and used part of it to wipe away the blood.
After bandaging Ray’s hand with a clean strip of cloth, Dief picked up Rocky and handed him to Ray.
“What the hell are you doing?”
“A distraction,” he said, tearing a strip off the soiled cloth and fastening it around Rocky. “This smells like you, so he will follow.”
“You seem awfully sure about that.”
“I am. He wants you; he will follow.”
Ray grimaced. “That’s just creepy. Hey, what about Rocky? That thing finds out it’s a trick, he’ll take it out on this little guy.”
“Ray, he is a squirrel. Even if he can’t run fast, he can still get into places no one can follow.” Dief laid a hand on Ray’s shoulder. “He will be fine.”
Ray looked down at Rocky squirming in his lap. “Yeah. Okay. Let’s do it.” He lifted the squirrel until they were eye to eye. “You be careful. If you end up dead I will not be a happy camper. Got it?”
Rocky squirmed even more and tried to jump down.
“It has to be now, Ray, before it’s dark enough for Be-the vampire to move freely.”
They went to the door, opened it and set Rocky down. Rocky’s tail flicked a few times and he scratched a bit at the strip of fabric. Without warning, Rocky darted out the door, into the woods and was gone.
Ray stared forlornly along the path Rocky had gone. When Dief slid an arm around his waist, Ray sighed heavily. “What now?”
“Now we leave. Make sure you have everything.”
While Ray double checked they had what they needed, he watched Dief make piles of blankets and kindling with candle stubs nestled in them. “Come light the candles, Ray, and then we can go.”
With no more than a quizzical look at his friend, Ray obediently lit the tiny candle stubs. It only took a moment to realize that, the way everything was arranged, the kindling and blankets would sooner or later catch fire. He looked around the cabin. The wooden structure would probably go up quickly as well.
Ray looked at Dief with new respect. Wolves were tricky and seemed to know the damnedest things.
Shadows crept over the path as they ran for the magical door and freedom.
Reaching the door was almost anticlimactic. They hid themselves as best they could and waited for the door to be revealed. Moonlight gradually reached past the treetops, slowly illuminating their surroundings.
An inhuman screech split the night, raising the hair on Ray’s neck. Dief’s sudden stillness reminded him of the time Dief - the wolf, Dief - hunted a perp in one of the old warehouses on the lakeshore. Dief had gone still like this, eyes focused and ears pricked forward. When he suddenly sprang into action, the bastard never stood a chance. He’d been found, taken down and dragged out where he and Fraser could arrest him.
Another scream sounded and the woods went silent, as if everything in it was hiding.
Ray’s attention was suddenly caught by a glow on the tree in front of them. The shape of a door was taking form. Jeez, this was really happening.
Dief nudged Ray and pointed behind them. Over the treetops an orange glow could be seen. The cabin had caught fire. He hoped it kept the vampire distracted long enough for them to get away.
Ray jumped at the sudden “Ray!” shouted from the woods. “I’m not letting you leave me. Do you hear me? You are mine - mine!”
Dief broke cover and went to the half-formed door. He grabbed a branch and thrust it into the opening and pulled it back. The branch was intact, so he motioned Ray to join him. “It’ll be a tight fit, but we can’t wait.”
Ray was about to ask who should go first when Dief grabbed him and stuffed him through the portal. Ray almost got stuck, but finally fell out the other side. Before he could pick himself up off the ground, Dief stumbled through and fell on top of him. They scrambled to their feet intent on finding safety but when they turned, they were confronted by villagers with torches.
“Oh, shit,” muttered Ray.
Dief, however, called to someone who stepped forward. They began speaking a language Ray did not understand. As the words flowed, he realized it was a form of Polish, not unlike the dialect his grandmother spoke. Ray wished he’d bothered to learn it.
When Dief put himself between Ray and the villagers, Ray began to get even more nervous. He understood two words: ‘zly’ which he was pretty sure meant bad, and wila, the fairy thing.
“Nie,” said Dief repeatedly. He talked more, gesturing back to the door, which was now fully formed. Ray heard the word wapierz, which seemed to get quite a reaction.
“Dief, what’s going on?”
“I’m trying to tell them you are not evil and that a vampire is coming.” Dief’s look was one of frustration. “They don’t want to help - they are afraid.”
Ray suddenly remembered something his grandmother taught him, insisted he learn if he learned nothing else. Stepping from behind Dief, Ray held out his hand in a gesture of supplication and, in badly spoken Polish said, “Prosze.” Please.
The low murmuring of the villagers almost drowned out the sound of unearthly screeching. Everyone turned to the doorway as it shimmered. Something was coming through.
Ray never hesitated. He grabbed the nearest torch and thrust it through the opening. The pained howl became a single word. “Ray!”
Dief grabbed Ray and pulled him away. Ray’s actions, however, inspired the villagers and they began poking their torches into the portal, which seemed to be getting smaller. He looked up. The moon had moved and clouds were rolling across the sky.
A woman’s voice caught Dief’s attention. “Roza!” He went to her, hugging the tiny old woman. He then turned to the young man, almost a kid, beside her and engulfed him in a hug as well. “Szymon.”
Taking her hand, he brought Roza to Ray and made introductions and, what may have been explanations. A couple of men from the mob - well, that’s what they looked like carrying torches like that - came over and joined the conversation. They cast a few glances at Ray but otherwise ignored him.
Ray didn’t like feeling left out, but he didn’t want to interrupt, especially if it could get them some help. Finally, Dief nodded and turned to Ray.
“We must hurry. The same power that made this door is making another one. It’s near where I was found. They say someone comes through every so often - usually they die before they are found. The last time the door opened there was a lightning storm that lasted two days. They don’t know where it leads. No one has gone through from here. Karol, the healer, he says it might take us back. Or maybe kill us. But--”
“But we have to try.” Ray looked at the tree engulfed in flames and felt his eyes burn. He’d be going back to a world where Benton Fraser was dead and buried. How many times did he have to lose him?
“Ray?”
Looking at the small group around them, he tried his best to ask where they had to go. “Gdzie?” he asked in halting Polish. When - if - he made it home, he was going to enrol in Polish classes. However, his halting attempt to speak the language was met with favour and they were escorted along an overgrown path up a hill.
They rounded a blind curve and came face to face with a glowing door. The tree itself appeared to be growing out of the rock wall behind it. The door in the trunk shimmered but was fading away.
Ray’s eyes met Dief’s and he knew what they had to do. With a hasty goodbye to Dief’s foster family, they joined hands and faced the door. Wishing with everything in him that things had been different for all of them, they stepped forward.
Ray stopped suddenly, and pulled Dief to face him. Raising a hand to his friend’s neck, Ray leaned in to rest his forehead against Dief’s.
“No regrets,” he whispered desperately. “No matter what happens, I have no regrets. You are my friend and my lover and I love you. You got me?”
Dief shifted until he could press his lips to Ray’s, ignoring the shuffling and murmuring of their audience. “No regrets, Ray. You are my heart as well. Pack mates, no matter what.”
“No matter what,” vowed Ray. He squeezed Dief’s hand and stepped through the door - and face first into a brick wall.
“The hell?” Ray barely stumbled back before Dief crashed into him, pushing him against the wall once more. When they turned around, the door was gone.
Ray and Dief were in a dimly passageway of some kind. However, instead of torches, there were a few bare bulbs hanging from the ceiling. They made their way along the corridor until they found a covered opening in the wall.
Dief touched the covering and whispered to Ray, “Not solid.”
Ray listened, but couldn’t hear anything on the other side, so he pushed against the fabric. It tore open along the edges, allowing Dief and Ray to step into a room; a room that lived on in his nightmares.
They were in the house of the crazy sisters.
Voices from down the hall cause a momentary panic. Dief rushed to the opening they’d come through and began patting the fabric back in place. Ray could now see that it was a painting. Once the edges had been tucked back into the frame - it looked crappy, but would probably not draw immediate attention - Ray and Dief looked for a place to hide.
They ended up crouched behind a rather large sofa, although it proved unnecessary as the voices simply moved past the room.
Tentatively they stood up and looked around. As far as Ray could tell, the place hadn’t changed at all in the months since he’d last seen it. He glanced at the picture they’d broken through. That explained where the guy with the axe had come from. Ray couldn’t help but look down where he’d last seen Fraser. No blood. The old biddies probably had some kind of super rug cleaner that took out blood stains.
He started to ask whether Dief wanted to explore a bit more or slip out and try to contact someone, but got distracted by movement outside. Ray stepped closer to the window and wished he had his glasses. In the distance a car was approaching along the private road. As it got closer, the hair on Ray’s neck stood up.
“Dief? You might want to see this.”
Dief hurried over in time to see the car cruise to a stop. “That...Ray that’s impossible.”
“Says the human wolf,” scoffed Ray. “This is bad, buddy. This is very...oh god...”
Ray grabbed Dief for support as they watched Fraser - their Ben - get out of the Goat. To see him so alive was almost more than he could take in. So much so he almost missed seeing himself and Dief get out of the car as well.
Dief muttered a quiet but emphatic, “Oh, shit.”
It was an indicator of how shaken he was that Ray didn’t even think about teasing him for swearing. Watching the argument unfolding by the car, Ray had an epiphany. “Ben doesn’t have to die.”
Dief’s head whipped around. “What?”
“We know what’s going to happen, Dief. We can stop it,” whispered Ray frantically.
“He doesn’t have to die... But how? We can’t just go out there and warn them.”
Ray considered the options even as he watched the argument taking place. There wasn’t much time left. He hurried over to room’s door and started looking around. “Hurry. One of those vultures had a bat or something that she hit you with.”
Dief rubbed the back of his head and came over to help search. He pulled a baseball bat from behind a sideboard table and held it out to Ray, who went to hide it behind the sofa.
Ray just hoped it would be enough to change events. A flash of red outside caught his eye. Fraser was marching up the path to the door. They were out of time.
“Ray.” Dief’s urgent whisper brought his attention back to the room. “There was someone back there. That’s what I sensed before.” Dief stood in front of the painting that hid the secret passage.
Ray didn’t hesitate. “Right. New plan.” He hefted the bat and joined Dief at the painting. “We wait for the bastard that killed Ben and make sure he doesn’t get another chance.”
Dief’s smile was feral.
They were once again behind the painting - which was really a door when they looked closely at the frame - when the door bell chimed. Dimly, they heard the murmur of voices at the door and then the shrill call of “Sister! Do hurry, we have visitors. The police are here. Put on the special tea for them.”
Securely hidden from sight, the two men slid down the wall to sit of the floor; they had no idea what would happen next. A strange sound caught Ray’s attention. He looked both ways along the passage trying to figure out where it was coming from.
Dief shot a questioning look at Ray when he suddenly stood up. Ray shushed him before Dief could say anything. He pointed down the corridor to their left and made a chopping motion. Dief nodded and stood with him. Ray hefted the bat while Dief pulled out a knife.
They approached the turn in the corridor where Ray flattened himself against the wall, Dief at his side. As the heavy footsteps came closer, Ray raised the bat and when the man appeared around the corner, he swung - not for the head, but to the knees. With a howl, the man went down, losing his grip on the axe as he hit the floor.
Ray was shocked, and possibly disappointed, to see that the monster of his nightmares was an old man, probably in his mid seventies. He glared up at Ray, madness burning bright in his eyes.
Shouting from the doorway drew Ray’s attention. From what he could make out, the howl had definitely been heard. He turned back to warn Dief but could only stare at the sight before him.
Dief knelt over the man, whose throat had been cut ear to ear. Ray raised his eyes to Dief’s and was transfixed by the way the golden brown eyes seemed to glow in the dim light of the passageway.
Dief shrugged. “Protect the pack, always. Threats must be removed.” He stood and wiped the blade on his pants.
Never had Ray been more aware of the fact that the man he had welcomed into his bed and his heart was, in fact, not human.
The distant sound of sirens and shouting distracted Ray. Without thinking, he dropped the bad and held his hand out to Dief. “We can’t be found. Come on, let’s go.” He was relieved when Dief took his hand and allowed himself to be led past the body and deeper into the hidden passages.
When they could no longer hear the commotion behind them, they paused trying to decide where to go. A sudden sharp pain in his chest drove Ray to his knees. Dief fell with him, trying to cushion his fall.
Ray tried to reassure Dief. “It’s okay, just a twinge,” he gasped. Dief did not look convinced, but the pain was easing. “I’m okay. I-I think this is supposed to happen.”
“Is this...is this the end? Are we going to die now?”
Ray shrugged even as he pulled Dief closer. “I’m not sure. Think about it, Dief. There can’t be two of me or two of you, even if one of you is human.” He took a deep breath, easing the constriction in his chest a little more. “We did it, buddy, we changed things. Ben is alive - alive! That’s what’s important, right?”
“Protect the pack, always,” whispered Dief, slouching down to rest his head of Ray’s heart for what they both knew would be the last time.
“Always,” echoed Ray. He lifted Dief’s head and kissed him gently. “I’ve got no regrets, Diefenbaker. None. I loved Benton Fraser, but that never had a chance to grow. And I love you; I just wish we had more time. Do you understand me? This is worth everything.”
Dief’s eyes glistened, and a tear slowly trailed down his cheek. “No regrets,” he whispered, returning Ray’s kiss.
“No regrets,” whispered Ray as the world seemed to fall away, leaving him to float somewhere outside himself. “No regrets.”
“Ray? Did you say something?”
Ray frowned. At least, he thought he did. It was hard to tell when all his body parts seemed disconnected from each other. “Hmm?”
“Open your eyes, Ray. Can you do that for me? Please? Ray, open your eyes.”
Ray wondered what had Fraser is such a panic. He sounded very un-Mountie-like talking like that. Wait, he was supposed to do something...eyes. Oh, yeah, open his eyes. He could do that.
The light stabbed through is head. “Too bright” he mumbled, snapping his eyes closed again. “Hurts.”
He heard something click. “Sorry, sorry. Try it now.”
It wasn’t so bad this time. He smiled up into worried blue eyes. “Hey.”
Fraser smiled back. “Hey,” he said, reaching past Ray for something.
Ray turned his head gingerly and watched Fraser push the call button. Oh. He was in the hospital. What the hell happened this time? When he tried to ask, however, he choked on the dryness of his throat.
Fraser, who was obviously some kind of angel, fed him ice chips until he could form words. However, Fraser cut in before Ray could ask what happened.
“Do you know who you are? What’s your name?”
Was this guy for real? “I’m a Polish fairy an’ m’name’s Tinkerbelle.” The expression on Fraser’s face had him choking on laughter. “Relax, Frase. First name Ray, last name Kowalski, or Vecchio; depends who you ask. Satisfied?”
“Not until you are out of here,” said Fraser. “Ray, I--”
The door suddenly opened and a doctor entered, trailed by a nurse. “And how are we feeling? It’s about time you woke up?”
“Feel kinda floaty,” mumbled Ray, thinking that under other circumstances it might not be a bad feeling.
“That’s the sedative. We’ll see about weaning you off it if everything checks out,” said the doctor. He turned to Fraser. “If you will excuse us, we’ll just examine him. Perhaps you could step outside?”
Fraser obviously didn’t want to go.
“S’okay. He can stay,” said Ray, wishing he could convince his mouth to work better.
“Thank you, kindly, Ray. If you’re sure...?”
Ray focused on Fraser, ignoring the doctor who was giving the nurse instructions about something. “Stay on one condition.”
“Anything.”
“Tell me why I’m tied to the bed?”
“Well, uh, you see... Doctor, perhaps I should leave you to it. Ray, you’re in good hands. I’ll just go let Lt. Welsh know you’re awake.”
“Coward,” muttered Ray as Fraser all but ran out the door.
Fighting back a yawn, Ray tried to glare at the doctor. “Doc? Wanna tell me what’s going on?” He tugged on the restraint. “How about getting rid of these?”
“Let’s see how you’re doing first,” said the doctor.
Ray bore the exam with ill grace. He hated hospitals. By the time the doctor was satisfied and removed the restraints, Ray was almost asleep again.
The next time Ray opened his eyes, Fraser was asleep in the chair beside his bed. Ray didn’t like the dark circles under his eyes, and wondered again what had happened. Ray shifted more comfortably, pleased that he felt like his body was his own again. Once he’d settled, he watched Fraser sleep.
When Fraser’s eyes flickered open, Ray smiled, inexplicably feeling as though he’d just been given a rare gift.
After savouring his second cup of coffee, Ray settled back in his chair and gave Fraser his best interrogation look.
Fraser just smiled benignly. Bastard.
“Okay, give - and don’t spare the details. Why have I been doped up and tied to a bed? How long have I been here? What the hell happened? And while we’re at it, where’s the wolf?”
When Fraser did that eyebrow scratch thing, Ray knew he wasn’t going to like any of the answers.
Finally, Fraser asked, “What is the last thing you remember?”
“For the hundred millionth time, nothing! Jeez. Okay, uh, we were in the house with the vulture sisters. There was a god awful howl from behind the walls and next thing I know someone clocks me and it started snowing, then everything went black.”
“One of the sisters hit you with a jar, which broke, and the powder billowed out. You were covered with a chemical - a rather powerful hallucinogen, actually. When you woke up in the ambulance you started yelling about vampires and monsters and, uh, you became quite agitated by my presence. The driver had to stop so I could get out. It was the only way to calm you down.”
Fraser’s matter-of-fact tone of voice contradicted the hurt in his eyes. Ray felt like he’d kicked a puppy, even if he didn’t mean to.
“You’ve been heavily sedated for the past three days while the effects of the chemicals wore off.” Fraser smiled reassuringly. “The doctors believe there will be no lasting effects.”
“Good. That’s good.” Ray nodded, more to himself than Fraser. Ray suddenly gave Fraser a sharp look. “You haven’t told me about Dief? My buddy’s okay, right?”
“Oh yes, he’s fine now.” At Ray’s glare, Fraser clarified, “He, well, apparently he inhaled some of the chemicals as well. He had to be restrained to get him to the vet. Diefenbaker kept trying to attack me. I can’t imagine what was going through his mind.”
“Maybe he was so strung out he thought you were a moose or something.”
“Very funny, Ray.” However, Fraser grinned a little even as he chastised Ray.
The doctor’s arrival cut short their visit. Fraser headed out to attend to consulate business and promised to return that evening.
Ray called after him, “Bring decent food!”
~~~ ~ ~~~
While Ray was relieved to be home again, the nightmares were something he could have done without. Thankfully he was on medical leave for another week so the whole perpetually exhausted thing wasn’t an issue.
Every night since he’d been released, Ray had woken up just before dawn - usually screaming. It had been so bad one night that a couple of neighbours had called the police to report a murder. That had not been one of his better nights, never mind the embarrassment of have uniforms politely asking to look around. Sheesh.
The images in his dreams were so real, he finally sought help, but not one of the departmental shrinks, because he didn’t want to risk anything going in his file. Well, Vecchio’s file, but still.
The therapist he finally chose lived just outside the city and specialized in dream interpretation and past life regression - whatever that was. But the guy didn’t judge and didn’t mind if Ray used a fake name. The reputation of Ray Kowalski - and Ray Vecchio - was safe; Bruce Wayne, however, was another matter. That guy had issues on top of issues anyway; he wouldn’t notice a few more.
The considered opinion of the therapist was that the dreams actually memories from a past life. Ray just nodded his head while the guy talked, but privately wondered how that was possible. How could a past life happen in the present time? As far as he knew, past lives were just that, in the past. Like maybe a hundred years ago. All the same, he appreciated having someone to talk to about this.
By the time Ray’s leave of absence ended, he was more or less himself again. There had been a few visits with Fraser and Dief, but they’d been brief; Fraser kept looking at both Ray and Dief like they were going to flip again, and Dief just seemed depressed around Ray. Ray kind of felt the same way around Dief.
If the past-life guy was to be believed, then Ray and a human version of Dief had been together, and a part of Ray felt a little like grieving for a relationship that probably never happened. Of course, apparently, Fraser had been a vampire with the hots for Ray, so he tended to take all that past life stuff with a box of salt. Although, the idea of Frase being hot for him, that was a good thing.
Watching Dief mope around, however, Ray had to wonder if maybe Dief was remembering something, too.
The knock at his door startled Ray from his musings. Past-life crap aside, the sessions helped him in another way. Before all this happened, Ray felt pretty sure he and Fraser were heading to something more than friendship. Needing to move on one way or the other, he’d invited Fraser & Dief over for dinner. Tonight they were going to have The Talk.
God help them both.
Ray opened the door with a grin. “Hey guys, come on in.” Fraser seemed a bit twitchy, but Dief trotted in, licking Ray’s hand as he went by.
“You okay, Ben?” asked Ray, making the distinction between his buddy Fraser and the guy he hoped would be more than a friend. He hoped Ben understood what he was doing.
Steeling himself, Fraser handed over a file folder. Inside was the report from the incident at the house. Ray glanced over the arrest and interrogation of the sisters, who had been caring for their criminally insane brother. The brother, who had a history of animal torture had escaped from an asylum decades earlier and been hidden in the house. He had been found in a secret passage with his throat cut. No weapon was ever found. No witnesses, no evidence except for a baseball bat with smudged prints that were a possible match for...
“Well, shit - pardon my French. That’s not possible.” He looked up at Fraser. “How could my prints be on the bat?”
“How indeed,” murmured Fraser. “There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”
“Hamlet.” Ray grinned at Ben’s look of surprise. “Don’t look so shocked. Just because I mix up words when my brain goes too fast, doesn’t mean I’m stupid. Stupid people don’t make detective.”
“I never thought you to be anything less than highly intelligent. But, in all fairness, you never struck me as the Shakespeare type, either.”
“Yeah, well I’m just full of surprises,” retorted Ray. He held up the folder. “So, what about this?”
“If you look a little further you will see the fingerprints have been discounted. While there were similarities to yours, no one believes it is even remotely possible that they’re actually yours. The case remains, officially, unsolved, although the dead man is the likely suspect for the other murders.”
“And the sisters?”
“That’s up to the courts to decide.” Fraser hesitated a moment. “For what it’s worth, one, or possibly both of the sisters sent the information to the chief of police. How they managed to get access to the photos and reports is still being investigated.”
Ray leaned back in a comfortable sprawl. “That concludes the official portion of this evening’s agenda,” he said, and pointed to the chair. “Sit.”
When Fraser - Ben - hesitated, Ray put a little more force in his voice. “Now.”
Ben sat. Ray was pretty sure Dief was laughing, but since the wolf was going over to curl up in the corner, he didn’t comment on it.
“We have to talk, Ben.” Ray was ridiculously pleased when Ben refrained from playing dumb. “Look, we both know things have been changing between us. It’s been going on for a long time, but it’s really been noticeable since you went away.”
Ben leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “I missed you so much while I was gone,” he said. “That’s why I called every day. It felt wrong to be so far away from you. Even being home wasn’t. Home, I mean.”
Ray edged forward as well. “So, the question is, what are we going to do about it?”
“The possibilities are endless,” said Ben, sounding a little breathless.
“Oh yeah,” agreed Ray, sliding to his knees and moving in front of Ben, who obligingly spread his knees to allow him closer. “This has been a long time coming.”
“Too long,” whispered Ben. “Much too long.” Hesitantly, he lowered his head and lightly brushed his lips against Ray’s.
Ray felt as though he was about to go up in flames. The heat in his blood built with every brush of their lips. When Ben drew back and tenderly ran the back of his fingers over Ray’s cheek, it only added to the fire.
Ray reached up and wrapped a hand around the back of Ben’s neck and pulled him into another kiss. Minutes, or maybe hours, later they pulled apart, breathless and dazed and smiling.
Ben’s eyes darkened the longer he stared at Ray.
Ray fidgeted. “What?”
“You are a very good kisser,” he said.
“You’re not so bad yourself.”
“I want to do more than kiss.”
“I’m glad to hear it.”
Ben cleared his throat. And then did it again. “Ray, I hesitate to ask, that is, it is prudent, um, what I’m trying to say, that is ask, is-”
Ray lowered his head, trying to smother his grin. He looked up and said very seriously, “Yes, I’ve done it with a guy before. Yes, I’m clean. No, I don’t want to use a condom unless you want to - or need to. No, this isn’t just a one-night thing.”
Ben grinned one of his shy grins. “I’m glad one of us knows what they’re doing,” he said, looking a bit embarrassed. “Ray, I...well, I...”
Ray pressed his lips to Ben’s, silencing him. “I love you, too.”
Those were the last coherent words for quite some time.
~~~~~~~~~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~
--- EPILOGUE ---
The sunlight was weak, but it was enough to rouse Ray from sleep. This was the last day at the cabin before returning to Chicago.
As Christmas gift to Ben, Ray had rented a small cabin in Minnesota. It was isolated, but not so primitive that they had to do without indoor plumbing. In fact, they had even made good use of the hot tub on the deck every night. There was something magical about soaking in the bubbling hot water while stars sparkled above and snow covered everything as far as the eye could see.
Best of all, however, had been Ben’s surprise at Ray’s comfort so far from city amenities. And Ben was always so very appreciative of Ray’s surprises.
Ray stretched contentedly, jostling his bedmate in the process. He smiled indulgently at the sleepy grumble. “Sorry, babe,” he whispered. “Go back to sleep. It’s still early.”
Ray turned his head to check on his other bedmate. “You know you’re not supposed to be on the bed, right?” he whispered.
Dief lifted his head from Ray’s chest, yawned and put his head back down. Ray carded his fingers through the thick fur at the wolf’s neck. It was something they both enjoyed.
Ray was just drifting back to sleep when Dief stretched, almost rolling off the bed in the process, righting himself at the last moment.
“What a goof,” mumbled Ray.
“I love you, too, Ray.”
It took a moment for Ray to react. He lifted his head and stared at Dief. “Did you say something?”
Dief looked back innocently, yawned, and rested his head on Ray’s stomach, eyes fixed on Ray’s.
Definitely time to go back to the city, thought Ray. “Pfft, next thing you know I’ll be wandering through the woods talking to squirrels,” he muttered.
“Squirrels are noble and should be treated with respect.”
Ray sat up suddenly. “Holy crap!”
Ben opened bleary eyes. “What’s wrong?”
Ray answered before he could stop himself. “Dief’s talking!”
“What does he want now? And why is he on the bed?” Ben glared at Dief. “What did I tell you about sleeping on the bed?”
Dief groaned and rolled off the bed. “It’s not like I was here when you mated. Three times.”
Ray was pretty sure he was starting to hyperventilate.
“It’s not polite to pry into someone’s private business,” chided Ben.
Dief glared at him before padding to the door. “How could I ignore it?” he asked indignantly. “You were both loud enough to keep me awake all night - and I'm deaf!”
Ray could have sworn Dief winked at him before leaving the room. He turned to Ben, who had lain down again.
“I apologize for Diefenbaker,” said Ben, running his fingers along Ray's arm. “Sometimes he has no manners.”
Ray just laughed until his stomach ached. When he finally calmed down, Ben was looking at him with fond indulgence. “Welcome to my life,” he said. “I suppose when we get back I should introduce you to my father.”
“I thought he was dead.”
“Oh, he is," said Ben. "It doesn’t seem to slow him down any, though."
Ray just grinned. Past lives, human wolves, vampires, a back-talking mostly deaf wolf, and a loving Mountie in his bed. He couldn’t wait to see what came next.
---END And they lived happily ever after---
Author:tres_mechante
Fandom: Due South
Pairing/character: Ray Kowalski/Benton Fraser, Ray Kowalski/human!Diefenbaker
Rating: FRM (Mature)
Word Count: 30,850 approx.
Kink: magic/supernatural elements; first time; angst; flirtation; seduction; mind fuck
Notes/Warnings: magic; language; angst; character death(temporary!); animal-to-human transformation; vampire; male/male sex (not graphic); first times; violence; developing feelings; disturbing images (nightmares); crackishness
Thank you to the ficfinishing gang, who cheered me on to greater word counts.
Many thanks to cincoflex and vr_trakowski who encouraged me every step of the way.
Very special thanks to mizface, my First Reader, who read the story as it was being written (warts and all), offered thoughts, asked questions, gently pointed out the inconsistancies/errors, and encouraged me to keep going simply by asking “More please?”
Summary: Ray’s life has taken a turn for the strange, what with a gruesome murder, creepy witnesses, the woodland version of Hotel California, and a squirrel with attitude. But then along comes some guy claiming to be Diefenbaker and that's when things get weird.
Artist:sly_fuck Thank you for the art!
~~~~~~~~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part Four + Epilogue
Ray felt faint. It was a voice he hadn’t heard since That Day, a voice he believed he would never hear again.
The man walked a little closer, easing out of shadow and into the dim light. “Are you alright, Ray? You look a little pale.”
Ray’s world began to grey out. His mind knew this was impossible, but still kept chanting ‘Fraser, Fraser, oh, god, Fraser’. What came out of his mouth was a broken, “Ben?”
Fraser - no, Ben, because there was nothing buttoned down or formal about this guy, all loose-limbed and dressed in buckskin - Ben smiled and walked out of the shadows, until he was right up in Ray’s personal space.
“It’s good to see you again, Ray.”
“Ben?” Ray was pretty sure he was dreaming. Ben was dead. “You’re not real.”
“I’m right here, Ray. See?” He took Ray’s hand and placed it on his chest. “I’m real.”
Ray clutched the jacket fiercely with two fists. Panting harshly, Ray tried to catch his breath, but couldn’t seem to make his lungs work right. He skin felt as though it were on fire, like maybe he was going to burst into flame and burn down the whole damn forest.
“Shh. Easy, now, calm down or you’ll pass out,” murmured Ben softly.
Ray tried to focus on Ben. God, yes, Ben, not Fraser. Fraser was his friend, his buddy, but this was Ben, the lover in his dreams, in his heart.
“Ben,” Ray tried to say, but no sound came out.
Ben seemed to understand and slowly bent his head, bringing his lips a hairsbreadth from Ray’s, pausing for an eternity before lightly brushing against them.
Ray moaned as he eyes drifted closed. “Yes,” he gasped when fingers trailed over his cheek and across his lips, their coolness soothing the fire raging in his blood. Blessedly cool dry lips placed soft kisses at the corner of his lips, along his jaw and down his neck. Ray tilted his head back, exposing his throat to the sweet caresses.
Those teasing lips moved to his ear. “I missed you so much, Ray. You have no idea. Why did we wait? Oh, Ray, why didn’t you ever say anything sooner?”
Ray tried to focus enough to form words. “I didn’t know you felt the same - why didn’t you say anything? Jeez, all this time” he gasped at the sharp nip on his earlobe. “I was scared, Ben, so scared. You’re my best friend in the whole world. I couldn’t lose that.”
“Oh, Ray, you’ve lost nothing. I’m here now and I promise - I swear to you - we’ll have all the time in the world to make up for what we’ve missed.” Ben’s voice dipped even lower as he resumed kissing along Ray’s neck. “Eternity, Ray. Would you like that?”
“Oh yeah. Ben...” he gasped at the stinging nip placed just over his jugular. “Please...”
“Nooo!”
The yell from forest was a jolt, but not nearly as much as having Ben torn away from him. Ray struggled to surface from the mental fog he was in. He saw Ben sprawled on the ground, Dief kicking him and beating him with a branch.
“Dief stop! Stop it!”
Dief backed off and moved to Ray, not turning his back to Ben. Ray watched Ben sit up slowly and wipe the blood from his face and lick it off his fingers.
“Bad dog,” said Ben, eyes burning an unearthly red and mouth twisting and suddenly sporting fangs. “Someone needs to be taught manners.”
Images from forgotten nightmares swam in front of Ray’s eyes. It was official, he had gone mad.
An urgent tug on his arm and a whispered “dead thing” had him running for the cabin, chased by the enraged yelling of Ben - no, a monster, not Ben and not Fraser. Ray stumbled halfway across the yard and only stayed on his feet because Dief caught him.
The thing wearing Ben’s face came charging out of the woods after them, but suddenly tripped. Almost to the cabin, Dief and Ray glance back in time to see the ‘dead thing’ hit the ground. From what Ray could see, he seemed to be doing battle with something small tangling with his feet.
Dief used the distraction to haul Ray into the cabin and bolt the door. Ray’s mind was in a blank. He couldn’t seem to wrap his head around Ben, or whatever that was. His friend, his love, was a monster. And he’d been kissing it. Bile rose in the back of his throat.
“Drink,” said Dief, holding a cup of water to Ray’s lips.
Ray obediently drank. It helped a little, but the tremors wracking his body refused to stop.
A blanket was wrapped around him, and he was led to the stove. “Please, Ray. Just start the fire and you can rest. Get the fire going and I’ll look after you.” Guided by Dief, Ray reached out to the wood laid in the stove; a touch later, the wood was engulfed in flame.
Ray let himself be guided to the bed. He just let Dief do whatever he wanted; actual thought was beyond him for the moment. “That wasn’t Ben.”
“No,” agreed Dief softly. “Tilt your head a bit.”
A wet cloth dabbed at his neck. Ray was shocked to see blood on the cloth. He swallowed hard. “He bit me. Fraser’s a...a...”
“Wapierz - vampire, yes, it appears that way.”
Ray looked at Dief in panic. “He bit me. Does that mean I’m going to be one, too?”
Dief hesitated. “No. No, Ray, of course not. Otherwise you’d be a wolf now,” he said, shifting his fingers to press against the bite on Ray’s shoulder.
Ray relaxed a bit. “Yeah, well, it’s not a full moon yet.”
Once Ray’s neck was cleaned, Dief curled around Ray, rocking them both as he whispered words of comfort. Both men flinched when something hit the side of the cabin.
“Damn you, Diefenbaker! You had no right to interfere. He’s mine! Do you hear me - mine!” The enraged voice came from the other side of the door. Silence followed the tirade.
Just when Ray began to hope he - it - had gone, the voice came again, but this time it pleaded and cajoled.
“Ray? Can you hear me? I won’t hurt you. I’d never hurt you - you’re the other half of me.” Silence. “Haven’t I been taking good care of you? I taught you skills for survival - you remembered the stories, right? You used them to help you.”
Ray leaned into Dief’s embrace. Yeah, he’d remembered the stories; they’d helped him figure out how to live day by day.
“You have such a gentle heart, Ray. Under all that toughness, your loving heart called to me. Even when your survival demanded it, you couldn’t kill the innocent. I did that for you, Ray. I hunted and prepared food for you, food you accepted and enjoyed.”
Ray fidgeted and whispered to Dief. “What if he breaks in?”
“Not happening,” Dief whispered back, sounding reassuringly confident.
“How can you be sure? I mean, the garlic will only do so much.”
“Ray? Ray, talk to me, please?” came the plaintive voice. “You know me - I take care of what’s mine. When it got colder I gave you boots. I made those boots myself, just for you. There’s even a jacket to go with them. Would you like that?”
Ray had to bite his lip to keep from calling out.
“The jacket is soft and warm and, if you want, I’ll even trim it in wolf.”
Ray and Dief both stiffened at the threat.
A shriek from outside raised the hair on Ray’s neck. Something heavy hit the door and then silence fell.
Huddled together, the two men waited, wondering what would happen next. Minutes passed, but nothing happened. Dief slowly let go of Ray and moved to the window. He peered outside, but then pulled back and shook his head. Ray nodded understanding and got up to help close the shutters.
“Well, that was...” Ray wasn’t quite sure how to describe recent events. “We have to leave.”
“We will, soon.”
Ray was afraid it wouldn’t be soon enough.
Although they weren’t hungry, eventually they forced themselves to eat. Being weak from hunger would be a fatal mistake. They settled into bed fully clothed; there would be no sleep that night.
Ray curled protectively around Dief, angry and scared at the threat against him. Dief and Fraser had been close, but the monster didn’t seem to care about that. All he - it - wanted was Ray.
Ray shivered, prompting Dief to press back against him. Neither man slept.
The dawn brought with it release from fear, at least temporarily. They untangled themselves and got up, hesitantly venturing outside, but feeling safe in the daylight.
The yard was a wreck. The woodpile had been scattered, and the bedding left out for airing the day before was in tatters.
They cleaned up the mess and, after a hasty breakfast, retraced the route to the magic door, checking for any place where they might be ambushed along the way. If they wanted to leave, there was no other choice except to run the path at night; waiting at the tree for the full moon to hit its peak was unthinkable.
On the way back to the cabin, they detoured to the clearing to collect the packages, which had been stuffed into satchels this time rather than baskets or bundles.
Back at the cabin, the two men worked quickly and efficiently to prepare for the night. Neither wanted to get caught outside when dusk fell.
Chores done, dinner eaten and the remains cleared away, they opened the satchels. Ray wasn’t sure what to make of the contents. “Huh.” Aside from foodstuffs, there were knives, amulets and both a cross and a crucifix. Ray held up the cross. “Thinking of converting?”
“It will ward off the vampire,” said Dief.
“Yeah, I figured. I’ve seen enough horror movies to get the idea.” He handed it to Dief. “Keep it close.”
They repacked the bags with what they thought might be needed once they went through the door. Between what they’d packed and what they’d hidden away, Ray and Dief would not be caught without basic supplies when they went through the door.
Now all they could do was wait.
Ray had no idea how long they’d been asleep - he didn’t even remember drifting off - but he was pretty sure a noise woke him. He listened, eyes trained on the door. Nothing. Just as he started to relax a clatter sounded on the roof.
Dief jolted awake and frantically looked around.
“Easy buddy,” soothed Ray, even as he eyed the ceiling suspiciously.
The door rattled. “Ray? I know you’re in there.”
Ray huddled against Dief and stayed silent.
“You really are being silly about this, Ray. I’m not going to hurt you. We’re going to be together forever, remember? It was so good to finally be able to touch you, hold you. In fact, you seemed to enjoy what we were doing, too - at least before that fucking dog got in the way.”
Ray flinched to hear those words. The voice was Fraser’s but the words were definitely not.
“I really should have left the stupid wolf where he was. I mean, seriously. A deaf wolf? Looking back, the best thing to do would have been to turn him loose and just let nature take its course - survival of the fittest.”
Ray turned and hugged Dief close. “That’s not Fraser,” whispered Ray.
“I know. I’m okay.”
Ray doubted that. He hugged Dief closer, pressing his head to his chest as if he could somehow block out the hateful words. As freaked as Ray was about the vampire’s obsession, he knew Dief had to be hurting to hear those awful words spoken in his long-time friend’s voice.
Eventually, the vampire got tired of taunting them and began throwing things at the cabin. The rhythm was unpredictable, calculated to unnerve the occupants. Ray reached under his pillow and pulled out the cross, holding it in one hand just in case.
When dawn came, they finally fell into a fitful sleep, only to rise at noon to finish their preparations.
“It’s tonight, right? Please tell me the door unlocks tonight.”
“Tonight. I can feel it,” said Dief. “I’m not sure how long we will have so we must be ready to go quickly.”
“Yeah. Nothing stopping us except the Fraser wanna-be. Any idea how we’re going to get past him? Somehow, I don’t think he wants me to go - especially not with you.”
Dief grimaced, an expression that reminded Ray of canine Dief eating dog food.
Out in the yard - which had once again been trashed - they tossed out the old water and filled the buckets with fresh, and gathered more firewood for cooking. That was when they found Rocky.
“Ray! Come quickly!”
Ray ran at Dief’s shout. He wasn’t sure what to expect, but it wasn’t the sight of Dief holding a small furry body.
“Ah Jeez,” groaned Ray. “Rocky.”
Dief hastened to reassure him. “He’s alive, but injured.”
“Better bring him in, then.”
First aid for squirrels was not something Ray had ever considered studying. Dief admitted his knowledge was more on catching and possibly eating them than in helping them. Trial and error, with a large dose of patience from Rocky, revealed that the squirrel was not badly hurt. However the shallow gouge on his side meant he probably wouldn’t be running any races anytime soon.
They settled him in a nest of blankets with some water and food and left him to rest.
Ray bit his lip in thought. “I’m guessing he’s what Fras- uh, that thing tripped over last night.”
“It would appear so. Rocky is very devoted to you.”
“Yeah, well, it’s been just him and me for a while.” Ray looked over at his tiny friend. “I’m glad he’ll be okay.”
Dief sidled up behind Ray and propped his chin on Ray’s shoulder.
Ray made a half-hearted attempt to dislodge him. “You know, buddy, you’ve got a really pointed chin.”
Dief shifted enough to nip at Ray’s chin. “Something we have in common, then.”
Ray glared at him. “You’ve got a smart mouth, too.”
Dief showed Ray what his smart mouth could do, kissing Ray senseless.
“Just so you know, I wasn’t actually complaining.”
The closer they got to nightfall, the higher the anxiety level in the cabin. Even at a run, it would take several minutes to reach the exit. Neither man doubted that the vampire would do everything in its power to stop them.
“What we need is a distraction,” said Ray, sipping his tea.
Dief looked intrigued. “What did you have in mind?”
Ray shrugged.
Rocky distracted them, scampering awkwardly across the floor and inspecting the small bundle of wood near the stove. He was moving slowly, but he was moving. Ray figured he’d be able to look after himself as long as he steered clear of monsters.
“You know, I’m going to miss that little guy,” he told Dief.
“Ray, where do you think the ambush will be?” asked Dief, a thoughtful look on his face.
Ray shrugged. They had pinpointed almost a dozen possible places when they went over the path. They had even considered the possibility that they would be attacked as soon as they left the safety of the cabin.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?” asked Ray.
“He can’t risk losing us. If we get away we could find help or seek refuge.”
“Do you think he’ll stop us at the door itself?”
“Yes, but the moon will not peak for a few hours. We have to get there before him.”
“Sure, and we have to keep him from coming after us,” said Ray. “I’m open to suggestion. What are you thinking?”
“You.”
“Me.”
“You.”
Ray was pretty sure his friend had lost his little wolf mind.
“Don’t look at me like that, Ray. We have to work fast if we want him away from that tree.” Dief got up and pulled a knife from one of the satchels.
Ray backed away when Dief approached. “Whoa! What’re you doing?”
“Do you trust me, Ray?”
“That’s a hell of a question. Of course I trust you,” he said, eyeing the knife warily.
“The vampire is like an animal. The senses are strong - like smell.”
“So...”
Dief grabbed Ray’s hand and made a shallow cut on the palm. Ray flinched but did not pull away. Dief took one of Ray’s dirty shirts - the one he’d used to clean up with after an earlier round of ‘thank god we’re still alive’ sex - and used part of it to wipe away the blood.
After bandaging Ray’s hand with a clean strip of cloth, Dief picked up Rocky and handed him to Ray.
“What the hell are you doing?”
“A distraction,” he said, tearing a strip off the soiled cloth and fastening it around Rocky. “This smells like you, so he will follow.”
“You seem awfully sure about that.”
“I am. He wants you; he will follow.”
Ray grimaced. “That’s just creepy. Hey, what about Rocky? That thing finds out it’s a trick, he’ll take it out on this little guy.”
“Ray, he is a squirrel. Even if he can’t run fast, he can still get into places no one can follow.” Dief laid a hand on Ray’s shoulder. “He will be fine.”
Ray looked down at Rocky squirming in his lap. “Yeah. Okay. Let’s do it.” He lifted the squirrel until they were eye to eye. “You be careful. If you end up dead I will not be a happy camper. Got it?”
Rocky squirmed even more and tried to jump down.
“It has to be now, Ray, before it’s dark enough for Be-the vampire to move freely.”
They went to the door, opened it and set Rocky down. Rocky’s tail flicked a few times and he scratched a bit at the strip of fabric. Without warning, Rocky darted out the door, into the woods and was gone.
Ray stared forlornly along the path Rocky had gone. When Dief slid an arm around his waist, Ray sighed heavily. “What now?”
“Now we leave. Make sure you have everything.”
While Ray double checked they had what they needed, he watched Dief make piles of blankets and kindling with candle stubs nestled in them. “Come light the candles, Ray, and then we can go.”
With no more than a quizzical look at his friend, Ray obediently lit the tiny candle stubs. It only took a moment to realize that, the way everything was arranged, the kindling and blankets would sooner or later catch fire. He looked around the cabin. The wooden structure would probably go up quickly as well.
Ray looked at Dief with new respect. Wolves were tricky and seemed to know the damnedest things.
Shadows crept over the path as they ran for the magical door and freedom.
Reaching the door was almost anticlimactic. They hid themselves as best they could and waited for the door to be revealed. Moonlight gradually reached past the treetops, slowly illuminating their surroundings.
An inhuman screech split the night, raising the hair on Ray’s neck. Dief’s sudden stillness reminded him of the time Dief - the wolf, Dief - hunted a perp in one of the old warehouses on the lakeshore. Dief had gone still like this, eyes focused and ears pricked forward. When he suddenly sprang into action, the bastard never stood a chance. He’d been found, taken down and dragged out where he and Fraser could arrest him.
Another scream sounded and the woods went silent, as if everything in it was hiding.
Ray’s attention was suddenly caught by a glow on the tree in front of them. The shape of a door was taking form. Jeez, this was really happening.
Dief nudged Ray and pointed behind them. Over the treetops an orange glow could be seen. The cabin had caught fire. He hoped it kept the vampire distracted long enough for them to get away.
Ray jumped at the sudden “Ray!” shouted from the woods. “I’m not letting you leave me. Do you hear me? You are mine - mine!”
Dief broke cover and went to the half-formed door. He grabbed a branch and thrust it into the opening and pulled it back. The branch was intact, so he motioned Ray to join him. “It’ll be a tight fit, but we can’t wait.”
Ray was about to ask who should go first when Dief grabbed him and stuffed him through the portal. Ray almost got stuck, but finally fell out the other side. Before he could pick himself up off the ground, Dief stumbled through and fell on top of him. They scrambled to their feet intent on finding safety but when they turned, they were confronted by villagers with torches.
“Oh, shit,” muttered Ray.
Dief, however, called to someone who stepped forward. They began speaking a language Ray did not understand. As the words flowed, he realized it was a form of Polish, not unlike the dialect his grandmother spoke. Ray wished he’d bothered to learn it.
When Dief put himself between Ray and the villagers, Ray began to get even more nervous. He understood two words: ‘zly’ which he was pretty sure meant bad, and wila, the fairy thing.
“Nie,” said Dief repeatedly. He talked more, gesturing back to the door, which was now fully formed. Ray heard the word wapierz, which seemed to get quite a reaction.
“Dief, what’s going on?”
“I’m trying to tell them you are not evil and that a vampire is coming.” Dief’s look was one of frustration. “They don’t want to help - they are afraid.”
Ray suddenly remembered something his grandmother taught him, insisted he learn if he learned nothing else. Stepping from behind Dief, Ray held out his hand in a gesture of supplication and, in badly spoken Polish said, “Prosze.” Please.
The low murmuring of the villagers almost drowned out the sound of unearthly screeching. Everyone turned to the doorway as it shimmered. Something was coming through.
Ray never hesitated. He grabbed the nearest torch and thrust it through the opening. The pained howl became a single word. “Ray!”
Dief grabbed Ray and pulled him away. Ray’s actions, however, inspired the villagers and they began poking their torches into the portal, which seemed to be getting smaller. He looked up. The moon had moved and clouds were rolling across the sky.
A woman’s voice caught Dief’s attention. “Roza!” He went to her, hugging the tiny old woman. He then turned to the young man, almost a kid, beside her and engulfed him in a hug as well. “Szymon.”
Taking her hand, he brought Roza to Ray and made introductions and, what may have been explanations. A couple of men from the mob - well, that’s what they looked like carrying torches like that - came over and joined the conversation. They cast a few glances at Ray but otherwise ignored him.
Ray didn’t like feeling left out, but he didn’t want to interrupt, especially if it could get them some help. Finally, Dief nodded and turned to Ray.
“We must hurry. The same power that made this door is making another one. It’s near where I was found. They say someone comes through every so often - usually they die before they are found. The last time the door opened there was a lightning storm that lasted two days. They don’t know where it leads. No one has gone through from here. Karol, the healer, he says it might take us back. Or maybe kill us. But--”
“But we have to try.” Ray looked at the tree engulfed in flames and felt his eyes burn. He’d be going back to a world where Benton Fraser was dead and buried. How many times did he have to lose him?
“Ray?”
Looking at the small group around them, he tried his best to ask where they had to go. “Gdzie?” he asked in halting Polish. When - if - he made it home, he was going to enrol in Polish classes. However, his halting attempt to speak the language was met with favour and they were escorted along an overgrown path up a hill.
They rounded a blind curve and came face to face with a glowing door. The tree itself appeared to be growing out of the rock wall behind it. The door in the trunk shimmered but was fading away.
Ray’s eyes met Dief’s and he knew what they had to do. With a hasty goodbye to Dief’s foster family, they joined hands and faced the door. Wishing with everything in him that things had been different for all of them, they stepped forward.
Ray stopped suddenly, and pulled Dief to face him. Raising a hand to his friend’s neck, Ray leaned in to rest his forehead against Dief’s.
“No regrets,” he whispered desperately. “No matter what happens, I have no regrets. You are my friend and my lover and I love you. You got me?”
Dief shifted until he could press his lips to Ray’s, ignoring the shuffling and murmuring of their audience. “No regrets, Ray. You are my heart as well. Pack mates, no matter what.”
“No matter what,” vowed Ray. He squeezed Dief’s hand and stepped through the door - and face first into a brick wall.
“The hell?” Ray barely stumbled back before Dief crashed into him, pushing him against the wall once more. When they turned around, the door was gone.
Ray and Dief were in a dimly passageway of some kind. However, instead of torches, there were a few bare bulbs hanging from the ceiling. They made their way along the corridor until they found a covered opening in the wall.
Dief touched the covering and whispered to Ray, “Not solid.”
Ray listened, but couldn’t hear anything on the other side, so he pushed against the fabric. It tore open along the edges, allowing Dief and Ray to step into a room; a room that lived on in his nightmares.
They were in the house of the crazy sisters.
Voices from down the hall cause a momentary panic. Dief rushed to the opening they’d come through and began patting the fabric back in place. Ray could now see that it was a painting. Once the edges had been tucked back into the frame - it looked crappy, but would probably not draw immediate attention - Ray and Dief looked for a place to hide.
They ended up crouched behind a rather large sofa, although it proved unnecessary as the voices simply moved past the room.
Tentatively they stood up and looked around. As far as Ray could tell, the place hadn’t changed at all in the months since he’d last seen it. He glanced at the picture they’d broken through. That explained where the guy with the axe had come from. Ray couldn’t help but look down where he’d last seen Fraser. No blood. The old biddies probably had some kind of super rug cleaner that took out blood stains.
He started to ask whether Dief wanted to explore a bit more or slip out and try to contact someone, but got distracted by movement outside. Ray stepped closer to the window and wished he had his glasses. In the distance a car was approaching along the private road. As it got closer, the hair on Ray’s neck stood up.
“Dief? You might want to see this.”
Dief hurried over in time to see the car cruise to a stop. “That...Ray that’s impossible.”
“Says the human wolf,” scoffed Ray. “This is bad, buddy. This is very...oh god...”
Ray grabbed Dief for support as they watched Fraser - their Ben - get out of the Goat. To see him so alive was almost more than he could take in. So much so he almost missed seeing himself and Dief get out of the car as well.
Dief muttered a quiet but emphatic, “Oh, shit.”
It was an indicator of how shaken he was that Ray didn’t even think about teasing him for swearing. Watching the argument unfolding by the car, Ray had an epiphany. “Ben doesn’t have to die.”
Dief’s head whipped around. “What?”
“We know what’s going to happen, Dief. We can stop it,” whispered Ray frantically.
“He doesn’t have to die... But how? We can’t just go out there and warn them.”
Ray considered the options even as he watched the argument taking place. There wasn’t much time left. He hurried over to room’s door and started looking around. “Hurry. One of those vultures had a bat or something that she hit you with.”
Dief rubbed the back of his head and came over to help search. He pulled a baseball bat from behind a sideboard table and held it out to Ray, who went to hide it behind the sofa.
Ray just hoped it would be enough to change events. A flash of red outside caught his eye. Fraser was marching up the path to the door. They were out of time.
“Ray.” Dief’s urgent whisper brought his attention back to the room. “There was someone back there. That’s what I sensed before.” Dief stood in front of the painting that hid the secret passage.
Ray didn’t hesitate. “Right. New plan.” He hefted the bat and joined Dief at the painting. “We wait for the bastard that killed Ben and make sure he doesn’t get another chance.”
Dief’s smile was feral.
They were once again behind the painting - which was really a door when they looked closely at the frame - when the door bell chimed. Dimly, they heard the murmur of voices at the door and then the shrill call of “Sister! Do hurry, we have visitors. The police are here. Put on the special tea for them.”
Securely hidden from sight, the two men slid down the wall to sit of the floor; they had no idea what would happen next. A strange sound caught Ray’s attention. He looked both ways along the passage trying to figure out where it was coming from.
Dief shot a questioning look at Ray when he suddenly stood up. Ray shushed him before Dief could say anything. He pointed down the corridor to their left and made a chopping motion. Dief nodded and stood with him. Ray hefted the bat while Dief pulled out a knife.
They approached the turn in the corridor where Ray flattened himself against the wall, Dief at his side. As the heavy footsteps came closer, Ray raised the bat and when the man appeared around the corner, he swung - not for the head, but to the knees. With a howl, the man went down, losing his grip on the axe as he hit the floor.
Ray was shocked, and possibly disappointed, to see that the monster of his nightmares was an old man, probably in his mid seventies. He glared up at Ray, madness burning bright in his eyes.
Shouting from the doorway drew Ray’s attention. From what he could make out, the howl had definitely been heard. He turned back to warn Dief but could only stare at the sight before him.
Dief knelt over the man, whose throat had been cut ear to ear. Ray raised his eyes to Dief’s and was transfixed by the way the golden brown eyes seemed to glow in the dim light of the passageway.
Dief shrugged. “Protect the pack, always. Threats must be removed.” He stood and wiped the blade on his pants.
Never had Ray been more aware of the fact that the man he had welcomed into his bed and his heart was, in fact, not human.
The distant sound of sirens and shouting distracted Ray. Without thinking, he dropped the bad and held his hand out to Dief. “We can’t be found. Come on, let’s go.” He was relieved when Dief took his hand and allowed himself to be led past the body and deeper into the hidden passages.
When they could no longer hear the commotion behind them, they paused trying to decide where to go. A sudden sharp pain in his chest drove Ray to his knees. Dief fell with him, trying to cushion his fall.
Ray tried to reassure Dief. “It’s okay, just a twinge,” he gasped. Dief did not look convinced, but the pain was easing. “I’m okay. I-I think this is supposed to happen.”
“Is this...is this the end? Are we going to die now?”
Ray shrugged even as he pulled Dief closer. “I’m not sure. Think about it, Dief. There can’t be two of me or two of you, even if one of you is human.” He took a deep breath, easing the constriction in his chest a little more. “We did it, buddy, we changed things. Ben is alive - alive! That’s what’s important, right?”
“Protect the pack, always,” whispered Dief, slouching down to rest his head of Ray’s heart for what they both knew would be the last time.
“Always,” echoed Ray. He lifted Dief’s head and kissed him gently. “I’ve got no regrets, Diefenbaker. None. I loved Benton Fraser, but that never had a chance to grow. And I love you; I just wish we had more time. Do you understand me? This is worth everything.”
Dief’s eyes glistened, and a tear slowly trailed down his cheek. “No regrets,” he whispered, returning Ray’s kiss.
“No regrets,” whispered Ray as the world seemed to fall away, leaving him to float somewhere outside himself. “No regrets.”
“Ray? Did you say something?”
Ray frowned. At least, he thought he did. It was hard to tell when all his body parts seemed disconnected from each other. “Hmm?”
“Open your eyes, Ray. Can you do that for me? Please? Ray, open your eyes.”
Ray wondered what had Fraser is such a panic. He sounded very un-Mountie-like talking like that. Wait, he was supposed to do something...eyes. Oh, yeah, open his eyes. He could do that.
The light stabbed through is head. “Too bright” he mumbled, snapping his eyes closed again. “Hurts.”
He heard something click. “Sorry, sorry. Try it now.”
It wasn’t so bad this time. He smiled up into worried blue eyes. “Hey.”
Fraser smiled back. “Hey,” he said, reaching past Ray for something.
Ray turned his head gingerly and watched Fraser push the call button. Oh. He was in the hospital. What the hell happened this time? When he tried to ask, however, he choked on the dryness of his throat.
Fraser, who was obviously some kind of angel, fed him ice chips until he could form words. However, Fraser cut in before Ray could ask what happened.
“Do you know who you are? What’s your name?”
Was this guy for real? “I’m a Polish fairy an’ m’name’s Tinkerbelle.” The expression on Fraser’s face had him choking on laughter. “Relax, Frase. First name Ray, last name Kowalski, or Vecchio; depends who you ask. Satisfied?”
“Not until you are out of here,” said Fraser. “Ray, I--”
The door suddenly opened and a doctor entered, trailed by a nurse. “And how are we feeling? It’s about time you woke up?”
“Feel kinda floaty,” mumbled Ray, thinking that under other circumstances it might not be a bad feeling.
“That’s the sedative. We’ll see about weaning you off it if everything checks out,” said the doctor. He turned to Fraser. “If you will excuse us, we’ll just examine him. Perhaps you could step outside?”
Fraser obviously didn’t want to go.
“S’okay. He can stay,” said Ray, wishing he could convince his mouth to work better.
“Thank you, kindly, Ray. If you’re sure...?”
Ray focused on Fraser, ignoring the doctor who was giving the nurse instructions about something. “Stay on one condition.”
“Anything.”
“Tell me why I’m tied to the bed?”
“Well, uh, you see... Doctor, perhaps I should leave you to it. Ray, you’re in good hands. I’ll just go let Lt. Welsh know you’re awake.”
“Coward,” muttered Ray as Fraser all but ran out the door.
Fighting back a yawn, Ray tried to glare at the doctor. “Doc? Wanna tell me what’s going on?” He tugged on the restraint. “How about getting rid of these?”
“Let’s see how you’re doing first,” said the doctor.
Ray bore the exam with ill grace. He hated hospitals. By the time the doctor was satisfied and removed the restraints, Ray was almost asleep again.
The next time Ray opened his eyes, Fraser was asleep in the chair beside his bed. Ray didn’t like the dark circles under his eyes, and wondered again what had happened. Ray shifted more comfortably, pleased that he felt like his body was his own again. Once he’d settled, he watched Fraser sleep.
When Fraser’s eyes flickered open, Ray smiled, inexplicably feeling as though he’d just been given a rare gift.
After savouring his second cup of coffee, Ray settled back in his chair and gave Fraser his best interrogation look.
Fraser just smiled benignly. Bastard.
“Okay, give - and don’t spare the details. Why have I been doped up and tied to a bed? How long have I been here? What the hell happened? And while we’re at it, where’s the wolf?”
When Fraser did that eyebrow scratch thing, Ray knew he wasn’t going to like any of the answers.
Finally, Fraser asked, “What is the last thing you remember?”
“For the hundred millionth time, nothing! Jeez. Okay, uh, we were in the house with the vulture sisters. There was a god awful howl from behind the walls and next thing I know someone clocks me and it started snowing, then everything went black.”
“One of the sisters hit you with a jar, which broke, and the powder billowed out. You were covered with a chemical - a rather powerful hallucinogen, actually. When you woke up in the ambulance you started yelling about vampires and monsters and, uh, you became quite agitated by my presence. The driver had to stop so I could get out. It was the only way to calm you down.”
Fraser’s matter-of-fact tone of voice contradicted the hurt in his eyes. Ray felt like he’d kicked a puppy, even if he didn’t mean to.
“You’ve been heavily sedated for the past three days while the effects of the chemicals wore off.” Fraser smiled reassuringly. “The doctors believe there will be no lasting effects.”
“Good. That’s good.” Ray nodded, more to himself than Fraser. Ray suddenly gave Fraser a sharp look. “You haven’t told me about Dief? My buddy’s okay, right?”
“Oh yes, he’s fine now.” At Ray’s glare, Fraser clarified, “He, well, apparently he inhaled some of the chemicals as well. He had to be restrained to get him to the vet. Diefenbaker kept trying to attack me. I can’t imagine what was going through his mind.”
“Maybe he was so strung out he thought you were a moose or something.”
“Very funny, Ray.” However, Fraser grinned a little even as he chastised Ray.
The doctor’s arrival cut short their visit. Fraser headed out to attend to consulate business and promised to return that evening.
Ray called after him, “Bring decent food!”
~~~ ~ ~~~
While Ray was relieved to be home again, the nightmares were something he could have done without. Thankfully he was on medical leave for another week so the whole perpetually exhausted thing wasn’t an issue.
Every night since he’d been released, Ray had woken up just before dawn - usually screaming. It had been so bad one night that a couple of neighbours had called the police to report a murder. That had not been one of his better nights, never mind the embarrassment of have uniforms politely asking to look around. Sheesh.
The images in his dreams were so real, he finally sought help, but not one of the departmental shrinks, because he didn’t want to risk anything going in his file. Well, Vecchio’s file, but still.
The therapist he finally chose lived just outside the city and specialized in dream interpretation and past life regression - whatever that was. But the guy didn’t judge and didn’t mind if Ray used a fake name. The reputation of Ray Kowalski - and Ray Vecchio - was safe; Bruce Wayne, however, was another matter. That guy had issues on top of issues anyway; he wouldn’t notice a few more.
The considered opinion of the therapist was that the dreams actually memories from a past life. Ray just nodded his head while the guy talked, but privately wondered how that was possible. How could a past life happen in the present time? As far as he knew, past lives were just that, in the past. Like maybe a hundred years ago. All the same, he appreciated having someone to talk to about this.
By the time Ray’s leave of absence ended, he was more or less himself again. There had been a few visits with Fraser and Dief, but they’d been brief; Fraser kept looking at both Ray and Dief like they were going to flip again, and Dief just seemed depressed around Ray. Ray kind of felt the same way around Dief.
If the past-life guy was to be believed, then Ray and a human version of Dief had been together, and a part of Ray felt a little like grieving for a relationship that probably never happened. Of course, apparently, Fraser had been a vampire with the hots for Ray, so he tended to take all that past life stuff with a box of salt. Although, the idea of Frase being hot for him, that was a good thing.
Watching Dief mope around, however, Ray had to wonder if maybe Dief was remembering something, too.
The knock at his door startled Ray from his musings. Past-life crap aside, the sessions helped him in another way. Before all this happened, Ray felt pretty sure he and Fraser were heading to something more than friendship. Needing to move on one way or the other, he’d invited Fraser & Dief over for dinner. Tonight they were going to have The Talk.
God help them both.
Ray opened the door with a grin. “Hey guys, come on in.” Fraser seemed a bit twitchy, but Dief trotted in, licking Ray’s hand as he went by.
“You okay, Ben?” asked Ray, making the distinction between his buddy Fraser and the guy he hoped would be more than a friend. He hoped Ben understood what he was doing.
Steeling himself, Fraser handed over a file folder. Inside was the report from the incident at the house. Ray glanced over the arrest and interrogation of the sisters, who had been caring for their criminally insane brother. The brother, who had a history of animal torture had escaped from an asylum decades earlier and been hidden in the house. He had been found in a secret passage with his throat cut. No weapon was ever found. No witnesses, no evidence except for a baseball bat with smudged prints that were a possible match for...
“Well, shit - pardon my French. That’s not possible.” He looked up at Fraser. “How could my prints be on the bat?”
“How indeed,” murmured Fraser. “There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”
“Hamlet.” Ray grinned at Ben’s look of surprise. “Don’t look so shocked. Just because I mix up words when my brain goes too fast, doesn’t mean I’m stupid. Stupid people don’t make detective.”
“I never thought you to be anything less than highly intelligent. But, in all fairness, you never struck me as the Shakespeare type, either.”
“Yeah, well I’m just full of surprises,” retorted Ray. He held up the folder. “So, what about this?”
“If you look a little further you will see the fingerprints have been discounted. While there were similarities to yours, no one believes it is even remotely possible that they’re actually yours. The case remains, officially, unsolved, although the dead man is the likely suspect for the other murders.”
“And the sisters?”
“That’s up to the courts to decide.” Fraser hesitated a moment. “For what it’s worth, one, or possibly both of the sisters sent the information to the chief of police. How they managed to get access to the photos and reports is still being investigated.”
Ray leaned back in a comfortable sprawl. “That concludes the official portion of this evening’s agenda,” he said, and pointed to the chair. “Sit.”
When Fraser - Ben - hesitated, Ray put a little more force in his voice. “Now.”
Ben sat. Ray was pretty sure Dief was laughing, but since the wolf was going over to curl up in the corner, he didn’t comment on it.
“We have to talk, Ben.” Ray was ridiculously pleased when Ben refrained from playing dumb. “Look, we both know things have been changing between us. It’s been going on for a long time, but it’s really been noticeable since you went away.”
Ben leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “I missed you so much while I was gone,” he said. “That’s why I called every day. It felt wrong to be so far away from you. Even being home wasn’t. Home, I mean.”
Ray edged forward as well. “So, the question is, what are we going to do about it?”
“The possibilities are endless,” said Ben, sounding a little breathless.
“Oh yeah,” agreed Ray, sliding to his knees and moving in front of Ben, who obligingly spread his knees to allow him closer. “This has been a long time coming.”
“Too long,” whispered Ben. “Much too long.” Hesitantly, he lowered his head and lightly brushed his lips against Ray’s.
Ray felt as though he was about to go up in flames. The heat in his blood built with every brush of their lips. When Ben drew back and tenderly ran the back of his fingers over Ray’s cheek, it only added to the fire.
Ray reached up and wrapped a hand around the back of Ben’s neck and pulled him into another kiss. Minutes, or maybe hours, later they pulled apart, breathless and dazed and smiling.
Ben’s eyes darkened the longer he stared at Ray.
Ray fidgeted. “What?”
“You are a very good kisser,” he said.
“You’re not so bad yourself.”
“I want to do more than kiss.”
“I’m glad to hear it.”
Ben cleared his throat. And then did it again. “Ray, I hesitate to ask, that is, it is prudent, um, what I’m trying to say, that is ask, is-”
Ray lowered his head, trying to smother his grin. He looked up and said very seriously, “Yes, I’ve done it with a guy before. Yes, I’m clean. No, I don’t want to use a condom unless you want to - or need to. No, this isn’t just a one-night thing.”
Ben grinned one of his shy grins. “I’m glad one of us knows what they’re doing,” he said, looking a bit embarrassed. “Ray, I...well, I...”
Ray pressed his lips to Ben’s, silencing him. “I love you, too.”
Those were the last coherent words for quite some time.
~~~~~~~~~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~
--- EPILOGUE ---
The sunlight was weak, but it was enough to rouse Ray from sleep. This was the last day at the cabin before returning to Chicago.
As Christmas gift to Ben, Ray had rented a small cabin in Minnesota. It was isolated, but not so primitive that they had to do without indoor plumbing. In fact, they had even made good use of the hot tub on the deck every night. There was something magical about soaking in the bubbling hot water while stars sparkled above and snow covered everything as far as the eye could see.
Best of all, however, had been Ben’s surprise at Ray’s comfort so far from city amenities. And Ben was always so very appreciative of Ray’s surprises.
Ray stretched contentedly, jostling his bedmate in the process. He smiled indulgently at the sleepy grumble. “Sorry, babe,” he whispered. “Go back to sleep. It’s still early.”
Ray turned his head to check on his other bedmate. “You know you’re not supposed to be on the bed, right?” he whispered.
Dief lifted his head from Ray’s chest, yawned and put his head back down. Ray carded his fingers through the thick fur at the wolf’s neck. It was something they both enjoyed.
Ray was just drifting back to sleep when Dief stretched, almost rolling off the bed in the process, righting himself at the last moment.
“What a goof,” mumbled Ray.
“I love you, too, Ray.”
It took a moment for Ray to react. He lifted his head and stared at Dief. “Did you say something?”
Dief looked back innocently, yawned, and rested his head on Ray’s stomach, eyes fixed on Ray’s.
Definitely time to go back to the city, thought Ray. “Pfft, next thing you know I’ll be wandering through the woods talking to squirrels,” he muttered.
“Squirrels are noble and should be treated with respect.”
Ray sat up suddenly. “Holy crap!”
Ben opened bleary eyes. “What’s wrong?”
Ray answered before he could stop himself. “Dief’s talking!”
“What does he want now? And why is he on the bed?” Ben glared at Dief. “What did I tell you about sleeping on the bed?”
Dief groaned and rolled off the bed. “It’s not like I was here when you mated. Three times.”
Ray was pretty sure he was starting to hyperventilate.
“It’s not polite to pry into someone’s private business,” chided Ben.
Dief glared at him before padding to the door. “How could I ignore it?” he asked indignantly. “You were both loud enough to keep me awake all night - and I'm deaf!”
Ray could have sworn Dief winked at him before leaving the room. He turned to Ben, who had lain down again.
“I apologize for Diefenbaker,” said Ben, running his fingers along Ray's arm. “Sometimes he has no manners.”
Ray just laughed until his stomach ached. When he finally calmed down, Ben was looking at him with fond indulgence. “Welcome to my life,” he said. “I suppose when we get back I should introduce you to my father.”
“I thought he was dead.”
“Oh, he is," said Ben. "It doesn’t seem to slow him down any, though."
Ray just grinned. Past lives, human wolves, vampires, a back-talking mostly deaf wolf, and a loving Mountie in his bed. He couldn’t wait to see what came next.
---END And they lived happily ever after---