What IF (revisit)

[kickindancer]

"What if I didn’t live in a time and place where ART was an option?" That's how this post began, but quickly veered off onto the topic of religious faith and it's place in infertility. After rereading and thinking some more, I realized I hadn't completed the essay

Comments

[echoweaver]

Heh. I think I replied to your earlier post about this that your perspective on God's will is a very atheist one. I think that helps to validate that you are, in fact, atheist rather than agnostic because of the strong negative reaction you have to the idea of a higher power having a plan that, while it is a good plan, might involve you not getting something you want very badly.

I don't subscribe to this flavor of religion, but I understand why it's comforting. I think it's not a wise sentiment to throw at people in hard times whose feelings on faith you don't know. A lot of people I know, particularly ones who were atheist at the time or who realized they were atheist later, were very scarred by some well-meaning religious type who tried to comfort them by telling them the worst experience of their life was God's will.

[kickindancer]

Thank you for your thoughts,a nd understanding. And just for frame of reference, I revisited and revised this post for submission in a blog contest. I kind of wish I said what I'd really wanted to say the first time around, but it's a big topic to get across in a few paragraphs.

[echoweaver]

Yeah, it's a really big existential topic, and one worth discussing IMHO. I love topics like that. I just don't want to repeat myself

[kickindancer]

I guess I can understand why some people would/could find comfort in "Guess children weren't in God's plan for you." Like you said, if it helps someone sleep at night, to believe that she is part of a greater plan and there is a reason (albeit unknown) for everything, then there's no reason for her not to embrace that idea. It doesn't work for me, because I just can't believe there is a grand plan

[kernowgirl]

Found this post through the creme de la creme list. Loved it. I'm a non-practicing Christian myself, I do believe in God and am grateful to him that I managed to become a mother through IVF (along with everybody else who was involved), but as you suggested in the earlier comments, my personal creed is that God helps those who helps themselves. God's plan doesn't have a whole lot to do with me becoming a mother or not; infertility was my own challenge to rise to.

I can equally understand your point of view (my husband is an atheist), and the irony of your identical twins and religious people's reaction to them is painful. I wish more people would understand just how personal faith is. Hopefully your post will help to illustrate that.

[kickindancer]

Thank you so much for your thoughtful reply! And congrats on having your family. :)