bring me a popsicle, bitch

[kennapea]

the hours just keep disappearing this time of night/morning.
i start to feel like there's something wrong with my head:
i look at the clock and it 3; i look again and it's 4.15.
when i look again it's 5.
what?!

meanwhile, as a former telemarketer, i find this hilarious

Comments

[sellywelly]

Sorry but it is way too entertaining to watch you suffer.

Heads never get over hat mismanagement. I bet you'll never hear the end of that. They think they're all that just 'cause they've got a brain or whatever. Big deal. We've only got one head but a multiple of two of pretty much everything else. When the battle lines start being drawn, no amount of gray matter will keep the head from being outnumbered. It's just simple math. WHAT NOW HEAD? WHAT NOW.

[kennapea]

or may that's the problem!
we're over-thinking the problem.
maybe we need to take it out one-on-one.
we need to start pairing the brain up against other single organs to duke it out and leave the doubled ones out of it.
starting with the heart, the spleen, the...gall bladder, intestine, bladder, and then i'll pull out my secret weapon: i only have one kidney!
mwahahaha!

it'll be like my own little mortal kombat, but in my chest cavity and against my brain.
GO!

[doctor_shipman]

Look into my eyes.

You're feeling very, very sleepy...

[kennapea]

if it doesn't work with the cat, i really doubt you're going to have much luck, either.

[doctor_shipman]

OK, in which case I prescribe a mix of flunitrazepam, nitrazepam and lorazepam.

Take a printout of this to the pharmacy, I'm sure they'll honor it.

[kennapea]

oh, if only.

"and who is your prescribing physician?"
"dr. shipman. doctor...harold shipman. ahem."
"excuse me?"
"fill it! now!"