my face hurts ( Read more... )

dear cottonmanifestoI don't really know how to tell you this, but your nostrils are insulting and our horoscope doesn't match. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped with George Bush and his wife when I saw you carve your initials into my best friend. I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand that Santa doesn't exist. I'm returning your ring to you, but I ( Read more... )

dough stopped by the apartment this morning to drop off gifts.
he was all cheerful and friendly.
all i could think was, "it's too early for this."
the card from him reads:
Hope you Guys are doing
well and enjoying your
holidays. Best wishes for
the new year. Think of
you guys often.
love
Daddad ( Read more... )

being closed just because it's christmas is lame. there are people out there who are cooking things and, through no fault of their own (*cough*) have forgotten things and people who have ran out of diet pepsi and want to kill their SOs and pets. think of the SOs and pets, for Got's sake ( Read more... )

please stop hurting. i know i've been coughing a lot lately, but it doesn't make it any better when you hurt like my mother. i've been feeding you tea and cough drops all day; i'm not sure what else you want. if you have any other requests, feel free to email me, but otherwise, please just quit being a bitch. if you're really good i'll feed you ( Read more... )

you didn't get my ANYTHING on my christmas list. i mean, i got some sweet shit, but can you not read?
this year is going to be hell for you, buddy.

yrs truly,
kenna.

dear santa.

keeping my health this year into consideration, i think it would be wise to just go ahead and give me everything on my list. i could have been a complete pain in the ass about it, but NO! i was a peach, and you know it, fatty. so let me lay it out for you plain and simple: i'm not going to play the "if you get me lots of good stuff, ( Read more... )

dear kenna.
this morning equals shower > homework > class. TQC does not fit into that anywhere! get off yer ass and do something productive nao! for got's sake, at least put some pants on, woman! if you do, i may be willing to reward you with some pocky, but only if you hustle.
1>2>3>go!
sincerely and watching the clock,
kenna

in response to my note earlier, my migraine has obviously decided to fight back ( Read more... )

if you do not quit itching, i'll be forced to trade you in for oranges.

your host,
kenna