Comments | kebencaruso: Learn To Knock

kebencaruso

Learn To Knock

Jun 19, 2013 22:06

Title: Learn To knock
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: NC-17
POV: Jack
Summary: "Without any hope of finding a partner, I gave up and slid my hand through the waistband of my boxers and tried to get a good grip of my leaking dick."
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone in this fanfic. Honestly. Only the plot line is mine. :) This never happened.
WARNING: sexiness, ( Read more... )

top!alex, top!jack, pairing: jalex

Comments 8

atlaregay June 20 2013, 16:42:17 UTC

No such thing as too much foreplay, silly.

I have some pointers for writing better smut, if you would like? This has a lot of potential. xo

kebencaruso June 20 2013, 23:49:53 UTC

Yes please. That would be so much help! I really need it. I really dont have an idea on what i was doing. but, hey. it's my first time. :) pointers would be a really good help. Thank you.

atlaregay June 21 2013, 03:00:48 UTC

Okay! I don't mean any of this to be insulting, just constructive criticism ( ... )

kebencaruso June 21 2013, 03:36:27 UTC

Oh my god. Thank you! :) I guess I'll edit this now, try to make it better. Thank you so much!!! This really helped, you have no idea. Thank you. I'll make it better. I hope.. But i'll try. Thank you! :) Yeah there's so many grammar/spelling mistakes, I wrote it on wattpad and just posted it here. Sorry for that. But, I can't thank you enough for helping me. I hope I get better. I really have no idea what I was doing. But thanks :)

I'll post it right away once finished. :) And again, Thank you so much.

Thread 8