WINona Kirk in the HIZZOUSE, Y'ALL

[kayliemalinza]

This is what I've been doing for the past two days. Good use of my time? Yes, I think so.

Comments

[rubynye]

She is so adorable, I can't even! *makes ridiculous high-pitched noises*

[kayliemalinza]

Thank you! ISN'T HER TUMMY JUST SO CUTE? I didn't except it to be, but it was.

The story behind this is that Cmdr W. Kirk is on a mission to a cowboy planet and she, naturally, takes advantage of local fashions. Someone on the crew snaps a picture and it gets put in the mission report.

Then, several years later, Cmdr J. Kirk is on a mission to the same cowboy planet and he, naturally, takes advantage of local fashions. Someone on the crew snaps a picture and it gets put in the mission report.

As soon as Pike sees the new mission report, he laughs himself silly for ten minutes before pulling up the older mission report to show the crew. Then somehow, across thousands of lightyears, Jim and WINona high-five.

[rubynye]

Her tummy is LUSCIOUS. As is the rest of her.

I wouldn't mind seeing Jim's matching picture, especially if it involved chaps and did not involve a shirt. You know, just for comparison.

[kayliemalinza]

It does seem like she would be pleasant to hang onto, yeah? With a moderate yet fulfilling amount of squish. ::poke::

I already thought about this! Jim will technically be wearing a shirt, but it will be ripped. Of course. :D

I had not considered chaps, however. 'Tis an idea worth considering. ::sage nod::

[possibly_thrice]

COWBOY WINONA? I TOTALLY CALLED THIS. I HAVE A FICLET OF HER SOMEWHERE. IN ~BOOTS~.

Also god I would be donning a red shirt in under ten seconds for that poster, o Starfleet, why such hot recruiters?

[kayliemalinza]

WELL IT JUST MAKES SENSE. SHE IS A FUN-LOVING MIDWESTERN GAL, DONCHA KNOW.

ficlet? link? boots? yes?

They gotta replace all those security officers somehow.

[possibly_thrice]

I DO KNOW. OH HOW I KNOW IT.

yes.

fff and it will have been worth it is the worst part

[stunt_muppet]

It's the cowboy hat that really makes it, I think.

Though the swishy hair and perky pose don't hurt one bit.

[kayliemalinza]

The cowboy hat is the ~sooooul.

which means the perky pose is the. um. flesh.

:D
Did I go overboard with the hair? Nah. I just like including subliminal bondage. Chances are, the recruits who find that appealing are the best suited for Starfleet anyway. ^^

[stunt_muppet]

I don't think you went overboard with the hair, and because I'm clueless I didn't even notice the subliminal bondage until you mentioned it. But I suppose that's why it's subliminal, then.

"Jon Starfleet! Spend lots of time tied up and in peril, with occasional bonus tentacle bondage, hypnotism, and getting small furry creatures thrown at your head! (I mean, someone's gotta be into that.)"

[kayliemalinza]

I am now convinced that, sometime in Starfleet's history, there was a meeting in which that very sentence was uttered.

"Um, sir, I don't think it's a good idea to be so... honest in a recruiting campaign."

[order_of_chaos]

*joins starfleet*

[kayliemalinza]

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! :D

I would interpret that as a sign of the efficacy of my poster if I did not suspect that you simply like being told what to do. ^^

p.s. you're aliiiiiiiiive! I'M SO HAPPY.

[order_of_chaos]

^-^

Oh, I do. Imperatives are so much more entertaining than polite requests.

Your poster convinced my gut instincts that that bar was going to to be filled with bullet holes in the very near future and that ducking for cover would be a good idea right about now. (On the other hand, phasers. Have stun settings and everything, so probably not so much with the horrific amounts of property damage.)

Also that Winona Kirk is awesome, BUT I ALREADY KNEW THAT.

So am I!!!!!!! (FELL INTO LURK STOP DUG ESCAPE TUNNEL USING ONLY TEASPOON STOP ESCAPED STOP)

[kayliemalinza]

Phasers have a stun setting, yes, but WINona's boot heel is always set on "kill."

her breasts, in on the other hand, can be both stunning and killer. as can her gams.

Things would've gone very differently if Cmdr W. Kirk rather than Cpt Pike walked into that bar in the beginning of the movie.

WAS V WORRIED STOP ABOUT TO SEND RESCUE DOGS STOP HOPE TUNNEL DOES NOT COLLAPSE AND DESTROY A CITY STOP

[kel_reiley]

that is AWESOME

[kayliemalinza]

Thank you! I simply couldn't resist the idea.