Comments | kastari: ~BSG: Hourglass

kastari

~BSG: Hourglass

Oct 12, 2010 23:31

Title: Hourglass
Author: kastari
Summary: He was her doctor and her friend. He wanted to be her savior.
Characters: Cottle, Adama/Roslin
Rating: T
Word Count: 100
Author’s Note: Written for the 29th ar_drabbles challenge. Prompt: Third Party POV
Disclaimer: I’m just playing in Universal’s sandbox.
( He crushed out his cigarette. )

cottle, adama/roslin, drabble challenge, ar_drabbles, drabble, bsg

Comments 17

redrockcan October 13 2010, 11:47:46 UTC

So poignant, I definitely need a tissue. Our Doc, such a softy underneath all those cigarettes and scruff. I particulary love this line "speaks to you in a voice I’ve never heard before". Such a wonderful detail that I know Cottle would have picked up on listening to them so many days and nights. I know he wanted to save her more than anything, that's what makes it all the more heartbreaking when he can't. I really need that tissue!! Sniff!!

kastari October 16 2010, 07:09:30 UTC

I believe that Cottle's exterior is a facade. It's his interior I truly love exploring.

Yeah, I think Bill's voice did change when he spoke to Laura. He loved her so.

If only her men could have saved her...

sczep84 October 13 2010, 12:16:43 UTC

Wow. *claps* That was brilliant. Ur such a terrific writer.

kastari October 16 2010, 07:14:34 UTC

Awww, thanks. ♥ You know how I love the Doc.

sln1 October 13 2010, 13:06:11 UTC

This format gives each of those short sentences great impact, so much information and emotion in a few words, Cottle's pain so achingly clear with that simple repetition of 'I can't save you'. The image of the hourglass is enhanced in this style too with a real sense that Laura is slowly and inexorably ebbing away.

You have managed to convey the depth of the relationships between these three characters wonderfully well, all of them people with a distinct professional façade of their own and the ability to see beyond each others.

'Home is with him.', 'We lied to each other, pretending to believe in miracles.', 'And I wonder if he will ever forgive me when you're gone.'. Beautifully poignant and insightful, the truths they know and the truths they choose to acknowledge.

Stunning. Bravo.

kastari October 16 2010, 07:37:32 UTC

I could just see the sand falling...

To me, Cottle is gruff, tight lipped, sharp tongued, & very emotional underneath it all. His words may be clipped, but their meaning soars.

I can't save you. -- Cottle admitting that wrecked me.

I believe these three were the epitome of friendship.

angeltrisha9 October 13 2010, 13:39:16 UTC

*sigh* you're brilliant. That was great, No, wonderful in a totally tearing up my heart way. I can just see him in the corner of sick bay, looking at Laura and Bill reading searider falcon, puffing on his cigarettes, eyes so sad under the eyebrows. You are Brilliant.

though I have to say, me think that not only has Adama forgiven our favorite gruff, he probably grasped his shoulder, said nothing for a minute, simply looked at him in the eye and thanked him.

kastari October 16 2010, 07:33:04 UTC

*blush* Thanks. ♥

I definitely think Cottle spent a lot of time watching Bill & Laura.

And yes, in the end, I believe Cottle & Adama looked to each other for strength to survive.

cutemaggie October 13 2010, 16:43:41 UTC

:((((
&hearts

kastari October 16 2010, 07:23:02 UTC

*hug*

Yes, :((((

Cottle so wanted to save her...

♥