[Multi-chapter] How can I love (2/??)
Title: How can I love
Author: tsuchi8562
Beta: geminib <-- Thank you so very much!
Pairing: SakurAiba (main), Aimiya, JunBa (friendship), Juntoshi
Rating: PG-15
Genre: Romance, Drama
*MASTERPOST*
Aiba woke up, wet from sweat, breathing heavily and feeling that his briefs are surprisingly tight. He had THIS dream again… Hands touching him, taking his clothes off, lips kissing his skin, nibbling his nipples, fingers entering him… Sho’s face above him, thrusts, moans, sweat, voice whispering his name. That could mean only one… The one of THOSE days has come. No.. Not days… WEEKS. This was the time when Masaki felt frustrated and was hyperactive. Usually he was going to gym or just ran to tire himself and sleep peacefully, but at night THE dreams were coming.
“Shit…” He whispered and decided to take a cold shower; all he wanted was to get rid of the scene in his mind and go back to sleep. Aiba entered the bathroom and took his underwear off. He moaned softly when the material delicately rubbed his semi-hard erection and in a split of second he stood under the streams of cold water, hitting his skin without mercy. Masaki shivered, but somehow he got used to the low temperature; he took that kind of therapy once in a while, when the lack of someone’s touch became unbearable. But the most important was the fact that this ‘therapy’ worked every time, like if his body learned to stop craving for physical contact after that shower. After a few minutes he was back in bed, still shivering a bit but calm and relaxed and felt asleep till the alarm clock rang annoyingly. Fortunately, he was far too busy in the morning to feel aroused again.
They were shooting another episode of Shiyagare at the evening and had some photo-shooting before that, so Masaki rushed to the location but the only person he met there was Nino. The shorter man was wearing jeans and some yellow shirt-ish thing and seemed to be a little annoyed.
“Yo!” Kazunari raised his hand. “They decided to go with the colors again… I hate yellow…” He sighed and leaned on some wooden pole, making sure that he won’t stain the clothes first. Masaki smiled and went to the dressing room to meet half dressed Sakurai who was struggling with a red piece of material that stuck on his head. It would look hilarious if not the fact that Sho’s chest was naked and Aiba was tensed while watching the moves that his band mate’s muscles were making. The taller man stood still for a while and then decided to help the other man. He came closer, smiling and in few seconds he opened the hidden button and soon the rapper could look at his own reflection in the big mirror, smoothing the material of his shirt.
“Thanks Aiba-chan… You saved my life. I could suffocate with this…” He smiled and patted his friend on the shoulder. Masaki returned the smile and dressed up quickly, leaving the room soon afterwards.
The shooting went well, as always and all band members had a couple of hours of a free time before going to the NTV studio. All of them decided to eat something, so they went to the closest restaurant.
“Hey, what are you doing after shooting? Maybe we will go for a drink?” Nino proposed, looking at his friends. Jun nodded and that meant that leader will go too; those two were inseparable.
“Sorry guys, not tonight… I have a… meeting…” Sakurai winked and smiled widely.
“Uuu… New girlfriend? You’re fast!” Kazunari whistled and turned to the tallest man. Aiba didn’t make any move and remained silent, trying not to look at Sho. When it was certain that nobody will say a word until Masaki will answer Ninomiya became a bit irritated.
“Aiba-chan but you are going, ne?”
“I’ll pass… Need to go home early…” A hoarse and shy voice replied.
“Come on! You won’t leave me with those two? I don’t wanna be a third-wheeler! Just for a while… Geez, don’t act like some nun!”
Masaki nodded gently and remained silent for the whole lunch, having Sakurai’s words stuck in his mind. “I have a… meeting...” And he had to say that just when Aiba has his tough days. Image of Sho having sex with some woman was unbearable, so probably drinking wasn’t a bad idea? He would sit at his home alone trying not to go insane anyway, so he could spend this time with his friends instead. The entire way to the studio he replied in monosyllables and Jun knew well that his friend was suffering. Despite the pain he felt, Masaki glued a smile on his face and acted like usual, fooling around and get smacked by Matsumoto or Nino for his silliness. Normal, typical even, recording. However, the youngest member of the band didn’t buy Aiba’s calmness at all and he wanted to talk with his friend at the first reasonable opportunity, to show him that he is worried.
“I am fine.” Masaki stated before Jun could even ask any question.
“I’m not buying it. We know each other far too long and I am not that blind. Aiba-chan, you should confess…”
“No! Jun, can’t you see that it’s useless? Sho-chan doesn't even… No, I can’t.” Masaki sighed and tried to omit his friend, but Matsumoto didn’t let him go.
“You can’t live like this… I want to help you but I don’t know how…”
“Jun, I am fine! Don’t worry about me.”
“But…”
“I said stop! Do you know what would happen after my ‘confession’? Think about Arashi!” Aiba knew well that he said too much and he sighed. “I’m sorry… But I’ll be fine, don’t worry about me.” He headed towards the door and joined the other two members smiling like never before.
“Look at you! Mister I-wanna-stay-at home! Glad you decided to come with us?” Kazunari giggled when Masaki nodded and tripped. “OK, you have enough already, no beer for you!”
“Oi! Shut up mister third-wheeler!” Jun joined to that little quarrel between friends after a while, but he seemed to be a bit angry. No wonder, his closest friend was lying to him and he was feeling betrayed. Of course he knew that Aiba always hid his worries because he didn’t want to cause any troubles to anyone, but this time it lasts for too long. It wasn’t good for his health; he was once hospitalized because of stress, but even that didn’t teach him to share his problems with friends. For heaven’s sake, Masaki needed a psychologist, not booze! Soon they arrived to the club and after ordering some drinks went to the private room, where nobody will disturb them. Soon the order came and all 4 of them were chatting and fooling around. As expected, the brat was joking at Jun’s and Ohno’s love-dovey behavior what made Matsumoto irritated but it was perfectly natural between them. After a few beers even Aiba was relaxed and stopped thinking about Sakurai and the thing he was doing right now.
“I wanna play a game!” Nino spited suddenly and that made the other members laugh.
“You ALWAYS want to play a game…” Ohno said somewhere between giggles.
“Yes, but this time I want to play with all of you! Truth or dare…” Kazunari started to look around waiting for any reply.
“You’re drunk. I think that we should go home already” Jun whispered and embraced Satoshi.
“Oh, shut up… Better say that you wanna fuck your little boyfriend”
“Nino, I swear, one more word and…”
“Guys, calm down!” Masaki muttered and drank a big gulp of beer. “I’ll play with you, you jealous brat!”
“OK, so truth or dare?” Ninomiya hissed, apparently annoyed by the nickname Aiba just gave him.
“Truth… I don’t have any strength to get up.” The tallest man giggled and looked at his band member with curiosity in his eyes. Kazunari smirked and with full satisfaction he asked:
“OK, smart guy. When did you last had sex?”
The silence filled the room and Masaki sobered in a split of a second. Of course he could think of some lie, but same word ‘sex’ itself made him feel angry. It was stronger than him; apparently this tough period didn’t over yet. He didn’t say a word, just clenched his hands in fists and tried to calm down.
“Nino, what kind of question is that?” Matsumoto had enough and he wanted to leave, taking Ohno and Aiba with him, but Kazunari stopped them.
“He wanted to play! Now he has to answer! And the question is normal! So, Aiba-chan, care to reply?”
“Fuck you Nino…” Masaki hissed, what made Kazunari angry. He quickly jumped on the tallest man and took a glass with beer.
“Come on, answer or I’ll pour it straight to your throat!” Two men started to struggle and some of the drink spilled on Aiba’s face. Jun wanted to stop this madness, but harsh Ninomiya’s voice ordered him to stay out of this.
“It’s not your business anyway…” The brat muttered and continued the small battle with Masaki.
“Nino, seriously this went too far! Stop it right this second!” Jun yelled and tried to pull the older member off of Aiba, but he didn’t manage to do that; instead he just caused that another portion of beer landed on Masaki’s face.
“Four years…” Aiba whispered finally, wanting Nino to leave him alone already. Nobody said a word after that and soon Masaki left the club heading home with teary eyes.