Comments | kannagara_rpg: [log] Eyes, look your last. Arms, take your last embrace.

gojyo_saaama in kannagara_rpg

[log] Eyes, look your last. Arms, take your last embrace.

Sep 09, 2009 15:40

Who: Gai (youthfulpassion and Gojyo (gojyo_saaama)
Style: Paragraph
Status: Closed
Where/When: early Thursday morning, Gai and Gojyo's place
Warnings: PG-13 for language violence and adult situations

( For two minutes, the morning was the same as any other. )

*complete, ~sha gojyo, ~maito gai, *closed, !log

Comments 13

youthfulpassion September 9 2009, 22:44:07 UTC

There was nothing kind or gentle about the shove which sent Gai tumbling out of bed. Nothing to soften the jarring impact of consciousness returning as Gai scrambled to his feet in a ready position, naked or not, to face this new threat even as he opened his eyes to force away the fog of sleep. And there was certainly nothing to protect or ground him from the torrent of memories pouring into his mind, a maelstrom of 'could be's and 'what if's and 'never did's curling in a loving snarl around really happened, tangling themselves into a ferocious Gordian Knot that rivaled the sheer intensity of the storm outside. Gai reeled.

(Thoughts tumbled and churned like a waterfall, pounding at each other, at his peace of mind, at the rest and happiness and stability he'd only moments ago been enjoying. To remember, with absolute clarity, two most separate and contradictory lives you've been living for months on end.... To know, with absolute certainty, that one was always true, and that one never was--but to know as well, deep in your heart of ( ... )

gojyo_saaama September 9 2009, 23:57:41 UTC

"There is no goddamn together!" His voice rose, the first shrill notes of panic straining painfully at the back of his throat. No together. No us, no Gai-and-Gojyo, no fucking way. Even if he knew the man standing there as his lover, his trusted friend, his whole fucking world, it was still wrong. Fake. A trap, somebody's idea of a sick joke, not real.

Shakujou tingled under the surface of his palm, and Gojyo clenched his fist tight, shoving the urge away before it even truly formed. "Stay the fuck away from me," he warned. He should cut this impostor down, he knew, like he'd cut down the shadows in Kami-sama's palace. But he couldn't bring himself to do it. This was still Gai.

This man... the things he'd let - the things he'd begged this man do to him. Gai knew him inside and out, knew all his secrets (all the ones that mattered, anyway; stories of past wars were best left in the past). Gai'd shown him tenderness that he'd never expected to ever experience. Gai'd been his friend, treated him like an equal in a way only one other ( ... )

youthfulpassion September 10 2009, 01:10:47 UTC

"Gojyo.... You can't mean that." There was a distinctly plaintive note to his voice; Gai wanted to be calm, to soothe Gojyo, to try and smooth over the hurt that they obviously both felt. Being shoved away like this, so abruptly.... It was far worse than the initial, physical shove had been. It was as though Kakashi were ordering him off his property. It just.... it wasn't right. This sort of thing just wasn't done. Did he really....?

(Was that it, then? Was Gojyo tossing him aside without even a thought for what they had been through together? What they had been to each other? It felt as though a teammate were rejecting him after being genjutsu'd. Their senses were being betrayed, their mind was being betrayed, all at once, and yet Gojyo sprang immediately to strike at the heart.... It hurt. He doubted that Gojyo meant to be cruel, but.... it hurt. And it always would, no matter how thick Gai's skin might be, no matter how hard his head."You can't...." Gai sighed and moved forward in spite of Gojyo's order, reached out to put a ( ... )

gojyo_saaama September 10 2009, 01:38:26 UTC

Gojyo froze, pants still unbuttoned, when Gai approached. He didn't know what he was expecting - a punch, some ninja-fast attack that he'd never see coming - but a concerned hand on his shoulder and kind eyes brimming with tears wasn't it.

He could brush those tears away. Whether the last few weeks had been a lie or not (they were, they had been, he couldn't doubt that even for a moment!) Gai was a good man. He shouldn't be hurting on Gojyo's account.

Gojyo could brush those tears away. He could hold out his arms, and have Gai's warm, solid chest press against his. Comforting. Safe. He didn't have to say a word - Gai would understand, like he always did, and that neverending strength would pour from him. Supportive. Always so supportive. Always there, and he'd be there, wouldn't he? He'd be right at Gojyo's side as they sought an answer to this problem. He'd be right there, smiling and strong, and he'd keep loving Gojyo with every bit of that huge heart of his ( ... )

youthfulpassion September 10 2009, 22:23:12 UTC

Gai's hand twitched and flexed, fingers curling; he wanted to reach out again, to take Gojyo by the shoulders--both of them, this time--and look him in the eye, to settle them both for a minute and make them think and talk calmly, rationally, like civilized adults. Because they were adults, weren't they? They could do this. They should do this. They should be able to reason through things and come to a conclusion, be able to make some sort of plan of action to deal with this.... revelation? Crisis? Problem? Situation?

(But in his mind he could hear a child's piteous sob tapering into a crumpled whimper, useless and discarded, unwanted, lost like the wind whipping a piece of garbage down the street. 'Please don't go. Don't leave me!' Small soft hands that were already calloused, reaching for a shattered scarlet visage, a smile blown into the dust, a slick hot smear, dripping and glistening like the burning tears there was no time to shed. 'Where will I go? What will I do? What's going to happen, now that you're gone? What's going ( ... )