I actually have refrained from posting anything more out of an only just subconscious fear of it being judged again. It became a conscious concern about two days ago, and so I've been thinking about it for a lot of that time. It took a while to grapple with the idea that I actually did care what people said. And while I know I usually go to the ( Read more... )

Okay; after a long period of time thinking about many a different thing, I've decided I'm not happy with the person I am, but am uncertain how to make myself better. So I've come up with a solution: Other people can tell me. The rules are simple ( Read more... )

Given I've quite possibly reached a new depth of "loser-ishness" tonight, I figured it's about that time, so sat for quite some time to try to decide exactly what I want to share with the world. And after a long period of pondering it came to dawn on me that their isn't much I really do. Take tonight for example; what good does it do to admit that ( Read more... )

I feel truly horrendous. I just wrote to my parents, explaining the costs and factors involved if I were to choose to remain in the US for school. I feel like such a spoiled brat for listing out the prices, counting up the dollars and, while I apologised profusely and gave them every opportunity to say no, expecting them to foot the bill ( Read more... )

I know certain parties are more than a little annoyed that I've not been updating my journal, but aside from the fact I don't really care, I've not had that much to write about. Sounds odd for being overseas, I know, but really I've been spending my time recuperating from the year so far ( Read more... )

I've still not gotten any sort of reply from the Phantom Crusher and, despite the fact s/he is probably enjoying the face it is driving me insane, I would really appreciate them coming forward; if only to give my mind some peace and let me get some rest. I know it's kinda pathetic to admit, but as with all other mind games, I've been losing sleep ( Read more... )

I never even heard of this Meme ... but:

Who has a crush on ( Read more... )

I've tried to start this post with an amusing quip of some sort already, and that didn't work. I also contemplated using a song quote, or some sort of amusing obscure quote from some artsy movie that's a lot less intellectual than it is trying to be. None of that really worked. So instead I think I'll just use my inability to start a journal post ( Read more... )

I'm not sure there's any reason I keep trying to update this page; I really don't have anything new to say and I am quite certain that no-one really wants to read my angst. From peering through people attached to my friend list, it would appear that most have realised that no-one wants to see their sorrows ... or have actually found their ways to ( Read more... )

I initially didn't know whether or not I wanted to share these sentiments with those that still read my journal, but in the end I figured I needed somewhere to empty my head and if others happen to read them I shan't be held responsible for how it might change their opinions of me. I know my disclaimers haven't done much to discourage people in the ( Read more... )