Two Doomsday + PoTW drabbles

[kae_nine]

As promised to 

Comments

Interesting

[sprdr]

It is not that often that we have the pleasure, the privilege I should say, to read a drabble in two versions. Somehow, I'd rather the English one, more doctorish for me.

Re: Interesting

[kae_nine]

*grins* Glad you liked it! Usually I do prefer the English version as well, but this time it's a bit strange for me - had the hardest time in the world adapting Lost Illusions, whereas Masks just seemed to translate itself more easily. *shrugs* Go figure!

[sensiblecat]

This is so evocative, it really captures the pain, fear and wonder of that little scene. It has a huge erotic charge, too.

[kae_nine]

*blushes* Thank you so much for the very kind words. :) It's just, Ten just had that power, doesn't he? When he gets so close to her, reaches for her hand, and proves her he's still the same man. *melts*

[wendymr]

Yeah, surprisingly enough, I prefer Masks too ;) You think it could have anything to do with my sheer inability to watch Doomsday? ;)

Keep up the great work! :)

[kae_nine]

I think I also prefer the way Masks came out, for some reason. Yet you know I'm a big Doomsday fan. ;) Thanks for the comment!

[azriona]

I really like Masks - which isn't to say Lost Illusions isn't good, but I really like Masks.

I wish my French wasn't so over-written by Russian; I'd love to compare the two versions. I've always thought translations were interesting, because the meaning of a particular sentence can change based on the words the translator uses. I have to wonder - since you translated your own words - which versions do you like better? And why?

('Tis the Ravenclaw in me, can't help it.)

[kae_nine]

Actually... for Lost Illusions I think the French version sounds better, but for Masks it's the opposite. Weird, isn't it? I don't translate literally, first because literal translation are usually very bad, and also because I have to adapt it to make it 100 words.

So why do I like the English version of Masks better? Well, what usually makes me like a version better is that sometimes, conveying certain emotions or thoughts is easier in one language or another, because the vocab is more appropriate, and/or because the music of the language works better.

I hope that answers your question. :)

[azriona]

It does, thank you. Now what interests me, since you like the English version of Masks better (and I just like Masks better than Lost Illusions) - is there something that was lost in the translation of Lost Illusions which was gained in Masks?

(See, told you - Ravenclaw at heart; I just can't leave theories unanswered....!)

[kae_nine]

Bit of a convoluted reply, but you asked.

I looked back on both versions for both drabbles. Let's start with Lost Illusions:

In French:
Elle colle sa tête au grand mur froid séparant les deux univers, espérant un son, un signe de sa réalité, le TARDIS apparaissant soudainement à ses côtés, le Docteur revenant la chercher.

In English:
She leans against the cold, white wall that keeps both universes apart, listening for a sign from her own reality, the TARDIS materialising, the Doctor coming to get her.

First, the verb "leans" isn't exactly like what I used in French. "Elle colle sa tête" means she's basically glueing her head to the wall, but that just looked way too weird in English. Still, there's something that got lost there. On the other hand, "the Doctor coming to her get" works better for me than "le Docteur revenant la chercher", probably because of what Nine said to Rose in Bad Wolf/PoTW: "Rose, I'm coming to get you."

In French:
Seuls les battements de son cœur résonnent à ses oreilles.

In English:
Only the furious