Comments | k_leale: "Two Weeks Lost" (LotR RPS VM/OB) (PG-13)

k_leale

"Two Weeks Lost" (LotR RPS VM/OB) (PG-13)

Feb 10, 2004 22:17

Title: Two Weeks Lost
Author: Leale
Rating: PG-13
Fandom: LOTR RPS, VM/OB
Summary: Orlando doesn't ask why or where or for how long.
Feedback: Would be lovely, if you have the time and inclination.
Archive: Sure, just let me know.
Author's Note: Thanks, of course, to valour for the beta. Not particularly in the "Stupid Bar Tricks" series, but not ( Read more... )

Comments 11

ezzvaldez February 10 2004, 19:49:59 UTC

Ah, how I love your Viggorli.

This made me sigh with happiness. :)

Re: k_leale February 13 2004, 06:43:27 UTC

Aw, thank you. :) I'm glad you enjoyed!

(The comment has been removed)

Re: k_leale February 13 2004, 06:43:42 UTC

Thanks!

shebit February 11 2004, 04:41:35 UTC

Lovely. I liked the line about pulling over but not to fix the AC - it shows that these stoties don't need smut, you can use your own imagination about what happens at the roadside.

There's a typo in the last line, by the way.

I read a really depressing viggorli last night, where Viggo was a bastard, so I needed this one to cheer me up.

Re: k_leale February 13 2004, 06:50:03 UTC

Someday I will write smut, but today is not this day! *grin* Thanks, I was kind of pleased with that line myself. I couldn't imagine Viggo being able to resist a water-drenched Orlando, but didn't want to break up the flow of the piece.

Ack! Typo has been fixed, many thanks. :)

Glad this could cheer you up!

Re: shebit February 13 2004, 06:58:35 UTC

I too have yet to write smut - the furthest I've gone is a viggorli kiss. And who could resist a soaked Orlando?

smithereen February 11 2004, 23:37:15 UTC

I've been enjoying all your V/O cause your fics always leave me with a smile on my face. But I thought I'd comment on this one in particular since it's stylistically different. I like the way you did the narrative, the way each day gets a paragraph and specific details. I really like the way you conveyed so much about the relationship through those details, and without using dialogue. (Not to say I don't love dialogue, and yours is snappy and fun in your other fics, but I think what you did without it is very cool too.) And how you used those details instead of Orli having an inner monologue that details each feeling he has. It gives this a subtlety, but the feelings are still conveyed clearly without the explicit spelling out of each one ( ... )

Re: k_leale February 13 2004, 06:53:37 UTC

Hi! This is a wonderful review, thank you!

I'm glad you liked the change in style. The girl who beta's all my stuff said, "This doesn't sound like something you'd write at all," and I thought, Um, is that good or bad? ;) I'm glad that both work (especially because I'm not sure I'll be able to pull something like this off again!) and that you enjoyed the story. The details were just all kinds of fun to come up with. :)

pseudonihilist February 13 2004, 10:21:45 UTC

This is wonderful. It's smooth and subtle...it flowed. Most of all, the narrative voice is so perceptive - I love how a physical action in the story holds so much more meaning than simply what is described.

Of course having found this I went back and read your other fics, too, and enjoyed them all. Would you mind if i friended you? I don't want to miss any upcoming fics :)

k_leale February 13 2004, 15:33:01 UTC

Wow, thank you. :) What a lovely observation! I'm pleased that you enjoyed the previous fics, too--definitely a different style. I'd be flattered if you friended me. Do you mind if I reciprocate? :)

Re: pseudonihilist February 13 2004, 15:50:01 UTC

not at all; I would be honoured. i look forward to reading more from you. :)