Hey!

[dark_gumshoe]

My parents are dead, Pal.

Comments

[upsideudgey]

Hmm. I still don't see how that's relevant to the case...

But maybe that's because all the blood is rushing to my head.

[dark_gumshoe]

I'll tell you why it's relevant, Pal. It's 'cause it all comes from the same place. The same people. The scum who oughta be scrubbed off the streets, rubbed out for good, who do nothin' with their lives but terrorise and murder the honest, hard-workin' folks whose only crime is livin' in a society that's too wrapped up in itself to do what needs to be done.

That's why I became a cop.

[smilesedgeworth]

Oh, don't be such a grump! Nobody likes their parents to be dead, but nasty things don't seem nearly as bad if you grin a great big grin and whistle a happy tune! Now let's turn that frown upside-down!

[upsideudgey]

Hmm... are you quite sure it isn't already upside-down?

[capn_von_karma]

Yargggh, matey! Join my crew, and we'll hunt down the lubbers who did it and make 'em walk the plank!

even if they didn't do it

[upsideudgey]

Now, I'll have no talk like that in my courtroom. We have a perfectly functional justice system in this country, even if it does appear to be the wrong way up at the moment.

[capn_von_karma]

Har harr, m'ludder! I weren't suggestin' nothin' untoward! It's all perfectly legal!

in international waters

[upsideudgey]

Mr. Cap'n, I must caution you that if your speech patterns continue to stray from "pirate" into the realm of "farmer", you will be found in contempt of court.

[gar_phoenix]

OI OI OI OI OI

I'LL FIND WHO KILLED THEM AND SERVE THEM AN I'M THE BEST LAWYER IN THE WORLD KICKKKKKKK

[upsideudgey]

Ahem! The defence shall refrain from... whatever it is that the defence is doing.

[gar_phoenix]

WHAT!? HOLD IT! WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM!!?? I AM PHEONIX WRIGHT, ACE ATTORNEY AND WITH MY SPIKED HAIR I WILL PIERCE THE HEAVENS OF JUSTICE. THIS DEFENCE BENCH IS MY THRONE AND I WILL FIND THE WRONGDOERS AND SEE TO IT THAT THIS MAN'S PARENTS ARE AVENGED.

[smilesedgeworth]

Oh my gosh! So enthusiastic!

I don't want to dampen your jolly spirits anyhow, but... um... well, Daddy said that you always need proof of whether someone did a bad thing or not! Otherwise it might not be the right person, and that just plain isn't fair!

[ramenfan1986]

Heyyyy, you look kinda familiar, Pal.

[dark_gumshoe]

That's because we're all the same, Pal. We're all just nobodies, just disposable muscle to be tossed aside when we ain't makin' quota any more. P'raps it wasn't always like this, but that's just how it is now. That's how they think you gotta do things.

[sedatedlarry]

Look at it this way *drool* now that they're dead, they're at peace and it's all quiet and...zzzz.

NO MOM, NO SCHOOL TODAY!!!!...zzzzz

What?

[gar_phoenix]

OI OI OI OI OI

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE

THIS IS NO TIME TO SNOOZE

MUTHERFUKKIN GODDAMNIT GET OUT THERE AND KICK SOME GODDAMNED ASS

[sedatedlarry]

That ain't my job, man. I'm just a friend of a friend who knows a friezzzzzzz. *drools*