just my take...jennylisaAugust 25 2007, 11:22:52 UTC
Remember, the anticipation is always far worse than the actual event...
If you decide to go, you may encounter a moment or 2 of confusion or contemplation, but then have a rockin' (appropriately so for family, of course) good time with your family and your father will see that he's the only one who is having a problem. Might put it in perspective. Or, might help your mother along in her decision to move on to see how well you're treated by others, and not by him.
You deserve a family that supports you, and it sounds like you've got a whole bunch of it. I'm sorry the main issues lie with someone who is supposed to be accepting no matter what. But man, do you handle this all with a grace like nothing I've ever seen. Your strength in making yourself who you are, and *being* who you are is remarkable. Being who you are shouldn't have to be a battle, but you fight when you have to. I just wish, I'm sure with many others, that the people you did battle with weren't ones you held lifelong connections with.
Re: just my take...just_jayeAugust 26 2007, 09:30:26 UTC
you rock my world... that was beautifully validating. thank you. i did go, and i had a good time. I was able to see and spend time with the family members that matter the most to me. it was a great experience and I am so glad that in the end I decided to go.
i'm sorry this is so difficult for you jaye. i understand how hard it is, in some respect, as i have chosen to go against what i want many times for the sake of my mother not bearing the wrath of my stepfather. i don't really have advice for you as to whether you should go or not. that, i think, is up to you. i wish you luck on whichever you choose.
it's amazing what a wife will do for their husband/boyfriend/sig. other over their children. This isnt quite the same thing but I used to see something similar with my clients... mom's boyfriend does something, mom blames child, DSS says child cant come back to the home if boyfriend is there... mom chooses the boyfriend over her own child.
i think my mom is finally fed up with choosing to make her husband happy over her own children.
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If you decide to go, you may encounter a moment or 2 of confusion or contemplation, but then have a rockin' (appropriately so for family, of course) good time with your family and your father will see that he's the only one who is having a problem. Might put it in perspective. Or, might help your mother along in her decision to move on to see how well you're treated by others, and not by him.
You deserve a family that supports you, and it sounds like you've got a whole bunch of it. I'm sorry the main issues lie with someone who is supposed to be accepting no matter what. But man, do you handle this all with a grace like nothing I've ever seen. Your strength in making yourself who you are, and *being* who you are is remarkable. Being who you are shouldn't have to be a battle, but you fight when you have to. I just wish, I'm sure with many others, that the people you did battle with weren't ones you held lifelong connections with.
Sound like a textbook
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i think my mom is finally fed up with choosing to make her husband happy over her own children.
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