How Do You Live?

[juliebata]

That's the question I get asked whenever the subject of unemployment comes up. I've been out of work for five years. "Are you looking for work?" is the next question. And when I answer "no", I get the look. They don't say it out loud, but the look says "wow, you must be really lazy

Comments

[juliebata]

Crosspost comment..

[new_world_smurf]

See my icon for my initial reaction.

But I'm not one to sugarcoat things. I get depression, I've been there. I hit bottom so hard I bounced. I lived in welfare motels and survived on bologna sandwiches or stuff from my job (I worked in the bakery of a chain restaurant, then the Evil Empire, a/k/a Walmart) because if I was lucky I could spare a couple of bucks a week for food. You guys must have had one hell of a full bank account if both of you have gone for five years in Seattle, a notoriously expensive city, without jobs.

You're not stupid, lazy or worthless, but at the same time at least one of you needs to figure out how to bring money in. If you're so depressed that you can't leave the house, you may want to check out Community Psychiatric Center, maybe they can help you. And I apologize in advance if I set off your judgement alarm, but you say you can't leave the apartment but you want to go to Wiscon? I can guarantee that if somehow you do find a way to go you'll hate it. You'll hear people bitching about their jobs

[slave_driver]

I'm depressed too, but for different reasons. I wish I had some words of advice for you but I don't. I just hope it makes your burden a little easier to bear knowing that there are others out here who are going through experiences similar to yours. I think this modern society crushes people. When you really look at how we're expected to live you realize that it's insane. But if you're someone who knows how much things are screwed up and you feel anxious or depressed about it, you're the abnormal one. No, you are not abnormal, you're actually one of the sane ones. But by being one of the very few people who are sane in an insane world they will accuse you of being insane

[replyhazy]

Okay, as far as Wiscon goes, I just nominated you (they say anybody can nominate) for Wiscon member assistance. So you do not have to worry about asking, I have just asked for you. You should hear by March 15 if you are getting anything.

I'm really sorry to hear you are struggling so hard with depression. I know it is really hard to talk to a doctor or anybody about it. I found it scary. Mine got very heavy in 2007 and it took me a while to bring it up to my doctor, but when I did, meds helped a lot. (Don't know if that's right for you, just sharing my experience.)

So maybe start here: http://www.dshs.wa.gov/pdf/dbhr/mh/mhfeelingbetterguide.pdf
and just read it. Then, the tough part, a phone call... I know you can do it. I have faith in you.

(And also: make some art. Any kind. Whether on your car or on cookies or on the backs of napkins. Because I know you are a little happier when you are making some art.)

::hugs::

[vgqn]

*hugs* I don't have any advice to offer, but I think you've just taken a huge step by writing this post.

Some other folks have said that they have found these posts to be useful to explaining to others what suffering from depression is like. (I've become fond of the expression, "Wow, those fish are super dead!")


http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2011/10/adventures-in-depression.html
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2013/05/depression-part-two.html

Good wishes!!!

[wild_patience]

*Hugs* This was brave of you to post. Thank you. As others have said, you are a vital part of the fan community.

I was unemployed for just 5 months and I found it too easy to slip into depression. I think 5 years would do me in. One thing that helped me was to exercise - I rode my bicycle and took walks. I hate to exercise, but I do like to ride my bike. I'm not fond of walks, but if I can't ride my bike, a walk will do, and I download audio books from the library to my iPod so I have something fun to listen to.

You are not stupid, lazy, or worthless. You are loved by many, many people.

[kalimac]

What I hate is people who talk about finding jobs as if they were just lying around on the street to be picked up.

I've been both the favored person and the unfavored person in different areas of my life at various times. And I know that, if you are the favored person, you hardly have to lift a finger and good things come your way: your only necessary task is to respond swiftly and pertly. But if you're the unfavored one, not even the most monumental and carefully calibrated effort will produce any result whatever.

All I can say about your particular situation is that I wish I could come up to Seattle again some time so that we could have another enjoyable visit to pass the time agreeably. And that you have one very precious and vital thing in your life: you have Luke. And he has you.