Thoughts on getting engaged

[joeboi4u]

So I'm at a loss trying to make this decision. I have 3 viewpoints in my head and your help would be appreciated. One, if i can successfully change my gender marker on my documents, that would give me some major male and hetero priveledge. So there is the thought that, "Why should i get married if gay people can't". But that leads to the second

Comments

[blue_braces]

In some ways I'm sympathetic to the "fuck with the system" reasoning. But ultimately, I have serious misgivings about legal marriage for anyone. I would like to see an end to the involvement of the state in all marriages. Lisa Duggan has a clear argument about this that I agree with, in these two articles:
http://www.thenation.com/doc/20040315/duggan
http://www.thenation.com/doc/20050718/kim

That said, the system is the way it is and people have to make choices for survival, economic and otherwise. If it's just about the ceremony, though, I'd say just have a personal/spiritual/whatever-suits-you ceremony with other loved ones and leave the state out of it.