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[jillyanne]

Everything seems to be getting so much harder physically... My whole body is aching and I'm just feeling... weak, for lack of a better word. Like... I'm not particularly dizzy, but I find myself reaching for a wall or a railing to lean on when I walk. I know when I feel like that I need to slow down when I walk, but it's difficult for me to do. I

Comments

[eneit]

*hugs* Chronic illness is never easy to deal with and I fully understand the need to try and appear stronger than you actually are. I do it too. I had to tell a very good friend what to do if I collapsed while with her at Worldcon last weekend, and every single word was bitter gall. Now this person is very competent, and probably the best person possible to have around at need. But I resent that need, more and more with each passing year.

[jillyanne]

Thanks Eneit! Sorry it's taken me so long to respond... I know what you mean, I just can't get used to the fact that sometimes I can accept my limits and have no problem showing that weakness and then other times I will let myself get to the point of near collapse just to keep it hidden.... And then I wonder why people don't "get it"... And I am totally spoiled by the fact that for a long time all of the closest people to me not only got it, but understood enough to watch out for me and "save me from myself"... it's not that way anymore... I don't know... lol It's always great that I can come here, and when I have the energy I can share with people who do "get it" :)