BSG fic: Unions of a Kneeling Chapter Eight: Distortion is Marketable
Disclaimer: I don't own BSG. The title is by CS Lewis. This chapter's title is by Eugene Peterson.
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight: Distortion is Marketable
Athena rolled her shoulders to relieve the tension and then knocked on Adama’s hatch door. A muffled voice answered and she slowly twisted the handle.
It hadn’t been so very long ago that she’d been having weekly chats in here with the Admiral. But everything seemed to change when the Cylons came back.
“Sit down, Lieutenant.”
She sat down in her usual spot and he poured her some tea. It seemed strange to her that he even knew exactly how she liked it.
“Thank you.”
She accepted the cup and stirred it, waiting for him to speak.
“How are you and Helo doing? Is this hard on you?”
“I can’t believe you’re asking me how I’m doing.”
“I’m trying not to think about myself at the moment. I know you’re not her.”
The admission was given in a low voice, but Athena still caught the implications of his tone. This was very hard for him.
“It’s been difficult,” she admitted. “But in a way it’s like coming home and seeing a future I didn’t think possible. I just don’t know if anyone else can see it.”
“Well, let’s hear your report. Maybe I could.”
Athena took a gulp of tea and let the slightly earthy, herbal taste sink into her mouth before revealing to him everything Sharon had shared with her as they downloaded.
“So it’s true.”
“As far as I can tell, sir. She truly wants reconciliation between us. And she can’t live with herself because of what happened between you two.”
Adama looked at Athena sharply.
“That isn’t relevant to the situation, is it?”
“I beg your pardon, Admiral, but it is. This is nothing if not personal. It’s not about diplomacy or Earth. It’s about whether or not the past can be put behind us. I don’t think anyone would disagree with the fact that if there was no history, integration with the Cylons would be incredibly beneficial to both of us.”
“So, it could all come down to whether or not I can forgive an attempt on my life?”
“And whether she can get over the betrayal. Both done to her and by her.”
“That I can’t answer for.”
“No, but I can assure you that she’s trying.” Athena waited a moment as conflicting emotions played over his face. She knew she was one of the only ones who got to see him when he was troubled. Even Lee and Roslin weren’t a part of that. Not anymore. “Can I speak freely?”
“You can try,” he said lightly.
She smiled and searched for the right words.
“Boomer is someone between two worlds. I know what that’s like. You’re someone with a huge decision to make and the fate of humanity rests on your shoulders. Somehow, I don’t think Baltar is going to be very useful in this decision.” He smiled at that. “I spent so long feeling angry and bitter over what happened. But I came to realize it was all just guilt. For the choices I made: betraying my people, losing the baby. The man at the top has to forgive himself. Even if you’ve done nothing in your past, which I don’t think anyone can say, you have to forgive yourself in advance for making what could be the wrong decision. You’ll never know.”
“I shouldn’t even be listening to you,” he grunted. She kept silent. She was used to him feeling unsure about her. It had been awhile since he voiced it. She hoped it was only him remembering the past year and everything that had happened before it. “But I don’t feel alone with you.”
“I’m glad, sir.”
“I trust you.”
“I honestly don’t know how, but I’m grateful.”
“So, I’ll meet with Boomer again.”
“Thank you.”
“I will be blaming you if it all goes bad,” he said and from his smile, she could tell he was joking. It was a good sight to see. “Thank you, Lieutenant. You may go.”
“I’m off duty now. I think I’ll let Helo know the situation.”
“I’m sure he’ll appreciate that.”
Adama shook his head at her and she let a smile play around her lips before leaving.
It was a weight off her shoulders.
***
Even in a place that was designed for multiple copies of one body, it was still odd to see so many Threes in one area.
“Your report?” asked one near the front.
Boxer shook her head.
“The old lady wouldn’t say much, but she obviously knew what I was after and that tells me that we’re right.”
“We are basing a lot on a mere dream,” another Three spoke up.
“Roslin corroborated it whether she knew so or not,” Boxer insisted.
“We believe you. But we want more.”
“Well, we need more. But it will have to wait until we have more information. We have to get back to Galactica.”
“We hope you can go soon,” the first Three said.
Boxer nodded and the meeting of Threes dispersed.
***
Kara finished her patrol and stopped in at the infirmary. It had been a long time since she’d been on a schedule like that. Life on New Caprica was eat, sleep, survive. She was more used to Galactica and the cycle of card games, flight patrols, and everything else that she loved. She was relieved to be back to it.
“How is he doing, Doc?” she questioned Cottle before actually talking to Sam herself.
“He’ll live,” was Doc Cottle’s customary abrupt response before he took a drag on his ever present cigarette.
Kara smiled. Some things never changed.
“How’s it going, Anders?” she asked, ducking around his curtain.
Sam struggled to sit up in his bed.
“I’m not happy lying around like an idiot.”
“Too bad. Doc wants you to rest.”
“So, tell me everything. Or were you waiting till I expired from boredom?”
She sat on the edge of his bed and told him everything that happened in the meeting. She tried to leave out the parts that involved her being glared at by Lee or confronting a possible ovary-abducting Cylon.
“I guess Adama will want to know what Athena conjured up.”
“The old man definitely has a soft spot where she’s concerned. It’s wrong.”
Kara’s tone was only half kidding. She, admittedly, was in the not shooting Athena camp, but they’d had time to come to terms back on Caprica. Plus, that hadn’t involved the rest of the fleet. She owed the Cylon her life and that meant something. But the entire situation hurt to think about, so Kara didn’t try. She’d leave that to the Admiral and Lee. When he wasn’t glaring at her, that is.
“I’m almost glad I wasn’t there.”
“In the end Apollo had a fit and stormed off back to Pegasus.”
“He’s been uptight since the groundbreaking ceremony,” Sam said casually. “Don’t sweat it.”
“How can I when he acts like I’m a frakking leper?”
“You don’t exactly treat him like he’s your brother, Thrace.”
Kara wasn’t sure how to respond to that. She didn’t want to and she did her best to ignore everything that came out of anyone’s mouth that had anything to do with that topic.
“He was like my brother, but it all changed.”
“I’m guessing only you would know how that happened.”
Kara wanted to run away. Sam had brought up the subject in the past, but never pursued it with any tenacity. He wasn’t employing the same tactics this time.
“Why would you care?”
“Why would you think I do?”
“I don’t know.”
“Kara, what aren’t you telling me?”
“Stop acting like my father, Anders. It’s nothing.”
Sam put his hand over hers and held it even when she tried to pull away.
“After Caprica, we said we were going to try this. I thought we fell for each other, not just me on my own. I’m not against you. We are married, let’s try and act like it.”
“It’s not something you want to know.”
“It’s not like I’ve never heard anything about the two of you.”
Kara looked at him. He didn’t look angry, he didn’t look like anything, except like someone with the flu. Later on, she would blame the pasty-ness of his face.
“We had a thing. On New Caprica. We just couldn’t work it out. I couldn’t.”
“Some more details would probably help flesh that out.”
“I was with you, he was with Dee. We, we frakked, okay! He wanted to tell you guys, but I couldn’t do it. I wanted to be free. And I married you.”
“Cause I wouldn’t chain you like he would? Or cause I’m easy to just toss aside?”
“I didn’t want to hurt you. It wasn’t about that.”
Sam's face was clouded over with pain and Kara knew it wasn't from his flu.
“I’m feeling worse now. Let’s talk later.”
“Whatever.”
Kara got up and stormed out of the infirmary. Going with her usual method of not talking about it would have really helped.
***
Lee walked inside and threw his towel on the chair. He’d been to the gym and he could honestly say it was the best decision he’d made in a year. It had been exhausting, but very right, to get back in there and he wasn’t going to give up.
Tigh was waiting for him. Lee sighed. He had hoped to have some time to build himself up to seeing Dee when she was off her rotation. Seeing Kara again had brought up all sorts of ugly past memories and he knew if he was to be fair to Dee, he needed to deal with them. As if that wasn’t enough, there was also the Cylon problem.
“Got a plan, Apollo?” Tigh asked from his position in Lee’s chair.
“Get some dinner later. Night in with the wife.”
“This isn’t a joke.”
“Not when you don’t laugh.”
“Your father’s got the frakking Cylons all cozying up over there. The fleet’s going to tear itself apart.”
“Agreed. But he is the Admiral.”
“Well, do something about it.”
“Talking about my father behind his back has never worked out too well for me in the past.”
“I’m not talking about mutiny or tommyrot like that. I’m talking about sound, practical ways to break this to the rest of the fleet. Take people like, like that idiot Zarek…you think he’ll take this lying down?”
“No.” Lee rubbed his temples. The headache could have come from too much physical exertion, but he didn’t think so. “Look, I don’t have answers. But I’ll think about it. The fleet should get a say, the Quorum should be involved.”
“You better think about it. And fast. The old man’s too involved in this. He’s my friend, but he’s not thinking straight. Doing what he thinks is best, but he doesn’t remember how it affects everyone else.”
“Since when did you become the poster boy for the fleet?” Lee asked, leaning back in his chair.
“Spent a year down there,” Tigh admitted. “They’re a bunch of whining civilians, but it’s not their fault. We’re here to look after them, to ensure the survival of our species.”
“Pretty words from such a gruff exterior.” Lee stood up. “My opinion, the people should vote on whether or not we accept an alliance. But that’s something to plan carefully.”
“Agreed.” Tigh stood up as well. “We’ll talk again.”
“Welcome aboard, Colonel.”
Lee gave a salute which Tigh returned.
“Thank you, Commander.”
Lee sat back down. Back to the more emotionally trying problems.
***
“We should leave.”
The Four was adamant. The Ones clamored with their agreement.
“Enough,” Sharon shouted. Communication between the models was not as easy as communication with one’s own model, but it shouldn’t be this hard. “Let’s just talk about what happened. I think it went rather well.”
“You saw the looks on their faces,” Caprica admitted, obviously thinking of how Baltar had looked at her.
“But they weren’t all like that. When I was talking to Athena, I could sense her honesty. I know her story now and there’s no way she won’t fight for us even though she’s still loyal to them.”
“Loyal to them are the key words.”
Sharon glared at Cavil.
“You didn’t see inside her head. She knows she has to tread lightly around them and whether she knows it or not, she’s very angry about what happened to her baby. She blames Doc Cottle for murdering their child.”
“Now that I’m interested in,” Boxer said, moving in closer. “What did she say?”
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight: Distortion is Marketable
Athena rolled her shoulders to relieve the tension and then knocked on Adama’s hatch door. A muffled voice answered and she slowly twisted the handle.
It hadn’t been so very long ago that she’d been having weekly chats in here with the Admiral. But everything seemed to change when the Cylons came back.
“Sit down, Lieutenant.”
She sat down in her usual spot and he poured her some tea. It seemed strange to her that he even knew exactly how she liked it.
“Thank you.”
She accepted the cup and stirred it, waiting for him to speak.
“How are you and Helo doing? Is this hard on you?”
“I can’t believe you’re asking me how I’m doing.”
“I’m trying not to think about myself at the moment. I know you’re not her.”
The admission was given in a low voice, but Athena still caught the implications of his tone. This was very hard for him.
“It’s been difficult,” she admitted. “But in a way it’s like coming home and seeing a future I didn’t think possible. I just don’t know if anyone else can see it.”
“Well, let’s hear your report. Maybe I could.”
Athena took a gulp of tea and let the slightly earthy, herbal taste sink into her mouth before revealing to him everything Sharon had shared with her as they downloaded.
“So it’s true.”
“As far as I can tell, sir. She truly wants reconciliation between us. And she can’t live with herself because of what happened between you two.”
Adama looked at Athena sharply.
“That isn’t relevant to the situation, is it?”
“I beg your pardon, Admiral, but it is. This is nothing if not personal. It’s not about diplomacy or Earth. It’s about whether or not the past can be put behind us. I don’t think anyone would disagree with the fact that if there was no history, integration with the Cylons would be incredibly beneficial to both of us.”
“So, it could all come down to whether or not I can forgive an attempt on my life?”
“And whether she can get over the betrayal. Both done to her and by her.”
“That I can’t answer for.”
“No, but I can assure you that she’s trying.” Athena waited a moment as conflicting emotions played over his face. She knew she was one of the only ones who got to see him when he was troubled. Even Lee and Roslin weren’t a part of that. Not anymore. “Can I speak freely?”
“You can try,” he said lightly.
She smiled and searched for the right words.
“Boomer is someone between two worlds. I know what that’s like. You’re someone with a huge decision to make and the fate of humanity rests on your shoulders. Somehow, I don’t think Baltar is going to be very useful in this decision.” He smiled at that. “I spent so long feeling angry and bitter over what happened. But I came to realize it was all just guilt. For the choices I made: betraying my people, losing the baby. The man at the top has to forgive himself. Even if you’ve done nothing in your past, which I don’t think anyone can say, you have to forgive yourself in advance for making what could be the wrong decision. You’ll never know.”
“I shouldn’t even be listening to you,” he grunted. She kept silent. She was used to him feeling unsure about her. It had been awhile since he voiced it. She hoped it was only him remembering the past year and everything that had happened before it. “But I don’t feel alone with you.”
“I’m glad, sir.”
“I trust you.”
“I honestly don’t know how, but I’m grateful.”
“So, I’ll meet with Boomer again.”
“Thank you.”
“I will be blaming you if it all goes bad,” he said and from his smile, she could tell he was joking. It was a good sight to see. “Thank you, Lieutenant. You may go.”
“I’m off duty now. I think I’ll let Helo know the situation.”
“I’m sure he’ll appreciate that.”
Adama shook his head at her and she let a smile play around her lips before leaving.
It was a weight off her shoulders.
***
Even in a place that was designed for multiple copies of one body, it was still odd to see so many Threes in one area.
“Your report?” asked one near the front.
Boxer shook her head.
“The old lady wouldn’t say much, but she obviously knew what I was after and that tells me that we’re right.”
“We are basing a lot on a mere dream,” another Three spoke up.
“Roslin corroborated it whether she knew so or not,” Boxer insisted.
“We believe you. But we want more.”
“Well, we need more. But it will have to wait until we have more information. We have to get back to Galactica.”
“We hope you can go soon,” the first Three said.
Boxer nodded and the meeting of Threes dispersed.
***
Kara finished her patrol and stopped in at the infirmary. It had been a long time since she’d been on a schedule like that. Life on New Caprica was eat, sleep, survive. She was more used to Galactica and the cycle of card games, flight patrols, and everything else that she loved. She was relieved to be back to it.
“How is he doing, Doc?” she questioned Cottle before actually talking to Sam herself.
“He’ll live,” was Doc Cottle’s customary abrupt response before he took a drag on his ever present cigarette.
Kara smiled. Some things never changed.
“How’s it going, Anders?” she asked, ducking around his curtain.
Sam struggled to sit up in his bed.
“I’m not happy lying around like an idiot.”
“Too bad. Doc wants you to rest.”
“So, tell me everything. Or were you waiting till I expired from boredom?”
She sat on the edge of his bed and told him everything that happened in the meeting. She tried to leave out the parts that involved her being glared at by Lee or confronting a possible ovary-abducting Cylon.
“I guess Adama will want to know what Athena conjured up.”
“The old man definitely has a soft spot where she’s concerned. It’s wrong.”
Kara’s tone was only half kidding. She, admittedly, was in the not shooting Athena camp, but they’d had time to come to terms back on Caprica. Plus, that hadn’t involved the rest of the fleet. She owed the Cylon her life and that meant something. But the entire situation hurt to think about, so Kara didn’t try. She’d leave that to the Admiral and Lee. When he wasn’t glaring at her, that is.
“I’m almost glad I wasn’t there.”
“In the end Apollo had a fit and stormed off back to Pegasus.”
“He’s been uptight since the groundbreaking ceremony,” Sam said casually. “Don’t sweat it.”
“How can I when he acts like I’m a frakking leper?”
“You don’t exactly treat him like he’s your brother, Thrace.”
Kara wasn’t sure how to respond to that. She didn’t want to and she did her best to ignore everything that came out of anyone’s mouth that had anything to do with that topic.
“He was like my brother, but it all changed.”
“I’m guessing only you would know how that happened.”
Kara wanted to run away. Sam had brought up the subject in the past, but never pursued it with any tenacity. He wasn’t employing the same tactics this time.
“Why would you care?”
“Why would you think I do?”
“I don’t know.”
“Kara, what aren’t you telling me?”
“Stop acting like my father, Anders. It’s nothing.”
Sam put his hand over hers and held it even when she tried to pull away.
“After Caprica, we said we were going to try this. I thought we fell for each other, not just me on my own. I’m not against you. We are married, let’s try and act like it.”
“It’s not something you want to know.”
“It’s not like I’ve never heard anything about the two of you.”
Kara looked at him. He didn’t look angry, he didn’t look like anything, except like someone with the flu. Later on, she would blame the pasty-ness of his face.
“We had a thing. On New Caprica. We just couldn’t work it out. I couldn’t.”
“Some more details would probably help flesh that out.”
“I was with you, he was with Dee. We, we frakked, okay! He wanted to tell you guys, but I couldn’t do it. I wanted to be free. And I married you.”
“Cause I wouldn’t chain you like he would? Or cause I’m easy to just toss aside?”
“I didn’t want to hurt you. It wasn’t about that.”
Sam's face was clouded over with pain and Kara knew it wasn't from his flu.
“I’m feeling worse now. Let’s talk later.”
“Whatever.”
Kara got up and stormed out of the infirmary. Going with her usual method of not talking about it would have really helped.
***
Lee walked inside and threw his towel on the chair. He’d been to the gym and he could honestly say it was the best decision he’d made in a year. It had been exhausting, but very right, to get back in there and he wasn’t going to give up.
Tigh was waiting for him. Lee sighed. He had hoped to have some time to build himself up to seeing Dee when she was off her rotation. Seeing Kara again had brought up all sorts of ugly past memories and he knew if he was to be fair to Dee, he needed to deal with them. As if that wasn’t enough, there was also the Cylon problem.
“Got a plan, Apollo?” Tigh asked from his position in Lee’s chair.
“Get some dinner later. Night in with the wife.”
“This isn’t a joke.”
“Not when you don’t laugh.”
“Your father’s got the frakking Cylons all cozying up over there. The fleet’s going to tear itself apart.”
“Agreed. But he is the Admiral.”
“Well, do something about it.”
“Talking about my father behind his back has never worked out too well for me in the past.”
“I’m not talking about mutiny or tommyrot like that. I’m talking about sound, practical ways to break this to the rest of the fleet. Take people like, like that idiot Zarek…you think he’ll take this lying down?”
“No.” Lee rubbed his temples. The headache could have come from too much physical exertion, but he didn’t think so. “Look, I don’t have answers. But I’ll think about it. The fleet should get a say, the Quorum should be involved.”
“You better think about it. And fast. The old man’s too involved in this. He’s my friend, but he’s not thinking straight. Doing what he thinks is best, but he doesn’t remember how it affects everyone else.”
“Since when did you become the poster boy for the fleet?” Lee asked, leaning back in his chair.
“Spent a year down there,” Tigh admitted. “They’re a bunch of whining civilians, but it’s not their fault. We’re here to look after them, to ensure the survival of our species.”
“Pretty words from such a gruff exterior.” Lee stood up. “My opinion, the people should vote on whether or not we accept an alliance. But that’s something to plan carefully.”
“Agreed.” Tigh stood up as well. “We’ll talk again.”
“Welcome aboard, Colonel.”
Lee gave a salute which Tigh returned.
“Thank you, Commander.”
Lee sat back down. Back to the more emotionally trying problems.
***
“We should leave.”
The Four was adamant. The Ones clamored with their agreement.
“Enough,” Sharon shouted. Communication between the models was not as easy as communication with one’s own model, but it shouldn’t be this hard. “Let’s just talk about what happened. I think it went rather well.”
“You saw the looks on their faces,” Caprica admitted, obviously thinking of how Baltar had looked at her.
“But they weren’t all like that. When I was talking to Athena, I could sense her honesty. I know her story now and there’s no way she won’t fight for us even though she’s still loyal to them.”
“Loyal to them are the key words.”
Sharon glared at Cavil.
“You didn’t see inside her head. She knows she has to tread lightly around them and whether she knows it or not, she’s very angry about what happened to her baby. She blames Doc Cottle for murdering their child.”
“Now that I’m interested in,” Boxer said, moving in closer. “What did she say?”